Britannia Did It!
by BlindDestiny
Summary: If you were in the Code Geass Universe, what would you steal? Who would you annoy? Would Lelouch threaten to get the terrorists to kill you? No pairings, just stupidity! Mild CrackFic. Definite TrollFic. Co-Author: BubbleGumOfLondon! COMPLETE AT LAST
1. The Cape and the Lancelot

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Zero's Cape… or Suzaku's Lancelot… or Pizza Hut... or Taco Bell... or Alice in Wonderland... I think that covers everything.  
**

**Author's Notes-** Okay, to explain everything! My friend Jordan and I were just simply e-mailing each other… Everything I said is in normal font. Everything she said is in italics. This trend will continue to be simple… I've edit our scripts to be in the Third Person.

Anyway, our e-mails were the start of something great, stupid, and funny. This is what would happen if we were ever in the Code Geass World, what we would steal, and who would be our best friends and whom we would annoy the hell out of. They start out a little strange and like a weak narrative, but they eventually turn into script form!

_**Author's Notes-** I apologize to the ALL GREAT AND MIGHTY ONES _(The Readers)_ for the inside joke about the "Carry me!" thing... Just had to put it in there... And no, I'm not on crack, I just want to be… Hope you enjoy!!_

**Important Notice!!!: **Please keep in mind, that this chapter is severely... well, brain damaged. And if you're positive we're on drugs, at least look at another chapter. I may sound desperate, but Chapter One definitely does this story No Justice.

xXx

"Orange Boy"... Ha, now Lelouch is just messing with him.

_Yeah probably... well Lulu is mean... MEANY!_

I know what he'd say to that…

"Well, the soft at heart have no hope in destroying a system as cold and evil as the Holy Britannian Empire."

_And I'd look at him and go..."what??"_

And he'd say "Exactly."

_And then I'd skip off and tackle Pretty Green Eyes to the ground and complain to him that Lelouch is being mean._

Then Suzaku would try to talk to him about it but he wouldn't be able to find him because he would be out chasing me, swinging a heavy blunt object over his head, yelling, "Stop stealing my cape, dammit!"

_Then you guys would run pass us...and I scream ASHLEIGH!!... And Lelouch would stop and try to hide the heavy object behind his back _

_Then Suzaku would look at all of us and ask if that was Zero's cape?_

Then I'd look at Lelouch- who's glaring death at me- and slowly say: "Uh... nooo..."

You'd probably be laughing your ass off behind Suzaku's back but when he turned around you would stop and grab his wrist, drag him away screaming let's take the Lancelot through a Drive-Thru!

_Then I'd scream C.C were going to pizza hut!!_

_She'd come running out the door...Out of the corner of her eye see you two... stop look at you and ask why you have the cape. Then would probably ask you if you want the mask to go along with it?_

I jump up and down screaming "YES!" and Lelouch would act like he's going to beat himself with the heavy blunt object. She'd tell me where it is and I'd sprint into the Clubhouse at top speed with Lulu still chasing after me. Then C.C. would run off with you two to the Lancelot.

C.C: SHOTGUN!  
Jordan: DRIVING!!  
Suzaku: (Shudders in fear)

_Jordan: Kay so how Do I start this thing  
Suzaku: Maybe I should drive…  
Jordan: NO!_

_Meanwhile…_

_Lulu: Gimmie back my cape!  
(Chasing Ash around his room)  
(Ash ducks under bed comes out other side)  
Ash: FOUND IT! (Mask in hand-__Runs into the dinning room)  
Kallen and Nunnally: What's going on?_

Ashleigh: (Wearing the mask) (Stops in the dining room and looks at Kallen and Nunnally) I FOUND IT!! (Though because she's wearing the mask, Zero's voice comes out instead of her own)  
Kallen: Zero? What? What's going on? Why are you here!? Lelouch?  
Lelouch: (Stops with the (let's call it a bat) held just above her head) Uh... I found Zero! Let me just knock him unconscious and-  
Ashleigh: Ah! No! You can have your stupid mask back! (Takes it off and shoves it into his arms) But I'm keeping the cape! (Runs away)  
Lelouch: Hey! (Runs after her)  
Kallen: Wait, Lelouch, I've got some questions for you! (Runs after him)  
Nunnally: ... What just happened? Hello?

Meanwhile...

C.C.: (On a cellphone) Yeah, I want four large pepperoni pizzas with extra cheese and- you guys want breadsticks?  
Suzaku: (Panicking) Watch out for that-!! Oh, nevermind... but that truck-! Ah, never- HEY THE SPEED LIMIT IS 45!  
Jordan: That only counts for cars, not big yellow robots!!  
C.C: And an order of breadsticks!

_Jordan: Hey Suzaku what's this button do?  
Suzaku: Umm I'm not sure Lloyd just always said not to touch it.  
Jordan: Its really shiny…  
C.C: (Not paying attention, still talking to pizza hut guy/girl, comes over and sits on button...)  
(Lancelot goes into hyper speed)  
Jordan: How do I stop it!!_

_Meanwhile…_

_Kallen: Lelouch! Come on wait up!  
Lulu: I'll destroy you!!  
Ash: You can't catch me! I have the super cape!  
(Next thing they know, the Lancelot comes out of know where and runs out in front of them.)  
(Jordan, C.C, and Suzaku are all screaming for help)_

Ashleigh: Oh dear God... (Turns and runs away from the now Killer-Death-Machine-Giant-Yellow-Robot)  
Lelouch: Oh, you've finally given up have you? Now give me back my- (She run past him and he turns around) Damn you!  
Kallen: (Sees the Lancelot and notices that Lelouch somehow didn't see the damn thing) Uh, Lelouch...  
Lelouch: What? I'm a little preoccupied at the moment, Kallen.  
Kallen: Do you want to die?  
Lelouch: Is that a threat?  
Kallen: (Turns the dumbass around)  
Lelouch: (Shrieks like a little girl)  
Suzaku, Kallen, Jordan, and C.C: (Look at him)  
Suzaku: Hey I think I found the stop! (Reaches up and hits a giant red button, but because he had to get out of his seat to press it he goes flying out the windshield-thing)  
Lelouch: (Sees Suzaku flying right towards him) For the love of- (Suzaku bashes into him at high speed and they both get shoved backwards and land in an interesting situation on the ground... coughcoughwinkwinkhinthint)  
Ashleigh: (From somewhere far away) FANARTFANARTFANART!! NO!!

_Jordan: (looks at C.C) Wanna go get the pizza now?  
C.C: Yes please!  
(They jump out of the Lancelot and decide to walk)  
(Kallen helps Suzaku up while Lulu is cursing under his breath)  
(Suzaku jumps back in the Lancelot before Jordan gets another chance to, and takes it back to Lloyd)  
(Lulu gets up and starts chasing Ash again telling Kallen to help him)__  
(Finally he catches her, and uses geass telling her to give the cape back)  
(She does)  
(But he forgot to tell her to never do it again)  
(So as soon as he gets the cape she snaps out of geass and grabs it back and runs)  
Lulu: Damn…  
Kallen: Jordan, C.C wait up! I'm coming with you!_

(Lelouch eventually catches her again and tries to use the Geass... but forgot that it only works once)  
Lelouch: Now, give me back my cape...  
Ashleigh: (Looks at him like she's in a trance so he thinks it worked) (Gasp!) The eye thing! Do it again! Do it again!  
Lelouch: (Sighs) Great... (Walks away because he knows that she'll follow him yelling, "Do it again!" over and over... which she does.)

Meanwhile...

(Suzaku walks into the local Pizza Hut to find Jordan, Kallen, and C.C. enjoying the pizza.)  
Suzaku: Where's my piece?  
Kallen: (ooks up from her half finished slice with an open mouth that slowly turns into a meek smile.) Sorry! (Sarcastically)

_C.C: Does anyone have money to pay for our pizza?  
(Kallen and Jordan look at Suzaku)  
Suzaku: Ugh fine... now lets go.  
(They return home)  
Jordan: Ash we're home!  
(They see Lulu sitting down on a seat with his face in his hands)  
(Ash behind him in a deep, low voice saying, "Do it!!")  
(C.C takes mask off table and takes it upstairs)  
Jordan: Ash quit bugging him.  
Ash: But I want him to do the Crazy Eye Thing…  
Jordan: He did the Creepy Eye Thing?  
Ash: Yep!  
(Jordan goes and joins Ash in the "Do it!" chant)  
(Finally, Lulu gets up uses Geass on Suzaku to make him forget he saw the cape and convinces Kallen it's a costume)  
(While Jordan and Ash stare in amazement)_

Lelouch: Are you happy!?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Look at each other) Yes!  
Nunnally: (Comes into the room) Lelouch? Is that you? What was all that chaos earlier?  
Lelouch: Uh, nothing! Don't worry about it.  
Jordan: Yeah, it was just Lelouch and Suzaku messing around outside. (Wink)  
Ashleigh: (Shivers) NO! YAOI FANART!! (Hides behind the couch)  
Suzaku: (Blushes) What are you yelling about!?  
Kallen: (Tries to zone out of the conversation)  
Millay: Did I just hear what I think I heard?!  
Lelouch: Student President? What are you doing here?  
Millay: What does it matter, Lulu? I just came in to hear about you and the new transfer student are a little closer than we thought!  
Suzaku: (Blushes more) That's not what's going on!  
Jordan: (Hides with Ash behind couch, listening)  
(They look at each other)

_Jordan: (Pops up) Then why are you blushing!!  
Millay: Oh and what do we have here? Lulu?  
Lulu: I have no idea. They appeared out of nowhere…  
Ash: We came for the cape!  
Jordan: And the big shinny robot!  
Millay: Suzaku, Kallen are they friends of yours?  
(Both shake their heads No)  
Suzaku: So what do we do with 'em…?  
Lulu: (Under his breath) Well their defiantly not staying here…  
Millay (Overhears him) Good idea Lulu!  
Lulu: But... but!!  
Millay: No but's! You have room here!  
Jordan and Ash: (Look at each other and scream YAY!!)_

Jordan and Ashleigh: (Run upstairs to tell C.C the good news)  
Jordan: We can stay! We can stay!  
C.C: Really?  
Ashleigh: Yes, now I can have the cape!  
Jordan: And the Big Yellow Robot!  
C.C: Uh-huh... (Pause) Wanna go swimming?

Meanwhile...

Suzaku: (Red-faced) I swear Madame President, Lelouch and I would never do THAT!  
Kallen: (Successfully zoned out)  
Lelouch: (Walks away to make Hot Coco or something...)  
Millay: Then what's this I hear about "Particular Arrangements"?  
Suzaku: What!? You saw that!?  
Millay: Wow, something like that actually happened?  
Suzaku: Well, yes, but- It was an accident! I would never-  
Kallen: (Suddenly) THE BLACK KNIGHTS!!  
Everyone else: (Stares at her)  
Lelouch: (Sips his coco apathetically)  
(Jordan, C.C, and Ashleigh run in wearing bathing suits. C.C is blindfolded.)  
Suzaku: What are you doing?  
Jordan: The pool's closed! (C.C steps towards her and she runs away from her a bit)  
Ashleigh: So we're going to compensate by playing in the Clubhouse! (C.C steps towards Ashleigh and she scurries away too)  
C.C: (Looks frustrated) MARCO!!  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Very loudly) POLO!!

_Lelouch: Don't break anything…  
(Crash)  
C.C, Jordan, Ash: SORRY!  
Suzaku: Will they be enrolling in our school?  
Millay: I suppose so...They seem nice enough…  
Nunnally: Who's staying and enrolling here??  
Kallen: Two random girls that Suzaku and Lelouch found.  
Nunnally: You go and find girls randomly…?  
Lelouch and Suzaku: NO!  
C.C: I caught Jordan!  
Jordan: Marco??  
C.C, Ash: POLO!!  
(Jordan grabs Lelouch)  
Jordan: You're it!  
Lulu: I'm not playing.  
Ash: (Whispers in his ear) Do it or I'll steal the cape again.  
Nunnally: Go on and play!  
Lulu: Fine... Marco...  
C.C and Me: YOU HAVE TO PUT ON THE BLINDFOLD!_

Ashleigh: (Looks around)  
Lelouch: Why can't I just close my eyes to play your childish game?  
Jordan: Because you'll cheat.  
Lelouch: What makes you think that??  
C.C: He cheats a lot. He's a sore loser too.  
Lelouch: You…  
Jordan: Just put on the blindfold, Lulu!  
C.C: Yeah, _Lulu…_  
Lelouch: (Narrows his eyes at C.C.)  
Ashleigh: (Suddenly puts the cape on him… but BACKWARDS!) There! Now you don't need a blindfold! The massive collar makes up  
for it…  
Millay: These girls cosplay?  
Jordan: Yeah, sure, why not!  
Lelouch: (Starts swinging his arms around) Dammit, why the hell would you-  
(Crash)  
C.C, Jordan and Ashleigh: DON'T BREAK STUFF, LULU!

_(Lulu stands back up)  
Jordan: Hey you guys! Lets play Ring Around the Lulu!  
(Jordan, Ash, C.C, all start. We bring in Suzaku.)  
(Kallen and Millay are on their asses laughing)  
Lulu: I give up…  
Ash: WE WIN!!  
C.C: What did we win?  
Jordan: We have no idea... I want Taco Bell...Suzaku??  
Suzaku: No!  
Ash: Please??  
Suzaku: No.  
C.C: What is Taco Bell??  
Jordan: Fine… Wanna play dress up?  
(Ash shakes head eagerly)  
(They grab Lulu and Suzaku and run upstairs)  
(When they finally bring them down, Lelouch is dresses up in C.C's white outfit and Suzaku in one of Nunnally's dresses.)_

Lelouch: (Sighs) How did it come to this, Suzaku?  
Suzaku: (Smiles and plays with the frill on the dress)  
Lelouch: (Shakes his head) Get it together!  
Millay: (Messes with Suzaku's frighteningly short dress) (Wolf-Whistle) Sexay, Sexay!  
Kallen: (Looks at Lelouch and tries to cover her laughter but fails miserably) (snicker)... Bondage... (snicker)  
C.C: (Sees Lelouch and taps her chin. She eventually throws her hands up in the air.) I'm sorry Lelouch, but that All-Out White makes you look pudgy.  
Nunnally: It's all that Pizza Hut you're always eating, Big Brother... I told you to cut back on that stuff.  
Jordan: Yeah, just leave all the touching and rubbing to Suzaku…  
Suzaku: (Turns around) Hey! (Realizes that when he turned around the bottom of the dress flew up and showed off his undies)  
(Kallen, Millay, Jordan, C.C., and Ashleigh all collapse in laughter)  
Lelouch: (Raises an eyebrow) ... Unicorns?  
Suzaku: (Blush) Shut up! It's- uh- Laundry Day...!

_Kallen: I think both of these outfits need something, but what??  
Jordan: Bows?  
Kallen: No  
Ash: Lipstick?  
Millay: Save that for later!  
C.C : Cat ears??  
Kallen, Jordan, Ash: YES!  
Jordan: Hey Ash let's dress em up like Alice in Wonderland!  
Lulu: Oh no you don't! (runs back up stairs)  
Ash: Wait, wait, Lulu! (Trips a bit) Carry me!  
(Everyone just stares while Jordan laughs)  
Jordan: Now what?  
(Suzaku finally goes upstairs to change after he's done playing with the dress)_

Meanwhile...

Lelouch: (Leaning on the door inside his bedroom) No! No Alice in Wonderland!  
Ashleigh: (Trying to push the door open) Common! Pweetie Alice!!  
Suzaku: (Stares for a moment) ... (Suddenly cheerful) Can I be the Hatter?  
Jordan: (Running up the stairs) NO! I AM ZEH HATTER! (Pause) You can be the White Rabbit!  
Suzaku: Okay!  
Ashleigh: Bunny Rabbit!  
Lelouch: (Groans behind the door)  
(They eventually give up on Alice in Wonderland because Lelouch refused to come out of his room and Jordan and Ashleigh- with their ADD- get bored and move on to something else.)

XxX

**Author's Notes-** Well that's our first chapter! It's really stupid and really random, I know, but it sets up for all the other chapters. The rest of the chapters actually have plotlines!

_**Author's Notes-** __Sorry about the "Carry me!" inside joke, but I had to put it in there! All Great and Mighty Ones!_

**What she said,**

_**-Destiny**_


	2. Pretty Green Eyes!

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Skittles…**

**Author's Notes- **Okay, the first chapter was really… really… dumb. But this one actually has substance to it, and isn't just one long digression… It mostly has to do with Jordan bugging the hell out of poor, innocent Suzaku. I'm going to put this chapter completely in the third person. Not because I got a complaint, but because it's bothering me and I'm a perfectionist. The Normal-Italics system is still here though.

_**Author's Notes- **__I love Suzaku, and would never torture him on purpose. It's just funny!_

xXx

_One week later…_

_Jordan: C.C! C.C!_  
_Ash: We painted our rooms!  
Jordan: Mines purple!  
Ash: Mines green. So… sorry C.C., your not allowed in there.  
C.C: Huh? Why not?  
Ash: 'Cause it's green… and your hair will blend in… so you'd be bald…  
Jordan: And Lulu isn't allowed in mine 'cause then… (Creepy voice) He'd look like he has no eyes…!!  
C.C: Oh… I get it!_

_Later that day…_

_(AT SCHOOL!!)  
Milly: Jordan!! Ashleigh!!__  
Jordan and Ash: ELLO!  
Milly: Would you like to do a special mission for me?  
Ash: (excitedly) Okay!  
Milly: You guys are sitting near Lelouch in our next class, so If you see him falling asleep like usual… wake him up for me, 'kay?  
(Ash and Jordan solute her like they're in the military and walk away)_

Next class…!

Teacher: (Drones on and on, drawing on the board)  
Jordan: (Munches on Skittles) (Looks at Suzaku, on her right, and Ashleigh, on her left)  
Suzaku: (Takes notes)  
Ash: (Tries to sleep)  
Jordan: (Looks to the table in front of her at Lelouch, sleeping with his hand situated in a strange position) (Nudges Ash)  
Ash: (Whispers) What?  
Jordan: (Also whispers) Look. (Points at Lelouch and takes a few more Skittles) How are we supposed to wake him up?  
Ash: (Looks over Jordan's bag of Skittles) You have projectiles… use them… (Puts her head back on the table)  
Jordan: Good idea! (Picks out a bright yellow Skittle and takes aim… fires!)  
(The Skittle skids over Lulu's desk, not disturbing him in the slightest)  
Jordan: Ugh, I missed… (Gets an idea and nudges Suzaku)  
Suzaku: Hm? (Suddenly gets the Skittle bag shoved into his hand)  
Jordan: Hold onto this for me, kay?  
Suzaku: (Watches Jordan hide a handful of skittles and sets the bag by his books before continuing to take tokes)  
Jordan: (Aims again… fires… hits him in the back)  
Lelouch: (Happy dreams of destroying Britannia… and Mac and Cheese, maybe)  
Jordan: (Picks up her last Skittle- she'd eaten the rest- and tosses it at Lulu's head)  
(Bonk!)  
Lelouch: (Suddenly wakes up from the blow to the head) What the-…? (Sees the several Skittles surrounding his desk and  
turns around)  
Jordan: (Acting nonchalant, looking straight ahead, with a finger pointed at Suzaku)  
Suzaku: (Has no idea what's going on and keeps taking notes)  
Lelouch: (Sees the bag of Skittles beside Suzaku's books. Glares at him)  
Jordan: (Pokes Suzaku to get his attention)  
Suzaku: (Looks up) (Notices Lelouch's look of pure evil)  
Lelouch: (Mouths 'I will get you' and turns around)  
Suzaku: (His pencil slowly falls out of his hand and clatters onto the desk) Huh… What did I do?  
Jordan: (Tries to cover up her laughter with her hand)  
Ash: (Buries her head in her arms and tries to laugh silently)  
Suzaku: (Still completely oblivious to what's going on)

Later…

_Ash:(Zzzzzzzz)  
Lelouch:(Zzzzzzzzzz)  
Suzaku:(Notes-notes)  
Teacher: (Blah-lala)  
Jordan: (Thinking) lalala so bored… Hmmm I wonder if Suzaku is ticklish?? (Leans over and pokes him) (Out loud) Poke. (Leans over again and pokes him) Poke.  
Suzaku: (Quietly) Stop it…!  
Jordan :(Pokes him two more times) Poke-poke!  
Suzaku: (Moves over a little)  
Jordan: Po-... po-? ...(Scoots towards him even more) Poke!  
(This goes on till end of class…)  
(BRING!)  
(Suzaku gets up and walks away)  
Jordan: (Leans over to poke Suzaku) POKE! (Reaches too far and falls into the floor) Ah! I missed!  
Ash: So I noticed…_

After class…

(Jordan follows Suzaku out the door and keeps poking him)  
Jordan: Poke, poke, poke!  
Suzaku: (Sighs) Could you please stop doing that?  
Ash: (Sleepily looks at Jordan, then back to Suzaku and shakes her head)  
Lelouch: (Suddenly walks up) I think it's fitting punishment.  
Suzaku: (Looks up) What… What are you talking about, Lelouch?  
Lelouch: I said I'd get you.  
Suzaku: (Points at Jordan) You told her to do this!?  
Lelouch: … No…  
Suzaku: Oh… So… What're you going to do?  
Lelouch: You'll see.  
Suzaku: Uh huh… I'm so scared, Lelouch. What're you gonna do? Beat me at chess?  
Jordan and Ash: (Start laughing)  
Lelouch: (Walks away)  
Suzaku: What's with that guy… I never did anything to him.  
Jordan: Yeah, let's go with that.  
Ash: (Staring into space) The evil protagonist will enact his revenge…  
Jordan and Suzaku: (Pause) … What?  
Ash: (Grabs Jordan and starts walking to their next class) Watch out for flying chess pieces!  
Suzaku: (Pause) … What?

_After school back at the clubhouse..._

_Suzaku: (Sitting at a desk with his home work)  
Jordan: (Sitting on the couch watching T.V) Hey, Pretty Green Eyes!  
Suzaku: (Keeps working)  
Jordan: Pretty Green Eyes... PRETTY GREEN EYES! ... Preeeeeettttttyyyyy Grrrreeeennn Eeeeyyyyeeess…_

_...(AFTER ONE HOUR)..._

_Jordan: Pretty Green Eyes... Pretty Green Eyes!  
Ash: (Walks in) Hey Suzaku… You know she's talking to you.  
Suzaku: (Looks up) Huh, what?_  
_Ash: YOU'RE Pretty Green Eyes!  
Suzaku: Oh, um… What is it?  
Jordan: Will you had me the remote!?  
Suzaku: Yeah, sure- wait, what?! All this for an hour... JUST FOR THE REMOTE!!  
Jordan: Yeah, got a problem with it?  
Suzaku: (Hands her the remote and goes back to work)  
Ash: (Joins Jordan on couch)  
(C.C and Lelouch come walking down the stairs)  
C.C: Lelouch… why are you Lelouch?  
Lelouch: I don't have time to discuss philosophy with you, C.C.  
Jordan and Ash: WE DO!!  
C.C.: Really? So why is he Lelouch?  
Ash: Lelouch is Lelouch because he's good like that!_

Suzaku: (Looks up from his work just because of the conversation)  
C.C.: Yeah, but… why is he good like that?  
Jordan: Because he can do that!  
Lelouch: (Pinches the bridge of his nose)  
C.C.: Huh… but… Why can he do that?  
Ash: Because he's Lelouch! Everything is completely understandable.  
C.C.: Oh… Of course, I understand.  
Lelouch: How can you understand THAT??  
Jordan: Because she's C.C.  
Lelouch: What?  
C.C.: Yeah, Lelouch. Because I'm C.C.  
Lelouch: … (His eye twitches and he walks away)  
C.C: (Follows Lelouch)  
Suzaku: … (Blink) … Okay then. (Keeps working)  
Jordan: (Gets up and sits beside Suzaku) Hey, Pretty Green Eyes, guess what?  
Suzaku: (Cautiously) What…?  
Jordan: (Quickly rubs her cheek on his shoulder and pulls back so it looks like she's doing some twisted version of the robot) Purr!  
Suzaku: (Looks at her)  
Jordan: (Does it again) Purr!  
Ash: Jordy, you're scaring the poor guy.  
Jordan: (Looks down) Aw… (Suddenly cheerful) Oh well! (Sits back on the couch)  
Suzaku: (Continues working because his mind can't process what just happened)

Later…

_Jordan: C.C help me make dinner!  
Ash: YOU'RE cooking??  
Jordan: Yes! Do you have a problem with that?  
Ash: Maybe... I think Lulu should cook!  
Lelouch: Fine by me…  
Suzaku: No way! He'll poison me for what ever the hell I did!  
Ash + Jordan: (Snicker)  
C.C: Can we order take out?  
Nunnally: Haven't we had enough pizza lately?  
Jordan: I told you I'd cook!  
Ash: No! Lulu, cook.  
Suzaku: No!  
Ash: Want me to cook?  
C.C: No, take out!  
Lelouch: How about I cook and Suzaku can supervise so he can make sure that I don't poison him…  
All: Fine!  
Jordan, Ash, and C.C: (Sneak off to do something sneaky)_

(By the time Lelouch and Suzaku are finished in the kitchen they walk into the living room where Jordan, Ashleigh, and C.C are playing Monopoly!)  
C.C: (Moves the little doggy and picks up a card) "Go directly to jail"!?  
Jordan and Ash: (Laugh)  
Ash: (Rolls the dice and moves) Yes! Boardwalk! (Stands up) I own you all! (Laughs)  
Jordan: (Suddenly flips the game board over) Oops!  
C.C: Aw, I had a Get Out of Jail Free card…

_Lelouch: Dinners ready…  
(Everyone eats)  
Suzaku: What's for dessert?  
Jordan: I HAVE AN IDEA! (Runs up stairs and comes back holding a red bag) It's Skittles!!  
Lelouch: (Stands up so fast he almost knocks over the table) IT WAS YOU!!  
Jordan: Oh shit… (Drops the Skittles and runs for the door)  
(For the rest of that night Jordan, Ashleigh, And C.C use walkie-talkies to tell Jordy where Lulu was hiding to ambush her.)_

_End_

XxX

**Author's Notes- **Okay, this chapter pretty much followed one central theme: Jordan annoying and scaring the hell out of Suzaku! Plus, maybe Lelouch thinking we're all mentally melted… I don't think Lelouch will actually take his revenge any time soon… Maybe Chapter 4… Who really knows? He has to think about it for a while and set it up.

_**Author's Notes- **__I LOVE SKITTLES!!_

**We know, Jordan… we know,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter: ** Dead Lulu! (Summary: Lulu gets hit on the head pretty hard and thinks he's dead for a day.)


	3. Dead Lulu!

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Disney Land...  
**

**Author's Notes- **This chapter was originally going to be about Lelouch thinking he's gangster… but we changed our minds.

_**Author's Notes-**__ Enjoy Chapter 3!_

xXx

At the Clubhouse…

…(Saturday!)…

(C.C is at Pizza Hut… Suzaku is at the Military Base… Nunnally is… somewhere…)  
(… This leaves three of our main characters… alone… in the Clubhouse…)

(The air reeks of anarchy…)

Jordan: (Looking through the kitchen) Where's my cookie cake!?  
(Several thuds are heard upstairs)  
Jordan: (Looks up) What was that? (Runs upstairs) It sounds like a stampede…  
Lelouch: (In the other room) (Incomprehensible shouting)  
Jordan: (Slowly walks down the hallway)  
Ash: (Suddenly bursts out of a room and sprints down the hallway wearing Zero's cape)  
Jordan: Ashleigh?  
Lelouch: (Runs after his cape) Dammit, I even hid it this time!  
Ash: (Running past Jordan) Shit, he's really mad this time, Jordy!  
Jordan: (Watches the two rush by) … What am _I_ supposed to do?  
Ash: (Runs into a room and shuts the door)  
Lelouch: I'm going to have to start putting a padlock on it, aren't I!?  
Ash: (Pops out of another door three rooms down and quickly crosses the hallway.) (Opens another door) Ack! A closet! (Turns and accidentally knocks over a stack of towels. They scatter all over the floor)  
Lelouch: I could have those terrorists over here with one phone call! (Runs towards her)  
Ash: (Turns to run)  
Lelouch: (Steps on a towel and suddenly slips on the hardwood floor.) (Tips over to the right and flies over half the staircase.)  
Jordan and Ash: (Shocked and Panicking) Lelouch!  
Lelouch: (Tumbles down the rest of the stairs. When he hits the floor below he slides over it and his head hits the opposite wall with a loud-)

(BANG!)

Lelouch: (Slowly opens his eyes to see a blurry Jordan and Ashleigh hovering over him)  
Ash and Jordan: Lulu! Are you okay!?  
Jordan: Oh my god… uh, uh- (Holds up three fingers) How many fingers do you see!?  
Lelouch: (Blinks) … San…  
Jordan: What!? San!? Oh my god, he's lost his mind!  
Ash: Jordan! Calm! Speak English, Lulu.  
Lelouch: (Looks dizzy and confused) … three…?  
Jordan: Okay, okay… Whew, you're alright. You took a really nasty fall…  
Ash: … but it looked awesome.  
Lelouch: What's going on…?  
Jordan: You fell down the stairs chasing after her. (Points at Ash)  
Ash: Hey, it's not my fault he fell.  
Jordan: Still I thought he was going to leave us for a minute…  
Lelouch: … Where was I going…?  
Jordan: Heaven, stupid!  
Ash: Or hell… I mean, common, he _is_ Lelouch.  
Lelouch: Le… louch? Is that my name?  
Jordan and Ash: (Look at him. Thoroughly shocked.)  
Jordan: (Suddenly stands up) This is a disaster!!  
Ash: (Stands up as well) Calm down, Jordan. He should regain his normal conscious after a while, or if we remind him of himself… (Whispers) Until then, lets have some fun with it, kay?

Jordan: You're horrible… Let's do it!

_Lelouch: So, where am I?  
Jordan: Heaven!  
Ash: You're dead.  
Lelouch: Dead?  
Jordan: Yep!  
Lelouch: Are the both of you dead also?  
Jordan: Nope!  
Ash: We're the only ones who can see you.  
Lelouch: I see… and your names are?  
Jordan: You can call the one with cape Queen.  
Ash: Fine, then you can call her Nightmare!  
Lelouch: Nice to meet you… I guess…  
Jordan: Hey Lulu… Umm, that's your nickname by the way...Did you know if your dead you can walk through walls!?  
Ash: JORDY! NO!  
Jordan: Shh!  
(Jordan and Ash help Lulu up.)  
Jordan: Look, just try to walk through that wall.  
(Lelouch touches the wall)  
Lelouch: I'm not sure… it seems pretty solid.  
Ash: Well, it won't work unless you get a running start and FOCUS, stupid!  
Lelouch: Alright… (Takes a few steps back, closes his eyes.)  
(And ...BAM! Runs smack dab into the middle of the wall)  
Jordan and Ash: Oh my god! Lulu!  
Jordan: I'll go get the Aspirin… I didn't think he'd actually TRY it!  
Ash: (Helps Lulu up) Are you okay this time??  
Lelouch: …The birds around my head are so pretty…_

Ash: … He's delusional. (Calls towards the other room) Jordy, hurry with the medicine!  
Lelouch: (Tries to grab the little birds out of the air and can't figure out why he's missing)  
Ash: (Stares at him for a while) Okay, let's sit down now… (Directs him to the couch)  
Lelouch: (Sits down and pauses, looking straight ahead) Does anyone else see a red dot?  
Jordan: (Comes in with the medicine) What? (Turns and looks) What dot?  
Lelouch: Seriously, do you not see it?  
Jordan: (Eyes him carefully) Take this medicine, Lulu. (Hands him a glass of water and two pills) They'll help you return to normal. (Pats him on the head)  
Lelouch: (Takes the Aspirin) What's… normal… for me?  
Jordan: Well-  
Ash: (Playing with the cape) Overthrowing the government.  
Jordan: I wasn't going to put it THAT way but…  
Lelouch: Ghosts can overthrow the government…?  
Jordan and Ash: (Look at each other and realize that he still thinks he's dead)  
Ash: Uh… yeah! They killed you, so you want revenge. You're actually very spiteful.  
Jordan: (Nods) Yep! You'd do anything to destroy Britannia.  
Lelouch: Really? That's good… I think… but I don't FEEL angry.  
Ash: We have GOT to do something about that…  
Jordan: But how?  
Ash: (Whispers something to Jordan)  
Jordan: (Gets a big smile on her face.) (Looks at Lelouch and sits down beside him)  
Lelouch: (Feels a bit frightened)  
Jordan: Poke! (Pokes him)  
Lelouch: (Stares blankly at her)  
Jordan: (Pokes him over and over again) Poke, poke… POKE, poke-poke, poke, poke…!  
Lelouch: (Is being poked so much he's starting to move like he's being pushed over and over) Could you stop that?  
Jordan: Poke poke poke poke poke poke poke poke! :(You get the idea):  
Lelouch: (Shuts his eyes; annoyed) Stop…  
Jordan: (Doesn't)  
Lelouch: (Stands up quickly) Cut it out! (Collapses onto the couch because he's still dizzy and he stood up too fast.)  
Ash: There's the anger!  
Lelouch: THAT'S your plan!? Aggravate me to death!? I mean… wait…  
Ash: It worked, didn't it?  
Jordan: (Pokes the air) Poke!  
Lelouch: (Looks at her then turns his head) Tch.  
Ash: I dunno… I think it just made him hate you, Jordy…  
Jordan: Aw…  
Lelouch: … If I'm dead… why couldn't I walk through that wall…?  
Jordan: Because… you're a solid ghost…?  
Lelouch: But you two are the only ones that can see me right?  
Jordan and Ash: (Nod)  
Voice from far way: Yoo-hoo! Lulu!  
Ash: Oh, crap, it's Milly!  
Jordan: The Student Council President? How are we going to explain-  
Lelouch: Who's Milly?  
Milly: (From behind Lelouch) Who's Milly? (Puts her hand on her heart) Why, Lulu, I'm hurt! I stopped by to say hello and this is how I'm greeted?  
Lelouch: Wait, you can see me?  
Milly: Well, of course, silly! What did you think you were, transparent?  
Lelouch: (Looks at Jordan and Ash) But you two said I was dead! Then this Milly girl walks in and tells me otherwise? Who am I supposed to trust?  
Milly: Dead? Oh, no, no, no, Lulu! You're very much alive!  
Lelouch: (Still looking at Jordan and Ash) Why would you say that…?  
Milly: WE'RE the ones that are dead!  
Jordan and Ash: (Look at Milly)  
Jordan, Ash, and Lelouch: What?  
Milly: Of course! You've been talking to spirits this entire time! YOU'RE the only one that can see US!

_Jordan: (Whispers in Ash's ear) Sweet! Now we have Milly on our side.  
(Suzaku walks through door)  
Suzaku: You guys I'm here!  
Lelouch: Who's that?  
Jordan: Umm… Your soul mate!  
Lelouch: Wha?  
Ashleigh: Yeah, he was pretty sad when you died…  
Suzaku: What are you guys rambling about now!?  
Ashleigh: Shh, were trying to convince Lulu he's dead.  
Lelouch: But she (points at Milly) just said that you guys were the dead ones!  
Suzaku: What, none of us are dead!  
Jordan, Ash, and Milly: Shh!  
Suzaku: Look. (Takes cookie cake out of Jordan's hands) (Yes, she finally found it.) Here if you were dead you wouldn't be able to eat this.  
Lelouch: (Looks at food) (Doesn't know what to do)  
Suzaku: (Shoves food into his mouth)  
Ash: Aw look! The soul mates are feeding each other.  
Suzaku: SHUT UP! (Talking to Lulu) Now chew and swallow…  
Lelouch: (Coughs a little) That was delicious, may I have more?  
Jordan: Sure it's in the kitchen!  
Lelouch: (Goes for more Cookie Cake)  
Suzaku: How come he doesn't remember anything!?  
(Ashleigh and Jordan explain what happened)_

Suzaku: I see… So he just hit his head?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Nod)  
Suzaku: … and has amnesia of almost everything?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Nod)  
Suzaku: … This is a cruel and unusual joke you're playing… and I for one will have no part in it! (Crosses his arms and closes his eyes proudly)  
Ash: Look, it's Mr. Noble…  
Milly: Come now, Suzaku… Why let such a great opportunity pass you by?  
Jordan: You know you wanna mess with him too, Pretty Green Eyes!  
Suzaku: (Opens his eyes)  
Lelouch: (Comes back in the room) What have you guys been talking about?  
Suzaku: (Grabs Lelouch by both shoulders) Listen to me…  
Lelouch: (Scared) Oh, no, they weren't lying when they called you my soul mate were they!?  
Suzaku: (Shakes him) Shut up and listen… They've been lying to you this entire time…  
Jordan, Ash, and Milly: Suzaku!  
Lelouch: (Confused) They have?  
Suzaku: Yes… your name isn't Lelouch.  
Jordan, Ash, and Milly: (Fall back from almost strangling Suzaku to trying not to laugh)  
Lelouch: What? It's not? But I just got used to it…  
Suzaku: I'm sorry, but that's not it.  
Lelouch: Oh… okay… Then, what is it?  
Suzaku: (Smiles) It's Lulubelle!

_Jordan, Ash, Milly: (Snicker)  
Lelouch: But I'm a boy…  
Jordan: Are you sure about that?  
Milly: It doesn't matter. That's your name.  
Lelouch: Ok whatever… so since everything they told me was a lie: I'm not really dead, and neither are any of you.  
Suzaku: Nope, we're all living.  
Lelouch: Ok so then where are we really?  
Jordan: Disney Land!  
Lelouch: I thought there were rides at Disney Land.  
Ash: There are rides here. (Takes out a mattress from…well, we're not sure where it came from.) See you take this "tube" and go down the waterslide over there. (Points to the stairs)  
Milly: Come on, Lulubelle, lets go!  
(Milly, Ashleigh, Lulu and gathered on top on the mattress at the top of the stairs.)  
Lelouch: If this is a waterslide then how come there's no water.  
Ashleigh: Its invisible water... Try not to fall in okay?  
Milly: 3… 2...1! Push us Suzaku!  
(Suzaku pushes and off they go!)  
Ash, Milly: WEEEE!! YAAAAYY!!  
(Down at bottom of stairs…)  
Ash: Lulu you can let go of my sides now...you nails are digging into me…  
Milly: Awww poor Lulubelle! He's petrified.  
Jordan: come on Suzaku its our turn!  
Nunnally: Everyone what's going on??  
Milly: Oh crap! We can't keep this up with Nunnally… That would just be too cruel…_

Jordan: (Sitting on the mattress at the bottom of the stairs with Suzaku) Yeah, I guess it would be…  
Suzaku: I guess it's time to knock him back to normal.  
Milly: (Nods) Yes, but how are we going to do that?  
Lelouch: What are you guys talking about??  
Ash: (Bonks him on the head with the bat that was previously mentioned in Chapter 1)  
Lelouch: Ow! (Rubs his head) What did you do that for?  
Ash: Looks like I didn't hit him hard enough… (Raises the bat again)  
Suzaku: Wait, wait! (Takes the bat away from her) We're not getting anywhere this way.  
Nunnally: Not getting anywhere what way, Suzaku?  
Suzaku: Uh, it's nothing Nunnally. We're just…  
Jordan: Playing a role playing game!  
Suzaku: Yeah, that's it. An RPG.  
Nunnally: Well, okay… It sounded like you guys were riding down the stairs on a mattress or something. (Leaves the room)  
(Everyone visibly exhales. Except for the ever-oblivious Lulu)  
Lelouch: Who was that girl?  
Suzaku: She's the muffin man- now we really have to fix you.  
Lelouch: (Disregards his explanation) You're not going to hit me, are you?  
Milly: Why don't we just retrace our steps? You know, fix him the way it happened. Like hitting a stereo!  
Jordan: Yeah, we need to make him fall down the stairs again!  
Suzaku: Good luck getting him to willingly jump down the stairs…  
Ash: We could make him go down the waterslide again…  
Lelouch: It's really weird with you guys talking about me like this and I'm standing right here…  
Jordan: Yeah! Suzaku, you think you could push the mattress REALLY hard this time?  
Suzaku: I guess so…  
Jordan: Okay, Lulu- (Her and Suzaku pull the mattress to the top of the stairs again) Hop on.  
Lelouch: By myself, are you crazy?? I really will die!  
Suzaku: He's too fragile to do it alone.  
Milly: It's okay. He can just have someone with him.  
Suzaku: I'm pushing…  
Jordan: Uh… I'm helping!  
Milly: I'm just not doing it.  
Ash: (Just found the bat- that Suzaku hid- and was about to go after Lelouch with it) Now that's just not fair!

_Ashleigh: You guys, if I go with him, I'll also hit my head and lose my memory.  
Milly: She has a point there…  
Jordan: Mmmm… I have it! Ash, go get one of my stuffed animals!  
Ashleigh: Okay! (Runs to Jordan's room, bringing back an orange bear)__  
Jordan: (Gasp!) Not that one! It's my favorite!!  
Ashleigh: Too bad. (Hands the bear to Lulu)  
Jordan: Fine… Hold on to that when you get scared.  
Lelouch: Oh… um, alright. (Sits on mattress)  
Suzaku: Alright 3...2...1… Go!  
(Suzaku and Jordan shove as hard a possible to where Lulu goes flying at morph speed.)  
(With out anything to hold on to, Lelouch goes flying off and rolls down the rest of the stairs, hitting his head.)  
(Everyone goes running after him and stands over him)  
Suzaku: Lulubelle are you ok?!  
Lelouch: Who the hell are you calling Lulubelle?! And what's up with this random mattress being here??  
Ashleigh: Lelouch, do you remember anything?  
Lelouch: The last thing I remember was chasing after you and my cape! By the way, when did The President and Suzaku get here?  
Milly: Well, after you fell they called us to come and see if you were okay.  
Suzaku: That's our story and we're sticking with it!  
Lelouch: Ok you! (Looks at Ash) Now where's my cape??  
Ashleigh: Uh, uh... gotta go! (Runs out door)  
Lelouch: Wait, wait! (Runs after her)  
(Jordan walks over to the shreds of orange of what use to be her favorite bear)  
Jordan: Mr. Kitty Fantastico...what did he do to you? (Tears rolling down her face)  
Suzaku: Look since you had to give up your favorite stuffed animal, how about I treat you to a ride in the Lancelot?  
Jordan: (Suddenly perks up) Ok!_

(Suzaku leads Jordan to the Lancelot)  
Milly: (Looks around) Ah, well. It was fun while it lasted! (Goes back to the school) Now I've got some dirt on him!

Suzaku: (Starts the Lancelot) Okay, hold on…  
Jordan: (Not paying attention) When do I get to drive? (Lancelot goes into hyper speed and practically gives her whiplash.) (She screams) WHEN YOU STOP THIS THING I'M GOING TO ANNOY YOU SO MUCH!!  
Suzaku: It'll be worth it.

(Lelouch and Ashleigh take a time out to catch their breath)  
Lelouch: I can't… figure out how… you keep finding it...  
Ash: Hey, you know, Milly probably left after we did… so that means we left Suzaku alone with Jordan…  
Lelouch: I bet she scares the hell out of him by sundown…  
Ash: (Shakes her head) No, no. He'll want rid of her by later tonight when he goes to sleep.  
Lelouch: Did you see the look on his face yesterday when she did that weird cat-thing?  
Ash: I'll bet twenty bucks.  
Lelouch: Fine. (Starts walking back to the clubhouse) I'm going back now… I really want a piece of cookie cake right now…

XxX

**Author's Notes- **That's my favourite chapter so far! I wonder if Lelouch with ever figure out what happened… and I figured out that I can pull mattresses out of nowhere… I think…

_**Author's Notes- **__My favorite person was missing from this chapter... So sorry if she was your favorite person also. Promise she'll be in the next one!_

**She will be, **

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter: **The Christmas Special. (We had to have one, you know. Summary: It's pretty self-explanatory…)


	4. The Christmas Special

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Pizza Hut…**

**Author's Notes- **Okay, the Christmas Special has arrived! All I can say is… What kind of alarm clocks have YOU heard, Jordan? (You'll see what I mean)

_**Author's Notes- **__It's really Christmas in July!_

xXx

_(Ding)(Ding)(DING!)  
Lelouch: (Turns off his alarm clock and walks down stairs)  
Suzaku: Good morning, Lelouch.  
Lelocuh: Good morning.  
(C.C follows in after him) Morning!  
Ash: Hey, someone go wake up Jordy or she won't get up till 3.  
Lelouch: I'll do it… (Walks into Jordan's room) Jordan time to wake- AAHHHH!! (Runs screaming down the stairs)  
C.C: Lelouch what's wrong?  
Lelouch: Ma... ma...monster!!  
Suzaku: (Jumps up) What! Where?!  
Lelocuh: In Jordan's room! (Still grabbing his heart from the shock.)  
(At this time Jordan comes strolling down the stairs looking for coffee)  
Lelouch: (Looks petrified)__  
Ash: Oh, don't worry, that's just how Jordan looks every morning. (Smiles)  
Lelouch: How can you be so care-free!?  
Jordan: I couldn't find my straightener last night...Ash?  
Ash: What? I didn't take it.  
C.C:(Walks over and pokes Jordan's hair) So this is your natural hair…  
Jordan: Unfortunately… (Spots the calendar next to the coffee pot) You guys its almost Christmas!  
Lelouch: Already? Wow, time flies…  
Ash: Quick, we have to get a tree!  
(Jordan and Ash grab Lelocuh and Suzaku and go flying out of the door, past Kallen, with an axe in hand. Of course, C.C follows)  
Kallen: Where are you guys going!?  
C.C: To get a Christmas tree!_

Jordan: Why don't you come with us, Kallen?  
Kallen: Uh, I don't-  
C.C.: (Suddenly grabs her and drags her along anyway)  
Ash: Hey, Jordan… where are we going to find a tree in the middle of the city?  
Jordan: You're right… Guess we won't need this. (Tosses the axe over her shoulder and almost amputates Suzaku's foot by accident)  
Suzaku: (Jumped behind Lelouch- like that's going to do any good) Hey! Watch where you throw that thing!  
Jordan: Sorry Pretty Green Eyes!  
C.C.: Do they not have places to buy a tree?  
Kallen: This is Jap- I mean, Area 11… Christmas isn't that big of a holiday here.  
C.C.: They should still have them somewhere, right? We could make a tree out of old Pizza Hut Boxes…  
Lelouch: No. I'm not having our tree smell like old cheese.  
Suzaku: Does it have to be a pine tree?  
Jordan: Well… no, not really…  
Ash: I have an idea!  
(She drags everyone to the mall)

(A few minutes later…)

(Jordan, Ashleigh, Kallen, and C.C. peer around doors and corners)  
Kallen: Okay, it's clear!  
(Lelouch and Suzaku walk around the corner carrying fake potted plants from inside the mall)  
Lelouch: This was a stupid idea…  
Ash: Shut up and walk.

_(…Back at clubhouse…)  
Ash: Lulu set yours over in that corner near the fire place, Suzaku your smaller one goes in the kitchen  
Lelouch: How come you got to carry the smaller one…?  
Kallen: 'Cause you need to build more muscle.  
(Jordan comes running down from her room)  
Jordan: Here use these feather boas as tinsel for the tree.  
C.C: What are we using for lights?  
Suzaku: What about flashlights?  
Ash: Go get em, now then for the star??  
C.C: (Hands Ash a cut out star from a pizza box)  
Jordan: Great now Lelouch get on Suzaku's shoulders and put the mistletoe underneath the door!  
(Lelouch climbs up on Suzaku's shoulders.)  
Lelouch: Stop moving around so much.  
Suzaku: Sorry your shoes are hurting me…  
Lelouch: There…  
(Arthur, the cat, at that time comes around the corner and purrs and rubs up against Suzaku, tickling him.)  
Suzaku: Someone...haha! ... Hurry up... HeheHAAAA! And get the cat!  
(Before any one can reach the cat Suzaku is at his limit and falls. Him and Lelouch come crashing down.)  
Kallen: Look! They're both under the mistletoe.  
(Lelouch and Suzaku jump up and run from out underneath the mistletoe)  
Lelocuh and Suzaku: NO WAY!_

_  
(LATER THAT DAY)_

_  
Jordan:(Skipping down the stairs with a box)(singing) Deck the halls with... Oh, Suzaku! (Runs up to him and puts a Santa Claus hat on him, which she pulled out of the box)  
Suzaku: What's this? (Points to the hat)  
Jordan: We're going to take a Christmas card picture. Your Santa, Me, Kallen, C.C, and Ash are all elves.  
Suzaku: Then what is Lelouch?  
(At this moment, Lelouch comes running down the stairs in antlers and a bright red nose that blinks with Ash behind him mumbling "Why'd you put this on me?")  
Lelouch: How come he's Santa!?  
Ashleigh: 'Cause you're Rudolph!  
(Jordan hands all the girls their elf outfits and takes the camera out)  
_  
Jordan: Okay, everybody, get together! (Sets the camera's timer and runs to the group of people) Say cookie!  
(Everyone says 'Cookie' some happily, some depressingly, some angrily, and some cheerfully. C.C. actually says 'Cheese')  
Jordan: (Looks through her camera) Okay, it looks good enough!  
(In the picture, from left to right. Jordan: Smiling happily- almost crazily. Kallen: Looks like she's smiling because she doesn't know what else to do. Suzaku: A move-star smile. The end of the Santa hat almost covers one of his eyes. C.C: Smiles happily with a pizza slice in her hand. Lelouch: Classic Lulu angry/bored look. Ashleigh: Smiling with a Japanese-Peace-Sign.)  
C.C.: Everyone looks happy… except Lelouch…  
Lelouch: (Takes off the antlers and nose) Who could be happy wearing this outfit?  
Jordan: You could've at least tried.  
Suzaku: (Puts on the discarded antlers and nose) Hey, it blinks!  
Ashleigh: (Opens a candy-cane) Only Suzaku… Wait a minute, we forgot about Christmas ornaments for our tree!  
Kallen: We've got tinsel and lights…

_Jordan: And that's all we need! (Looks around) (Whispers something in Ash's ear)  
Ash: (Whispers something in Kallen's ear)  
Kallen: (Nods)  
(Kallen and Ash sneak up on Lelouch who was standing under the mistletoe. Kallen kisses him in the right check, and Ash kisses him on his left check.)  
Lelouch: (Turns bright red.)  
C.C: Bow Chick-a Wow-Wow!!__  
Jordan: Oh, that reminds me... I go some presents while we were at the mall.  
Ash: How does THAT remind you…?  
(Sets presents under the tree, she pulled them out of the box too.)  
Suzaku: (Runs up and grabs his and shakes it) What cha get me!?  
Jordan: Not telling!  
Nunnally: (Comes in through the hallway door carrying boxes.) Here are mine too.  
(Sets them under tree)  
(By Christmas Eve the potted plant, excuse us, Christmas tree is filled up with presents)  
Nunnally: Why don't we do the tradition where we open just one present tonight?  
Everyone: OK!  
Jordan: Here Lulu this is from me!  
Lelouch: (Opens present) Thank you its a... lock?  
Jordan: For your cape... and Ash here's mine to you!  
Ash: (Opens) A lock pick??  
Jordan: (Winks)  
Ash: Oh, I get it…  
Lelocuh: Here, Nunnally this is from me.  
Nunnally: (Opens) Oh, thank you Lelouch!  
Lelouch: I hope the dress suits you.  
Kallen: Here's mine Suzaku...  
Suzaku: (Opens) wha? You got me underwear?  
Kallen: Well I figured after your unicorn accident...  
(Suzaku runs over and covers her mouth with his hand)  
Suzaku: No need to talk about that anymore got it!?  
Kallen: (Shakes her head yes)_

Ash: Okay, Suzaku, here's yours! (Hands him a present)  
Suzaku: (Opens it) What is it…?  
Ash: It's a key-lock box! You put your keys in it and open it with a password. (Hands Jordan a box) Here you go, Jordy.  
Jordan: (Opens her box) YAY!! GIANT BAG OF SKITTLES!! And… this?  
Ash: (Whispers in her ear) Shh, it's the remote to Suzaku's lock box… I didn't say a code was the only way to open it…  
Jordan: C.C we got you something too!  
C.C.: Really? What?  
Jordan and Ash: (Give her a tiny card) Here! From us both!  
C.C.: (Opens it) A… Pizza Hut gift card?? Thank you!!  
Ash: I almost forgot you, Lulu. (Hands him a box) I had to get it yesterday or it wouldn't work.  
Lelouch: What? (Opens it) You got me a cookie cake?  
Jordan and Suzaku: (Laugh under their breath)  
Lelouch: And why does it say "Over the Hill" on it?  
Ash: That's the only one they had left!  
(Everyone continues to exchanges presents until there's only a tiny box left under the tree)  
Jordan: Oh, look, Lelouch it's to you from Suzaku! (Hands Lulu the box)  
Suzaku: What? I didn- (Ashleigh suddenly covers his mouth with her hand)  
Ash: What is it, Lulu?  
Lelouch: It's a… you've got to be kidding me…  
Kallen: Well? What is it?  
Lelouch: It's a… a…  
Jordan: (Grabs the box out of his hands because Ashleigh's too busy keeping Suzaku quiet) Aw! It's a heart-locket! Look it even has their pictures inside!  
Kallen: (Gets up) Let me see! Let me see!  
Ash: (Suddenly) OW! HE BIT ME! (Grabs her hand)  
Suzaku: (A little red) I NEVER BOUGHT THAT! YOU'RE LYING!  
Ash: (Hits him) WHY'D YOU BITE ME!?  
Suzaku: IT'S NOT LIKE LICKING YOUR HAND DID ANY GOOD!  
Lelouch: (Still at a loss for words)

_Jordan: Now we have to set out milk and cookies for Santa!  
Suzaku: Oh, cookies!  
Nunnally: Silly, those aren't for you.  
C.C: Yeah, they're for Santa.  
Suzaku: But I was Santa in the picture…  
Kallen and Lelouch: NO!  
(Later on that night, while everyone was asleep in their beds)  
(THUMP!)  
Jordan:(Jumps out of bed) Huh what was that!?  
(She runs into Ash's room)  
Jordan: Ash wake up! I heard a thump on the roof!  
Ash: Do you think it was Santa?  
Jordan: Only one way to find out… Let's go!  
(They run up the staircase that takes you to the roof. Before they can even get their hands on the doorknob, Lulu stops them.)  
Lelouch: What are you doing up this late!?  
Jordan: I heard a thump on the roof…  
Ash: We thought it was Santa…??  
Lelouch: Look I'll tell you a secret since you already seem to know everything anyway... It's not Santa it's the terrorists.  
Ash: Why are there terrorists in the roof?  
Jordan:(Tilts her head to the side) Terrorists are bringing our presents?  
Lelouch: No, they're here to kidnap Kallen and go on a mission._

Jordan: On Christmas Eve?!  
Ash: What're they gonna do? Put coal in all the Britannian's stockings?  
Lelouch: You don't need to know the details. Now go back to sleep.  
Jordan: (Gasp) You're gonna steal Christmas aren't you, Lu-  
Lelouch: (Forces them down the stairs) Go! (Shuts the door behind them and locks it)  
Ash: What a grinch…  
Jordan: I wanted to know what they were gonna do…  
Ash: Probably the same-old shtick…  
Jordan: I wonder if it's the Black Knights…  
Ash: If it is, I don't know where Lelouch thinks he's going, I've got his cape.  
(As if on cue, Lelouch comes out of the door behind them)  
Lelouch: Where's my cape?  
Ash: Bah, humbug.  
Lelouch: What?  
Jordan: That's her way of saying 'No way, Lulu!'  
Lelouch: I can't go without it. If I don't have it the helmet makes me look un-proportional.  
Jordan: I can see that.  
Lelouch: Just give it to me!  
Ash: On one condition…  
Lelouch: … No! Not that.  
Ash: Okay, suit yourself.  
Jordan: (Nods) Yep. Melon-head.  
Ash: A cliché that's allowed under the circumstances…  
Lelouch: … Fine, you can go! Just go to my room and get some Black Knight uniforms…  
Ash: Oh, don't worry about those I've got some stashed with the cape!  
Lelouch: Okay… Wait… What?

_(They run into the room to change into Black Knight outfits)  
Lelouch: If you guys don't hurry up I'm gonna be late…  
Ash: Go without us.  
Jordan: C.C will show us the way.  
C.C: Go, Lelouch.  
...(Later on, at the Black Knights meeting)...  
Lelouch: We have new equipment arriving soon, then we can start our attacks again...and with the help of the Japanese-  
(Out of no where Ash and Jordan appear beside him in Black knight dresses, capes, and masks. They are in the usual superhero stance. Legs apart, hands on hips, serious faces.)  
Lelouch: -forces I think we can win another-  
Kallen: Zero!  
Lelouch: What is it kallen!?  
Kallen: Look behind you...  
(Lelouch turns around to see Ash and Jordan beside him)  
Lelouch: (Quietly) Why the hell do you guys look like super heroes!?  
Jordan: Cause I'm gonna learn to fly!  
Ash: Jordy, you can't fly.  
Jordan: Awww…  
C.C: She can try jumping off the roof…  
Lelouch: Fine whatever just let me get back to business...  
(All the black knights aren't listening they're to busy trying to figure out who the freak are those two referring to Jordan and Ash are.)  
Lelouch: So that's why- (Stands up and looks very powerful!)  
(Boom Boom clap!)(Boom boom clap)  
Lelouch: (Turns around to find Ash, Jordan, And C.C making the noise) What are you doing!?  
Ash: We made a theme song!  
(Boom boom clap!)_

(Lelouch shakes his head as Ashleigh, Jordan, and C.C. continue to stomp their feet and clap their hands like vigilante cheerleaders.)  
Random Terrorist #1: You know, with those girls up there, Zero's kindda lost his intimidating aura…  
Random Terrorist #2: I see what you mean…  
Lelouch: (Angrily) Quiet!!  
C.C., Jordan, and Ashleigh: (Quickly return to their Superhero Stance and stare straight ahead like they're in the military)  
Random Terrorist #1: Never mind…  
Lelouch: Listen! When the new Knightmares arrive, we have to watch out for the Britannian militia. They've been looking for our hideout for… (Keeps going on… and on…)  
Jordan: (Thinking) Oh my gosh… I wouldn't have agreed to come if I knew he was going to be this boring!  
Ash: (Also thinking) Sheesh, he's long-winded…  
Kallen: (Thinking…) The way Zero fights with those girls behind him… I feel like I've seen it before somewhere…  
C.C.: Gosh, I'd wish he'd hurry up. Pizza Hut said it would be thirty minutes…  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Whisper) C.C… you're thinking out-loud!  
C.C.: It's easy to guess what I'm thinking… (Sigh)  
Lelouch: … Dismissed.  
(All the Black Knights below disperse)  
Lelouch: (Whips around) You're a liability! Do you know how much you can hurt my image with your messing arou-  
Jordan: (Yawns)  
C.C.: What she said. I've got a pizza to get. (Walks away)  
Lelouch: It's four in the morning!  
Jordan: I'm sleepy… Can we go home now?  
Ash: I want a Hazelnut Iced Coffee…  
(Jordan and Ashleigh walk away)  
Lelouch: (Looks around and throws his hands in the air) What the hell just happened?

_(Back at the clubhouse, everyone snuggled in their beds with hopes that St. Nick would soon be there… Okay, who are we kidding its four in the morning. He's already been here and gotten his ass out of this nut house.)_

_(Jordan and Ash burst into the room)  
Jordan: C.C! C.C! Its time to wake up, its Christmas morning!  
(Ash jumps on top of Lulu)  
Ash: WAKE UP CALL!  
Lelouch: Ah! Get off of me!  
(Ash and Jordan go running out of the room screaming to wake everyone else up)  
Ash: Oh yeah, Jordy I forgot to tell you...Your straightener is under your mattress!  
Jordan: YOU'RE THE REASON I LOOK LIKE THIS!? (Points to hair)  
Lelouch: Welcome to my world…  
Suzaku: (Slides down the banister) MERRY CHRISTMAS! Let's go see what Santa brought us!  
(They all run into living room)  
Jordan: I got a fairy wand with wings and pixie dust!  
Ash: I got a bell that goes 'Ching-Ching!!'  
Suzaku: Nun chucks!  
Nunnally: Origami paper!  
C.C: I got a dresser to put my clothes in.  
Lelouch: Finally. Now I can get my stuff out from underneath the bed.  
Ash: Hey, Lulu what did you get?  
Lelouch: I don't want to tell you.  
Suzaku: Come on Lelouch. Tell us!  
Lelouch: NO!  
C.C: Don't make me twist your arm…  
Lelouch: Fine...I got the same thing as... Jordan...  
Jordan: (Face lights up) We can be twinkle fairies together! (She runs up stairs and runs back down) Here wear this! (Pulls a tutu down over his head and onto his hips)  
Ash: HAHAHA! Lulu's wearing a tutu... Ha, Lulu's wearing a tutu!  
(Suzaku and C.C join in the chant for the rest of the day...while Lelouch tries to take off the tutu, but he can't because Jordan duct taped it to him.)_

END!!

XxX

**Author's Notes-** I don't really have anything to say…

_**Author's Notes-**__ We wish you a Merry Christmas! Yeah, yeah I know its July oh well It'll be December soon enough. Okay, so I'm gonna go jump off the roof in my Fairy wings. Peace!_

**Anyone else scared…?,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter:** Suzaku is God (Summary: Not so self-explanatory… but let's just leave it at that.)


	5. Suzaku is God

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Tuxedo Mask… or the CaramellDansen…**

**Author's Notes- **At last! I've been waiting for this chapter! We say 'Oh my god!' so much and I've always wanted to edit it… now I can!

This chapter takes place through New Years, since the last chapter was Christmas. All the clothes in this chapter were designed in the mind of Jordan!

_**Author's Notes-**__ This will be the most random chapter you have ever read…!!_

xXx

(December 31… 9:00 A.M.)

At the Clubhouse…

(Suzaku slowly wakes up and tries to figure out why he spent the night in the clubhouse…)  
Suzaku: (Opens his eyes to a face approx. three inches from his)  
Jordan: Good morning Pretty Green Eyes!!  
Suzaku: (Shouts, reels backwards, and falls off the other side of the bed) Wh- what are you doing!?  
Jordan: (Now bouncing on the bed) Guess what today is!  
Suzaku: (Still in shock)  
Jordan: It's New Years Eve! We're going to PARTY… and stay up ALL NIGHT… and get SLOSHED… No wait… scratch the last one… but it's gonna be FUN! So rise and shine!! (She quickly leaves)

(A few minutes later…)

Downstairs…

Suzaku: (Walks into the kitchen, his heart still racing)  
Lelouch: (Looks up from his cereal) You look like crap.  
Suzaku: (Fake laughs) … did you… have a very… frightening experience this morning?  
Lelouch: …?  
Suzaku: I mean did you wake up with a girl RIGHT in your face yelling 'Good Morning!'?  
Lelouch: (Goes back to his cereal) Are you kidding? I had two of them pulling the covers off of me yelling 'Ohayo!'…

_(Out of nowhere…)  
Ash: Stop complaining! Here! We have your outfits for tonight!  
Lelouch: (mouth full of cereal) What's tonight?  
Suzaku: Apparently we're going to a party for New Years Eve…  
Jordan: Yep! We all have our dresses except for you two…  
Lelouch: We're not wearing dresses!  
Jordan: Of course, of course… I meant outfits...Would you like to take a look?  
Suzaku: What could it hurt?  
(Suzaku and Lelouch open the bags and look inside, they bring their heads out of the bags and look at each other.)_

_  
(LATER THAT DAY)  
Ash: Hey, I laid our dresses in our rooms. Go try 'em on and make sure they fit!  
Jordan: Umm… Ash? Why is mine white?  
Ash: Oops! I got yours and C.C's mixed up!  
Jordan: Hmmmm… I'm gonna go play around in this for a while...  
C.C: (Shouts from upstairs) Gah! My dress is Turquoise!_

_  
(Later that Night)  
C.C: (Now wearing her long white dress)  
Jordan: (Wearing her mini turquoise cocktail dress)  
Ash: (Wearing her long black and white strapless "vampire" looking dress)  
Kallen:(Wearing her long fuchsia dress with a slit down the side)  
Milly:(Wearing a purple gown)  
All the girls: Hurry up!  
Suzaku: (Walks down in a dashing tuxedo and turns around) How do I look?  
Milly: Movie-star-ish...  
Kallen: Lelouch, hurry up!  
Lelouch:(Walks down in another dashing tuxedo except for his has a hint of burgundy) And I look…?  
Jordan: Good! Now let's go!  
Lelouch: Wait, why was there a white mask along with my tuxedo?  
Ash: I wanted to dress you like Tuxedo Mask! Here's your cane and top hat! (Hands them to him…)  
Lelouch: I think I'll pass... (Lays the items on the table)  
Suzaku: (Picks up pimp cane) I'll take this..._

(Everyone goes to the party)

All the girls: (Look at the decorations)  
Suzaku and Lelouch: (Feel really suave in their suits and stand off to the side somewhere, looking like mannequins in the window of a Menswear Boutique.)  
Ash: (Pokes Jordan and points to Suzaku and Lelouch) Looks like the tuxedos went to their heads…  
Jordan: (Nods) They're acting like models…  
C.C.: (Gets an idea) (Walks over to Lelouch and grabs his wrist, dragging him away from the wall) Come on, Lelouch, we're dancing.  
Lelouch: (Shocked) What!? But I don't know-  
C.C.: (Suddenly faces him) Dance.  
(Lelouch dumbly tries to figure out how he's supposed to position his hands. C.C. eventually does it for him. They stiffly (and ashamedly) start the box step.)  
Kallen: That looks awkward…  
Milly: (With a glass of punch in her hand) Aha! Can you believe it? Our Lulu couldn't dance! Who knew?  
Suzaku: (Looks down) Why does Lelouch get to dance?  
Jordan: (Pokes him) Don't worry Pretty Green Eyes! We'll dance with you! (Drags him off)  
Ash: We? (Tries to run but gets dragged too)  
(They start the strange Ring Around the Rosy dance like the one seen in Vampire Knight and Death Note.) :(I couldn't think of another way to explain it… There's a link to a picture of the Death Note reference if you still don't get it.):  
(Kallen and Milly eventually join too)

(Back with the first two…)

C.C.: You're a terrible dancer.  
Lelouch: You're brutally honest.  
C.C.: (Flinches) That's the third time you've stepped on my foot.  
Lelouch: Then don't ask me to dance with you.  
C.C.: (Gives up and joins the others in the circle)  
Lelouch: (Sees Suzaku dancing with five girls at the same time) … Good lord…

_(Music stops and changes songs)  
(Lelouch goes to get punch)  
Lelouch: Hm, I wonder when I should get the next black knight meeting started… That new equipment has to be here soon...(blah lala)  
Jordan: Why is Lelouch talking to himself?  
Lelouch:(Turns around really fast to see that Jordan and C.C have snuck up on him.)  
C.C: Oh, don't worry he does that all the time.  
Jordan: Oh.  
Lelouch: I do not!  
C.C: Uh huh, especially when you're dressed up as Zero.  
Lelouch: Shh! Keep it down.  
Jordan: (Walks over to the DJ and whispers something in his ear.)  
(The CARAMELLDANSEN comes in at full blast)  
Jordan:(Grabs Lulu) Let's do the CaramellDansen!  
Ash: Oh, god…  
Suzaku: (Turns around) Huh? Yes?__  
Ash: Oh that's right Suzaku. You're god…  
Suzaku: Huh?  
Kallen: How is he god?_

Ash: Oh, because he can defy all known laws of physics.  
Suzaku: I can? When did I…?  
Ash: Can you do a nine-hundred-degree roundhouse kick?  
Suzaku: Well, sure but-  
Ash: Defying gravity.  
Kallen: Really? 900 degrees?  
Ash: Mid-air…  
Suzaku: Just because I can do that doesn't make me-  
Ash: If you run fast enough, can you run on the wall?  
Suzaku: That depends on-  
Ash: All known laws of physics.  
Suzaku: (Sighs) It doesn't matter if I argue or not, you're going to call me god anyway, aren't you?  
Ash: Of course.  
Jordan: (Still trying to get Lelouch to do the dreaded CaramellDansen) You're doing it wrong!  
Lelouch: I don't even want to do it!  
Suzaku: (Walks up) How do you do it?  
Jordan: It's really easy! But Lulu won't even try! (Jordan does the CaramellDansen with a big smile on her face)  
Lelouch: (Classic anime sweat drop) …  
Suzaku: (Watches her for a moment before suddenly breaking out into dance too)  
Lelouch: (Tries to walk away slowly…)  
Ash: (Covers her ears) OH MY SUZAKU!! ENOUGH WITH THE CARAMELLDANSEN!!  
(It keeps going, so in the end, she does it too)

_Suzaku: That was exhausting!  
Jordan: Yep, but so much fun!  
Lelouch: I don't understand why I had to do it also  
Jordan: Oh sure Lulu, just because you're a prince you think your God!  
Ash: Hey we just went over how Suzaku was god!  
Jordan: Laws of physics?  
Ash: Yep.  
(Trumpets join the band in the background)  
Jordan: (Gasp) Ash let's go skank!  
Kallen: Your going to dress up like hookers?  
Ash: No, it's a type of dance, and sorry Jordy, I'm still worn out…  
C.C: So who's throwing this party anyways??  
Lelouch: Some noble probably…  
Suzaku: Yeah, there are a lot of military people here too.  
Ash: Well, Jordy and I just received an invitation, right Jordy?  
Jordan: SHA-BOING!  
(Everyone stares at her)  
Jordan: What? You guys are the ones that gave me caffeine. You should know better than that.  
Ash: (Whispers in C.C's ear) Don't worry, she'll be exhausted by three.  
Suzaku: Look, the countdown's starting!_

Everyone in the room: (Counts down from 10) … three… two… one… ZERO!  
Lelouch: (Looks over his shoulder for a second before realizing where he is)

(After midnight, the party winds down and everyone goes back to the clubhouse- save Milly and Kallen, who wanted to go to sleep.)  
C.C.: (Stumbles into the clubhouse and collapses on the couch) Tired… need… pizza…  
Jordan: (Walks in, pulling on Suzaku's sleeve) Common! Just one more time!  
Suzaku: No, I don't want to do the CaramellDansen anymore!  
Jordan: No fun… Ashleigh, make him do it!  
Ash: Jordan. If I was him, I would've killed you five minutes ago…  
Jordan: No you wouldn't have 'cause ya love me!  
Lelouch: (Pulls on his collar) Can we get out of these suits now…?  
Ash: No one's stopping you… (Pokes C.C.) C.C, aren't you going to change? … C.C?  
C.C.: (Dead asleep)  
(Everyone but C.C. changes out of the uncomfortable clothes)  
Jordan, Ashleigh, Lelouch, and Suzaku: (Sit on the floor with their backs against the couch because C.C's taken up the entire thing)  
Suzaku: What now?  
Jordan: (Still hyper- perks up) Movie?  
Ash: What movie…?  
Jordan: A scary one!  
Ash: Okay, sure… they're usually more funny than scary anyway.  
Suzaku and Lelouch: (Look at each other)  
Jordan: (Looking over the cover of the DVD) Wow, the murderer in this movie looks like Lelouch…  
Ashleigh and Suzaku: (Start laughing)  
Lelouch: (Gives Jordan a dark look)  
Jordan: (Backs up) Um… Pretty Green Eyes, can I sit next to you?

(They start the movie…)  
Ashleigh: (Keeps laughing at all the parts that are supposed to be scary)  
Jordan: (Grabs Suzaku's arm because she keeps thinking of the murderer and Lulu being the same person)  
Suzaku: (Tries not to laugh and pats her on the head) It's okay…  
Lelouch: (Turns on his side and tries to sleep)

(A few hours later…)

(The movie's off and everyone's asleep on the floor by the TV.)  
C.C: (Stirs on the couch) What happened…? (Peeks over the couch and grins) (Sneaks off to get a camera and snaps a picture before going back to sleep)

(Morning!!)

C.C: (Bursts in with a pizza box in hand) Breakfast pizza! Everyone up!  
Lelouch and Suzaku: (Slowly get up and follow C.C into the kitchen)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Look at each other)  
Ash: You think it's worth it…?  
Jordan: I want waffles…  
(They reluctantly get up and go into the kitchen as well)

(Everyone is normally eating their breakfast when C.C. stands and holds up a piece of paper.)  
C.C: I saw something interesting last night…  
Jordan: What?  
C.C: (Flips the paper over to show the picture she took) (Points to Jordan practically squeezing the life out of Suzaku's arm. His hand is white from the obvious lack of circulation.) This is cute, but the other two are better. (Points to Ashleigh and Lelouch. Each has one hand on the other's face, pushing their head back- Ashleigh has her other hand clutching Lelouch's collar and his hand on her wrist, with her knee in his abdomen.) They look like they're trying to kill each other…  
Suzaku: (Looks at his hand) I was wondering why my hand was so cold this morning…

_Jordan: Sorry Pretty Green Eyes.  
Ash: Yeah just pop it in the microwave at it'll be fine.  
Suzaku: I'm not that stupid!  
Jordan: My tummy hurts!  
C.C: Probably from all the caffeine and sweets.  
Lelouch: Question... Why do you act like a three year old??  
Jordan: Cause Peter Pan's my idol.  
Lelouch: What?  
Ash: She doesn't want to grow up.  
Suzaku: So, she's basically a three-year-old in a sixteen-year-old's body?  
Ash: Yep! (Smiles)  
(Milly and Kallen walk in)  
Suzaku: (Over in the corner flexing his hand trying to warm it up)  
Milly:(Looks over at Suzaku) Suzaku, what happen to your hand?  
C.C: (Shows them the picture)  
Milly: Oh… (Not to sure what she should say, and a tiny bit frightened by it)  
Kallen: (Thinking) Brilliant child…_

_  
(Later that day…)_

Ashleigh: (Sneaking around upstairs.) (Looks around) … no one's up here… (Quickly runs into a room and starts looking through it.) Where is it this time?? (Pulls out Zero's cape.) Found it! (Turns to leave but something catches her eye.) What the-?

Downstairs…

Suzaku and Lelouch: (Sitting down, reading, doing work… whatever it is they do.)  
Jordan: (Walks in) Hey, guys have you seen Ashleigh?  
(Both of them shake their heads 'No'.)  
Suzaku: Is she not with you?  
Jordan: No, I haven't seen her for a while.  
Lelouch: (Stands up) My cape!  
Ashleigh: (From upstairs) LELOUCH!!  
Everyone: (Flinches)  
Lelouch: What? SHE'S mad at ME??  
Ashleigh: (Runs down the stairs wearing Zero's cape but has an exact copy of it in her hands.) What the hell!? You have TWO of them!?  
Jordan: Wow…  
Lelouch: Of course! Why wouldn't I?  
Ashleigh: (Throws one at him) Then why the hell do you always take this one BACK!?  
C.C.: (Walks into the room and looks at everyone.) Oh, she found the other one, did she?

Owari! (End)

XxX

**Author's Notes-** In reality I am mad that he has more than one cape. It wasn't fair to the world in the first place that he had that cape… now he has TWO of them!?

Here's the link I was talking about. It's not from my photobucket, but it was looked for and found on a whim to make it easier for you to picture the dance.  
i276(dot)photobucket(dot)com(slash)albums(slash)kk1(slash)meh-wurld(slash)lulz(dot)jpg

Also, if you don't know what the CaramellDansen is… it's sad that you don't. This also isn't my photobucket.  
i165(dot)photobucket(dot)com(slash)albums(slash)u63(slash)mcrluver25(slash)Caramelldansen(underscore)(underscore)Suzaku(underscore)Lelouch(underscore)by(underscore)h(dot)gif

_**Author's Notes-**Gimmie caffeine and you're my best friend forever... Oh yeah, by the way you guys, we just realized we never put Shirley in our chapters. So, if any one has a problem with this please tell us and I'll at least try to fit her in…_

**I don't care, but that's just me, **

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter: **Six Flags! (Summary: The theme park- not six actual flags… We're just mutilating the characters, aren't we? Haha!)


	6. Six Flags!

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Six Flags…**

**Author's Notes- **This chapter was really hard to write!! Ahhh!! (…The veteran has a breakdown…)

_**Author's Notes-**__ Thank you Electric Eclectic for the caffeine new bestie, and we had originally planed for Rivalz to be in this, he will appear in Chapter 8, as for Shirley, you might not like what we did to her... but At least I fit her in!_

xXx

_(One fine spring day…)_

_  
(Suzaku walks through the clubhouse door)  
Suzaku: Hey guys, what's up?  
(Jordan, Ash, Lelouch, C.C, and Kallen are all sitting around bored.)  
C.C: Life is so dull…  
Jordan: We have nothing to do Pretty Green Eyes…  
Lelouch: They've rejected all my ideas.  
Suzaku: Well, how about we turn on some music or something…  
(Suzaku walks over to the stereo. As he's walking Jordan hears something jingling in his pockets.)  
Jordan: Hey Suzaku, are there keys in you pocket?  
Suzaku: Huh? Oh yeah, I just got the Lancelot from Lloyd. (Pulls keys out of his pocket and shows them to her.)  
Jordan: THATS IT! (Grabs keys and runs outside)  
Suzaku: Hey! (Runs after her)  
(Everyone else follows)  
Jordan: Kay, everyone get in! We're going to Six Flags!  
Ash: Jordy… you should ask Suzaku before you take his keys…  
Suzaku: Fine, we'll take the Lancelot to Six Flags but I'M DRIVING!  
Jordan: (Crosses arms) Fine.  
Kallen: Hey, Suzaku how many people does the Lancelot hold?  
Suzaku: Umm, five... oh… crap.  
Jordan: I have another idea! (Runs into clubhouse come out with a rope and her roller blades on) Lelouch, hook this up to the back! (Throws him the rope)  
Lelouch: Ok… (Climbs on to and hooks the rope)  
Ash: Jordy, are gonna be ok like that?  
Jordan: Of course now lets go!  
(Amazingly Jordan does not fall all the way to Six Flags but...)  
C.C: Umm… Suzaku, aren't we going a little to fast to find a parking spot?  
Suzaku: Yeah guess. I'll have to slam on the emergency break... (Pushes the big red button)  
(Just as he pushes the button and they stop, the next thing they see is Jordan flying over the Lancelot.)  
Everyone: JORDAN!  
(They all run out of the Lancelot to find Jordan landed on the pavement completely unharmed)  
Ash: Oh my Suzaku, Jordy I'm glad you're not hurt… HOW are you not hurt?  
Jordan: Hey, Suzaku isn't the only one with magical powers!  
Lelouch: I'll go get the tickets…  
(They enter the gates to Six Flags)_

Everyone: (Looks around)  
Suzaku: There are a lot of arcade games around here…  
Ashleigh: (Points at a random- giant- roller coaster) We're definitely riding THAT!  
Jordan: (Looks panicked) No! No! No roller coasters!  
Ashleigh: What's the point in coming to a theme park if you don't ride the roller coasters?  
Jordan: Not everyone likes roller coasters, right!? (Looks at the others)  
Kallen: They're pretty fun…  
Lelouch: I don't care.  
Suzaku: I like them, I guess, just… not too crazy…  
C.C.: (Points and shakes someone) Look at the size of that pizza place!  
Kallen: I don't think we should eat first…  
Suzaku: (Looks sick already) Definitely no…  
Jordan: Why don't we start with something light? Like… Bumper Cars… or the arcade!  
C.C.: What's in the arcade…?  
Kallen: I bet they have DDR.  
Suzaku: DDR…  
Ashleigh: Dance Dance Revolution!  
All the girls: (Look at each other and drag the other two to the arcade building)  
Kallen and C.C: (Push Suzaku and Lelouch onto the little plastic stage)  
Lelouch: Hold on a minute! What are you doing?!  
Ashleigh: (Puts some quarters into the machine)  
Suzaku: Wait- I don't even know how to-  
Jordan: (Picks out a song) Ta-dah! Milkshake (The Rock Version) by Goodnight Nurse!  
Suzaku and Lelouch: The what?  
(The music starts and they just stand there)  
Kallen: You have to step on the arrows like the screen tells you to!  
Suzaku: (Tries it… gets it right so he starts getting into it) This isn't so hard.  
Lelouch: (Steps on the same button over and over) …  
Jordan: You're not even trying!  
Ashleigh: Because he knows he's not graceful like God over there… (Points at Suzaku- who's screen reads 'PERFECT' all over it.)  
Lelouch: (Starts to actually try a little to prove he can do it… but loses anyway)  
(C.C. and Kallen take next. Kallen, having done it before, is pretty good, but C.C., with her random technological abilities, wins by just a little. Jordan and Ashleigh attempt it but are about on the same level and Suzaku and Lelouch because they have never actually done it before…)

_Jordan: See, cheap thrills can be fun, Ash.  
Ash: (Off in lala land staring at the roller coaster)  
Suzaku: (Singing) My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard...  
Lelouch: We should have chosen a different song.  
Kallen: I had fun.  
Jordan: (Stares at a balloon seller and trails off from the group)  
(Jordan stands there and looks at the balloons very intensely)  
(The rest walk over)  
Ash: Jordan... Umm... do you want a balloon??  
Jordan: (Shakes head no)  
C.C: I want the lime green one. (Tugging on lulus sleeve)  
(The balloon guy gives it to her while Lelouch pays)  
Jordan: (Looks at the safety pin on Ash's pants and points to it)  
Kallen: She wants that thing on your pants…  
Ash: Oh, here… (Hands her the safety pin)  
Jordan: (Holding safety pin tight in hands still looking at the balloons intensely.)  
Suzaku: Come on you guys, let's go do something. Standing here is boring…  
(All of a sudden Jordan throws the safety pin at the middle balloon, popping it, and causing all the other balloons to pop as well.)  
Lelouch: Oh shit- run! (Grabs a handful of small bills and throws it behind him while he runs) Sorry!  
(They all run into the closet shop while the balloon salesmen is behind them yelling and waving his fist like a mad man.)  
Ash: My Suzaku! Jordy we haven't even been here for 45 minutes and you already cause us trouble…  
Jordan: Sorry! I just had too!  
C.C: Lelouch, what was up with all that money?  
Ash: I think Lulu is better at DDR than he lets on...  
Lelouch: Shut up._

Suzaku: Okay, we need a dark place to hide for a while…  
(Everyone scans the area…)  
Ash: (Points) Laser Tag! It's dark, we'll be hidden, and it'll give us the chance to go all militia on their asses!  
Lelouch: Fine, let's just go before they throw us out of here!  
(They all run to the Laser Tag and slip inside)  
Jordan: (Bounces up and down) I call Pretty Green Eyes and C.C!  
C.C.: Can we be the Green Team?  
Jordan: Of course!  
(Suit up…)  
Suzaku: These outfits aren't too realistic…  
Jordan: Who cares!  
C.C.: (Keeps shooting the wall to make the red dot appear)  
Kallen: (Fiddling with the Laser Gun) Déjà vu…  
Ash: (Turns to the other two) Guys… Let's kick their asses.  
Lelouch and Kallen: (Nod like it's actually a war zone)

_Suzaku: (Looks over to find Ash, Lulu, and Kallen in a huddle) Ok… So, they seriously have something planned… We'll need a counter attack. (Looks over a C.C., still shooting at the wall) We'll, she's obviously out of it… So it looks like it's just me and you, Jordan.  
Jordan: Leave it to me. Hey C.C., if you shoot Kallen as many times as possible I'll buy you two... no three extra large pizzas!  
C.C: Extra cheese?  
Suzaku: Sure any toppings you want!  
C.C: Okay! (Runs off into the dark to find Kallen)  
Suzaku: Now what to do about Lelouch…  
Jordan: I have that covered too! Just follow me!  
(Jordan and Suzaku sneak up on Lelouch)  
Lelouch: (thinking) Damn, I need my cape, I feel naked with out it…  
Jordan: Hey Lulu! (Runs up to him)  
Lelouch: Wha! (Shoots her)  
Jordan: (Keeps coming toward him)  
Lelouch: Baka! You're supposed to run away!  
Jordan: But I want to ask you something.  
Lelocuh: What?  
Jordan: Nothing… Just wanted to tell you: TICKLE TICKLE!  
Lelouch: Wha...(Jordan tackles him down to the ground tickling him) Hahahahahahahahaha staaa...hahaha… oooop!  
(At this time, Suzaku runs up and starts shooting at Lelouch as much as he can)  
(Ash runs around the corner to see what's happening)  
Ash: LULU! USE GEASS!  
Lelouch: (Uses geass on Jordan as told) I command you to stop tickling me!  
Jordan: (Stands up in a daze)  
Suzaku: (Stares at her confused) Huh?  
(Ash and Lulu tag team and start shooting at Suzaku and Jordan)  
Suzaku: Jordan! Snap out of it! (Grabs her and runs behind a blockade) Jordan, shiny things!__  
Jordan: (Immediately snaps out of it) Where!?_

_(Meanwhile, C.C. goes all Mission Impossible on Kallen's ass.)_

Kallen: (Sneaking around in the dark) (Whispers to herself) I hear Suzaku and Jordan's voices… but not-(C.C. suddenly leaps off of a tall blockade: Spinning, flipping, and shooting at Kallen all at the same time.)  
Kallen: (Startled) What? (Tries shooting C.C but she's too fast)  
C.C.: (Lands on her feet in front of Kallen. Whips around, still firing.)  
Kallen: (Dives behind a wall) Dammit!

(Suzaku and Jordan eventually fall back to regroup)  
Ash: (Smacks Lelouch on the back of the head)  
Lelouch: What was that for!?  
Ash: For letting Jordan overtake you!  
Lelouch: She was tickling me! You'd be incapacitated too if she was doing it to you!  
Ash: No, when you poke ME I spazz out and my arms go flailing. I'm carrying a heavy plastic gun. Jordan's not suicidal.  
Lelouch: … really?  
Ash: Don't even think about it! YOU are going to poke Jordan- now go! (Shoves him towards enemy territory)  
Lelouch: What? Why me!?  
Ash: Because Jordan's not going to tickle you anymore and besides, I have to go find Kallen!  
(Ash runs off to find Kallen)  
Lelouch: (Stands there) … What!? (Walks to find Jordan anyway)  
Jordan: (Pops out in front of him suddenly) Ha! (Shoots him)  
Lelouch: (Thinks about it for a moment before reaching out and poking her side with his gun)  
Jordan: (Screams, jumps, and throws her hands into the air- dropping her gun.)  
Lelouch: It worked! (Steps on her gun and shoots her multiple times)  
Jordan: (Tries to block the laser) PRETTY GREEN EYES!!  
(Suzaku comes running from somewhere)  
Suzaku: What's wrong!? (Hears his censors going off and looks around)  
(Kallen and Ash are on top of a blockade, their guns pointed at Suzaku. They high-five.)  
Suzaku: (Fires up) Not fair! How'd you get up there!?  
Ash: We flew!  
Kallen: (Jumps down and charges at Suzaku)  
(The two start dodging and shooting at each other like it's a real war)  
Jordan: (Steps on Lulu's foot) Give me back my gun!  
Lelouch: (Falls backwards and fires) Ow!

_(BUZZER GOES OFF!!)  
Everyone: (Stares at the big red buzzer flashing on the wall)  
Kallen: Guess that means our time is up…  
(Everyone removes gear and walks outside)  
Jordan: Ah, its bright as crap out here! (Pops out this huge freakin pair of sunglasses)  
Ash: So, can we please go on the roller coaster now!! (Puts her hands together like she's praying)  
C.C: Sounds fun.  
(As everyone moves forward Jordan stands still shaking-yes like a freakin Chihuahua)  
Suzaku: Umm guys, how about we go on a small one?  
Ash: Fine. (Grabs Jordan and runs)  
Jordan: Ummmm... uhhh… How small is small??  
Ash: Like that! (Points to a simple looking rollercoaster)  
(Everyone gets on and it starts going up hill)  
(Just as its going down hill the small looking rollercoaster turns into this huge-ass rollercoaster and a big loopty-loop)  
Jordan: My sunglasses!! (They go falling toward the ground and shatter)  
Kallen: AAAAAAHHHH! (Wind blowing mouth back)  
Ash: Weeeeeeeee!! (Hand numb from Jordan squeezing it so hard)  
Suzaku: Waaaahhhh (Hands above his head)  
Lelouch: AAAAAAHHHH! (Loose coins fall from his pockets)  
C.C.: Weeee! (EXPRESIONLESS FACE)  
(All get off rollercoaster)  
Jordan: (Crying) My sunglasses!  
Ash: Aw, Jordy, I'm sorry I thought it was a small rollercoaster…  
Kallen: Hey guys, carnival games.  
Jordan: (With those amazing mood swings again, immediately perks up) I want the Teddy bear! (Starts jumping up and down) Come on Pretty Green Eyes, please win it for me!! (Biggest puppy-dog-face in the world)  
Suzaku: Fine…  
C.C.: Lelouch, I want one too.  
Ash: Me too, Lulu!  
Lelouch: Fine. And… (Sarcastically) I suppose you want one too, Kallen?  
Kallen: (Evil Grin) Sure.  
Lelouch: Wait a minute… (Looks at Suzaku) How come you only have to win one and I have to win three!?  
Suzaku: 'Cause you're a lady-killer._

Lelouch: (Scoffs) Coming from the guy that was dancing with five girls at the same time during New Years.  
Suzaku: (Pays the vendor and starts playing the game) No, that's because I'm more fun.  
Ash: He's got you there.  
Lelouch: Shut up.  
Ash: (Fake cries) Pretty Green Eyes!  
Suzaku: (Hands Jordan an Orange Bear that's as big as her torso) I know, I know. I'll win yours okay?  
Ash: Yeah. Lulu will TAINT it with EVIL.  
Lelouch: Saves me the trouble.  
C.C.: Cool, now you can win me two.  
Lelouch: What?! Why!?  
C.C.: Because I want two of them.  
(Lelouch shakes his head and tries the game. Jordan and Ashleigh make their Orange and Green bears do battle. Suzaku eventually has to win all of them because Lelouch sucked at the game.)  
C.C.: Never mind, Suzaku. You don't have to win two for me.  
Suzaku: Okay.  
Lelouch: If I did it you'd have me win two of them!  
C.C.: Yes, but Suzaku's more fun.  
Lelouch: … That didn't even make sense!  
C.C.: Neither did your face. (Goes to Bear-Battle with the other three)  
Lelouch: … Neither did that! What do you mean by my- … Oh, cents, like money. Ha-ha, you're hilarious, C.C.  
Ash: (Hits Lelouch over the head with the bear and walks away as if nothing happened.)  
Lelouch: (His eye twitches) I hate this place…  
Suzaku: (Laughs)

_Suzaku: (Hands Kallen the last bear and shoves another into Lulus arms) Here. For Nunnally.  
Lelouch: Thanks.  
Jordan: Its okay Lulu, even if they all think you're not fun I think you can be. (Gives him the peace sign)  
Lelouch: (Suspicious) What are you planning…?  
Jordan: Nothing! But I want to go on a water ride next!  
(They run over to the closest water ride witch happens to be a big tube everyone gets in and goes down a huge water slide.)  
(Halfway down the ride)  
Kallen: Stop pushing you guys!  
Suzaku: It's to cramped in the raft!  
Lelouch: (At this time, while squirming around, accidentally pushes Ash out)  
Jordan: Ash!  
C.C: Lelouch, how could you!  
Lelouch: Uh-uh- but I didn't mean too!  
(They reach the bottom, Ash had to ride the rest of the way down on her butt…)  
Ash: (REALLY PISSED!) LELOUCH VI BR- LAMPEROUGE  
Lelouch: (Holding his hands out to stop her- shaking.)  
Suzaku:(Grabbing his heart from the shock of her about to call out his real name.)  
Jordan: (Hiding behind Suzaku- scared of seeing Ash that angry.)  
C.C: (Standing next to Jordan also a little afraid.)  
Kallen: (Confused)  
Ash: How dare you push me off! I will have my Revenge!  
Lelouch: But, but… I Swear I didn't mean too!  
Ash: (Walks up to him gets right in his face) R-E-V-E-N-G-E... Revenge!  
(And they all walk away. Off to the Teacups ride.)_

(Everyone gets on the Teacups ride. Jordan, Suzaku and C.C in one- Ashleigh, Kallen, and Lulu in the other.)  
Lelouch: (Nervous)  
Ash: Kallen, how are you on Motion Sickness.  
Kallen: Pretty immune, why?  
Ash: (Evil smile) Just wondering!  
(The ride starts. Suzaku and Jordan and C.C. all spin the wheel together- going fast but not incredibly fast. Ashleigh and Kallen start spinning the thing so fast you better not look up because you won't be able to look down again! The ride ends.)  
Suzaku, Jordan, and C.C.: (Unsteadily get out)  
Kallen and Ash: (Get out of the giant teacup like nothing happened)  
Lelouch: (Stumbles out like he was just shot)  
Ash: Was the spinning too much for you, Lulu?  
Lelouch: (Walks in a random direction, trying not to fall over)  
(While Lulu staggers around like a drunk, a fast-moving vendor with a tray of red and blue Slurpies suddenly crosses his path. The vendor tries to avoid him but ends up stumbling and all twelve of the coloured drinks go flying at Lelouch- knocking him over as well. He's covered in red and blue ice. Soon-to-be sticky!)  
Ash: (Helps the Vendor up and hands him Twenty dollars) Thank you very much.  
Suzaku: (Helps Lelouch up) You planned all of that??  
Ash: (Nods)  
Kallen: It's a bit elaborate don't you think?  
Jordan: What a waste of a Slurpie…  
C.C.: (Dying of laughter)  
Lelouch: (Stands up straight- a trail of blue dripping down his face from the glob of Slurpie in his hair) … What day is it...?

_Kallen: (Helps Lulu sit down)  
Suzaku: I'll go get him a towel…  
Jordan: (Stands there and salutes Lulu like the American Flag)  
C.C.: (Follows Jordan's lead)  
Ash: That's what you get for pushing me in the water!  
Lelouch: I told you it was an accident!  
Suzaku: (Runs back and hands him a towel. Looks at Jordan and C.C: still standing there)  
Kallen: Speaking of food, why don't we get some?  
Ash: Who was talking of food…?  
Kallen: I don't know, but I'm hungry.  
C.C: Pizza!  
Jordan: Can we get cotton candy!?  
Ash: No!  
Jordan: Come on! (Starts running toward the cotton candy stand)  
Ash: Grab her!  
Suzaku: (Holds Jordan's hands behind her back and drags her back. Literally drags her- she refuses to walk.)  
(They order and eat. C.C has a happy expression now)  
C.C: Why is there a huge bunny over there? (Points to the huge cartoon character walking around the park)  
Ash: Oh, he's one of the entertainers.  
Jordan: I wanna hug him! (Runs over and hugs him)  
C.C., Kallen, Ash: (All hug him too)  
Suzaku: (High-fives the bunny)  
Lelouch: (Standing in one spot with his arms crossed and still sticky from Slushy)  
(The bunny decides to cheer him up and goes and does a funny dance around him)_

Lelouch: (Eye twitch) Can we go home now?  
Bunny: (In a funny voice) What's your hurry? There are so many things to do here!  
Lelouch: Not quite.  
Bunny: Someone needs a hug!  
Lelouch: I'm not a very huggy person.  
Bunny: (In a normal voice) You and your friend are here with four girls. Common, man. Who wouldn't be-  
Lelouch: (Crazy Eye) Go entertain the fountain.  
Bunny: (Hops into the closest giant fountain and does more funny dances)  
Suzaku: (Watches the rabbit) … Either that guy's more gullible than we thought, or Lelouch has incredible persuasive skills…  
C.C.: (Munching on pizza) You don't know the half of it.  
Jordan: I'm okay with leaving… It's getting pretty late…  
Ash: Yeah, and the chances of me getting Jordan on another rollercoaster are very slim…  
Jordan: Damn right they are! You owe me a pair of sunglasses!  
(Everyone goes to the Lancelot)  
Jordan: Just let me get my rollerblades on!  
Suzaku: Wait… Sorry, Lelouch, you're riding on the back.  
Lelouch: What!? Why me!?  
Suzaku: Because I can't get Slurpie on the inside of the Lancelot. Lloyd would… well, Lloyd can't do anything to me, but I don't want to hear it.  
Jordan: (Shoves the rollerblades into Lulu's hands) Here ya go! Hey, Pretty Green Eyes, can I drive??  
Ashleigh, Kallen, and C.C.: No!  
Jordan: (Gets into the Lancelot) You guys are no fun…

_(They arrive safe at the clubhouse. Yes, even Lulu. Suzaku slowed down on the breaks so he only flew into the back of the Lancelot.)  
Lelouch: Nunnally, we're home!  
Nunnally: Welcome home big brother!  
Lelouch: Here. (Hands her the teddy bear) Suzaku won this for you.  
Suzaku: Lelouch helped too.  
Nunnally: (Giggles) Thank you both! (Kisses both on cheek)  
Kallen: Well, I better get going. It's getting late.  
C.C: I'm gonna go put my bear in my room.  
Jordan: Me too! I'm gonna name you Lulu Jr.! (Runs up stairs)  
Lelouch: (Running after her) Who the hell said you could name that stupid thing after me!?  
Ash: Well… at least this time he isn't chasing me…  
(Lulu walks back down the stairs holding a bear above his head with Jordan trying to jump up and grab it)  
Jordan: Come on Lulu, gimmie Lulu Jr. back!  
Lelouch: Change its name and I will.  
Jordan: Damn! Why do you have to be so tall  
Suzaku: He's not that tall…  
Ash: Yes he is… Watch this. (Runs and gets a tape measure, hands Jordy one end and run to the other side of the room to where there is 6 feet of tape measure showing) See, this is Lulu's leg!  
Lelouch: My legs are not that long!  
Jordan: Are too! And you have like two feet of torso!  
Lelouch: (Frustrated throws the bear down) I'm going to take a shower!  
Jordan: (Runs over to her bear) Lulu Jr.!  
Suzaku: We'll, I better get the Lancelot back to Lloyd…  
Ash: Hey Jordy, let's go make Lulu Jr. and Suzaku Jr. battle!  
Suzaku: What did you name that thing!?  
Ash: Nothing bye! (Slams door in his face)_

_  
(END)_

XxX

**Author's Notes- **Ah, I had forgotten about the tape measure… We've actually done that. I don't think I'd name the bear Suzaku Jr., because Suzaku Jr. would be the equivalent of Jesus… And- concerning my yelling (and spelling) at Lulu - Jordy, do I really talk like that…?

_**Author's Notes-**__ You guys should go find that song we made Lelouch and Suzaku dance too... It's a really good song._

**And I can **_**so**_** see Suzaku singing it,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter:** Oh, Snap! Vampires! (Summary: Lots of things happen. Rivalz and Shirley finally have a cameo, and someone's secretly a vampire...?)


	7. Oh, Snap! Vampires!

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or 300… or Sparta… or Vampire Knight… or Yu-Gi-Oh: The Abridged Series…. **

**Author's Notes-** Suzaku, I hate chapter six… Oh, well, not much I can do about that… This chapter's much better! More randomness- it's our style. I've been waiting for this chapter for over a week…

Yes, there is a teeny-tiny reference to Yu-Gi-Oh: The Abridged Series in this chapter. See if you can spot it! If you've never heard of it, you're missing what's probably the greatest thing on the internet. You don't even have to watch or used to watch the original Yu-Gi-Oh to find it hilarious. All credit to LittleKuribou and his amazing dubbing skills!

_**Author's Notes-**__ This is the funniest chapter for me, because I get to do the things I've always wanted to!_

xXx

(Late at night…)

Outside the Clubhouse…

Ashleigh and Jordan: (Struggle to put on their Black Knight uniforms)  
Jordan: I can't believe he left without us!  
Ashleigh: Just put on the jacket and let's go!  
(Both of them put on their mask/hat things and run somewhere. They fail to notice the bright orange-haired girl watching them.)  
Shirley: (Whispers to herself) Those two… are Black Knights?  
(She ingeniously decides to follow them… Go figure.)

(Halfway into the meeting/speech, Jordan and Ashleigh appear at their regular places- in the Superhero stance.)  
C.C.: (Whispers) Where have you guys been?  
Jordan: No one told us!  
(The meeting goes on like normal until…)  
Random Terrorist #1: (Bursts in) Look what we found outside!  
Random Terrorist #2: (Tosses a nervous-looking Shirley into the middle of the room)  
All of this story's Main Characters: (Thinking) Shirley??  
Random Terrorist #1: What were you doing sneaking around like that!  
Shirley: I… I just…  
Random Terrorist #2: It doesn't matter now! We have to figure out what do with her… Should we just kill her?  
Random Terrorist #1: No, we can't do that! … Can we?  
Lelouch: No, you can't kill her.  
Random Terrorist #2: Then what are we going to do?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Look at each other) Leave it to us!  
Everyone Else: What?  
(They jump down and walk towards Shirley.)  
Ashleigh: (Pulls out a gun with the words 'Bloody Rose' written on it. Aims it at Shirley.)  
Kallen: (Runs closer a bit) But we said we weren't killing her!  
Jordan: (Waves her hand at her) Don't worry! It only kills vampires! Watch!  
Ashleigh: (Fires a shot of rose-shaped energy at Shirley)  
Shirley: (Goes flying backwards, bleeding a little)  
All the other Main Characters: (Thinking) Shirley!  
Random Terrorist #2: (Runs towards Shirley and checks her vitals) She's not breathing!  
Kallen: I thought you said it only kills vampires!  
Ashleigh: It does!  
Lelouch: So does that mean…?  
Jordan: (Throws her hands in the air) OH MY SUZAKU, SHE WAS A REAL VAMP!!  
Kallen: A… vampire…?  
Lelouch: It's not possible.  
Random Terrorist #2: (Checks her pulse) But she's… dead…  
Jordan: Holy crap! What are we gonna do now?!  
C.C.: (Jumps down and walks to Shirley's corpse) Hold on. (Places her hands on Shirley's head and heart. Her hands start glowing and after a while, Shirley opens her eyes to everyone standing over her.)  
Shirley: What… just happened…?  
Ashleigh: A vampire?  
Shirley: (Shocked) How did you-?  
Jordan: (Messes with the Bloody Rose)  
Shirley: Uh… um…  
Ashleigh: You keep our secret and we'll keep yours.  
Shirley: Oh… okay…

_(Morning time!)_

_Jordan: (Stalking around the house as to be sure she doesn't run into Suzaku. As she passes the front door she stops and stares out the window)  
Jordan: Hey you guys, whose scooter is this?  
(Lelouch and Rivalz walk around the corner)  
Rivalz: Oh, that's mine  
Jordan: It sure is shiny... Can I drive it!?  
Suzaku: (Pops out from around the other corner) No! Don't let her drive any thing!  
Jordan:(Hides something behind her back) Awww Pretty Green Eyes… I'm not that bad of a driver…  
Lelouch: Jordan… what are you hiding behind your back?  
Jordan: Noooothhhing…  
Suzaku: Come on. Lets see.  
Jordan: (Very slow) Oh, its just... (Very fast) The keys to the Lancelot- bye! (She runs out of the door)  
Suzaku: Wait! Not again! (He runs after her)  
Rivalz: She does this often?  
Lelouch: Very.  
(Rivalz and Lelouch walk upstairs to study)  
(An hour later)  
(Suzaku walks in to the same room as Lelouch and Rivalz)  
Suzaku: Finally got my keys back…  
Lelouch: Where did she head off too?  
Suzaku: To find Ashleigh…  
(At this moment they hear a motor start up)  
Suzaku: Uh, if I have to keys to the Lancelot then that means...  
Rivalz: My scooter!  
(They run outside to find Jordan on the scooter and Ash in the sidecar)  
Lelouch: You guys get back here!  
(Jordan turns around and heads straight for them with out stopping. Ash stands up in the side car and pops out this huge pink umbrella in front of her like a shield)  
Ash: (Standing in battle form with the umbrella) SPARTA!  
(Lelouch, Rivalz, And Suzaku jump out of the way of the speeding scooter.)  
(Jordan stops the scooter exactly two centimeters away from the door.)  
Jordan: What did you guys think? I was going to run into ya?  
The Boys: (Still in shock)  
Jordan: I have one of these bad boys at home! (Pats the scooter) I know how to drive it.  
Rivalz: (Runs to make sure his scooter is alright)  
(The rest head back inside)_

Suzaku: What is it with you two and stealing things??  
Jordan: But Pretty Green Eyes… It's not like the Lancelot… I knew that I could drive the scooter…  
Suzaku: (Shocked and scared look) You mean you stole the Lancelot not knowing if you could drive it?  
Jordan: Uh- um… Wanna know something interesting about Shirley! She's a-  
Ashleigh: (Covers Jordan's mouth) We're sorry!  
Suzaku: (Looks confused but walks away)  
Lelouch: Speaking of Shirley… Where did you guys get that gun, anyway? You just kind of pulled it out of nowhere.  
Ashleigh: Oh, we got it from our friend Yuuki.  
Lelouch: Who is Yuuki?  
Jordan: She lives in the manga next to us!  
Lelouch: (Gives her an 'I don't believe you' look.) … Manga?  
Jordan: Yep! She lives in the Vampire Knight World.  
Lelouch: (His mind refuses to process this. So he walks away)  
Ashleigh: Why didn't you just tell him the truth that we got it from E-Bay…  
Jordan: 'Cause messing with him is too much fun!  
Ashleigh: Of course… (Looks out the window at Rivalz, still checking on this scooter.) You know, Jordy… If you would've crashed that thing I bet he would've started crying…  
Jordan: (Munches on Pocky Sticks she pulled out of nowhere) Damn, I should've at least scratched it or something then… Pocky?  
Ashleigh: Sure. (Takes a Pocky Stick)  
(They go off to do something the other main characters find to be tormenting… or be bored.)

_(Later that night)_

_Lelouch: Why the hell am I chained to this fence!?  
Ash: 'Cause last time you left without us!  
Lelouch: Because you don't need to come these things!  
Jordan: Of course we do, Lulu.  
(At this time they don't realize that Kallen is hiding around the corner.)  
Kallen: (Thinking) No way!  
(Later on at the Black Knights meeting.)__  
Zero: And that's all for tonight.  
(Jordan and Ash immediately grab the megaphone out of his hands)  
Zero: What do you think your doing?! This is why-  
Ash: Oh, shut up, Kitty.  
Terrorist: (Snicker)  
Jordan: We brought Skittles!  
Ash: And coffee!  
Jordan: For everyone so please stay and enjoy!  
Lelouch: (Walks off into the dark somewhere.)  
Kallen: (With her suspicions, follows)  
Kallen: (Thinking) Now if I can just find someway to... GOT IT! (Out Loud) HEY, LELOUCH!  
Zero: (With out thinking- turns around) Huh- …Dammit! (Smacks himself in the head)  
Kallen: (Jumping with joy) So it is you! And that means that the other two are Jordan and Ashleigh! This is great!  
(At this moment Jordan, Ash, and C.C. walk in.)  
__Kallen: (Runs up and grabs Ash's shoulders) You guys should have told me you were part of the Black Knights!  
Ash: (A little shocked and confused look)  
Jordan: (Trying to cover up) I'm a bunny rabbit! (Obviously, she failed)  
Lelouch: Its ok, she's already figured it out. Just let it go... Kallen, you can't tell anyone.  
Kallen: I'm just glad I found out everything. Now I'll never be confused again!  
Ash: Well, I wouldn't say 'never'.  
Jordan: Yeah, we still have some tricks up our sleeves!  
Kallen: (Confused)_

_(Later on that night…)_

_Jordan: (Wakes up sleepily) Food…  
(She walks down stairs to find Lulu sitting in the dark)  
Lelouch: You couldn't sleep either?  
Jordan: Food… (Opens the door to where the only light in the kitchen is coming from the refrigerator)  
(Jordan reaches in and gets a bagel. She closes the door)  
Lelouch: (Feels a tap on his shoulder -Jordan is on the other side of the room- he turns around to see a very tall figure above him) GAH!!  
Jordan: (Throws her bagel up in the air and turns around)  
Suzaku: (Flips on light switch) Calm down! It's me!  
Lelouch: My Suzaku, Suzaku! You scared the Suzaku out of me!  
Suzaku: Oh, not you too…  
Jordan: My bagel…_

Suzaku: What are you guys doing up so late?  
Jordan: (Stares at the discarded food) My bagel…  
Lelouch: (Shielding his eyes) I couldn't sleep! Now turn off the light! My eyes just adjusted to the dark!  
Suzaku: (Switches the lights off) And Jordan was just hungry?  
Lelouch: I guess… What's your story then? Why are you up scaring the living hell out of people?  
Suzaku: (Sits down) One; I just scared you. Two; I think Jordan woke me up walking down the halls mumbling 'Food'.  
Lelouch: But her room is closer to the stairs than the one you were in.  
Jordan: I got lost… (They look at her) What? It's dark… and I'm half asleep…  
Suzaku: I'd believe it.  
(A loud thud is heard upstairs)  
Jordan: What was that??  
Suzaku: I don't know… Sounded like something dropping on the floor.  
Jordan: Pretty Green Eyes, it's a murderer! He's going to kill us!  
Lelouch: I highly doubt that a murderer would come in through the second floor-  
Jordan: He's going to charge at us with a knife yelling 'Cake or Death'!! Ah, I can't make decisions under pressure!  
Suzaku: Calm down, calm down. I don't know, though… Everyone else is fast asleep…  
Lelouch: Perhaps… C.C. is definitely a heavy sleeper… (Looks at Jordan) What about Ashleigh?  
Jordan: (Holding out her hands like sides of a scale- moving them up and down) Cake… Death… Cake… Death… Ack! What if I say 'death' by mistake!?  
Suzaku: Shh! (Whispers) They're coming down the stairs!  
Jordan: What're we gonna do!?  
Suzaku: Look… I'll grab a bat or something… and when Lelouch tackles him to the ground, I'll flip on the lights and beat him into submission.  
Jordan: Okay!  
Lelouch: Wait, why do I have to tackle him to the ground!?  
Suzaku: With your persuasive skills, I'm sure he won't kill you!  
Jordan: That's actually true…  
Lelouch: Whatever- let's just get this over with.  
(Everyone gets into position. Jordan hides behind the couch with a meat tenderizer. Someone finally comes down the stairs uttering hushed profanity.)  
Suzaku: Now!  
Lelouch: (Inwardly rolls his eyes and leaps towards the person, pinning them to the ground.)  
Suzaku: (Flips on the lights)  
Ashleigh: Bloody hell!! Get your Britannian arse off of me!!  
Jordan: (Pops up) Ashleigh! Why didn't you tell us it was you?  
Ashleigh: I didn't expect a bloody ambush! (Glares at Lulu) I am going to kicketh ye ass if thou dost not get off of me!  
Lelouch: (Stands up, a little ashamed that he actually listened to Jordan and Suzaku…)  
Suzaku: What's with the British accent…?  
Jordan: Oh, when she's half asleep she turns into a limey.  
Suzaku: Ah… But… what was that loud bang we heard?  
Ashleigh: That was me too. I sort of tripped over air…  
Jordan: A clumsy limey.  
Ashleigh: (Struggles to stand and slowly climbs the stairs) Bollocks!

_Lelouch: How do you explain tripping over air?  
Jordan: The same way you explain why my bagels were in the refrigerator!  
Suzaku: What?  
Ashleigh: Jordan makes as much sense as me when she's half asleep. She actually becomes very confused.  
Jordan: Granny… (Grabs Lulu) Granny, what did you do with my sausage?  
Lelouch: I'm not your grandmother! (Tries to shake her off)  
Jordan: Why did you put my sausage in the shower? Come on Betsy… (This time grabs Suzaku) Take me to the shower to get my sausage.  
Suzaku: Huh?  
Ashleigh: Just take her back to bed. She won't remember this in the morning.  
(Suzaku and Jordan head back upstairs)  
Lelouch: What did you come down here for?  
Ashleigh: Huh? I was going somewhere?  
Lelouch: Here, let's go back upstairs too… (Grabs her arm)  
Ashleigh: Let go of me you bloody twit!  
(They both head upstairs)_

_(Morning time!)  
_

_Ashleigh: (Walks into the bathroom) … SUZAKU!  
Suzaku: (Runs in with a toothbrush in his mouth) What is it?  
Ashleigh: Why is Jordan sleeping in the bathtub!?  
Suzaku: She keep saying to take her to the shower!  
Ashleigh: She was halfway asleep! Just help me wake her up…  
(They both walk over to Jordan and start shaking her.)  
Ashleigh: Wake up Jordan!  
Jordan: (Stirs a little)  
Suzaku: (Helps her to her feet)  
Jordan: (Walks down to the kitchen and opens the refrigerator) (Yells) Hey! Who took one of my bagels!?  
(Upstairs)  
Ashleigh: Told you she wouldn't remember._

_  
(Later that day…)_

_  
Jordan, Ash, and Suzaku are all sitting around in the hot sun)  
Ash: Its too hot I'm gonna pass out…  
Suzaku: If only the pool wasn't closed down.  
Ash: I know! Who in their right mind closes a public pool in the middle of summer!?  
Suzaku: (Looks at Jordan, who is sitting quietly) Wow, this is the first time she has ever sat so still and quiet…_  
_Ash: She's only ever quiet when she's planning something…  
Jordan: (Turns around and gives them an evil grin)_

_(Later on…)_

_(Lelouch is running for the bathroom. He opens the door to find Ash, Jordan, and Suzaku all in their bathing suits. Jordan and Suzaku are doing the hula in grass skirts with a fan blowing in their face, while Ash is sitting in a tub of cold water and a fruity drink in her hand. Tropical music is playing in the background)  
Jordan: Aloha Lulu! (She puts a lei around his neck)  
Lelouch: What are you doing in my bathroom!?  
Ash: The pool is closed.  
Lelouch: So? You have your own bathrooms! (At this point Lulu is squirming)  
Jordan: You have a bigger bathtub!  
Suzaku: It'd be cool if we had a hot tub…  
(Lelouch gives up and hops to another bathroom)_

(Owari!)

XxX

**Author's Notes-** Well… Yeah… I still can't figure out why there was a bagel in the refrigerator… Did you catch to YGIAS reference? By the way, I hope the word 'limey' doesn't offend anyone... It probably doesn't but just to be sure.

Jordan's tropical scene makes me want a big glass of Sangria… or Hawaiian Punch… and I _still _can't imagine Suzaku in a grass skirt…

_**Author's Notes-**__ Ok, so we had originally planned for Shirley to just keel over and die completely… but nooooo! _Someone_ had to let her live… And who the hell gave me the Bloody Rose? I'd just end up firing it off again. _

_Question: Is there anything any one would like us to put in later chapters? Anything I could mess with? _

**Bokura wa hen da, **

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter: **Untitled… (Summary: Lots of random things happen. Jordan, Ashleigh, and C.C. build a fort, and maybe tell Lulu the password.)


	8. Fortress

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Pizza Rolls… or Nerf…**

**Author's Notes-** I don't have anything to say… How shocking… Except that we missed two of our favourite reviewers last chapter… (You know who you are!)

_**Author's Notes-** No matter what I do, I just can't KILL him!!_

xXx

_(C.C. and Suzaku are looking out the window with it pouring down rain.)  
(Jordan and Ashleigh walk around the corner)  
Jordan: (Stops and points) What's up with them?  
Ashleigh: It's a little depressing…  
Suzaku: Our class camping trip was canceled due to this rain.  
C.C: Well your God. Make it stop.  
Suzaku: I'm not that skilled.  
Jordan: Why don't you just camp indoors?  
C.C: All the tents are in the classrooms.  
Ashleigh: You can make a tent out of blankets and chairs and… hehe…  
Suzaku: What was up with that laugh?  
Ashleigh: Evil thought.  
Jordan: Everyone to the secret base!  
Ashleigh: I think she means the living room…_

(A few minutes later…)

C.C.: (Holds up a big blanket) Where do I put this?  
Jordan: (Pops out of a big pile of blankets and pillows like a bunny) (Points) Over there please!  
C.C.: (Spreads the blanket over the couch and props it up with a chair) Wow, it really is a secret base!  
Suzaku: (From underneath the ceiling of multi-coloured blankets) We need more pillows down here!  
Ashleigh: (Tosses a few) If it's a secret base… we need to protect it from outsiders…  
Jordan: Password!  
C.C.: Cheese! … What are we doing?  
Ashleigh: She means that we need a password that we make someone say in order to get clearance into the secret base.  
C.C.: Oh… Cheese!  
Suzaku: (Rolls out from under the fort) I don't know… that's a little too predictable…  
Jordan: Yeah… Ooh! What about 'Obliterate!'??  
Ashleigh: (Shakes her head) No, no… still too predictable… (Gasps) I got it! (Whispers in Jordan's ear)  
Jordan: (Grins evilly and whispers to Suzaku and C.C.)  
C.C.: (Shrugs) Okay, sure…  
Suzaku: (Puzzled) What does that even mean?  
Ashleigh: (Waves her hand at him) It's a long story… Now into the fort!  
(They all scurry under the blankets and are hidden from sight.)

(More minutes later…)

Jordan: Shh! I think I hear someone coming!  
(Everyone quiets…)  
Lelouch: (Walks in- talking to himself) Where are those guys? I can't find any of- (Suddenly stops when he sees the fortress of blankets and pillows.) … them… (Pause) Okay, what the heck is going on? What's with this castle in the living room? (Examines the fort.) And why did you use my cape to make it!? (Reaches for the cape)  
Ashleigh: (Pops out of the side of the fort and grabs his ankle) No! You mustn't upset the balance!  
Lelouch: What balance? What are you drabbling about now? Who is in there?!  
Jordan: (Pops up too) If you want to know, you'll need the password!  
Lelouch: … password…  
C.C.: Yes, password. If you don't know it then you aren't allowed inside.  
Lelouch: You three lunatics… I should've guessed…  
Suzaku: (Pops up) Ah, common, guys let him know the password.  
Lelouch: (Taken aback) Suzaku, not you too!  
Suzaku: (Stands up) It's not so bad! The password is geass… I'm not sure what it means but it sounds pretty cool, huh?  
Lelouch: Uh… Sure… Let's go with that.  
Suzaku: (Re-enters the fortress)  
Lelouch: What made you choose _that_ as a password?  
Jordan: (Points at Ashleigh) It was her idea!  
Ashleigh: See: It's a pun. The password is geass. Therefore, Code: Geass. Get it??  
Lelouch: … (Speechless)  
Jordan: (Snaps her fingers) Oh! I get it! Why didn't you tell me that in the first place!  
Ashleigh: I was waiting for the right moment…

_Suzaku: (Pops back out) Why don't you join us Lelouch?  
C.C: Yes you can have the west wing room. (Point towards the kitchen)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Grab his wrists and pull him down)  
Lelouch: Jeez, you didn't have to use force.  
Ashleigh: Would you have come on your own?  
Lelouch: Probably not.  
C.C: Then it's settled. You're staying.  
Suzaku: I think just one more pillow and we're done…  
Ashleigh: At these things don't you usually have fires?  
Lelouch: Just use flashlights like we did for the Christmas tree…  
Jordan: I HAVE IT! (Pulls out a lighter)  
Everyone Else: NO!  
(Jordan aims her lighter at a stack of magazines, Lulu steps in and accidentally ends up getting caught on fire by the lighter.) (Just on the shoulder)  
C.C: Lelouch! You're on fire!  
Ashleigh: STOP, DROP AND ROLL LULU!  
Jordan: (Laughing her ass off)  
(Lelouch decided to listen to Ashleigh)  
Suzaku: (Panicking throws his soda on Lelouch and what do ya know, it put it out.)  
Jordan: (Still giggling a little.) I'm sorry Lulu. (She tries to hug him)  
Lelouch: (A little taken aback, snatches the lighter out of her hands) Give me that!_

Ashleigh: (Her hand on her heart from the shock) WHO THE HELL GAVE JORDAN FLAMABLES!!  
Everyone Else: (Shakes their heads)  
Ashleigh: (Exhales) Holy hell, we're just lucky she didn't have any hairspray!  
Jordan: I knew I was forgetting something!  
Ashleigh: What is it with you and trying to kill people? You were even mad at me when we let Shirley live!  
Jordan: Because we should've just left her dead…  
Suzaku: What are you guys talking about!?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: Uh… nothing…  
Suzaku: You're talking about Shirley living and dying you know!  
Lelouch: (Zoned out, nursing what is quite possibly a second to third degree burn.)  
Ashleigh: We're not serious Pretty Green Eyes! (Laughs nervously) We're just… talking… Surely you know the two of us by now, right…?  
Suzaku: But-  
C.C.: You know what would be awesome…?  
Jordan: What?  
C.C.: A tree… that grew… pizzas…  
Suzaku: …  
Jordan: That _would_ be awesome…  
C.C.: I'd call it… a Pizza Tree…  
Ashleigh: I wonder… If we planted a Pizza-Roll in the ground… would it grow a Pizza Tree?  
Jordan: Let's go try it!  
(The three of them run off into the kitchen.)  
Suzaku: … What's going on!?  
Lelouch: (Chucks the lighter at his head)

_(The Girls walk back in…)_

_C.C: I hope it rains soon. (Staring out window)  
Suzaku: Now what do you guys wanna do?  
Lelouch: Sleep…  
Jordan: No Lulu! It's too early!  
Ashleigh: Why don't we sing camp songs?  
Jordan: (Singing) There's a hole in the middle of the sea! (CLAP, CLAP)  
Suzaku: Wait why is there a hole? Is it like a whirlpool?  
Ashleigh: No, it's just a hole.  
Lelouch: In the middle of the sea?  
Jordan: Now you've got it!  
C.C.: (Clap, Clap)  
Suzaku: Okay, we've done the singing now lets get onto the smores.  
Jordan: But Lulu won't let me light a fire again...  
Lelouch: (Looks at her evilly)  
Ashleigh: We'll just make them in the microwave.  
(Suzaku and Lelouch go to make smores while the girls wait in the living room)  
Ashleigh: Hey… Wanna play a game?  
Jordan: (Cautiously) Suurre…  
Ashleigh: Stare at my finger with out laughing for a whole minute.  
(Jordan sits there staring at her finger along with C.C)  
(In the Kitchen Lelouch's cell phone is going off)  
(PING-PING)  
Jordan: Oh, I heard a ding... Foods done! (She leaps up and runs into the kitchen) Hey, I heard the microwave go off!  
Lelouch: Jordan wait that was my- (BAM!)  
(Jordan opened the door to the microwave way too early and the marshmallow blew up... Right in Lulu's face.)  
Lelouch: Cell phone…  
Suzaku: (Takes a finger and gets some marshmallow off of Lulu's face and tastes it) Needs chocolate._

Lelouch: (Wipes off the marshmallow with a towel and chucks the chocolate at his head this time.) There's your chocolate.  
Suzaku: (Not phased in the slightest.) (Opens one of the chocolate bars and breaks off a piece to eat) Thanks!  
Jordan: Can I have some??  
Suzaku: (Breaks it in half and hands it to her) Here.  
Jordan: Thank-a! (Goes back to the fort with Suzaku following)

(Back in the living room…)

C.C.: Pizza! I'd fill it with pizza… or just melted cheese…  
Ashleigh: I thought so…  
Suzaku: What are you guys talking about?  
Ashleigh: I asked C.C. if she had a giant, human-sized hamster-rolley-ball-thing, what would she fill it with? What about you, Pretty Green Eyes?  
Lelouch: Are there limitations…?  
Ashleigh: (Shakes her head) Nope. No matter what it is you won't die. You could fill it with water if you wanted to…  
Jordan: I'd fill mine with Skittles! No… Thai food! … No Skittles!  
Ashleigh: I dunno what I'd fill mine with… Probably Green Tea… I'm thirsty now…  
Suzaku: Wow, that's a really hard question…  
Lelouch: What could've possibly lead to this conversation…  
Jordan: (Gets an idea) I know what! (Whispers to Ashleigh)  
Ashleigh: Yes, that's perfect! Let's go. There's got to be some universe with that in it!  
(The two run off- searching the many manga and anime universes.)  
Suzaku, Lelouch, and C.C.: (Exchange glances, slightly worried.)  
(Not even a few seconds later the two come back. Evil grins on both of their faces.)  
Jordan: Everyone come outside!  
(The three walk outside)  
C.C.: (Eyes widen) That's… the most… pizza… I've ever… seen… (Runs towards the giant hamster toy filled with pizzas.)  
Suzaku: Where's ours…?  
Jordan: (Points) The clear one is for Lelouch.  
Lelouch: There's nothing in it.  
Ashleigh: That's because it's indestructible and soundproof.  
Lelouch: (Doesn't move but mumbles) Sanctuary…  
Suzaku: (Getting excited) Where's mine?  
Jordan: It's around the corner. It was too much trouble to move…  
Suzaku: (Runs towards the corner) Okay!  
Jordan: Wait, Pretty Green Eyes we have to tell you something!  
Suzaku: (Stops just as he rounds the corner and tilts his head to the side.) …Rivalz?

_Ashleigh: That's what we need to tell you… See, on our way back we ran into Rivalz and we couldn't think of what to put in yours…  
Jordan: and he agreed to it.  
Suzaku: (Just stands there)  
Rivalz: Hey guys! Hey when do I get out of here??  
Ashleigh: Well get you out in the morning.  
Jordan: (Grabs Suzaku) Come on Pretty Green Eyes, lets go inside.  
(They try to drag everyone inside)  
Lelouch: (Clinging to his hamster ball) No, I don't want to go inside just leave me out here with my hamster ball!  
(The other four eventually drag him inside)  
Ashleigh: Hey Jordy look, Karen and Candice sent us these Nerf guns!  
Jordan: Sweet! You guys wanna play?  
Suzaku: YES!  
Lelouch: Sure…  
(They hand every one a Nerf gun)  
(Suzaku fires the first shot at Jordan)  
(Lelouch prepares himself for attack)  
(Ashleigh pops out another mattress as her shield)  
(Suzaku runs past C.C)  
(C.C. not knowing how to work the gun just hits Suzaku with it instead of the bullet.)  
Suzaku: Ow, what did you do that for?  
C.C: Is this not what you do with the gun?  
Lelouch: No, no C.C, look. (He helps her fire a bullet out)  
(The bullet heads for an open window where it ends up hitting Suzaku's hamster ball outside)  
Rivalz: (Turns around shocked) Holy!  
(The bullet's little impact was enough to push Rivalz and the ball... down a hill.)  
Rivalz: Help! You guys!  
Jordan: (About to close the window looks out) OH MY SUZAKU!  
Ashleigh: What?  
Jordan: That looks like so much fun!  
Everyone else: (Walks over to the window) RIVALZ!  
(They all run down the hill to save Rivalz, and bring him back up to the Clubhouse)  
C.C: Rivalz, I'm sorry…  
Rivalz: (Using Suzaku for support) It's ok, it was kindda fun…  
Jordan: Told you.  
(They walk through the clubhouse doors into the living room)  
Rivals: (Stops and stares) What in the world is this?  
Ashleigh: Our fortress._

Rivalz: Awesome! (Runs around the fort) Can I stay here with you guys??  
Suzaku: I don't know… It's getting pretty late and the dorm rules and all…  
Rivalz: Yeah… too bad. I'll see you tomorrow. (Leaves)  
Jordan: (Yawns) Sleep… (Crawls into the fort without another word)  
(The other four eventually join her)

(In the middle of the night…)

(Arthur, the cat, sneaks into the room and starts rubbing against, pawing at, and all around messing with the fort. After a few minutes, the immense fort collapses in its entirety on the five slumbering, unsuspecting people. He scurries away.)  
C.C.: (Clutches a couch cushion that landed on her torso) Cheese-kun…  
Jordan: (Like C.C. fails to wake up) (Not surprised in the least) Ahhh… there's a giant dog crushing me… giant golden… retriever… Ahhh….  
Ashleigh: (Wakes up but is still technically asleep so doesn't give a crap.) (British accent) … oh, bugger… (Turns and goes back to sleep)  
Lelouch and Suzaku: (Wake up with a start)

(That morning…)

Jordan: (Wakes up to several layers of blankets and the like covering her face) AH!! (Sits straight up and "fights" the covers) The fort collapsed!? Why!? When!?  
Ashleigh: (Throws a pillow at Jordan) Shut it, twit… (Tries to sleep)  
Jordan: (Calms down and looks around.) (Sees Suzaku lying on top of all the covers, sleeping. She turns to where C.C. should be and just sees a giant square piece of cushion with two arms wrapped around it.) Uh… Where's Lelouch?  
Ashleigh: (Mumbles) Bugger if I know…  
Jordan: Maybe he was crushed or suffocated!!  
Ashleigh: (Grabs another random pillow and chucks it at Jordan)  
Suzaku: (Had his pillow suddenly ripped out from under his head. His skull collides with the floor.) Ow… Hey, what's going on?  
Ashleigh: That twit lost Lelouch and now she won't bugger off…  
Suzaku: What? "Lost" him? (Looks around) Oh… I thought he was right over here…  
(Jordan and Suzaku commence ripping apart the remains of the fort. Checking between every blanket and every pillowcase.)  
C.C.: (Disturbed from her sleep, still clinging to the cushion) Why don't you check outside…?  
Jordan: That's a good idea! (Grabs Suzaku and Ashleigh and runs outside)  
Ashleigh: Why the bloody hell do I have to come along??  
(The three get outside to find the three Hamster Balls. Lelouch sits in his, asleep, with a book over his face.)  
Jordan: (Crosses her arms) What a jerk… I was worried…  
Suzaku: Yeah… At least we found him.  
Ashleigh: (Slightly more awake… British accent is fading) Can we push his arse over a hill?  
Jordan: (Already getting ready to do it)  
(They push him down the hill Rivalz had fallen down yesterday. Suzaku didn't help much from laughing too hard. Lelouch was undisturbed the entire time from the ball being soundproof.)  
Lelouch: (Wakes up suddenly from doing flips, rolling and such. He yells several profanities and by the time he reaches the bottom, he's devised at least ten ways to kill the three that pushed him down the hill…) (Climbs out of the hamster ball and tries to run up the hill but falls over because he's dizzy.)  
(The other three go to the bottom of the hill.) _Like moths to a Bug-Zapper, eh?_  
Suzaku: (Still laughing) Are you alright?  
Lelouch: (Stumbles up and tries to take a swing at him… He misses like a blind guy with a bow and arrow…)  
Jordan: (Tries to breathe- she's laughing too hard.)  
Ashleigh: (Watches with a flat look) Can I go back to sleep now?

Owari!

XxX

**Author's Notes- **Wow that chapter was really random… Again I demonstrate the ability to pull mattresses out of some secret inter-dimensional space that I manage to store them in… Who knew?

_**Author's Notes-**__ I'm curious as to where Nunnally was during all of this? That "Look at my finger" game is one we have actually played, and I did hear the microwave go off while playing it. (Except I had Spaghetti-os in there instead) Oh, and I'm not a real pyro. If you're wondering, Candice and Karen are friends of ours. What would you put in your hamster ball??_

**We're Anti-Climactic Fools,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter: ** You Sunk My Battleship! _(Chapter Title is subject to change without warning or explanation.)_  
(Summary: My personally most anticipated chapter. Crazy-me on meds… goes on a Britannia-Ranting-Spree. Fun!)


	9. Britannia Did It!

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or The Mist… or 300… or Oreos… or Fruits Basket… or Naruto… or There Will Be Blood…**

**Author's Notes**- Sorry for the wait you guys… We've been working on this chapter for a while now, I know… and it's short… But believe me, the next chapter will make up for it **tremendously**!

_**Author's Notes**- (Crying) I'm home! I missed you people so much. I swear I'll never go off with crazy grandma again._

xXx

(At the Clubhouse…)

(Jordan, Suzaku, and Ashleigh are sitting, staring into space. Bored out of their skulls.)  
Suzaku: (Sighs) What are we going to do?  
Ashleigh: (Bursts out laughing for no good reason and suddenly stops)  
Jordan: (Nothing out of the ordinary...) I don't know... I'm bored!  
Suzaku: (Points) What was that just now?  
Jordan: Oh her? Don't worry, she must've taken too many allergy pills again...  
Suzaku: Again?  
Ashleigh: (Stares at an upside-down bottle of water sitting on the table. Jordan turned everything on the table upside-down in sheer boredom.)  
Lelouch: (Walks into the room and bumps the table as he sits down.)  
(The bottle tips over and falls off of the table. It rolls away.)  
Ashleigh: (Mumbles) Checkmate...  
Suzaku: What? Jordan, are you sure she's alright?  
Jordan: Perfectly fine, why?  
Suzaku: Well, she-  
Ashleigh: (Suddenly stands up and grabs Lulu's shoulders) You sunk my battleship!!  
Lelouch: What the hell are you on about!?  
Jordan: Oh...  
Ashleigh: My battleship! Phillip was on _that_ ship! You killed him! You killed my best friend! (Dry-sobs on Lulu's shoulder) You MURDERER!  
Jordan: Yeah, I see what you mean now.  
Lelouch: What the hell is going on!? Did she suddenly go looney!?  
Suzaku: Apparently she's just over-medicated.  
Lelouch: She seems more UNDER-medicated to me!  
Jordan: Wait a minute... Your best friend? What about me?  
Suzaku: I don't think she's talking about a real pers-  
Ashleigh: PHIIIILLIIIIP!!  
Lelouch: (Pretty dumbstruck, now deft in one ear)  
Jordan: ... Well, I'm not bored anymore.  
Lelouch: What am I supposed to do?!  
Suzaku: (Shrugs)  
Lelouch: (Somehow manages to stand up) Get this crazy person off of me!  
Jordan: (Thinks for a moment) Looks like she's already asleep.  
Suzaku and Lelouch: What!?  
Jordan: Yeah, those pills make her crazy and sleepy...  
Suzaku: ... At the same time??  
Lelouch: Sheesh, I can't even sit down for five seconds anymore... Something clinically insane always happens...  
Jordan: (Gets right next to Ashleigh's ear) ASH!!  
Ashleigh: (Suddenly wakes up and shoves Lulu away) THE BRITANNIAN'S ARE COMING!!  
Lelouch: (Pushed backwards, stumbles over a chair and falls)

_Jordan: Ash, there are Britannians all around you… Calm down.  
Ashleigh: But... but… the Britannians… they're always up to something!!  
Suzaku: (Helping Lelouch up, looses focus and drops him.) Now that's not true!  
Lelouch: (Stands up on his own) They are too… I mean this is what Zero is fighting for.  
Suzaku: Well some Britannians are fighting for the same thing just using different methods.  
Ashleigh: (Steps in between them) No, no, listen to my view! Now then, Britannians are always up to something… like…  
Jordan: (Interrupting) Like Britannia just ran over your cat!  
Ashleigh: Jordan, that makes no sense.  
Jordan: It proves Britannia is up to something…  
Lelouch: Britannia is a country not a car.  
Jordan: The ruler can be in a car…  
Ashleigh: Anyways, back to my point…_

Jordan: Your point is Anti-Britannia.  
Ashleigh: No, my point is that all catastrophes and relative annoyances are directly or indirectly connected to Britannia.  
Suzaku: How can you just make the government your scapegoat??  
Ashleigh: I manage… But, you see, it's like… Say the police have a shootout with a band of criminals… blah, blah… several civilian casualties. Sounds normal, but no one will tell you that the police, not the criminals, cause the casualties!  
Suzaku: That's because the people need to have a positive view of the police force! If the citizens can't trust the police, who can they trust?!  
Jordan: God? Oh, uh… You?  
Ashleigh: Why does the power go out? Britannia. "There's something! In the mist!"? Britannia!  
Suzaku: Now you're just being ridiculous.  
Ashleigh: Why did the Spartans fight the Persians? Britannia. They just tossed an Oreo in between them and they went at it… Why does that stupid Naruto kid say "Believe it!" all the time? Britannia. He was an experiment gone wrong: A new "Ninja's for Britannia!". Something happened and he has a speech impediment. Instead of saying, "Britannia!" he says, "Believe it!" So they put him in an orange jumpsuit and dumped him in another universe.  
Suzaku: Wha- (Turns to Lelouch) Why aren't you saying anything?!  
Lelouch: I stopped taking her seriously at the Stephen King reference.  
Ashleigh: Who put the Zodiac Curse on the Sohma family?  
Jordan: Britannia! Who killed the dinosaurs?  
Ashleigh: Chuck Norris!  
Jordan and Suzaku: …  
Ashleigh: … And Britannia…

_Suzaku: (Turns back to Lelouch) I see why you stopped taking her seriously, but come on! You're a Britannian too!  
Lelouch: I don't see the point of arguing with those two. (Pointing to Jordan and Ashleigh to make his point.)  
Ashleigh: (Dozing off again, water bottle in hand)  
Jordan: (Circling Suzaku, trying to figure out how to get his keys)  
Lelouch: See, you shouldn't take them seriously.  
Ashleigh: (Suddenly awake) You also shouldn't take Britannia seriously.  
Suzaku: And just why not!?  
Jordan: (Still circling Suzaku) Cause Britannia is all around you. It's waiting for you. Every move you make Britannia is watching. What does this look like!? (Shoves a spatula in Suzaku's face.)  
Suzaku: Umm… a spatula??  
Ashleigh: (Now helping her circle him) Well it's not! It's the camera Britannia is using to watch you!  
Jordan: You can't even make a waffle with out Britannia seeing you do it!  
Ashleigh: You can't even BREATHE with out Britannia seeing you!  
Jordan: (Grabs Lelouch and shoves him in Suzaku's face) See, even Lulu is watching!  
Lelouch: This is a little to close for comfort…  
Suzaku: (Now feeling a little frightened)  
Ashleigh: (Still circling Suzaku) Britannia will get inside your head and mess with you!  
Jordan: (Still circling Suzaku as well) And the next thing you know… They'll ATTACK!! (Just as she says this, she pounces on him, tackling him to the ground, takes his keys, and runs up stairs.)  
Ashleigh: Jordan wait! Take Philip with you!_

Ashleigh: (Runs up the stairs after Jordan)  
Suzaku: (Stands up) She took my keys!  
Lelouch: Which is why I was standing over here.  
Suzaku: It's not like you were much help. (Pause) Do they still have that cape-thing of yours?  
Lelouch: … Unfortunately…  
Suzaku: We need a plan to get them back… They're probably stashed in their rooms somewhere, right? So just sneak in and get them.  
Lelouch: Preferably late at night…?  
Suzaku: Yeah… but how late? 'Cause I have to go back to base and… yeah, all that stuff…  
Lelouch: I have prior commitments as well… four?  
Suzaku: Okay then. 4 A.M., we meet back here.  
Lelouch: Alright.

Later that night…

(About midnight… The Black Knights are on the move!)  
Zero: (Has the leader of the opposing force cornered, a handgun pointed at him.)  
(He's finished his speech, there's no one around… He's about to pull the trigger and get it over with. He opens his mouth to say something -but the other guy can't see that…- all of a sudden, from behind him, a gruff male voice exclaims-)  
Random Voice: I… DRINK… YOUR… MILKSHAKE!!  
Zero: (Stops dead-frozen)  
Cornered Guy: (Turns his head to the side) … Wha-?  
Zero: (Turns around)  
(There is clearly a hand holding a voice-recorder sticking out from behind a building.)  
Zero: (Knows exactly who's responsible. Sighs, fires, and storms towards where the hand used to be.)

(Later… at 4 A.M…)

_(Suzaku and Lelouch finally meet up.)  
Suzaku: Are you ready to do this?  
Lelouch: (Nods)_

_  
(Suzaku quietly sneaks into Jordan's room, carefully pulling open drawers and searching. He moves across the floor like the ninja that he is but accidentally steps on a squeaky toy.)  
(Jordan stretches in her sleep, slightly moved by the noise.)  
Suzaku: (Sigh of relief)  
(Just as she moves the light of the moon catches something shiny under her pillow.)  
Suzaku: (Thinking) My keys!  
(He slowly reaches under her pillow and grabs his keys.)  
Suzaku: (Proud) Aha!  
Jordan: (Stirs, grabs her pillow, and starts beating Suzaku with it.) SPIDER!! (Bashes Suzaku's head.) SPIDER!! (Elbows him in the stomach.) AAAHHH!!  
(Suzaku falls to the ground.)  
(Jordan finally throws the pillow on his head and falls right back asleep.)  
(Suzaku quietly crawls away.)  
(Out side f Jordan's room…)  
Suzaku: OWWWW!!_

_  
(Lelouch also manages to sneak inside Ashleigh's room)  
(He automatically spots his cape. The only bad thing is, Ashleigh has a tight grip on it.)  
(He walks over and grabs the end of the cape and tugs it a little.)  
(Nothing)  
(He tugs it a little harder.)  
(Nothing)  
(He jerks it so hard it causes her arm to flying up with it)  
Ashleigh: (Tackles Lelouch to the ground.) SHOPLIFTER!!  
Lelouch: (Now pined under Ashleigh's arm.) Suzaku...Suzaku...!  
Suzaku: (Stalks in) Lelouch? Where are you?  
Lelouch: (Whispering) Look on the other side of the bed!  
(Suzaku walks over to the other side of the bed.)  
Suzaku: How did this happen?  
Lelouch: Just help me!  
(Suzaku carefully lifts Ash's to where Lelouch can scoot out with his cape.)  
Lelouch: Got it! Did you get your keys?  
Suzaku: Yeah, but man, is Jordan violent in her sleep.  
Lelocuh: Tell me about it… (Rubbing the back of his head where Ash flung him to the ground.)_

_(Morning!!)_

_Ashleigh:(Thinking) How the bloody hell did I end up in the floor?? Wait! Where...Where Oh my Suzaku! (Aloud) THE CAPE!  
(In Jordan's room, Jordan is also awakening.)  
(She pops right out of bed)  
Jordan: (Thinking) Time to take the Lancelot for a drive. (She reaches under the pillow) ... (Aloud) THE KEYS!  
(Both girls run out of their rooms)  
(At same time)  
Ashleigh: LELOUCH!__  
Jordan: SUZAKU!_

_(Downstairs…)_

_Suzaku: Do you think we're in trouble?  
Lelouch: Like it's anything new._

_End_

XxX

**Author's Notes-** I really wish he would say that milkshake line!! Sheesh, it would be so perfect!

_**Author's Notes-**__ This was sort of an actual conversation… that, of course, happened while I was hyper… due to all my random comments!_

**The rant actually happened… I was yelling at a thunderstorm,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter: **Suzaku Announce! _(This chapter title is also subject to change without warning or explanation.)_

(Summary: A really long chapter. Includes bowling and things I don't want to say on account of ruining the greatest surprise this story has ever seen!!)


	10. Brilliantly Intoxicated

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Hanabusa Aidou… or Pringles… or the Stairmaster… or Tylenol… or the Waffle House…**

**Author's Notes- **Please bear with us… In a fit of rage, Suzaku and Lelouch hopped into a tractor trailer, ran us into a ditch, and drove off… Long story short: we were in a car accident. Don't worry, though. Jordan's magical powers kept us safe.

_**Author's Notes-** True story!!_

xXx

_(Clubhouse!)_

_(Ashleigh is snooping through Lelouch's drawers.)  
Ashleigh: Darn it, where did he hide that stupid yet magnificent thing!  
(She burst open the last drawer on the left.)  
Ashleigh: Finally! But why the hell is it in here??  
(She throws the cape over her shoulders and buttons it and goes running down stairs.)_

_(Downstairs…)_

_(Lelouch and Suzaku are sitting on the couch; Jordan, C.C., and Kallen are all in the dinning room playing cards. He sees Ashleigh run by in his cape.)  
Lelouch: (Stands up fast) How did you find it this time!?  
Ashleigh: I know where you hide everything, Lulu.  
Lelouch: (Looks confused)  
Ashleigh: In your underwear drawer! (Hopes up on the dinning room table.) Look what I have! (Holds up a pair of his boxers.)  
Lelouch: Give me those! (Snatches them away from her)  
C.C: So, what's our adventure for today?  
Jordan: How about we go bowling?  
Kallen: Yeah, I haven't done that in a while…  
Suzaku: Sounds fun.  
Jordan: Everyone go get your bowling balls! (Stands up on a chair)  
Lelouch: Will you two get off the furniture!!_

_(At The Bowling Alley…)_

_C.C: Hey Ash, how come your bowling-ball bag is so…?  
Kallen: Misshaped?  
Jordan: Exactly.  
Ashleigh: (Pets the bag) All in time… All in time…  
Suzaku: (Leans over toward Lelouch) She's up to something.  
Lelouch: You think!? (Hand up in air, ready to slap him.)  
Suzaku: Hey look, a lanes open! (Runs away)  
Lelouch: (Swings his hand but misses and goes falling face forward in to a guy carrying nachos and cheese.)  
Guy w/ Nachos: Dude, my nachos!  
Lelouch: Here. (Hands him a five-dollar bill.)  
Guy w/ Nachos: (Walks off)  
Lelouch: (Walks over to the others)  
Kallen: How did you get cheese all over you?  
Lelouch: With a stupid move.  
Jordan: (Pats him on the back) As usual. I call purple ball!  
C.C: Ashleigh, it's your turn.  
Ashleigh: (At this time, pulls out what's in her bag.)  
Lelouch: What the hell do you think your doing with that!? (Points at Zero's helmet.)  
Ashleigh: Bowling._

Suzaku: What is that?  
Jordan: (Stands in front of Suzaku so he can't see. She shoves a pitcher in his face.) Here, Pretty Green Eyes! Have some punch!  
Suzaku: (Distracted) Uh, sure… Why not? (Takes some and tastes it.) It tastes kind of funny… what's in it?  
Jordan: (Acting innocent) Oh, sorry, I ran out of sugar so it's not that sweet. That must be it, huh?  
Suzaku: I guess…  
(He takes another sip and fails to notice Ashleigh and Lelouch halfway brawling over the helmet, her bashing him in the face with the bag and tossing the helmet down the bowling lane.)  
Ashleigh: (Bounces) Strike!  
Lelouch: (Pulls the bag out of his face and stalks off to retrieve the discarded mask.) It should be legal to kill people like you…

(A little while later…)

Suzaku: (Holds his cup out to Jordan) Punch pweash!  
Jordan: Pweash? Uh… (Shakes the container upside down over the cup.) It's all gone! Suzaku, Suzaku! You drank it all!  
Suzaku: (Laughs obnoxiously loud)  
Kallen: (Stares at him wide-eyed) What was in that punch?  
Ashleigh: (With a normal bowling ball in hand) Vodka.  
Kallen: Are you serious!?  
Jordan: I didn't think I'd given him that much… But before I knew it, he had drank my entire pitcher…  
C.C.: It's ALL gone??  
Ashleigh: (Suddenly whips out another pitcher) Don't worry, C.C., my batch remains untouched!  
C.C.: (Makes a glass) Sweet nectar. (Sips it)  
Ashleigh: Want some, Kallen?  
Kallen: (Watches Suzaku throw a strike… in the wrong lane.) Just a little. I have a feeling I'm going to want to remember this night.  
Lelouch: (Walks up to Suzaku- having missed the entire conversation the other four just had.) What's up with you? You know this is the wrong lane, right?  
Suzaku: (Stares blankly at him)  
Lelouch: (Starts to feel uncomfortable) What? What is it?  
Suzaku: (Crashes back to Earth with a look of realization on his face.) Lelouch?  
Lelouch: Suzaku?  
Suzaku: (Suddenly pulls him into a giant hug. His voice slurs just a teeny bit, but he's very loud.) Do you know that you're my best friend!?  
Lelouch: (Shocked) I'm fearing for my sense of hearing here, alright? What's going on with you? Are you sick or something? (No response) Suzaku?  
Suzaku: (Being a space cadet… Suddenly realizes that he's on Earth, and for some unknown reason reaches to grab…)  
Lelouch: (Trying to stay calm) Are you listening to me? Common, I need an answer here. You- (Suddenly cut off from Suzaku's hand making contact and squeezing his ass.)  
Suzaku: Suzaku… GRAB!  
Lelouch: GAH!! (Shoves Suzaku back into the bowling lane and covers himself as an instinctive defense.) Pervert!!  
Suzaku: (Doesn't know what's going on) Suzaku dizzy…  
Kallen: Yeah, I'm definitely going to want to remember this.  
C.C.: (Pumps her drink in the air.) Rip his top off!

_Ashleigh: Here Lulu, calm your self with this. (Hands him some punch)  
Lelouch: Thanks… (Sips)(Cough) What is this!?  
Kallen: It'll help you loosen up.  
Suzaku: (Off in a corner clapping his hands) YAY!  
Jordan: Ok, if we're going to do this let's at least do it in the correct place.  
C.C: Great, I know the perfect place. (Grabs everyone and leads them out to the car)_

_(They pull up to a lit up bar with neon lights and everything.)  
Lelouch: C.C., do I want to know how you know this place is here?  
C.C: Nope. (Holds open the door for everyone)  
(Lelouch, Kallen and C.C sit down at the bar)  
(A flock of girls surround Suzaku)  
(Jordan and Ash spot two familiar friends.)  
Jordan: CANDICE! KAREN!  
Karen: Hey, what are you guys doing here?  
Jordan: With some friends!  
Ashleigh: We could ask you the same thing.  
Karen: Candice wanted a drink so I brought her here. (Points at a sloshed Candice thrown over a table.)  
Ashleigh: Looks like she had more than just a drink... (Pokes Candice)  
Candice: (Rolls over) Fingernails… Unh…  
Ashleigh: What did she just say?  
Karen: Who knows... What friends are you here with?  
Jordan: Well that's Suzaku in the crowd of girls. And that's Lelouch, C.C, and Kallen.(Points at bar)  
Lelouch: (Dramatic gasp) (Whiney voice) Oh God…  
Suzaku: Yes?  
Lelouch: (On the verge of crying) No, not you... I just realized that… the whole… damn country is after me! (Slams his head on the bar next to his five empty cups) I mean why wouldn't they!? I AM...  
Kallen: (Pours her drink on his head) (Whispers) Stupid! Don't go announcing it to the whole world!  
Suzaku: Suzaku confused?? It's ok! SUZKAU CONSOLE!  
(Suzaku gets right in Lelouch's face with a gigantic smile.)  
(Jordan, Ashleigh, and Karen- with Candice holding on to her- walk over to see what's going on.)  
Jordan: Suzaku, I don't think that's gonna work…  
Random Girl: Suzaku! Come back to us!  
Lelouch: (Brings both hands to his face) How come he gets all the girls?! What does he have that I don't?! Besides the athletic ability… and the military status… and those gorgeous green eyes…  
Suzaku: Don't forget my sweet ass!  
(Everyone stares at him)  
Jordan: (Puts her hands on his shoulders) Suzaku… just turn around for me for a minute, ok?  
Suzaku: SUZAKU TURN! (He turns around)  
(Ashleigh, Jordan, Kallen, C.C, Karen, and Candice all stare at his ass for a minute.)  
C.C: (Sips her martini.) It's like someone sculpted it.  
Karen: It's like a Stairmaster…  
Candice: (Slurred) It looks like two Pringles kissing.  
(Jordan and Ashleigh fall over laughing.)  
Bartender: Hey Mister. (Talking to Suzaku) Are gonna steal all my lady customers or actually have a drink?  
Kallen: Give him a daiquiri.  
(Bartender slams the drink on the bar)  
Kallen: Here Suzaku, drink this.  
Suzaku: SUZAKU DRINK! (Gulps it down)  
Ashleigh: If he keeps this up, he'll never be sober…  
Lelouch: (Banging his fist on the bar, wailing) What have I done?! So many people!!_

Suzaku: Suzaku wonder…  
Ashleigh: (Gives him a flat look) Astounding…  
Mob of Girls: (With a yoo-hoo ring to it) Suzaku!  
Suzaku: Suzaku… popular!  
Karen: Damn, I wish he'd stop announcing everything he's freaking doing!  
Candice: You and me both… unless it's 'Suzaku see Aidou!' I don't give a damn!  
Lelouch: (Clutching a glass) No one even acknowledges me anymore!!  
Suzaku: (Somehow got his hands on another drink) Suzaku DRINK!! (-Do I really have to put that he drank it? It's kind of obvious…-)  
Karen: (Her eye twitches) Suzaku's gonna have my foot stuck up his ass in a minute!!  
Suzaku: Suzaku scared…  
Karen: (Holds up a fist) Suzaku better run!!  
Suzaku: Suzaku… FLEE!  
(Karen chases Suzaku in a circle around the bar)  
C.C.: Well this is entertaining… (Still sipping a martini- different one.)  
Jordan: Hey, C.C. how many of those have you had?  
C.C.: About a dozen, why?  
Ashleigh: Sheesh, you hold your liquor pretty well! You act exactly the same as when you're-  
C.C.: (Suddenly collapses)  
Ashleigh: … Sober… Well, I guess that's enough proof that she's gone.  
Jordan: (Nods) Uh-huh…  
Karen: (Still chasing Suzaku) Get back here you little bastard!!  
Suzaku: Suzaku need help!!  
Kallen: Okay, okay… you don't need to chase him around…  
Suzaku: Suzaku… FWOMP! (Tackles Kallen)  
Kallen: (Pushes him away) Alright, go ahead.  
Karen: (Bashes Suzaku in the head with a tray) Guh!!  
Suzaku: Suzaku… hurt… (He falls in the floor)  
Karen: (Sits by the bar, tired) Finally, he shut up!  
Jordan: (Pokes Suzaku with her foot) Did you have to hit him that hard?  
Ashleigh: (Sitting beside Karen with a glass of Sangria) Probably.  
Suzaku: (Still unconscious) (Mumbles) Suzaku sleep…  
Jordan: Ooookaaayyy…  
Suzaku: (Out of nowhere…) SUZAKU- snooore…. SUZAKU- snooore…  
Karen: (Slams her fist on the bar) Give me a drink!  
Lelouch: (Suddenly) What's the point!?  
Ashleigh: (Jumps, spilling her Sangria) HOLY!  
Lelouch: We're all going to die in the end anyway! So why even try to accomplish anything!!  
Jordan: Great… he's gone emo on us… (Walks to where Kallen and Candice are chatting) I'll be over here…  
Ashleigh: (Hits him) You made me spill my Sangria, you bitch!  
Lelouch: (Looks up with a helpless look)  
Ashleigh: Oh cra-  
Lelouch: (Buries his face in the bar with his hands covering his head) Another mistake! I can't do it! The entire military's after my head in a silver dish and I can't… not spill a drink!!  
Karen: (Downs another shot) I'm going to kill those two before the night's over.  
Ashleigh: (Watches Lelouch's shoulders heave- wondering if he's actually crying- with a sick and unbelieving look.) If he doesn't do it himself first…  
Suzaku: SUZAKU- snooore… (Keeps going)  
Karen: He's about to piss me off!!  
Ashleigh: I figured he's already accomplished that…  
Lelouch: (Muffled by the bar and his own arms) I think I need a hug…  
Ashleigh: Ugh… Can I have a stronger drink, please?

_Suzaku: (suddenly awake and bouncy as ever) Suzaku HUG! (Hugs Lelouch)  
Karen: HOW THE HELL!?  
Ashleigh: Guess you didn't knock him out hard enough.  
__Kallen__: Or he's just that obsessed with Lelouch.  
Jordan: (Nodding) I'd go with that one.  
Candice: Hey guys look what I can do! (She jumps up on a table and starts to do the chicken dance)  
Suzaku: (Points to Candice screaming) Burn the witch!  
C.C: (Pops out between two guys, martini in hand) You summoned?  
Ashleigh: Whoah, when did she wake up?  
Jordan: (Looking back and fourth at the spot where C.C was passed out and where she stands now.)  
Kallen: (Shaking her head)  
Karen: (Holding the tray again above Suzaku's head. Swings at him)  
Suzaku: (Leans over to get a penny on the ground.)  
Karen: (Obviously misses and smashes all the glass cups onto the ground)  
Bar tender: WHY YOU...!  
Random Guys: Hey your green haired friend over here passed out again!  
Jordan: Come on you guys lets get out of here before we cause anymore damage…  
Ashleigh: What do we do with C.C.?  
Kallen: Lay her on the couch.  
Karen: Hey! Lelouch and Suzaku help her.  
(Suzaku and Lelouch walk over to C.C)  
Suzaku: Suzaku LIFT!_

_(Back at the Clubhouse…)_

_Suzaku: Suzaku… TOSS!__  
(They throw C.C. on the nearest couch.)_

_(Outside)_

_Karen: Hey, we'll meet up with you guys later. I have to get Candice home and I don't know how much more I can take of Suzaku…  
Jordan and Ashleigh: BYE!_

_(Karen and Candice leave)  
Kallen: I'm hungry…  
Jordan: Lets go get waffles!  
__Ashleigh: (Dramatic point) To the Waffle House!_

_(Halfway to the Waffle House)  
Suzaku: Suzaku PEE!  
Ashleigh: No Suzaku, not there!_

_(At the Asplund household…)_

_(Phone ringing)  
Lloyd: (Sigh) Yes what is it?  
Suzaku: Lloyd!  
Lloyd: Yes, Kururugi, what is it? Why are you calling me this late?  
Suzaku: Ummm… Suzaku forget.  
Lloyd: Well, please try to remember  
Suzaku: Suzaku think!  
Lloyd: Yes, yes…  
Suzaku: SUZAKU REMEMBER!  
Lloyd: And what is it Suzaku?  
Suzaku: Suzaku… break law!  
Lloyd: Yes, and what law did you break?  
Suzaku: Umm...  
Jordan: (Took phone from Suzaku) Listen Lloyd, we had a little accident out here… Well, a ticket.  
Lloyd: Well what's this ticket for?  
Jordan: Well Suzaku is a little... out of it right now and we have a ticket for… public urination and well since your his guardian we need you to pay the ticket.  
Lloyd: I don't remember becoming his "guardian".  
Jordan: Well we just need you to pay the ticket and we'll talk to you later so bye!  
(Hands phone back to police officer)  
Lloyd: Wait! Hold on a second! (Hangs up the phone) I swear… I'm going to have to buy that boy a cork. _

Ashleigh: (Trying to pry a watery-eyed Lulu off of her arm) Can we go get food now?  
Kallen: (Doing the same thing- it's been a back and forth thing.) Starving!!  
Jordan: Please! (Looks around) Great... We've got three people to baby-sit.  
Ashleigh: Yeah... like drunken babies... (Pushes Lelouch off of her shoulder again) Can I PLEASE shove him into oncoming traffic!?  
Jordan: You'd better think it over at the Waffle House.  
Suzaku: (Hugging Lelouch) Suzaku heal!

(Finally at the House of Waffles!!)

(The five people sit at the bar at the Waffle House)  
Kallen: (Almost tips over from the seat's lack of a backrest.)  
Jordan: (Puts her hand on Suzaku's shoulder and points to the menu on the wall) Okay, Pretty Green Eyes. The menu's up there. Just pick what you want.  
Suzaku: (Stares blankly at the menu for a really long time.) (Suddenly looks dissatisfied.) Man... These strippers SUCK!! (Pushes Lelouch's shoulder) You... (Throws his hand towards the menu for emphasis) You get up there!!  
Lelouch: (Buries his face in his hands) What's the point! No one's ever a good tipper!  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Look at each other)  
Kallen: (Starts throwing loose change at Suzaku and Lelouch) Take it off!!  
Lelouch: (Covers his head with his arms) WE'RE UNDER FIRE!!  
Suzaku: (Looks around, unimpressed) (Spots a plate next to him and tosses a dollar bill at a piece of bacon.) Take it off!!  
Jordan: Ooookaaayy... We definitely have to sober these guys up.  
Ashleigh: (Holding Lelouch's mouth open with one hand an a fork-full of waffle in the other, shoving it down his throat.) I'm waaaayyy ahead of you.  
Lelouch: (Squirming) STOOOP IIIIT!!  
Ashleigh: Shut up and sober up!

(Later...)

(Eventually, after forcing waffles and coffee down his throat, Jordan and Ashleigh manage to get Lelouch partly sober.)  
Ashleigh: (Laying her head on the table) Man... That wore me out...  
Jordan: You're not kidding...  
Lelouch: (Holds a glass of ice-water to his forehead) This headache... God, where did it come from? And since when are we at the Waffle House? Last thing I remember, we were bowling and Suzaku went mentally insane...  
Jordan: (Groans and puts her head down on the table as well) It's a long story...  
Lelouch: It's a story I don't want to hear, isn't it?  
Ashleigh: Absolutely...  
Suzaku: (Spinning in his chair) Suzaku bored!!  
Lelouch: ... How long has Suzaku been referring to himself in the third person?  
Ashleigh: Since before, during, and after Karen knocked him unconscious for doing it...  
Jordan: (Pinches the bridge of her nose) And you think YOU have the headache.  
Suzaku: (Munches on ice cream and suddenly stops) Suzaku... (Throws his hands to his head) ... BRAIN FREEZE!!  
Ashleigh: (Stands up) That's it! Suzaku's SO getting to go play in traffic! (Charges at Suzaku)  
Jordan: (Holds her back) No, no! Hold on a second! He'll sober up eventually! ... I hope...  
Ashleigh: I can't take it anymore!! He's driving me crazy!  
Lelouch: It wasn't a long trip, was it?  
Ashleigh: You shut up or I swear I'll make you cry again!  
Lelouch: Again?  
Jordan: Ash, just calm down.  
Ashleigh: (Sits down and slams her head on the counter) Agh! Suzaku's never getting vodka again EVER! ... And neither are you! (Points at Lelouch)  
Lelouch: What? What did I ever do to you?  
Ashleigh: I can't handle all the crying and wailing! Ugh, we had to make sure you didn't go and kill yourself!  
Lelouch: Wha?  
Jordan: (Nods) Its' true...  
Suzaku: (Suddenly- to Lulu) Suzaku HUG!

_Lelouch: Get off of me!  
Suzaku: Lelouch... Changed?  
Jordan: Yeah, he sobered up.  
Ashleigh: Now you do the same! (Slaps him on the forehead) Heal!  
Suzaku: (Stares blankly at her) Suzaku's brain rattle... DO IT AGAIN!  
Jordan: That's it we are going home! (Grabs Kallen)  
(Kallen grabs Ashleigh, and Ashleigh grabs Lelouch, and Lelouch grabs Suzaku.)  
Suzaku: Wee! Suzaku TRAIN!!_

_(At Clubhouse after they take Kallen to her house…)_

_Jordan: I'm going to sleep… Wake me up and die!  
Ashleigh: Same goes for me!  
(Lelouch walks off to see if C.C is awake yet.)  
(…While Suzaku gets an idea…)  
Suzaku: Hehe… Suzaku sneaky!_

_(Only a few minutes later)_

_(Lelouch walks back into his room to find Suzaku in a frightening short kimono and fan in hand, lying on his bed.)  
Suzaku: SUZAKU POSE! (He lies down on his left side with his left leg stretched out and the right leg thrown over his left leg.)  
Lelouch: (Stares blankly for a minute and walks out) (Yelling from outside) SUZAKU GET OUT!!  
Suzaku: Awww… (Walks out of Lelouch's room with his head hanging down and passes him.)  
Lelouch: (Hand over his eyes with angry face, pointing down the hall to another room.)_

_(Around three in the morning…)_

_(Suzaku, still obviously drunk, sneaks back into Lelouch's room and gets into bed with him.)  
Suzaku: (Whispering) Suzaku spoon!_

(The next morning!!)

(Jordan and Ashleigh are slumped over the kitchen table, tired from the night before. C.C. strolls around looking for food. She miraculously doesn't have a hangover.)  
Ashleigh: C.C., how are you able to move?  
Jordan: Yeah, you blacked out twice.  
C.C.: Do you really need to ask that question?  
Ashleigh: No, not really…  
Jordan: It's going on noon, and the other two still haven't woken up yet… Wanna go get them?  
Ashleigh: Like we have a choice?

(Jordan and Ashleigh both grab two trays and stick a bottle of Tylenol in the middle of each of them.)  
Jordan: (Walks up to the door to Suzaku's guest room) (Knocks) Pretty Green Eyes… Wake up! Pretty Green Eyes? (Opens the door)  
(The room is empty.)  
Jordan: (Looks confused and walks further down the hall to where Ashleigh went) Hey, Suzaku's not in his room. Do you think he…?  
Ashleigh: (Standing frozen in front of the open door. Her tray tips due to her lack of attention and the bottle of pills rolls off of it and hits the floor.) Oh… my… Suzaku…  
Jordan: (Looks over her shoulder) What are you looking at? (She gasps and throws her hands over her mouth to not laugh) Holy crap!!  
(They just stand there and stare at Suzaku and Lelouch, curled up next to each other- Suzaku's arm slung over Lulu. After a few minutes Jordan and Ashleigh silently shut the door and stagger back into the kitchen.)  
Jordan: (Bursts out laughing and leans on the kitchen counter for support) Can you believe that!?  
Ashleigh: (Fell on her hands and knees because she was laughing so hard.) Holy god!!  
C.C.: What are you two laughing at?  
Jordan: (Points up the stairs) Go look!!  
(C.C. goes upstairs to the room. She peeks in and remarkably keeps a straight face. A smile slowly forms on her face.)  
C.C.: (Clasps her hands together) Adorable. (Goes back downstairs)  
Jordan: Did you see?  
C.C.: (Nods)  
Ashleigh: You didn't wake them up?  
C.C.: They curl like kittens. I couldn't bring myself to do it.

(About an hour later…)

(A loud boom is heard upstairs)  
Ashleigh: (Stands up) Did you hear that?  
Jordan: (Watching TV) Hear what?  
Ashleigh: I swear I just heard a bang come from upstairs…  
Jordan: I didn't hear anything…  
Ashleigh: (Goes upstairs anyway. She cautiously opens the door.)  
Suzaku: (Still sound asleep.)  
Lelouch: (Sprawled out on the floor in a mound of blankets with a look of pure horror on his face.)  
Ashleigh: … How did you end up on the floor?  
Lelouch: (Looks up, wide-eyed.) I don't know anymore…  
Suzaku: (Moves his arm around, searching the spot where Lelouch used to be.) (Still asleep) … Where'd he go…?  
Ashleigh: (Nods) Yeah… Sure… (Walks away)  
Lelouch: (Scrambles out the door) You can't just leave me here!

Owari!! (Finally!)

XxX

**Author's Notes-** Sheesh… Stupendously long chapter!! We've been planning this chapter since chapter 8 was posted so it's really good to finally get to write it! In case you couldn't tell, each character has their own different personality whilst intoxicated. To list:

Kallen: The rowdy drunk. (This didn't get exploited as much as the others.)  
C.C.: Completely the same. (The only way you can tell she's drunk is when she passes out.)  
Suzaku: The slutty drunk! (He gets a little loose... Haha! And talks in the third person.)  
Lelouch: The depressed drunk. (The most annoying of them all!)

_**Author's Notes-**__ Candice and Karen are our friends that wanted an appearance, and I really, REALLY want to see Suzaku drunk!_

**And I really, really don't,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter:**Birthday Surprise!  
(Summary: It's Lulu's birthday and with the two of us hanging around, there are several surprises lurking around every corner!)


	11. Birthday Surprise!

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… **

**Author's Notes-** I don't have anything to say… Except that this chapter... well... doesn't exactly live up to the previous one… And sorry for taking so long. I guess we really didn't want to even attempt to step out of Ch. 10's shadow.

(EDIT: Whoever you are, oOboredOo (If I got the configuration right...), I actually got the e-mail for your review just as I was about to update... Pretty ironic, really.)

_**Author's Notes-**_ _Oh, I've been meaning to say this... Thanks Senorita Lucha 777 for my new stuffed animal! I love it. I figured out this weekend that Suzaku drives a Green Suzuki... And for future reference, if I say Prince Clueless, I mean Prince Clovis La(lala!) Britannia!_

xXx

At the Clubhouse!!

(Monday- Around 8 A.M….)

(Jordan, Ashleigh, and C.C. are sneaking up the stairs.)  
Jordan: (Whispering) Is everything ready?  
Ashleigh: (Also whispering) Suzaku and the others will take care of it…  
Jordan: Okie-dokie!  
(The three creep into an upstairs room and gather at the foot of a bed, wicked grins on their faces.)  
Lelouch: (Asleep… and unfortunately oblivious)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Suddenly yank the covers off of him)  
C.C.: (Gets about three inches from his nose and stares at him intently)  
Lelouch: (Covers his head with the pillow; annoyed)  
(C.C. takes away the pillow while the other two leap onto the bed and start jumping on it.)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: Wake up!!  
Lelouch: (Tries his best not to open his eyes and starts kicking at the two bouncing loudspeakers.)  
Jordan: (Stops jumping and pokes Ashleigh) (Whispers something)  
Ashleigh: (Follows Jordan out of the room)  
C.C.: (Keeps staring… She notices the awkward look on his face and gets an idea.) (Puts her pinky finger in her mouth and immediately sticks it in his ear.)  
Lelouch: (Leaps two feet in the air, grabbing his ear.) Ahhh!! What the hell was that!?  
C.C.: (Waves her extended pinky in the air in front of her still expressionless face.)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Return with a bucket of ice, some salt, and a CD that contains the CaramellDansen)  
Jordan: Damn, we're too late!  
Ashleigh: (Thinks for a moment, watching the other two… then laughs.) That's classic, C.C.!  
Lelouch: (Still rubbing his ear) It's twisted and cruel.  
Ashleigh: (Ignores him and holds up the ice and salt.) Common, Jordan, I'm making Ice Cream! (She leaves)  
Jordan: (Follows her) Out of only ice and salt!?

_(C.C and __Lelouch__ follow them out)  
Lelouch: What are you making Ice cream for, anyways?  
C.C: I can't believe you've forgotten.  
Lelouch: Forgotten what?  
(As they walk into the kitchen it's dark…)  
Lelouch: (Flips on the light switch)  
Everyone: SURPRISE! (Jordan, Ashleigh, Nunnally, Kallen, Millay, and Rivalz all pop out from some place in the kitchen.)  
(A huge Purple and green cake stands in the middle of the kitchen with the words "HAPPY BIRTHDAY LULU!" written on it, and single four-feet by three-feet box lies in the middle of the table with sparkling blue wrapping paper on it.)  
C.C: How can you possible forget your own birthday?  
Lelouch: I guess you guys CAN be pretty nice when you want to…  
Millay: (Singing) Happy Birthday to you-  
(Everyone joins in)  
(Last verse)  
Everyone: Happy Birthday to you… (Holding out the "You…)  
(A muffled male voice joins in at the end)  
Voice: OUUUUUUUUUU-!!  
(Then all of a sudden Suzaku pops out of the huge cake in a sparkling blue dress, to match the wrapping paper on the present, and a feather boa.) HAPPY BIRTHDAY LELOUCH!  
Lelouch: (Jumps back, scared to death) How the hell did they convince you to do that!?  
Suzaku: Money.  
Lelouch: How much did they pay you?  
Suzaku: A lot.  
Ashleigh: (Brings in a boom box and starts playing stripper music.)  
Rivalz: I'm outta here! (Runs off)  
Suzaku: HEY! (Trying to climb out of the cake as graceful as he possibly can in his dress.) I never agreed to that!  
Ashleigh: Ugh, fine! (Turns of music)  
Jordan: Rivalz, it's ok to come back in!  
C.C: Here Lelouch. A present from all of us. (Hands him the blue box.)  
Lelouch: (A little hesitant, unwraps the present to find a three-feet by two-feet box. He unwraps it to find a two-feet by one-foot box. A little annoyed, now opens the box to finds a one-foot by half a foot box. He finally gets to the present to find a make-shift cape made out of newspapers.) What… is this?  
Ashleigh: Well… you see… we didn't have enough money to pay for a real present…  
Jordan: We spent all the money on Suzaku…!!  
Lelouch: Nunnally, surely you got me something better?  
Nunnally: Nope, I helped chip in for Suzaku, __Big Brother.__  
Suzaku: I told you they paid me a lot! (Stuffing his face with the real cake he found in the fridge.)  
Ashleigh: And this is only part of it!  
Jordan: We have something planed for you everyday, Lelouch!  
Ashleigh: This was just your first surprise!_

Lelouch: (Frightened) What?  
Jordan: Yep! This is nothing compared to the rest of the week!  
Ashleigh: And it's going to be hell- so brace yourself!  
C.C.: (Messing around with the balloons, accidentally lets the air out of one of them.) (High-pitched helium voice!) Is there going to be any- whoa…  
Rivalz: (Starts laughing and grabs another balloon.) (He inhales practically the entire capacity of the balloon and starts singing 'Happy Birthday' again- but in Spanish.)  
(Everyone just stares as he keeps singing.)  
Suzaku: Huh… Rivalz knew Spanish… You learn something knew every day…  
Milly: (Messes with the sequins on Suzaku's dress) Yeah, and Suzaku has a bit of a fetish for wearing dresses!  
Suzaku: (Reels back) Hey!  
C.C.: (Took in more helium) It's completely blatant.  
Rivalz: (Finished with his song- but still helium-induced) What she said!  
Jordan: (Reaches inside the cake Suzaku came out of) Hey! Pretty Green Eyes! You're not wearing part of your costume! (Pulls out a silver tiara)  
Kallen: (Tries not to laugh because she stood too close to Rivalz and C.C. and inhaled some of the helium)  
Suzaku: (Crosses his arms) Because I'm not wearing a tiara!  
Ashleigh: Don't you think it's a bit late to be worried about your masculinity, Mr. Flapper Girl?  
Suzaku: (Flips the boa over his shoulder defiantly) Say what you want, this dress looks damn good on me!  
Jordan: If we hang him from the ceiling we could use him as a disco ball!  
Suzaku: (Snaps his fingers at Jordan) I'm no accessory!  
Ashleigh: Alrighty then… (Grabs Suzaku's shoulders and pulls him away from C.C. and Rivalz) Let's get Suzaku out of the fumes for a bit, kay?  
Lelouch: (Staring into space) I'm going to have nightmares about this scene.  
Milly: Who isn't?  
Kallen: Suzaku.  
Suzaku: (Fiddling with the end of the boa) Huh?

_(TUESDAY!)_

_Lelouch: (Wakes up very late in the morning, he walks to his bathroom) Ashleigh! Jordan! Why is there a llama in the bathroom!?  
Jordan: (Calling from down the hall) 'Cause the ducks didn't wanna be in there, stupid!  
Ashleigh: (Yelling from downstairs) And it's not a lama it's an alpaca!  
Suzaku: (Running up the stairs) I wanna see the lama!  
Ashleigh: ALPACA!  
__Lelouch__: Wait… did you say something about ducks?? (He walks downstairs)  
(When Lelouch reaches the third step a 120 pound Golden Retriever tramples him to the ground and licks his face.)  
Jordan: TOBEY! Get off Lulu! (She shoves Tobey off him.)  
(Jordan puts a leash on Tobey and ties him to the banister.)  
(Ashleigh walks in and sets a ten pound black and white Chihuahua down on the ground.)  
(The Chihuahua runs for Lulu and grabs onto his leg…)  
Ashleigh: (Laughing on the floor) Looks like Oreo found a new friend! He loves you in all the wrong ways!  
Suzaku: (Walking down the stairs with the Alpaca) Oh sure! The dog gets too. (Walks away, disgusted.)  
Lelouch: (Shoves Oreo off of him and stands up waving his hands.) He... He's LYING! I swear!  
(A horse comes around the corner with C.C. ridding on it backwards with her legs propped up and reading a book.)  
Lelouch: WHAT IS GOING ON ANYWAY!?  
Ashleigh: Your second birthday present!  
Jordan: It's a zoo!  
Kallen: (Her and Milly walk through the front door) You guys know that there's a __Chinchilla__ in your tree outside right?  
Jordan: (Gasp) No one told me we had a Chinchilla! (Runs to get it)  
Suzaku: (Still with the alpaca, now brushing it.) Hey, if you guys have all these animals then… what did you do with Arthur?  
Milly: He's outside with the other cats.  
Ashleigh: (Looking out the window) Awww, they're playing follow the leader. Looks like Arthur's in charge…_

Everyone Else: (Looks out the window as well)  
(A battalion of kitty-cats sit at attention facing the same direction- Arthur sitting on a stump and licking his paws.)  
Ashleigh: (Sarcastically) Where have I seen THIS before…?  
Oreo: (The Chihuahua starts barking for no apparent reason at the curtains and runs around, leaping from chair to chair)  
Ashleigh: (Grabs Oreo) Oreo, shut up!! (Tosses him out the door without a second thought)  
Suzaku: Doesn't that hurt him!?  
Ashleigh: Relax, that dog runs into walls on his own accord.  
Jordan: (Back from falling out of the tree a few times, now has the Chinchilla!) That and Dustin throws him across the room and turns him upside down!  
Tobey: (Decides to be destructive and breaks the railing, charging towards all the people)  
Ashleigh: (Runs) MOOSE-DOG ATTACK!!  
Jordan: TOBEY!  
Tobey: (Runs around excitingly- sticking in nose in everyone's crotch like he normally does…)  
Kallen, Milly, Lelouch, and Suzaku: (Freak and/or feel extremely uncomfortable and violated)  
Jordan: (Sits on Tobey like he's a pony. He just lies down from laziness.) Sorry, he does that sometimes.  
Ashleigh: (Standing on the couch) Try all the time!  
Lelouch: Get off of the furniture!  
Ashleigh: (Looks out the window again) Hey… I think Arthur told all of the cats to gang up against Oreo… They're surrounding him.  
Jordan: (Runs to the window) We have to go get him, he's too little!!  
Ashleigh: No way! I wanna see this!  
Jordan: (Goes outside) Poor doggie!  
Kallen: You seem a bit cruel with the Chihuahua.  
Ashleigh: Nah… He's a masochist.  
Everyone but Milly: (Looks at her like 'You've got to be kidding…')  
Milly: (Starts laughing hysterically)  
Ashleigh: You think I'm lying don't you?

_Lelouch: That's it… I'm going back to my room.  
(He walks up stairs and slips into bed again, but this time he feels something furry along his leg. He flips the covers up and yells out the window.)  
Lelouch: JORDAN YOUR CHINCHILLA IS IN MY BED!  
Jordan:(Jumps up and lets Oreo drop to the ground.) CHINCHILLA!_

_(WEDNESDAY!)_

_(Milly and Kallen and Rivals all came into the Clubhouse early to see what Lelouch's surprise for that day was.)  
Milly: Hey, have you guys ever noticed the lamp being in the left corner of the living room before?  
Kallen: You know now that you mention it sense when had the T.V. been in front of the window?  
Rivalz: You guys are observant.  
(Ashleigh, C.C., and Suzaku all walk downstairs)  
Milly: Hey Ashleigh, have you ever noticed someone moving the lamp?  
Ashleigh: Nope...  
C.C.: (Suspicious) Where's Jordan?  
Ashleigh: Doing our daily routine... uh- I mean showering.  
Lelouch: (From upstairs) Ouch!  
Suzaku: Lelouch are you okay?  
Lelouch: (Hopping downstairs holding his foot) No I just kicked the dresser. I never noticed how far over to the left it was.  
Kallen: Wait why is everything to the left all of a sudden?  
Jordan: (Pops out of freakin nowhere.) Who said it was all of a sudden?  
Ashleigh: (Runs over to cover Jordan's mouth.) Shh!!  
C.C.: (Realized what's going on) You two are brilliant. (Sits down on couch)  
Rivalz: Someone tell me what's going on!?_

Ashleigh: (Sigh) Since Jordan had to go and ruin it…  
Suzaku: (Yelling from the kitchen) Why is the table so close to the refrigerator!?  
Ashleigh: Every day, Jordan and I move everything in the Clubhouse two centimeters to the left!  
C.C.: Since it's so subtle, no one would've noticed.  
Lelouch: You two find the simplest things and make them torturous.  
Jordan: It's our specialty!  
Kallen: (Inspects the wall) Even all the pictures have been moved!  
Milly: (Looks as well) Look at all of these holes in the wall. According to this, everything in the Clubhouse has been moved half of a meter to the left!  
Suzaku: Half of a meter!? That seems like a lot, but we just noticed today??  
Ashleigh: That's because two centimeters ISN'T a lot! They accumulate, you know.  
Lelouch: But what did you do with everything on the left side of the room?  
Jordan: We put it in the closet! (Opens the closet door and a stampede of hamsters in bright orange hamster toys fall out)  
Suzaku: What the heck is that!?  
Jordan: Oh, no… I think we forgot about the hamsters!!  
Ashleigh: (Jumps on the couch again) AH! MY ORANGES!!  
(A wave of orange moves across the floor.)  
C.C.: (Opens the front door and they all roll out in some kind of formation.)  
(No one really knows what to say)  
Lelouch: (Sits on the couch and rests his head in his hands) It's going to be a long week, isn't it?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Pat him on the head) Correct!

To be continued…

XxX

**Author's Notes-** Yeah, this chapter pales in comparison with Chapter Ten, but then again, don't they all? By the way, the 'Ah, my oranges!' thing is just a little messing with Orange-Kun. Haha! I have no pictures of Oreo either… He's just a Chihuahua with floppy ears… and really dumb.

_**Author's Notes- **__Here's a picture of a Chinchilla!_  
media(dot)photobucket(dot)com(slash)image(slash)chinchilla(slash)sex(underscore)kitten(dash)11(dash)4(slash)chinchilla(dot)jpg?o(equals)26

_I have no pictures of Tobey, except when he weighed 10 pounds… Sorry!_

**Just add 110 more!**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter:** Thursday and Friday of this Birthday Escapade!  
(Summary: Honestly... we have no idea... Any ideas?)


	12. Birthday Surprise! Part Two

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Walmart… or Skittles… or Twenty Q… or Beanie Babies…**

**Author's Notes-** I don't have much to say today… except this chapter is the return of Random Terrorist #1 and Random Terrorist #2! Haha, they're my favourite characters. (And to Senorita Lucha 777… be patient! We have two days left! I hope you like how we worked it in!)

_**Author's Notes-**_ _I ran out of ideas so…we're going to Walmart!_

xXx

_(It's a beautiful Thursday afternoon. The sun is shinning, the birds are singing and Cecile is running through the doors of the Clubhouse in a frantic panic.)_

_Cecile: Suzaku! Suzaku!  
(Suzaku comes around corner with a french fry in his mouth.)  
Suzaku: Hmm? __Ms. __Cecile?  
Cecile: Suzaku, The Lancelot is being impounded!  
Suzaku: How is that possible?  
(Jordan walks around the corner)  
Cecile: Apparently you parked it in front of a fire hydrant!  
(Jordan turns right back around and walks away)  
Suzaku: JORDAN!  
Jordan: Ashleigh! Ashleigh! Help me! Suzaku is after me!  
Ashleigh: What did you do?  
Jordan: I parked the Lancelot in front of a fire hydrant!  
Ashleigh: No way, I helped you when you ran that stop sign! You're on your own this time!  
(Lelouch walks around corner)  
Jordan: Lulu! Protect me. Suzaku is after me!  
(Jordan grabs Lelouch and stands behind him)  
Ashleigh: Yeah, like that's gonna do you a whole lot of good. It's like blocking yourself from a missile with an apple.  
Lelouch: What's that supposed to mean!?  
Ashleigh: Hmm, that gives me an idea for today's surprise…  
Jordan: You mean we didn't have one planned out?  
Ashleigh: Nope.  
C.C.: (Walks into whatever room the others are in) Well, that's a surprise.  
Lelouch: Tell me about it.  
Ashleigh: Follow me!  
(They all walk out of the room except Jordan)  
Jordan: (Confused look on her face) You mean we were just gonna wing it today!?  
(No answer. She snaps back from her Lala Land and realizes everyone left.)  
Jordan: Hey, wait for me!_

_(__WALMART__!!)_

_  
Lelouch: Why are we here?  
Ashleigh: Well, I figured it would be a nice place to come and hang out and maybe- just maybe- if you're a good boy well get you a nicer birthday present. Plus, I just needed to go grocery shopping.  
(Jordan heads off to where they sell fabric and buys a whole lot of purple furry fabric with an evil grin on her face.)  
(C.C. heads for the toys and starts pushing all the ones that make noise until it sounds like a jungle.)  
(Suzaku, after yelling at Jordan the entire car ride there, of course, goes for the gun and ammunition section.)_

Ashleigh: (Takes a running start with the shopping cart and jumps onto the back- riding it down the aisle.)  
Lelouch: (Mortified, follows at a reasonable distance to where he can claim he doesn't know her.) Could you act like someone with normal mental abilities for a change?  
Ashleigh: (Stops) You wanna ride in the basket?  
Lelouch: Not really.  
(Meanwhile, C.C. finds a Twenty Questions and tries to beat it.)  
Suzaku: (Walking around aimlessly and stumbles across the Halloween section.) Hmm… (Spots something and he beams. He grabs it.) I'm getting this!  
(C.C. gets bored of beating 20 Q, and goes off to search for everyone else.)  
(Jordan and Suzaku run into each other in the store)  
Jordan: (Hides the fabric) Uh- Hi Pretty Green Eyes!  
Suzaku: (Hides what he found behind his back as well) Hey.  
Both: (At the same time) What's that?  
Jordan: Uh… I don't know what you're-  
Suzaku: Oh, nothing too important…  
(They both eye each other suspiciously… but walk around to find the others anyway.)  
(In the parking lot…)  
Ashleigh: (Gets to the car with two bags in her hands. Turns around.) Hurry up!!  
Lelouch: (Struggles to stand straight, toting seven bags. He tips to the right a bit because the weight is unbalanced.) Why did I have to carry so many!?  
Ashleigh: Cry about it, pansy… and don't drop the eggs! Oh yeah, and don't get… run over either…. That would be bad.  
Lelouch: (Drops the bags in the trunk- out of breath)  
Jordan: (Runs up from out of nowhere) What'd ya get me? What's ya get me?  
Ashleigh: Nothing! Let's go!  
C.C.: (Looks at Suzaku's bag) What did you buy, Suzaku?  
Suzaku: (Clutches the bag) Nothing…

_(Back at the Clubhouse…)  
Jordan: (Putting up groceries) Ash, how come you didn't get Skittles?  
Ashleigh: I did. Can you not find them?_

_Jordan: No…  
Lelouch: I hid them.  
Jordan: WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT!?  
Lelouch: We all know what happened the last time.  
C.C.: Except Suzaku. By the way, where is he?  
Ashleigh: I'm not sure… but he did seem suspicious.  
Jordan: That reminds me. Lelouch, do you have a sewing machine around here?  
Lelouch: I think there's one in the attic. Why?  
Ashleigh: Is it really safe to ask her that?  
C.C.: Hmm… where did you put the coffee?  
Jordan: We have coffee!? (Grabs three bags of coffee and her fabric and runs upstairs.)_

_(…After about four hours…)  
(Jordan's creation is complete!)  
(She has a huge purple fur coat, especially made for the Lancelot. She sneaks outside and puts it on the huge robot.)  
Lelouch: (Heard the door open and walks outside to see what it was.) Who's there?  
Jordan: Lulu! (High off of caffeine, she jumps on his back.) Give me my Skittles Lulu!  
Lelouch: Get off of me!  
Jordan: (Jumps down) WEEEEEEE! (Runs inside)  
Lelouch: ASHLEIGH! COME AND GET YOUR FRIEND!_

Jordan: (Runs around inside- burning some energy)  
Ashleigh: (Walking up the stairs) I'm busy…  
Lelouch: (Annoyed) Busy doing what?  
Ashleigh: (Stops at the top- thinking) Uh… Yeah, I got nothing. Good luck! (Runs down the hall)  
Jordan: (Starts making strange noises to a beat)  
C.C.: (Walks into the room and stares at Jordan, slightly amused.)  
Lelouch: (Clenches his jaw and walks away)

(Later while everyone is asleep… or at least pretending to be…)

Jordan: (Wide awake, bouncing on her bed, bored.) Hmm… I wonder where my Skittles are hidden?? (Sneaks out of her room into the dark hallway.)  
(It's pitch black and there are no lights on anywhere. Jordan tiptoes around until her eyes catch something at the end of the hallway. To bright green circles float motionlessly against the wall.)  
Jordan: (Freezes) (Whispers) Who's there?  
(The circles flash and shift a little)  
Jordan: (Silently moves towards the closest door and goes inside. She runs to the side of the bed and pokes Ashleigh.) Ash, wake up!  
Ashleigh: (Tired and pissed off) What??  
Jordan: (Points to the door) There's something in the hallway!  
Ashleigh: What are you bloody talking about?  
Jordan: (Drags her to the door)  
(The door slowly opens and the two peer down the hallway.)  
(The two dots are now closer than they were when Jordan went in.)  
Jordan: (Whispers) They moved!!  
Ashleigh: (Squints her eyes and whispers) What the duce…? (The circles flash again) Wait a minute…  
Jordan: (Clings to Ash's arm- whispering) I told you I'm afraid of the dark!  
Ashleigh: (Shakes her off) Hold on a second. (Goes across and up the hall a ways and knocks on the door. The door opens after a moment or so.)  
Lelouch: (Angry) What do you want?  
Ashleigh: (Grabs his sleeve and yanks him into the hall completely.) What is that? (Points to the green circles.)  
Lelouch: (Pauses and stares for a while.) (Talking rather loudly) … Suzaku?  
(A light thud is heard before a hushed "Damn!")  
Jordan: (Whips out her cellphone and opens it towards the lights. The light from the screen lands on Suzaku- crouching on the ground.) Pretty Green Eyes!?  
Ashleigh: (Throws something at him) Dammit, Suzaku! What the hell are you doing?? And what's with that outfit!?  
Suzaku: (Stands up- showing that he is wearing a ninja Halloween Costume but with a Lucha mask.) (-I believe a Lucha mask is a brightly coloured wrestling mask, right? So basically, it's a colourful vinyl ski mask… I think.-)  
Lelouch: What the hell is on your face?  
Suzaku: (Takes off the mask) I found it in the kitchen… It had come in the mail! But I don't know why or from whom… And I bought my costume at the store today!  
Jordan: Why are you in the hallway trying to scare people like that!?  
Suzaku: I just wanted to see if the costume made me incognito!  
Ashleigh: It doesn't really work when your eyes glow in the dark, now does it??  
Suzaku: (Looks confused) What?

_Lelouch: Suzaku… Your eyes… glow!  
Jordan: (Now opening and closing his eyes with her fingers.) This puts a whole new meaning to the name __Pretty Green Eyes__…  
Lelouch: It's like looking at glow-sticks…  
Suzaku: No way! (Runs to look in a mirror.)  
Ashleigh: I'm going back to bed…_

_(Friday morning!)_

_  
(Everyone came over to have breakfast!)  
Milly: So, what did you guys do yesterday for Lelouch's birthday week?  
C.C.: Grocery shopping.  
Kallen: That's all?  
Ashleigh: We really didn't have anything planed out…  
Rivalz: No way! You're joking!  
Jordan: In fact, do we really have anything planed for today?  
Ashleigh: I don't... Any one have any ideas before he gets back home?  
Suzaku: (Walks in) Hey Jordan, I found your Skittles under my bed. (Hands her the bag)  
Jordan: Why that clever little- …I don't care what we do today, but I want revenge for hiding my Skittles!_

Ashleigh: Yeah, sure, but… what did you have in mind?  
Jordan: (Thinks for a minute) Oh! How about we tie-dye the cape!  
Ashleigh: (Shakes her head) No, no! You will not disturb the glory!!  
Rivalz: What cape? What glory? What are you talking about?  
Milly: What else is there?  
Ashleigh: (Thinks) Oh my Suzaku! I completely forgot! (Whispers to Jordan)  
Jordan: Ah! I forgot about that too! (Stands up with her fist pumped) Let's do it!  
Kallen: (Shivers) Why do _I_ feel uneasy about this…?

(Later that night…)

(Lelouch is sneaking out of the backdoor of the Clubhouse when Ash and Jordan suddenly pop out in front of him.)  
Jordan: What'cha doin'??  
Lelouch: Me? What are you doing!?  
Ashleigh: Following you.  
Jordan: Obviously.  
Lelouch: Alright, let me rephrase… Why!?  
Ashleigh: (Looks at Jordan) We need a reason?  
Jordan: (Shrugs)  
Lelouch: (Brushes past them) I have somewhere to be, you know!  
Jordan: (Waves) See you there!

(At the Order of the Black Knights, Jordan and Ashleigh somehow- miraculously- beat him there.)  
Jordan: (Handing out something to everyone) One for you… and you… oh, and you!  
Ashleigh: (Sitting on a table, scribbling something in a notebook)  
Lelouch: (As Zero) What is going on?  
Jordan: (Still handing out things) Stuff!  
Ashleigh: (Tapping the pencil) We're having an intervention to update the image.  
Lelouch: What image? What are you two up to now?!  
Ashleigh: (Ignores him) Kallen!  
Kallen: (Walks up) What is it?  
Jordan: (Shoves the package into her arms) And here's yours!  
Kallen: (Opens the package and pulls out another jacket identical to the one she's wearing except there's a big 01 on the back with "KALLEN" written above it.) This is…?  
Ashleigh: A new jacket! See, they're like sports' jerseys.  
Kallen: So I'm O-1?  
Jordan: (Nods) Uh-huh!  
Lelouch: You've got to be kidding me.  
Jordan: Nope! (Points around) See, everyone has one!  
Ashleigh: Even you!  
Lelouch: What?  
Jordan: (Turns him around and pats his back) Right here!  
(There is no name- just a giant 0.)  
Lelouch: (Pulls the cape around to see it) This is ridiculous…  
Ashleigh: Actually, it's a stroke of genius. If you had the right mindset, of course.  
Lelouch: You mean the mindset of someone deserving of a mental institution?  
Jordan: That's not very nice.

_C.C.: I kind of like these. (Hers is, of course, white with C.2. written on the back)  
Lelouch: Why would you guys even do this?  
Ashleigh: Revenge.  
Lelouch: For what!?  
Jordan: You hid my Skittles! (Points a finger right in his face.)  
Random Terrorist #1: Hey Zero! If out names are written on the back won't that be kindda obvious as to who we are?  
Kallen: I don't think Zero really had any say in this.  
Random Terrorist #2: Mine's too big!  
Lelouch: Shut up! Give your jackets back to them! We're not using them!  
Ashleigh: Do you know how much these cost us!  
Lelouch: Then how did you pay for them?  
Jordan: Umm… Well you see we kindda… had to dig into the Ammunition Budget...  
Lelouch: What?!  
Ashleigh: Yeah, you won't be fitting Britannia with anything but slingshots for at least a month.  
Lelouch: RETURN THEM AND GET THE MONEY BACK!! (Now facing his army.) Everyone return that jacket!  
(Everyone hands them over except...)  
Lelouch: C.C.!!  
C.C.: No way, I'm keeping mine._

(Back at the Clubhouse…)

(Everyone walks into the room from different directions to seem inconspicuous- but at the same time so it doesn't really work.)  
Suzaku: (Sitting on the couch with a book) Where have you guys been?  
Ashleigh: Uh… Engl-  
Jordan: CHINCHILLA!!  
(Everyone stares at her)  
Suzaku: Right…  
Ashleigh: Common, Jordan. I want to show you something that Candice sent me.  
Jordan: Okie dokie!  
(They leave)

(A few minutes later)  
Ashleigh: (Practically kicks the door in) Attention!  
Suzaku and Lelouch: (Startled)  
Ashleigh: (Holds her hands high in the air) Jordan and I have just- literally- destroyed Britannia!  
Suzaku: (Jumps up) What??  
Jordan: (Runs in) We're not lying either!  
Lelouch: (Puts his face in his hands) How could you two possibly manage-?  
Ashleigh: (Holds out her hand) This!  
(The two look at what appears to be a decapitated stuffed bear.)  
Lelouch: Oh god, what is that?  
Suzaku: I have no idea…  
Jordan: (Holds our her hand as well) Here's the rest! (It's the body)  
Ashleigh: See, Candice sent me this beanie baby she had. Its name is Britannia. Look at the tag if you think I'm kidding!  
(They look at the TY tag. Sure enough, its name is Britannia.)  
Jordan: Didn't she say not to destroy it, though?  
Ashleigh: She should've known better.  
Jordan: True… I want Skittles! (Runs away)  
Lelouch: (Examining the tag, snaps out of it and runs after her) How did you find them!?

Owari!

XxX

**Author's Notes-** If Candice doesn't take her bear back I really am going to destroy it! Anyway, this chapter was sort of thrown together on a whim…

_**Author's Notes- **__I'm going to start my own show! Pimp Out Your Knightmare!_

**That's not such a bad idea…**

_**-Destiny**_

**Instead of a Summary:** (We were thinking. If anyone liked the Pimp My Knightmare idea, we're considering starting another fanfic. Kind of like a side-project, you know? If we get enough support, we'll try it out!)


	13. Birthday Surprise! Part Three Finale

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Sprite… or Punch Buggies… or Baywatch… or Skittles…**

**Author's Notes-** Terribly sorry for taking so long… Life is pretty hectic at the moment, with Theater and whatnot… Performance is in one week so we should be back to our normal pace by then!

The Third and Final Part of 'Birthday Surprise!'

_**Author's Notes-**_ _Sorry we haven't updated in a while… We're busy with school. Oh, and I have A FanFic account now! BubbleGumOfLondon! ... SKITTLES!_

xXx

(Early Saturday morning at the Clubhouse…)

'BAM!'  
Lelouch: (Wakes up from something heavy landing on top of him. His eyes open to confetti of his wardrobe raining down towards him.)  
Three Female Voices: (Differentiating between 'Hurry up!' and 'Wake up!')  
Lelouch: What the hell are you doing now!?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Rummaging through clothes) Packing, of course!  
Lelouch: For what!?  
C.C.: (Throwing random items into the suitcase- which sits on top of him.) Somewhere.  
Lelouch: (Sighs) Could you be any more vague?  
Jordan: You bet! (Something catches her eye) Huh? What's this? (Pulls out a frilly dress and holds it up under her chin) Hm…  
Ashleigh: (Stares) I can't be the only one with questions…  
Lelouch: Wha- That's… That's Nunnally's! Sayako must've put it here by mistake!  
Jordan: (Spins) Riiiiight… (Hands it to C.C.) What do you think?  
C.C.: (Examines it and shakes her head.) Liar… (Tosses it to the suitcase)  
Jordan: We're definitely taking that!  
Ashleigh: (Pulls out one of the many capes hidden throughout the room) We'll need one of these, too.  
Lelouch: Would you three explain what it is you're plotting!!

_Ashleigh: Fine! If you MUST spoil the surprise.  
Jordan: We're goin' to the beach!  
Lelouch: We'll I- (Decides not to fight it) …suppose it is a good idea to take a break every once in a while. I'll just need to contact everyone that the mission is-  
C.C: It's already been done. (Still packing)  
Lelouch: I should have known. You guys think of everything when it comes to these things. Let me see if I can stump you on this one: How are we getting there?  
Ashleigh: Car.  
Lelouch: …Who's driving!?  
Jordan: Hi Lulu! (Evil/Hyper wave)_

_(At the car…)  
Suzaku: Man… how did you guys manage to rent a Hummer??_

Jordan: (Classic Anime Sweat-drop) Uh…  
Lelouch: (Facepalm)  
Ashleigh: Suzaku… no… just no…  
Suzaku: (Blinks) What? What did I say?  
Ashleigh: (Pats the car's hood) This!  
Jordan: Is a Punch Buggy!  
Suzaku: A… punch buggy…?  
C.C.: (Lightly punches Suzaku's arm) Silver. (Reels back and punches Lelouch's arm with great force)  
Lelouch: (Grabs his arm in pain) What the hell was that for!?  
C.C.: (Points to the car) Silver…  
Jordan: (Grits her teeth) It's not silver… It's GRAY DAMMIT, GRAY!!  
Lelouch, Suzaku, and C.C.: (Stare at Jordan)  
Suzaku: (Leans towards Ashleigh, not taking his eyes from Jordan) Do we… want to know?  
Ashleigh: (Slams the trunk) No, not really.

_Jordan: Just get in the car.  
Lelouch: I'm not sure if I want to.  
(C.C and Ash look at each other then C.C. picks Lulu up by his left arm and Ash picks him up by his right arm and they throw him in the back seat face-first.)  
Lelouch: Hey, you didn't have to do that!_

_(On the way to the beach…)  
Suzaku: (Singing along to the music...)  
C.C.: (Munching on the spare pizzas they packed.)  
Ashleigh: (Staring out of the window and helping Jordan navigate.)  
Lelouch: (Nervous and yelling at Jordan to keep her eyes on the road.)  
Jordan: (Messing with her iPod.)_

(At the hotel… Yes hotel, not motel)  
C.C.: Ashleigh. Jordan.  
Jordan and Ashleigh: Yes? (Both throw their bags towards Lelouch and Suzaku. Suzaku catches one with no problem, but due to Jordan packing her bags as full as physically possible, Lelouch goes crumbling to the ground.)  
C.C.: I didn't see a single Pizza Shop on the way here. I thought you guys would at least think of my feelings when planning this. (Pout)  
Ashleigh: C.C., that's because there's a pizza shop inside the hotel next to the arcade.  
C.C.: Really? …I love you guys. (Leans over and hugs both of them.)  
Strange yet familiar voice: Jordan. Ashleigh.  
(Both girls turn around.)  
Ashleigh and Jordan: ADAME-SENPAI!

Jordan: Why are you here??  
Adame-Senpai: Oh, I'm just leaving you know. I only came for the Deathklok concert.  
Ashleigh: We should've guessed.  
Suzaku: Hold on. Who is this?  
Jordan: It's Adame-Senpai!  
Adame: I have forbid you to call me that!  
Ashleigh: So?  
Adame: (Sigh)  
Jordan: Do you want to join us for lunch, Adame?  
Adame: That depends.  
C.C.: …Pizza…  
Suzaku: Yes, yes… We're going to get pizza…  
Adame: Why don't you just make your own pizza…  
Jordan: We don't have the ingredients, dummy.  
Adame: Then steal it.  
Suzaku: What? No! Pizza-  
Adame: -Obtained by detestable means won't taste good at all!  
Jordan and Ashleigh: Here we go again…  
Suzaku: Huh?  
Adame: That's what you WANTED to say, isn't it?  
Lelouch: That does sound like something he'd say.  
Suzaku: You're not helping.  
Adame: But that is YOUR will! For it is the will of the PIZZA that truly matters!  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Filling in) I killed the man that made this pizza!!  
Adame: Fine! If you will not give me the pizza, I shall take a mere SLICE!  
Ashleigh: See, the pizza is a metaphor for Japan…  
Adame: Now that THAT'S over… (Leaves)  
Jordan: Wait! Adame-Senpai!  
Suzaku: (Goes towards the door) Hold on. (Leaves too)  
(The other four look at each other confusedly. From down the hall, they hear Adame yelling "What? No, no! OW!!")  
Everyone: (Exchange glances)  
Suzaku: (Walks back in, dusting off his hands) I feel better.  
Adame: (From far away) You are not a just god!!

_Lelouch: So, how long are we staying here anyway?  
Jordan: Poor Adame-Senpai…  
Ashleigh: Today and Sunday.  
C.C.: Don't you remember Lelouch? It is still your Birthday-week.  
Suzaku: So that was why this was so sudden…  
Lelouch: Crap, I forgot all about that. I'm going to hide in my room. Give me the key.  
Jordan: Here. (Hands him a keycard) You and Suzaku are sharing a room. Me, Ash, and C.C. will have a conjoined room next to yours!  
Ashleigh: Everyone put on your swimsuits! We're heading to the beach today!_

_(At the beach!)  
C.C.: (Has on a white bathing suit.)  
Jordan: (Has on a black and white striped bathing suit.)  
Ashleigh: (A yellow, blue, and green bathing suit that makes her look like a can of Sprite.)  
Lelouch:(Red swimming trunks.)  
Suzaku:(Green swimming trunks.)  
Lelouch: (Notices they have row boats.) (Thinking) Hmm, if I rent one of those then I can escape the madness that's going on here… (So he goes and rents one and rows out into the ocean.)  
Jordan: (Already bored) Hey Ash!  
Ashleigh: What?  
Jordan: Do you think we can get Suzaku to do godly things while we are here?  
Ashleigh: Hmm… let's try. Hey Suzaku!  
Suzaku: (Comes running over from a crowd of girls.) Yes? Wanna play volleyball?  
Jordan: Not right now… We want to try something.  
Suzaku: (Looks confused)  
Ashleigh: Look Suzaku! Lelouch is in trouble! (Lying!) Run out there and get him! (Now grabbing his shoulders shaking him.)  
Suzaku: Run?  
Jordan: (Grabs his shoulders too and turns him around to face her.) You're god! You can do that!  
Suzaku: Well... (Tries to place his left foot on water- Successful. Tries to place his right foot on water- Falls in. Keeps trying and trying while yelling.) HANG ON LELOUCH I'LL BE THERE SOON!  
Lelouch: (All he can hear is light screaming.) What is that idiot up to now? Oh well, just keep going… At this rate I'll be in California in no time…  
(Jordan and Ashleigh stand back to watch Suzaku try to walk on water.)  
Jordan: Maybe we should tell him it was Jesus who walked on water and not God…  
Ashleigh: Eh… I still want to try one more thing._

Jordan: Go ahead.  
Ashleigh: Hey, Pretty Green Eyes! Since you can't walk on the water… why don't you try to part it?  
Suzaku: (Stops his attempts) Part it?  
Jordan: You know, like the Red Sea.  
Suzaku: (Pauses) … Good idea! (Runs back inland a bit and grabs a plastic sandcastle bucket. He scoops up some water around his feet and tosses it to the side like he's bailing out a lifeboat.) (Struggling) It's… not… work… ugh…  
Ashleigh: What??  
Suzaku: (Throws the bucket into the air) IT'S NOT WORKING!! IT JUST COMES BACK!!  
Jordan: Well FINE. If you want to be all HUMAN about it, I guess you could swim out there.  
Suzaku: (Dives into the ocean like a lifeguard)  
(The other three watch as Suzaku makes his way to the fleeting boat in the distance and grabs onto the side. The boat rocks for a moment before capsizing- Suzaku makes his way back to shore whilst toting a foiled Lulu.)  
Jordan: (Shakes her head) I didn't think he'd actually do it.  
Ashleigh: Maybe he was just humoring us… (Looks at C.C- who's been silent the entire time.)  
C.C.: (Holding up a camera- recording everything.)  
Ashleigh: C.C… What are you doing?  
C.C.: (Without moving her gaze from the lens) Are you kidding? Baywatch 2. Spielberg's got nothing on this.

_Lelouch: Suzaku! What the hell!? You got my book wet!  
Suzaku: But… Ash and Jordan...  
Lelouch: And you listened to them!?  
Suzaku: I knew something was up.  
(Flocks of people come to see all of the commotion.)  
Jordan: Maybe we should leave, we're causing a ruckus.  
Ashleigh: Yeah, this might be a fire hazard.  
C.C.: You guys need to get ready for tonight anyway, right?  
Suzaku: What's tonight?  
Ashleigh: Oh, uh- …Well, we're all going to do our own thing so, uh…  
Jordan: You're going to see magic show!  
Lelouch: Isn't that kind of odd? God going to see a magic show?  
C.C.: Hmm. Never thought of it that way._

(On the way back to hotel...)  
Lelouch: So, what AM I doing tonight?  
Ashleigh: The same thing we do every night, Pinky... Try to take over the world!  
Lelouch: ...  
Jordan: Don't listen to her. We're going to a meeting!_Lelouch: What meeting...?  
Ashleigh: Stupid, what do you think I packed that cape for!_

Lelouch: (Another facepalm) Great…  
Jordan: (Extends her arm into the air) To the Reception Hall!

(Later that night…)  
Random Terrorist #2: Hey, Zero! Why were we all suddenly called out here?  
Random Terrorist #1: Yeah, it seems really impromptu.  
Kallen: (Sarcastically) Maybe we all just need a vacation…  
Ashleigh: (Scribbling something in her notebook) Don't ask questions, just use it.  
Random Terrorists #1 and 2: Huh?  
Kallen: (Grabs Jordan and Ashleigh's shoulders) Could I talk to you two for a second?  
Jordan: Uh-huh, sure!  
(Secluded…)  
Kallen: (Hits the wall) Why the hell did you not invite me!?  
Ashleigh: This reason!!  
Jordan: We… didn't have enough room in the Punch Buggy…  
Kallen: (Eye twitch)

_Jordan: Could you do that again?  
Kallen: …What again?  
Ashleigh: They eye twitch thing. It made you look exactly like Lelouch.  
Kallen: I swear, if you two...  
Jordan: Yeah, yeah… Look, just spend the night here.  
Ashleigh: And don't answer any of Suzaku's questions.  
Kallen: And how do I get back?  
Jordan: Do you think C.C. can fly?  
Ashleigh: I don't think she's that kind witch.  
Jordan: We'll strap someone to the hood.  
Kallen: And if we get pulled by the cops?  
Jordan: What makes you think we'll get pulled?  
Ashleigh: Yeah… Jordan's got a lead foot._

_(SUNDAY MORNING!)  
(At the beach!)_

Suzaku: This is sad that it's our last day here… and Kallen just shows up out of nowhere.  
Ashleigh: Yeah, I definitely don't want to go back to school Monday…  
Kallen: Isn't it a little too cold out here this morning?  
C.C.: I didn't even get my breakfast pizza…  
Lelouch: I'm with them, I'm going to sleep.  
(Jordan and Ashleigh get evil grins and wait for Lelouch to fall asleep.)

(About ten minutes later…)

Jordan and Ashleigh: (Tiptoe through the sand with buckets and shovels.)  
Kallen and Suzaku: (Body surfing in the ocean)  
C.C.: (Hoping to find a pizza stall, makes a beeline for the pier… about a mile down the beach.)  
Lelouch: (Asleep with a book over his face)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Begin to dig with mischievous smiles.)  
(Approx. five minutes later…)  
(A pile of sand sits on top of the still slumbering one…)  
(Half an hour later…!!)  
(Jordan and Ashleigh have precisely sculpted the sand to resemble the Zero Costume. Cape and all!)  
C.C.: (Returning with her pizza) You two have been busy…  
Jordan: Shh! We're not done yet…  
C.C.: (Watches the two duck under a large umbrella they stuck into the sand a few meters away)  
Jordan: (Grabs her bag of Skittles)  
Ashleigh: (Grabs her manga)  
C.C.: (Starts to see what's going to happen so she snaps a picture of the sand sculpture with her camera before getting front-row seats.)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Get a handful of potato chips from their beach-bag… and chuck them towards their masterpiece.)  
(BIRDS SWARM!!)

_Lelouch: (Eyes burst open from the sound of flapping wings) Where the hell did they all come from!? (Tries to look up at his hair because he can feel birds pecking at it. One carries his book into the air.) Hey! (Reaches his hand out to try and catch it but can move from the sand) WHY THE HELL-!!  
C.C.: (Looks at Ashleigh and Jordan) I love you guys.  
Lelouch: (Finally burst a leg through the sand so he looks like a turtle on his back.) JORDAN!! ASHLEIGH!!  
Jordan: (Without looking up from the Skittles) They're only Britannian birds, Lulu. Calm down.  
Lelouch: Britannian!?  
Ashleigh: (Without looking up from the manga) Yeah, you were dressed like Zero so they came to attack you.  
Lelouch: (Now completely out of the sand and heading for them.) What in Suzaku's name are you talking about!?  
C.C.: (Shows him the pictures)  
Lelouch: We're going home! Now! (Grabs Jordan and Ashleigh by the back of their collars and drags them through the sand.)  
Jordan: (Undisturbed- eating her Skittles.)  
Ashleigh: (Undisturbed- reading her manga.)_

C.C.: (Follows them with her pizza.)  
Suzaku and Kallen: (Saw the entire thing from out in the surf- distracted, and almost get taken under by a riptide from laughing too hard.)

(Back at the hotel…)

Lelouch: (Still trying to get the sand out of his hair) What could have possibly possessed you two to make you do something like that!?  
Jordan: (Packing her things) Boredom?  
C.C.: (Sitting cross-legged at the edge of the bed) Stroke of genius?  
Lelouch: No one was asking you.  
Ashleigh: (Packing with one hand, still reading with the other) Britannia made us do it.  
Jordan: (Nods) Uh-huh, uh-huh.  
Suzaku: (Comes in through the conjoining door and holds up a box of band-aids and some antiseptic.) You were looking for these? (He tries his hardest to wipe the smirk off of his face.)  
(Kallen is heard- still laughing hysterically- in the room Suzaku just came from.)  
Lelouch: (Snatches the box from his hands and storms into the other room.) Tch!  
Suzaku: (Still trying not to laugh… but failing.)  
Kallen: (Shoved into the room because she wouldn't stop laughing.)  
(A bang is heard from the conjoining room, followed by a muffled yell.)  
Jordan: Maybe we should've told him that the antiseptic burned…  
Ashleigh: (Waves her hand at her) Nah…

Owari!!

XxX

**Author's Notes-** This chapter is strangely reminiscent of chapter 1… or any of the early chapters, really. Plus, I got to bring in my two favourite characters, Random Terrorist # 1 and 2, again! Incase you're wondering exactly what manga I was reading in the last scenes: it was Gakuen Alice. Yep.

Adame-Senpai is really Jordan and I's senpai named Adam. We just call him Adame to mess with him, and the entire 'detestable pizza' dialogue is an actual quote and idea from him. (If you've read the quotes on my profile, then you'd know that already.)

_**Author's Notes-**__ I wonder if Lulu really DOES have one of Nunnally's frilly dresses with him… Hmm…_

**There is a slight possibility,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter:** Deleted Scenes! (Summary: A collection of scenes that were cut, or thought of, after the fact. Multiple ones from every chapter so far.)


	14. Deleted Scenes

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or TiVo… or The Office… or CiCi's Pizza… or Rodger Rabbit… or the Rick Roll… or How I Met Your Mother… or Deathklok… or Death Note… or 'They're All Gonna Laugh at You!'…**

**Author's Notes-** It hasn't been too long, I hope. The play and other things are finished so Jordan and I don't have so much to do anymore. More time to write things! Anyway, we divided the scenes by which chapter they would fit into. At the end there will be the Chapter One/Miscellaneous scenes.

Us posting these Deleted Scenes is not a prerequisite to the end of the story, by the way.

_**Author's Notes-**__I'm hyper…Yeah, that explains it… half of this I did while half-way asleep. Yes, yes this is not, I repeat, not the end of the story… We have something else in mind for that…long, long time from now…(Evil laugh)_

xXx

**Chapter Two**

… Jordan: Hold onto this for me, kay?  
Suzaku: (Watches Jordan hide a handful of Skittles and sets the bag by his books before continuing to take notes.)  
Jordan: (Positions one arm on the desk like she's about to put her head down, and the other like a catapult. She aims and fires the entire handful of Skittles towards Lelouch while simultaneously putting her head on the desk as if nothing happened.)  
(The Skittles create a downpour and make a noise that sounds remarkably like heavy rain.)  
Jordan: (Snickers evilly into the table)  
Ashleigh: (Almost suffocating herself from stifling her laughter.)  
Suzaku: (Oblivious… thinking it's actually raining.)  
Lelouch: (Reels back in his chair, startled out of his ever-loving mind.)  
The Teacher: (Doesn't care because he was sick and tired of that smart-ass sleeping during his class anyway.) …

-

… (Bonk!)  
Lelouch: (Suddenly wakes up from the blow to the head) What the-…? (Sees the several Skittles surrounding his desk and  
turns around)  
Jordan: (Acting nonchalant, looking straight ahead, with a finger pointed at Suzaku)  
Suzaku: (Has no idea what's going on and keeps taking notes)  
Lelouch: (Sees the bag of Skittles beside Suzaku's books. Glares at him)  
Jordan: (Pokes Suzaku to get his attention)  
Suzaku: (Looks up) (Notices Lelouch's look of pure evil) (After a while, he starts to understand what happened…)  
Jordan: (Still pointing at him)  
Lelouch: (Still glaring, surrounded by Skittles)  
Suzaku: (Thinks he's already going to get blamed no matter how much he says otherwise.) (Stands up and points at Lelouch) Taste the rainbow, bitch!! …

-

…_Jordan: Pretty Green Eyes... Pretty Green Eyes!  
Ash: (Walks in) Hey Suzaku… You know she's talking to you.  
Suzaku: (Looks up) Huh, what?_  
_Ash: YOU'RE Pretty Green Eyes!  
Suzaku: Oh, um… What is it?  
Jordan: Will you had me the remote!?  
Suzaku: Yeah, sure- wait, what?! All this for an hour... JUST FOR THE REMOTE!!  
Jordan: Yeah, got a problem with it?  
_Suzaku: (Hands her the remote) But… why Pretty… Green Eyes?  
Jordan: Because you HAVE Pretty Green Eyes, dummy.  
Suzaku: But why just me? Why don't you give a weird nickname to Lelouch or somebody?!  
Ashleigh: Because 'Pretty Purple Eyes' just doesn't roll off of the tongue.  
Jordan: Yep! Pretty Green Eyes does though!  
Suzaku: (Facepalm) …

**Chapter Three**

_…(Suzaku walks through the door)  
Suzaku: You guys, I'm here!  
Lelouch: Who's that?  
Jordan: Umm... the maid!  
Lelouch: Why is the maid a guy?  
Ashleigh: You're kinky like that…_

-

…Suzaku: Yes… your name isn't Lelouch.  
Jordan, Ash, and Milly: (Fall back from almost strangling Suzaku to trying not to laugh)  
_Lelouch: What? Yes it is!  
Jordan, Ash, and Milly: Huh?  
Suzaku: No, no your name is-  
Lelouch: Lelouch.  
Suzaku: How do you-?  
Lelouch: Look, I know my name is Lelouch.  
Jordan, Ash, Milly: But how!?  
Lelouch: That girl over there is holding up a sign that says, "Lelouch, I need pizza money," and pointing to me. (He points at C.C. standing outside the glass door with a big sign.)…  
_

**Chapter Four**

…_Ash: Why are there terrorists on the roof?  
_Jordan_:_ (Gasps) Oh no! The Black Knights have taken over Santa's Workshop!!  
Lelouch: Don't be ridiculou-  
Jordan: Now they're forcing all of the poor little elves to use their equipment to make weapons! (Her voice shakes) No… no…!  
Ashleigh: (Puts an arm around Jordan's shoulder and starts to lead her down the stairs. She looks over her shoulder and glares.) You're sick. Just SICK…

-

The Tale of Random Terrorist # 3

Ashleigh: (Standing in front of a group of random Black Knight Soldiers- outside of the meeting grounds.) Okay… so… (Scribbles in the notebook) I need Random Terrorist # 1… (She scans the group and points to a person.) You'll do.  
Officially Dubbed Random Terrorist # 1: Yes! (Heads into the building)  
Ashleigh: (Looking into the notebook) Alright, now: Random Terrorist # 2? (Goes through the group of hopefuls again.) You.  
Officially Dubbed Random Terrorist # 2: Awesome! (Grabs his cellphone and dials while walking away.) Hey Mom, guess what!  
Ashleigh: Oookaaayyy… Anyway… Let's see… Random Terrorist # 3… (Looks at the group and points to someone.) I suppose you'll be good for that part.  
Officially Dubbed Random Terrorist # 3: Whoo!  
(The rest of the group disperses)  
Jordan: (Suddenly walks in) Actually, two should be good enough, right?  
Ashleigh: (Looks into her notes) Hmm… Sure. We've got two. Three would be too complicated… (Points to Random Terrorist # 3) You've been cut!  
Random Terrorist # 3: Wha- (He barely strangles out the 't' before spontaneously combusting.)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Walk into the building to do the scene.)

-

… Jordan: Okay! Time for Christmas Carols!  
Suzaku: (Looks up from a bag of candy canes) Christmas Carols?  
Ashleigh: Yes!  
Jordan: The Twelve Days of Japanese Christmas!  
Suzaku: … Japanese Christmas??  
Lelouch: Oh no…  
Ashleigh: Yes, Japanese Christmas.  
Jordan: Okay, so, sing along! You know the words! On the first day of-  
Ashleigh: Hold on Jordan… I sort of… altered the lyrics a bit… To fit our current situation.  
Jordan: Huh? Really… Oh, well! On the first day of Japanese Christmas Suzaku gave to me-  
Suzaku: Wait, what!? I gave??  
Ashleigh: Yes now stop interrupting the song!  
Jordan: … Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: A Knightmare Frame- so pretty!_  
Jordan: Well… it better have Green Eyes!_  
Suzaku: You mean like the Lancelot, right-  
Ashleigh: Next!  
Jordan: On the second day of Japanese Christmas Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: Two Zero capes!_  
Jordan: It's twice the power!_  
Both: And a Knightmare Frame- so pretty!  
Lelouch: I definitely saw that one coming.  
Suzaku: (Nods)  
Jordan: Third day… Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: Three Spin-Kicks!_  
Jordan: Wow, God just keeps getting more and more powerful…_  
Jordan: Fourth day… Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: Four evil laughs!_  
Jordan: Wait, wait… Does that mean he's lost his mind four times?_  
Lelouch: Just who are you referring to!?  
Jordan: Fifth day… Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: Five… Pizza Pies!!!_  
Jordan: Great! I'm Hungry!_  
C.C.: (Falls over)  
Jordan: Sixth day… Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: Six Hand positions!_  
Jordan: Yeah, he's just flexible like that_.  
Ashleigh: (Nods) (Spirit fingers) Nimble fingers!  
The other two: (Watch in slight disbelief)  
Jordan: Seventh day… Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: Seven Black Knight Soldiers!_  
Jordan: Great… the army's growing_… Anyway! On the Eighth day… Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: Eight Knightmares Flying!_  
Jordan: Wow, it's for battling in the air!_ On the Ninth day… Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: Nine Geass Mind-Fucks._  
Jordan: C.C. stop that!_  
Ashleigh: Actually, I think you have that backwards…  
Lelouch: (Glares)  
Jordan: Tenth day… Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: TEN-Thousand Zeros!_  
Jordan: (Her eyes widen) Holy shit! Britannia's FUCKED!!_  
Suzaku: (Blank stare) …Holy…  
Lelouch: (Thinking) That's not such a horrible idea…  
Jordan: Eleventh day… Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: Eleven Lulu death glares!_  
Jordan: Ooh… scaaaryyy…_  
Lelouch: (Glares again)  
Suzaku: Twelve!  
Jordan: On the Twelfth day of Japanese Christmas, Suzaku gave to me:  
Ashleigh: Twelve bowls of Pudding!_  
Jordan: Now I remember why I brought that kiddie pool for Lloyd!_  
Ashleigh and Jordan (And eventually Suzaku…): (Recite the rest)  
Lelouch: Okay! That's it, no more Christmas songs!!…

**Chapter Five**

…Suzaku: (Walks into the kitchen, his heart still racing)  
Lelouch: (Looks up from his cereal) You look like crap.  
Suzaku: (Fake laughs) … did you… have a very… frightening experience this morning?  
Lelouch: …?  
Suzaku: I mean did you wake up with a girl RIGHT in your face yelling 'Good Morning!'?  
Lelouch: (Goes back to his cereal) Are you kidding? _I had one pointing a megaphone at my head and another in a Knightmare Frame with sirens…_

-

The Ten Commandments of Suzakuism

1. Thou shalt not achieve goals by use of detestable means. (Suzaku: (In the background) Exactly!)  
2. Thou shalt _all worship the Lancelot_. (Suzaku: (In the background again) Uhm… Okay?)  
3. Thou shalt _all wear skin-tight suits whilst in battle_. (Suzaku: I wouldn't if I had a choice, alright! Honest!)  
4. Thou shalt use all means to gain The Keys. (Suzaku: It's not like I WANTED to punch him…)  
5. Thou shalt respect thy enemy. (Suzaku: WHAT!?!)  
6. Thou shalt know Lloyd's favourite food on instant. (Suzaku: Oh, I know what it is! … Crap!)  
7. Thou shalt _know how to croak like a frog_. (Suzaku: In Japanese!)  
8. Thou shalt _perform spin-kicks at every opportunity._ (Suzaku: Don't ask questions, just use it!)  
9. Thou shalt have an animal guardian. (Suzaku: _I love that cat!!_)  
10. Thou shalt _wear a stupid beret_. (Suzaku: I thought I looked spiffy in that beret… (Pout))

Jordan and Ashleigh: (Finish reading their creation out loud) And that's all!  
Lelouch: (Grabs the scroll- yes a scroll- from their hands. He looks it over for a few moments, silently.) … I can't live by these.

**Chapter Six**

… (Kallen and Ashleigh are on top of a blockade, their guns pointed at Suzaku. They high-five.)  
Suzaku: (Fires up) Not fair! How'd you get up there!?  
Ash: We flew!  
Kallen: (Jumps down and charges at Suzaku)  
(The two start dodging and shooting at each other like it's a real war)  
Kallen: (Leaps towards Suzaku, whips him around and holds her Pink-Purse-Knife to his throat.)  
Suzaku: Kallen! Kallen! Calm down! This isn't a real battle!  
Kallen: (Realizes what she's doing) Oh… Sorry… I get so confused….

-

…Lelouch: (Eye twitch) Can we go home now?  
Bunny: (In a funny voice) What's your hurry? There are so many things to do here!  
Lelouch: Not quite.  
Bunny: Someone needs a hug!  
Lelouch: I'm not a very huggy person.  
Bunny: (In a normal voice) You and your friend are here with four girls. Common, man. Who wouldn't be-  
Lelouch: (Crazy Eye) I command you to not do what I say!  
Bunny: (Freezes)  
C.C.: (Almost chokes on her pizza)  
Bunny: (Mumbling something incoherent)  
Lelouch: (Quirks an eyebrow) Well?  
(The bunny's head suddenly explodes)  
Jordan, Ashleigh, Kallen, and Suzaku: (Stare at the decapitated bunny falling to the ground.)  
Lelouch: Huh… I've always wondered what would happen if I did that…

**Chapter Seven**

_…Ashleigh: Jordan makes as much sense as me when she's half asleep. She actually becomes very confused.  
Jordan: (Jumps on Lelouch's back) ONWARD LANCELOT!  
Lelouch: (Tries to shake her off) I'm not a Knightmare! Get off!  
Jordan: Mmmh… the Lancelot got skinnier… (She grabs Lelouch's sides to where it tickles him… He jumps in the air and Jordan falls off his back.)  
Jordan: Great, it's broken! Now I'll have to take the damn Gurren… (She jumps on Suzaku's back)  
Suzaku: Huh?  
Ashleigh: Just take her back to bed. She won't remember this in the morning.  
(Suzaku and Jordan head back upstairs)…_

**Chapter Eight**

_…Lelouch: This is so stupid! Why I'm I even obeying your rules!?  
Ashleigh: I've always wondered that myself.  
Jordan: Maybe you're the one who's actually mentally insane.  
C.C.: Precisely.  
Lelouch: No one asked you! We'll how about this why don't I just make my own… fort.  
Ashleigh: Yeah, right!  
Jordan: You couldn't even if you tried.  
C.C.: (Shakes head yes)  
Lelouch: Watch me! Come on Suzaku!  
Suzaku: (Looks up from playing with Arthur with Pocky in his mouth.) Huh?  
Ashleigh: You do that and your causing a war!  
Suzaku: Hey now guys there's no reason to start fighting! (Gets hit by a pillow)  
Jordan: My bad Pretty Green Eyes!  
Suzaku: How did that hurt? What was in that pillow?  
Ashleigh: Just a few bottles….  
Jordan: Full of skittles…  
Suzaku: Fine, then if you're going play like that then I'm on Lelouch's side.  
Lelouch: Thank you Suz- (Gets hit by a pillow with doggie toys in it) What was that!?  
(SQUEEEAAAK!!)  
C.C.: Dog toys.  
Lelouch: Why would you do that!? (Gets Arthur thrown on him) Ow!  
Suzaku: (Gives them a what the? Look)  
Jordan: What? We ran out of pillows…_

-

…Random Terrorist #2: (Checks her pulse) But she's… dead…  
Jordan: Holy crap! What are we gonna do now?!  
Random Terrorist # 1: Dump her in the harbor.  
Random Terrorist # 2: (Looks around for the go-ahead… No one objects so he drags Shirley's lifeless body out of the room.)…

**Chapter Nine**

… Jordan: Who framed Rodger Rabbit?  
Ashleigh: Britannia!…

-

… (The sound of glass shattering comes from the kitchen)  
Suzaku: Uh… Uhm, Britannia did it!…

**Chapter Ten**

Suzaku: (In the Lancelot) Suzaku… Speed!  
Lloyd: (Over the speaker) Sorry, Kururugi. We've forgotten to tell you that you can't drink and drive the Lancelot.  
Suzaku: WHAT!!?? Suzaku… Quit!

-

Suzaku: (Still in the Lancelot) Suzaku… Rick Roll! (Presses a button)  
('Never Gonna Give You Up' begins blaring from a set of speakers on the Lancelot. All of the terrorists drop their weapons to put their hands over their ears.)  
Terrorists: Nooo!!!

**Chapter Eleven**

…_(Everyone comes over to see what Lelouch's surprise would be for that day..)  
(Ringing of a phone is heard)  
__Lelouch: (Goes to pick it up) Hel…(Hits himself in the head with the phone) Ow! What the- did this thing get lighter?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Are seen running down the hall with a sack jingling)  
Lelouch: C.C., stop them and see what is in that bag!  
C.C.: (Steps in front of them)_  
_Jordan:_ _It's only a bag of nickels.  
Milly: Why do you have a bag of nickels?  
Jordan: Well you see it's all linked to the phon-  
Ashleigh: (Covering Jordan's mouth) We were just gonna put these in our piggy banks.  
Kallen: That doesn't sound innocent at all… coming from you two, anyway.  
Ashleigh: Fine, if you must know, we put a nickel inside his phone every day.  
Jordan: And today we took them all out!  
Ashleigh: And… well, you saw the result._  
C.C.: …Since it's so subtle, no one would've noticed.  
Lelouch: You two find the simplest things and make them torturous.  
Jordan: It's our specialty! …

**Chapter Twelve**

Cecile: (Talking to Lloyd) What? You installed T.V.?  
Llyod: Of course! We had a little money left over, you know!  
Cecile: Did you tell Suzaku?  
Lloyd: No, why?  
(Meanwhile...)  
Suzaku: (Not paying attention- hit by the Gurren) Can't this wait until 'How I Met Your Mother' is over!?  
Zero: That's why you need TiVo!  
Random Terrorist #1: You guys have T.V. in there!?

-

…Ashleigh: (Throws something at Suzaku) Dammit, Suzaku! What the hell are you doing?? And what's with that outfit!?_  
Suzaku: (Stands up revealing he is wearing Zero's cape)  
Jordan: Ummmm…  
Suzaku: What? It was a guilty curiosity!__  
Ashleigh: Yeah more like a guilty pleasure…  
Lelouch: Hey! You're one to talk!  
Suzaku: (Rubbing the tips of the collar) I do feel more powerful in this…__  
Lelouch: When did he even find time to steal that?  
Ashleigh: __More importantly, WHERE did he find it after I hid it?  
Jordan: Ummm…_

-

… (At the Order of the Black Knights, Jordan and Ashleigh somehow- miraculously- beat him there.)  
All of the Soldiers: (Stop in their tracks and stare at him in shock.)  
Lelouch: … What?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Have their backs to him because they can't face him.)  
Annoying Terrorist (… You know the one…): (Bursts out laughing)  
Lelouch: Just what is so funny exactly?  
Annoying Terrorist: (Points) Your face!  
Lelouch: What? (He turns to a reflective surface and sees that Jordan and Ashleigh have managed to draw a large smiley-face on the mask. He grabs the two of them and forcefully yanks them out of the room.) I need to speak with the two of you!  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Can no longer suppress the urge and release their laughter.)…

**Chapter Thirteen**

…Jordan: Why are you here??  
Adame-Senpai: Oh, I'm just leaving you know. I only came for the Deathklok concert.  
Ashleigh: We should've guessed.  
Adame-Senpai: Yeah, they collapsed an entire parking lot on top of some people. It was awesome…

-

… _J__ordan: Don't listen to her. We're going to a meeting!  
Lelouch: What meeting...?  
Ashleigh: Stupid, what do you think I packed that cape for!_  
(Later…)  
(The three are about to go into the meeting…)  
Jordan: (Grabs the end of the cape) NO!  
Lelouch: What? What is it now!?  
Jordan: They're all gonna laugh at you!  
Lelouch: … what?  
Ashleigh: They're all gonna laugh at you!  
Lelouch: I'm leaving!  
Jordan and Ashleigh: NO!  
Lelouch: Why not!?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: They're all gonna laugh at you!  
Lelouch: Is that the only thing you two can say!?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: NO!  
Lelouch: (Sigh) This is pointless. (Leaves and slams the door)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Look at each other) They're all gonna laugh at him!…

**Miscellaneous**

C.C.: Apples! Bring me apples!  
Ashleigh: (Runs in) No, no, no, no, no! Wrong show! This isn't Death Note, people!!

-

Jordan: Where do you want to go for Dinner tonight?  
C.C.: Pizza.  
Ashleigh: Yes, but WHERE do you want to get Pizza?  
C.C.: Pizza Hut.  
Lelouch: No, not Pizza Hut again… They're starting to recognize this number…. It's getting creepy.  
C.C.: Fine I have the perfect idea… Follow me.  
(They all go to and enter a restaurant…)  
Random Employee: Hey, Welcome to- Oh… Hey, Hey! The founder is here! Here in our restaurant! (He starts clapping)  
(The people eating start clapping as well.)  
Jordan: C.C… where did you take us?  
C.C.: Isn't it obvious?  
Random Employee: Welcome to CiCi's Pizza!  
Ashleigh: Why am I not surprised?

-

Lelouch: (Searching everywhere for the cape. When he can't find it, he runs downstairs…) Alright, what did you do with it?  
Jordan: With what?  
Lelouch: The cape!  
Ashleigh: Oh, that? You'll have to wait until Four to get it.  
Lelouch: … Why!?  
Jordan: (Hands him a ticket) We sent it to get dry-cleaned!

xXx

**Author's Notes-** Okay, this chapter was really pointless I guess… Also, I know it took the two of us a long, long time to update but you have to be patient with us at times… We had so many things to do on back-to-back weekends and life is extremely hectic as of late… So until we can find some nice, relaxing time: Sumimasen!

On a lighter note: On October 18, 2008… my life has been completed. For on that day… I received a treasure. I now have: A cape! It's not exactly like my dream… but it's just enough to make me have a fangirl-like fit… and Jordan back away slowly whenever I wear it…

_**Author's Notes-**_ Due to Jordan's apathy, it seems I'm writing her Author's Notes at 1:27 in the morning. She's not the only tired one, sheesh… "I'm going to sleep. Night. That is them." -Jordan

**Yeah, I'm not too sure myself… Oyasumi nasai!**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter: **Untitled (Summary: This chapter will strongly resemble the earlier chapters of the fic... AKA, very, very random.)


	15. That's What She Said

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass…or Scrubs… or Transformers… or the Rubik's Cube… or Sharpies… or Count Chocula… or Monty Python… or Death Note… or Vampire Knight… or Rainbow Monkeys… or Trogdor… or HnNKn…**

**Author's Notes-** Alright… this chapter is very, no, extremely random. We came up with… practically all of these ideas whilst talking to Adame-Senpai. He's been a big part of our inspiration as of late. (Grin)

And yeah… I know that my beginning to this chapter has a bit of a… lengthy buildup… but it'll be worth it, I promise.

_**Author's Notes**__- Yay all of our school projects are done so now we have more time to write things!!_

xXx

…Somewhere near the Tokyo Settlement…

(Suzaku: in the Lancelot- testing new some new features Lloyd has added to it.)

Lloyd: (Over a loud speaker- live feed appears on a screen to Suzaku's left.) How's everything so far, Suzaku?  
Suzaku: Everything's functioning perfectly.  
Cecile: (With Lloyd- standing out of frame) Our transmission signal is strong- it will be very difficult for anyone to cut off our communications with you.  
Lloyd: Yes, we can't have anything happening to the Lancelot while we're left in the dark about it, now can we?  
Cecile: (Sounding agitated) I was thinking of Suzaku being the primary concern, Lloyd.  
Lloyd: (Hums once, typing something.) Of course, we can't replace the Lancelot but if Kururugi happened to-  
Cecile: Lloyd!!  
Lloyd: (Smiles) What?  
Suzaku: (Sighs) Don't worry Ms. Cecile. I know Lloyd just has trouble communicating.  
Cecile: At least YOU understand…  
Lloyd: Try out the new Slash Harkens yet, Suzaku?  
Suzaku: Not yet, I was waiting until I got to a clear area.  
Lloyd: Oh, don't worry about things like that. What're a few trees compared to results?  
Cecile: (Stands up abruptly- like she's about to explode and spew molten crazy all over Lloyd… but takes a deep breath and walks away slowly.)  
Suzaku: (Cringes as the door slams and shakes his head.)  
Lloyd: (Sighs) I swear that girl really needs to find an outlet for all of that stress. It's getting in the way of our work.  
Suzaku: (Shakes his head again.)

Meanwhile…

Cecile: (Storms into a lab and slams the door behind her) Agh, that Lloyd! (Hits the wall- as she does one of the incubator-looking things in the room opens up… revealing a shiny Core Luminous.) Huh? What's this doing here?  
(She hesitantly picks it up and examines it. After a while, she notices the pack of multi-coloured Sharpies on the desk and gains a genius idea…)

Back with Lloyd and Suzaku…

Suzaku: All systems are operating at full efficiency.  
Lloyd: Good work, Suzaku. You can return to the base now.  
Suzaku: Right. (As he heads in that direction, the Lancelot begins to shake and make odd noises.) What the-?  
Lloyd: What's wrong with the Lancelot, Suzaku!?  
Suzaku: (Looks around frantically) I- I'm not sure! (Presses random buttons and pulls levers- nothing changes.)  
(Eventually, the 'limbs' of the Lancelot begin to shift and change position like it's a Transformer. One quick metamorphosis later….)  
Suzaku: (Blinks- sitting on top of what appears to be a white, blue, and gold lamp, with this knees pulled up under his ears.) What just happened?  
Lloyd: Suzaku! Suzaku! What happened!?  
Suzaku: (Stands up and examines the lamp. The skinny body of said lamp clearly reads THE LAMPELOT.) I… really… don't… know…|  
Cecile: (Walks back into the room with a Rubik's Cube- crudely made from the Sharpies and the Core Luminous- in her hand.) What's wrong?  
Lloyd: Something's wrong with the Lancelot!  
Suzaku: Lampelot.  
Lloyd: I mean Lampelot. Wait, what?  
Suzaku: The Lancelot turned into a lamp.  
Lloyd: It… what? (Looks devastated)  
Cecile: (Glances at the Rubik's Cube) Uh… I'll be right back! (Runs out)  
Lloyd: Fix it, Kururugi! Fix it!  
Suzaku: (Thinks) Hmn… (Places the Lampelot on top of this head and pulls the string- a green light comes on.) I have an idea!  
Cecile: (In the other room… messing with the Rubik's Cube futilely.) Agh, go back! What's the code for this thing again!? (She gets frustrated and throws the cube on the ground- shattering it.)  
(The Lampelot suddenly begins to transform back into the Lancelot while it's still on Suzaku's head.)  
Suzaku: (Flinches- a loud boom is heard.)

_Lloyd: __Suzaku__! … Suzaku!? What happened!?  
Rivalz: Oh, man, sorry! I knocked you over with my scooter, Suzaku!  
Suzaku: It's okay Rivalz. Don't worry. You actually saved my life.  
Lloyd: Rivalz? Who is Rivalz!? What about the Lancelot!?  
Suzaku: It's fine Lloyd; it went back to normal somehow...  
Lloyd: Thank heavens... Bring it back in and let us see what went wrong.  
(Cecile walks back in)  
Cecile: So um... What happened while I was gone?  
Lloyd: You wouldn't believe it! (Throws his hands up in the air) There was all this racket and then 'BAM!' The Lancelot turned into a lamp!  
Cecile: Oh, umm, wow that's amazing! I wonder what made it do that? (Hiding what's left of the cube behind her back.)  
Lloyd: I'm not quite sure either..._

_Meanwhile... At the Clubhouse..._

_(C.C., Lelouch, Jordan, and Ashleigh all sit in a room- completely and awkwardly silent.)  
(Everyone looks at one another)  
Jordan: ... I'm bored...  
Ashleigh: What else is new?  
C.C.: I'm bored as well...  
__Jordan: You know what I've always wondered?  
Ashleigh and C.C: What?  
Jordan: (Looks at Lelouch) Where did you come up with names like 'Zero' and 'Black Knights?'  
Ashleigh: Too much Monty Python?  
Lelouch: What kind of a question is that?  
Jordan: I'm just asking... (Gets and Idea and whispers to Ashleigh)__  
Ashleigh: I can imagine the conversation...  
Jordan: It would be like...  
(The two quickly run upstairs. Ashleigh returns with the cape and Jordan returns with a lime green blanket draped over her head. They start to act out the scene.)  
Lelouch (The fake one): Ugh, I hate coming up with names. It's too troublesome.  
C.C. (The fake one): What are you naming?  
Lelouch: I'll need a name for my secret identity and my army of rebellious followers, of course. Hmm... What if I spell my name backwards?  
C.C.: Too obvious.  
Lelouch: You're right. (Thinks a while longer)  
C.C.: Why not take a number? It will make the Japanese trust you more since they were also given a number._

Lelouch: … That's just stupid.  
C.C.: Suit yourself…  
Lelouch: Besides, 'Twenty-Six' is hardly a formidable alias… It needs to be mysterious, something that will strike fear into the hearts of those who oppose me!  
C.C.: You're not a vampire; you know that, right?  
Lelouch: Of course I do! Although… (Holds the tip of the cape's collar)… this thing does give the 'Count Chocula' impression…  
C.C.: And our enemy looks like the guy on the oatmeal box. Sounds like this war is really Hot Cereal vs. Cold Cereal.  
Lelouch: You're not helping.  
C.C.: I never planned to.  
(Long silence…)  
Lelouch: How about Trogdor: the Burninator?  
C.C.: No Internet memes.  
Lelouch: Fine, be that way. Perhaps I could take the name from my favourite anime or manga… But I won't be Kira. The Death Note fanbase would go berserk with that connection.  
C.C.: Good catch.  
Lelouch: And 'L' would give the impression that my name begins with an L and since, coincidentally, it does, I have to scratch that.  
C.C.: Getting warmer.  
Lelouch: I guess I'll have to pick another source… my second favourite then… Kaname is that Ohgi guy's name so I can't use that… Aidou sounds pretty good. It resembles 'Idol' in English.  
C.C.: … No… just, no… Go with a more… badass character.  
Lelouch: Fine. That settles it. Zero. I don't want to hear any complaints from you.  
C.C.: … That's a number.  
Lelouch: I- (Pause) … No it isn't! Zero is nothing. Numbers represent quantities and 'nothing' is not a quantity. Once again you're mistaken.  
C.C.: (Facepalm) Just go on to the army…  
Lelouch: Right, the army… Now, the name should represent the faction well… Strength, power, and of course: covert.  
C.C.: Since the Britannians have knights to fight and defend them why don't you have knights to do the same for the Japanese people.  
Lelouch: … C.C., before you speak, think of how absurd the words you're about so say are, then reconsider speaking.  
C.C.: Fine. Whatever. Do it without me.  
Lelouch: Hmn… Brigade… I like the sound of a Brigade of some sort…  
C.C.: (Sarcastically) The Rainbow Monkey Brigade?  
Lelouch: (Defensively) … I wasn't going to say that.  
C.C.: Of course you weren't.  
Lelouch: No, no. Since the alias is from my second favourite manga, then it's only natural that the army's name comes from my second favourite movie: Monty Python and the Holy Grail!  
C.C.: (Another facepalm) Oh, good lord…  
Lelouch: It's perfect. The name is dangerous and describes sheer terror. The Killer Bunnies!  
C.C.: You can't be serious, can you?  
Lelouch: Hmn. I guess you're right this time, C.C. That might me a little extreme for the general public… I have it! A name that speaks of a warrior so formidable that even the loss of extremities won't hinder his loyalty and willingness to fight! The Black Knights!  
C.C.: … I told you from the beginning to pick something with Knights in it.  
Lelouch: … No you didn't.  
C.C.: Yes, I did.  
Lelouch: I think I'd remember you actually having a good idea for once.  
C.C.: (Stands up) That's it. I'm stealing your credit card to join the Pizza Hut Franchise.  
C.C. (The Real One): Why didn't I think of that?  
Lelouch: (The Real One): … (Speechless)  
Jordan: (Adjusts the blanket on her head and bows) That was fun!  
Ashleigh: (Laughing hysterically) Can you imagine!? (Laughs) The Killer Bunnies! (Laughs harder)  
Lelouch: That was the most ridiculous scenario I've ever heard of.  
C.C.: Isn't that eerily similar to how that conversation actually went?  
Lelouch: We never had that conversation! Don't feed their twisted realities!

_(Suzaku walks in)  
Suzaku: Hey guys, guess what Britannia's new method for getting rid of Zero is!  
Lelouch: This should be interesting.  
Ashleigh: Fine, I'll bite. How Suzaku?  
Suzaku: With Fireworks! Were gonna smoke 'em and scare them out of their hiding place.  
Jordan: (Jumping off couch) LULU GO BOOM!  
Ashleigh: (Covers Jordan's mouth.) Shhhh!!!  
Suzaku: Huh? What did she mean by tha-…  
C.C.: Don't worry about it._

_(Later that day…)_

_(Jordan and Ashleigh are snooping around in Lelouch's room.)  
Jordan: Hey Ash, why does he have two closets?__  
Ashleigh: Why are you asking ME that? (Opens one door to reveal a few clothes and some boxes…)  
(She opens the other door and it's pitch black. She flips on the lights and one light comes on, further down the tunnel, another, and another, and it keeps going… to reveal and endless supply of starch!)  
Ashleigh: So THAT'S how the collar stays up!  
Jordan: I wonder how far this tunnel goes…  
(Suzaku and Lelouch walk in)  
Lelouch: What are you doing in here?!  
__Suzaku: Man! How long is this thing? (Peering into closet)  
_Jordan: (Mumbles) …That's what she said…_  
Ashleigh: I'm not sure… but I'm gonna find out! (She runs off)  
(When they finally reach the end of the closet, they find another door.)  
Jordan: What are you hiding in here, Lulu?  
Lelouch: Who knows? C.C. built this one.  
(They open the door to reveal mounds of pizza! (Duh. What did you think it was gonna be, the Lancelot?)  
Suzaku: Whoa… Cool! (Grabs a pizza box)  
(All of a sudden, a loud alarm comes on with a spinning red light.)  
Lelouch: What the-?  
(C.C. drops out of thin air with a machine gun and points it at Suzaku.)  
C.C.: Drop the pizza.  
Suzaku: (Wide-eyed) Huh? (Pouts) Man…(Puts it back)  
Ashleigh: C.C… how far does this go?  
C.C.: The Chinese Federation.  
Suzaku: (Opens another door leading to a huge empty room.)  
Jordan: (Looks over his shoulder and whispers) Hey, the Lancelot would fit nicely in here.  
Lelouch: (Overhearing her) Don't even think it! You can't fit it through the doors.  
Ashleigh: Make it happen, Lulu!_

Jordan: (Gasps) Yeah! Make the doorframe expand!  
C.C.: (Snickers under her breath- still holding the machine gun.)  
Ashleigh: C.C., please don't laugh with that thing in your hands… Or it's about to get all 'Higurashi' in here…  
C.C.: It's a gun, not a hatchet.  
Ashleigh: Good point.  
Suzaku: How are we supposed to expand the doors…?  
Jordan: (Clinging to Lelouch's arm) Pllleeeeaaasseee???  
Lelouch: Get off of me! (Tries to shake her off)  
Jordan: (Bounces) Common! It won't take much! (Grabs the back of his head and slams his face into the doorframe) Just say: Expand!  
Suzaku: (Utterly confused)  
Ashleigh: Jordan, if you really want that to work, you'll need to find the doorframe's 'eye.'  
Jordan: (Releases him) Oh, yeah…  
Lelouch: (Falls to the ground after being let go) Dammit, I really wish you would think before inflicting pain upon people.  
Suzaku: Actually, if you want to know something weird we just found out about the Lancelot, we could fit it in here.  
Jordan: (Gasps again) What is it?! Tell me! (Pounces on him)  
Ashleigh: Oh, this'll be good.  
Jordan: (Does an incessant chant.) Tell me tell me tell me tell me!!!  
Suzaku: (Laughs) Hold on, hold on! (Reaches in his pocket for the keys and shows her the tiny Rubik's Cube keychain attached to it.)  
Jordan: Ooh… What's that?  
Suzaku: It's a Rubik's Cube made like the Lancelot's Core Luminous… apparently, when you mess it up, the Lancelot turns into a lamp… and when you solve it or break it, it goes back.  
C.C.: Does that make any logical sense?  
Suzaku: No, not really, but it works, I promise.  
Lelouch: This is useful information.  
Jordan: I wanna see! Show me Pretty Green Eyes!  
Suzaku: Okay, you can come with me. We'll put it in here for a little bit.  
Jordan: (Extends her arm and points towards the door) To the Lampelot! (Runs off)  
Suzaku: (Chases after her) How'd you know it was called that!?  
Ashleigh: Hmn… I wonder what the Gurren would turn into… (Looks to C.C.) A toaster?  
C.C.: (Shrugs)  
Lelouch: Don't even think about it.

_(Everyone goes outside)  
Jordan: (Trying to mess with the Lancelot cube.) Hey, you know... I wonder how __Japan__ was named "Area 11"...  
Ashleigh: Duh, Jordan. Basically Britannia went up to Japan, held a gun to their head, and said, "Give me your land!"__  
Jordan: No, I meant like what happened to the other 10 countries... and are there any more?  
Ashleigh: Hmm...._

_(Flashback time!)_

_V.V.: (With Kaleidoscope- thinking it's a telescope- trying to look up into the stars) Hmm... Once we've conquered the world, it's onto the solar system! (Turns the dial on the end of the Kaleidoscope) Whoa! That planet looks trippy! I'll name it... Area 69...  
Emperor: Yes... The Moon looks nice. If we get a dome and several tanks full of oxygen we could live up there._

_(Flashback over!)_

_Lelouch: Come on, even I know they're not that stupid.  
C.C.: How would you know? Have you ever had an intellectual conversation with them?  
Lelouch: Well, no... but...  
Ashleigh: Yeah, how would you know? You weren't even born yet!_

Jordan: Or maybe Eleven is Britannia's favourite number?  
Ashleigh: I don't know, but I can't help but think this entire 'World Domination' thing isn't just some giant ploy of re-creating one of those old 50's and 60's TV Shows...  
Suzaku: What do you mean?  
Ashleigh: Something like: 'Leave it to Britannia!' starring: The Emperor!  
Jordan: (Acting out all of the characters mentioned) (Looks at her hands, then gives a big smile with a cheery thumbs-up.)  
Ashleigh: Also starring: V.V.!  
Jordan: (Sits on the ground and mimes bashing action figures into each other. She then looks up and waves really big.)  
C.C.: (Snickers)  
Ashleigh: (Mumbles under her breath) Also starring: Kururugi Suzaku! Then it cuts to Suzaku standing amongst a field of fallen soldiers with blood on his hands, but when he looks up he waves his arm at the camera with a smile mouthing 'Oh, Britannia!'  
Suzaku: (Trying to get the Lancelot to turn into the lamp) Huh? Did you say something?  
Jordan: Nope! Oh, and don't forget the Guest Star Appearance by Zero!  
Ashleigh: Of course, of course!  
Lelouch: Are you two really this... creative... or do you just have too much time on your hands?  
Jordan: ... A little bit of both...  
Ashleigh: (Takes the Rubik's Cube from Suzaku) This episode of 'Leave it to Britannia' was filmed before a captive studio audience.  
Suzaku: What?  
Ashleigh: Don't worry about it.  
Jordan: And when you don't laugh, they shoot you.  
Lelouch: That sounds pretty accurate.  
Ashleigh: Mhm... (Changes her voice) What are you going to do today, Emperor?  
Jordan: (... in her normal voice...) I'm going to take over the world! (Pause) ... I said, "Take over the world!" (Another pause) That's a joke.  
Ashleigh: (Simulates the sound of a gun going off- then starts the fake-sitcom laugh.) Oh, Britannia. You and your tomfoolery!

_Suzaku: Are you done with the cube yet?  
Ashleigh: Here. (Tosses him the finished cube.)  
(The giant robot standing behind Lelouch, C.C., Suzaku, and Ashleigh- Jordan is clinging to the leg- has now turned into a lamp!)  
Jordan: Yay, now I can go to sleep with it!_  
Ashleigh: That's what she said...  
Jordan: (Shoves her) I didn't mean it like that! And that didn't even make sense!  
Ashleigh: Does ANYTHING we do make sense?  
_Lelouch: Wow... How did you even discover that it could do this?  
Suzaku: (Shrugs) Something about Cecile being pissed.  
C.C.: At least it will fit in the closet now.  
Jordan: Oh, I almost forgot! (She runs inside to put it in the safe-closet.)  
'Beep-beep!' (Suzaku's phone is going off.)  
Ashleigh: (Looks down at the phone) Your master is summoning you.  
Suzaku: Huh? ... Jordan! Wait! I need to take that to Lloyd! (Runs after her)  
Lelouch: Hmm, guess I need to get ready also.  
Ashleigh: ... Guess you'll need this then. (Pulls a folded-up cape out of her "Secret Mattress-Space" and runs.)  
Lelouch: Hey! (Runs after her)  
Ashleigh: What!? You have like a million of them!  
(C.C. is left standing there alone when Rivalz drives up on his scooter.)  
Rivalz: Hey... it's C.C. right? Do you know where Lelouch went?  
(C.C. suddenly pushes Rivalz into the sidecar and jumps on the scooter before driving off to get pizza.)_

Rivalz: Help! I'm being abducted!  
C.C.: That's what she said.  
Rivalz: ... What!?

Owari!

XxX

**Author's Notes-** I'm so, so, sorry for all of the 'That's What She Said' jokes… I want to slap anyone that says that phrase but, sometimes you just can't resist, you know? My random inserts into Jordan's Work created the name of this chapter. And also, the 'Leave it to Britannia!' stuff is actually a conversation I had with Adame-Senpai once… the Lampelot as well!

One more thing, did anyone besides Jordan and myself actually understand the Higurashi reference?

_**Author's Notes-**__ Ok, so, I'm not sure how the title of this came to be but whatever... and most of this we just came up with today... and I'm sorry I didn't write my last authors notes I was asleep and… I don't actually remember saying anything…_

**Of course you don't,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter: **(It might change so, keeping it a secret!)  
(Summary: The only time that you will EVER hear Jordan say that she doesn't want to ride in the Lancelot!)

x

**Actual E-mail dialogue:**  
Man, I miss all of our reviewers... You know, the ones that seemed to just.... die... sometime between late July and Early September...  
_Yeah, put the new summary into the chapter... that and if we don't get enough reviews then we're going to stop being funny._

We're joking, of course... but seriously, I'm thinking of sending flowers to some of you guys' families out there... At least you read to your bitter ends! Ah, the life of the reader is so short-lived and underapprieciated!


	16. Short Skirt, Long Jacket

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or the Power Rangers… or Kirby… or Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series…**

**Author's Notes-** This idea was stolen from an actual situation. Adame-Senpai on a play's opening night. It was not pretty. And yes, there is yet another reference to YGOTAS in this chapter. It's at the very end, and funny even if you've never seen the abridged, just not as funny.

I wouldn't exactly trust any sort of household remedies mentioned in this chapter... Seriously, don't do anything to your younger (or older) siblings, children!

The title of this chapter has absolutely nothing to do with the contents of it. I just so happened to be listening to the song Short Skirt/Long Jacket by Cake (aka the theme song to Chuck), and I didn't feel like being clever...

_**Author's Notes**__- I seriously ate 0.8 pounds of Skittles in under two hours… and that's only 'cause I was at school._

xXx

_It's late at night, and Suzaku is driving the __Lancelot__ back from a mission…_

_Suzaku: (Sighs) Why do the stupid terrorists have to attack at night!? I mean, you could probably get the same effect hiding in the __shadows of the sun__ as you would hiding in the dark! I just don't- HOLY CRAP WHAT IS THAT!?!  
(BOOM!)_

_(At the Clubhouse!)  
Jordan: (Bouncing) Suzaku's back! Suzaku's back! Lancelot time!!  
Ashleigh: How many Skittles did you have this time?  
Jordan: Too many to count!  
Lelouch: I watched her eat a pound in under two hours.  
Jordan: Lancelo... ugh! (Coughing) What's that smell!?  
Ashleigh: (Covering her nose) It couldn't be the Lancelot, now could it, Suzaku?  
Suzaku: (Walking out from the moon lights smoky mist) (A little embarrassed) Yeah, I… kindda ran over a skunk on the way back…  
Lelouch: (Also gagging) That's it, you're staying with Lloyd tonight._

(Note: I have absolutely No. Idea. How to interpret "_Walking out from the moon lights smoky mist_." Honestly. I've tried. I don't know what it means. I'll leave this to the Readers' imagination.)

Suzaku: (Desperately) Where do you think I've been!?  
Jordan: (Backing away with her shirt collar over her nose) He wouldn't let you stay?  
Suzaku: No… (Kicks the dirt) He wouldn't come out of the hanger… and wouldn't even let me put the Lancelot in it…  
Ashleigh: (Also backing away) Sucks to be you, then.  
Lelouch: (Almost completely inside the building) I'm sure a knight will have no problem finding a hotel.  
Suzaku: What!?!  
Jordan: Wait, we can't just abandon him…  
Ashleigh + Lelouch: Why not?  
Jordan: Because!!  
Suzaku: (Looks as if he's seen the grace of god… wait…) Jordan! (Walks toward her like he's about to hug her.)  
Jordan: (Scurries away) Nonononono!  
Suzaku: (Dejected) …  
Jordan: (Looks to the other two) We have to do something.  
Ashleigh: (Sighs) Well, there _are_ methods… but it'll require some experimentation.  
Jordan: I'm game.  
Suzaku: (A bit worried) Experimentation? I'm not going to grow a tail or something, right?? Right??  
Ashleigh: (Drags Jordan inside) We'll see.  
Lelouch: (Follows) Now I'm interested.  
Suzaku: (Shivers)

_C.C.: What is everyone doing out here so late?  
Ashleigh: Knight-Genius over there ran over a skunk.  
Jordan: (Grabbing on to C.C's sleeve) And now my pretty robot smells like it too!  
Lelouch: Any ideas on how to get the smell out, C.C.?  
C.C.: Well..._

_(Later…)  
(They come back with loads of tomato sauce, a washtub, and nose plugs.)  
(C.C. and Jordan climb on the __Lancelot__ and start pouring the tomato sauce on it.)  
(Ashleigh and Lelocuh throw Suzaku in the tub and start scrubbing him down.)  
Suzaku: Ow! Lelouch you're scrubbing to hard! You-  
(Ashleigh dunks his head in the tomato sauce.)  
Lelouch: Now I'm really enjoying this.  
(They let Suzaku (strapped in so he can't escape) and the Lancelot soak overnight.)_

_(In the Morning…)  
(Both Jordan, Ashleigh, and C.C. are woken up by hysterical laughing.)  
Ashleigh: LULU! Why are you being so loud this morning!?  
Lelouch: (Between laughs) Because the... tomato sauce... turned... turned... the Lancelot... and Suzaku's skin... PINK!_

Jordan: (Drops the pillow she was toting with her) WHAT!?!? (She runs outside to the Lancelot- all of the white parts had indeed faded to pink overnight.)  
C.C.: … pretty…  
Jordan: (Falls onto her knees, sobbing) NO!!! MY LANCELOT!!  
Suzaku: (Stumbles up) What do you mean YOUR Lancelot!?  
(Everyone looks up at him. Everything from his skin to his clothes to his hair is tinged with pink. C.C. turns away, biting her cheek, and Jordan and Ashleigh burst out laughing.)  
Suzaku: (Shakes some tomato sauce from his hair.) It's not funny!  
Jordan: (Can't breathe)  
Ashleigh: (Squeaking in between her laughter) You look like the pink Power Ranger!  
Suzaku: (Glares at the two before walking up and punching the now-composed Lelouch in the arm.)  
Lelouch: (Grabs his arm) What the hell was that for!?  
Suzaku: Who else was I supposed to hit!? The girls!?  
Jordan: (Calms down and runs to the leg of the Lancelot, trying to rub off the pink with part of her shirt.) Hey, it comes off! … I think… (She suddenly looks worried) Wait…  
C.C.: What's wrong?  
Jordan: (Runs away from the Lancelot) Gah!! The smell!!! It's still… still THERE!!  
Lelouch: What? The tomatoes didn't work?  
Suzaku: Now what are we supposed to do??  
Ashleigh: I don't know Kirby, any suggestions?  
Suzaku: (Narrows his eyes) Watch it.  
Jordan: (Not paying attention) I don't think just looking at it will work…  
Ashleigh: (Facepalm) Never mind… I think I have an idea…

_Later…_

_Ashleigh: (On the phone) No… No, GRANDMA LISTEN! Yes… Yes, skunk smell... Really? Ok then...Yes. Uh huh.  
Jordan: Ash! What's taking so long?  
Ashleigh: Grandma wants to make sure I'm eating right.  
Jordan (Takes phone from her hands) Yes, we're having a balanced diet of Skittles! Thank you and goodbye! (Hangs up)  
Lelouch: I wouldn't exactly call Skittles balanced…  
Suzaku: (Yelling from across the room) WHAT DID SHE SAY?  
Ashleigh: To use vinegar.  
Suzaku: WHAT?  
Ashleigh: VINEGAR!  
Jordan: Crap, we don't have any vinegar... and the __Lancelot__ is our only transportation… What are we going to do?  
C.C.: (Looks at Lelouch) You have Rivalz on Speed-Dial, don't you?  
(Lelouch flips out his phone and starts to dial.)_

(Rivalz stands by his scooter fairly far away from the rest of the group because of the stench.)  
Jordan: (Has her hands cupped around her mouth, yelling.) Okay! We just need a few bottles of vinegar! Do you have that?!  
Rivalz: YOU NEED WHAT!?  
Jordan: A FEW BOTTLES OF VINEGAR!  
Rivalz: MINT IN A JAR?!  
Jordan + Ashleigh: VIN-E-GAR!!  
Rivalz: VINNE'S CAR!??  
Lelouch: (Facepalm)  
Rivalz: WHO'S VINNE??!  
(Jordan and Ashleigh look at each other and storm up to Rivalz. Jordan rips the helmet off of Rivalz's head and Ashleigh mumbles "Idiot," before the two steal the vehicle.)  
Rivalz: (Looks around confusedly) WHAT DID I DO!?  
Suzaku: (Even further away- puts his head in his hands) I'm doomed…

_(Jordan and Ashleigh return an hour later.)  
Lelouch: Well, at least you returned safely.  
Ashleigh: Wow, Lulu actually worried about us?  
Lelouch: I meant with the scooter.  
Jordan: Yeah, but do owe the store manager a few dollars…  
Ashleigh: Yeah, sorry Rivalz, he got your license plate number, so you'll be getting that bill. (Points at Jordan)  
Rivalz: How come I always end up with all the trouble?  
Jordan: Riiiigghhht. Now who's pouring this on Suzaku? (Holds out bottle of vinegar) C.C.?  
C.C.: No way. Lelouch?  
Lelouch: Let Rivalz do it. (Takes the bottle from Jordan and gives it to Rivalz.)  
Rivalz: Aw man… (Slumps off)  
(For that night they soak the Lancelot and Suzaku in vinegar.)_

(The next morning, Jordan and Ashleigh walk outside hauling a towel and a garden hose.)  
Ashleigh: Ready to get out?  
Suzaku: (Gets up, shivering) I'm starting to think this isn't worth all of the trouble.  
Jordan: As long at it gets the smell out of the Lancelot!  
(Ashleigh then douses Suzaku and the Lancelot with cold water from the garden hose- the pink washes away. Jordan hands Suzaku the towel.)  
Suzaku: That water's colder than the vinegar!  
Jordan: We had to get the vinegar smell off too…  
Ashleigh: (From beside the Lancelot) Hey, check this out!  
Jordan: (Runs over) What? What's wrong??  
Ashleigh: Nothing's wrong. This is weird… You know, I didn't want to say anything earlier, but I've been noticing the aftermath of the Lancelot getting left out in the rain…  
Suzaku: That's not MY fault.  
Ashleigh: Yeah. Anyway, there were some rust spots showing up in the joints, but the vinegar got rid of them. (Points)  
Suzaku: Now it won't squeak whenever I use the Slash Harken?  
Jordan: Awesome! (Looks to Suzaku) Oh yeah, how did the vinegar work on you?  
Suzaku: I don't feel any different… My nose is still numb from all the vinegar, so I can't tell…  
Jordan: (Grabs his arm) Let me see. Eh, there's vinegar smell but… man, what kind of lotion do you use?? (Pokes his arm)  
Suzaku: Excuse me?  
Ashleigh: (Tries not to laugh) Are you serious?  
Jordan: I'm not lying! I think the vinegar made his skin soft! (Reaches up and touches his hair) This too!  
Suzaku: Wait, wait! You never said vinegar would do that!  
Ashleigh: (Shrugs)  
Jordan: Haha, he feels so girly!  
Suzaku: (Pulls his arm away from her) Shut up!

_Ashleigh: Alright Jordan, just smell him.  
Jordan: (Takes Suzaku's arm up to her nose) GUH! (Runs back immediately) It didn't work.  
Suzaku: Damn…  
Ashleigh: I would have never guessed without your reaction. (She goes to sniff the Lancelot.) (Coughing) Same for this thing.  
Jordan: Great, now what?  
(At this time Milly and Shirley walk up with Rivalz and Kallen.)  
Rivalz: Man Suzaku, I can smell you from the school gate!  
Suzaku: It's not funny.  
Milly: Rivalz told us what happened. We came to see if we could help him.  
(At this time __Lelouch__ and C.C. appear.)  
Lelouch: Don't you mean mock him, Ms. President?  
Milly: That too.  
Kallen: (Thinking) No way am I fighting you with that smell… It might rub off on the Gurren.  
Jordan: Are you guys just gonna stand there or help!? (Now a little frustrated.)  
Milly: Have you tried soap and water?  
(Everyone looks at each other.)  
(After a few seconds of standing in shock Lelouch and Rivalz drag Suzaku up to the shower and Jordan and C.C. go to the car wash... in the Lancelot.)_

Ashleigh: That's it. I quit. (Walks into the clubhouse and slams the door. A muffled and frustrated shout is heard a little while later.)  
Kallen: (Walks away) That was disappointing.  
Milly: Oh well… Come on Shirley, I guess this wasn't a very good way to procrastinate after all.  
Shirley: Alright.

(After Suzaku cleaned up and Jordan and C.C. took the Lancelot through the car wash one limb at a time, the smell was finally gone.)  
Suzaku: After all of that torture!? It was that simple!?  
Jordan: Don't even talk about it. Ever.  
Lelouch: Exactly. This was a complete waste of time.  
Suzaku: But… but… after all I went through??  
Ashleigh: Oh, cry a little about it! This never happened. Got it?  
Suzaku: What's with you?  
Jordan: She's mad because everything was so simple the entire time.  
Ashleigh: (Pulls at her hair) No, I'm pissed because I should've thought of that FIRST THING! God, why didn't I think of that!?  
Suzaku: What're you asking me for? No one can figure out how you two think.

_Jordan: Actually Suzy, we're not that hard to figure out.  
Ashleigh: Yeah, I think like (add whatever you want here), and Jordan thinks like a hyperactive psychopath would.  
Lelouch: Shouldn't you be getting the Lancelot back to Lloyd?  
Suzaku: Oh yeah! Wait, did she just call me Suzy?_

_(At the military base…)_

_Lloyd: Soap and Water? Well, I could have told you that!  
Cecile: Then why didn't you tell him when he tried to drop it off a few nights ago?  
Lloyd: Now what would be the fun in that?_

Suzaku: (Pauses) (Grabs Lloyd by the collar and drags him off somewhere...)  
(The sound of pummeling)  
Cecile: (Flinches) Not again…

Owari!

(Although…)

Back at the clubhouse…!

(Everyone, minus Suzaku obviously, idly stand around. A small and shrill-voiced boy wearing the Ashford High School uniform stumbles in- a hopeful look on his face.)  
Jordan + Ashleigh: (Jump back) ROLO!?  
Rolo: (Pining) Big bro, can I be in the fanfiction too?  
Everyone else: Shut up, Rolo.

Owari matashitemo!  
(End again!)

XxX

**Author's Notes-** I've always wanted to do that… but please, no hate mail, though I expect none. I'm not a fan of Rolo… seriously… (As if that wasn't obvious.) I would like him a lot better if I ever saw him use his geass to draw on someone's face… then maybe I'd give him a chance. Oh yeah, and we really do call Suzaku "Suzy" on occasion. It's actually gotten more frequent than PGE or God.

'Thank you's go out to the people that heard our barely veiled pleas for input! (If you want to be blunt, reviews.)

_**Author's Notes-**__ Blah-blah-blah, I hate my job..._

**That's not random at all,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter:** Untitled. (Summary: We finally think we have an idea that can get us out of Chapter Ten's massive shadow. You know what that means: Secrecy!)  
(Can anyone imagine Suzaku acting chill? No? Me either… but when has that ever stopped us before??)


	17. A Trip to Normalcy

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Gakuen Alice… or GameBoy… or Kool-Aid… or Super Soakers… or Nerf… or Dirty Harry… or Scrubs…**

**Author's Notes-** I know it's been over a month now, everyone… And that's primarily my fault… Since I'm the one that starts this chapter and I'm such a horrible procrastinator and a problem with lack of motivation. I say "primarily" because I want to blame Jordan a little… and she does have some blame for not spin-kicking me into submission…

And of course, I have to thank Kero-Sempai for granting us artistic liberties.

_**Author's Notes**__- Ok "OoboredoO"... We update every single month so please just chill! We can't tell you what day of every month but I swear: Every Month! If we don't update one month then you can complain. Anyways, thanks to Kero-Sempai for the idea Everyone x Suzaku and SenoritaLucha777 for the 'drugged' idea. Ok, so this chapter might not be as funny as Chapter Ten, but trust me, more funny to come!_

xXx

At the Clubhouse…

(…Even from outside, you can hear the commotion going on inside…)  
Ashleigh: (Running, with the cape tucked under her arm like a football.)  
Jordan: (Running in the opposite direction, with the key to the Lancelot gripped in her fist.)  
(The two cross paths and keep going. For some reason, the other two pursuing them don't decide to grab the one running straight for them… Lelouch and Suzaku stop to catch their breath.)  
Suzaku: We're not getting anywhere this way.  
Lelouch: All of the Skittles give those two limitless amounts of energy…  
Suzaku: We need some sort of plan.  
(Something that resembles a low-pitched drum-roll is heard.)  
Lelouch: They're headed downstairs!  
(Both of them race down the main staircase before splitting off again. Muffled shouting and banging is heard before all four of them come from all different directions into the 'lobby' and collide. They smash together into a heap on the floor.)  
(Collective groaning)  
Jordan: (Holding her head) Owowowowowow… Pretty Green Eyes, why is your skull so hard!?  
Suzaku: (With his hand on his forehead, looking dazedly at the ceiling) You didn't hit me, you bonked heads with Lelouch…. I think…  
Lelouch: (Tying to lift himself up but failing) I don't think that's possible while I'm at the bottom of this pile…  
Jordan: Are you sure it wasn't you, Suzy? I remember seeing green and then 'BAM!' everything went white…  
Ashleigh: (Lying face down) I'm pretty sure I just cracked the floor with my face…  
Jordan: Ash, that's the grout on the tile.  
Ashleigh: (Mumbling) Oh, whatever…  
Suzaku: What were we doing before this happened?  
Jordan: I don't really remember…  
Lelouch: Do you think the three of you could get off of me?!  
Ashleigh: (Still talking into the tile) I can't feel my legs anymore… Jordan's cut off the circulation…  
Jordan: It's not MY fault. Pretty Green Eyes is crushing my lungs!  
Suzaku: (Attempts to move) And I'm tangled up in this stupid cape!  
Ashleigh: It's not stupid-! Oh, forget it…  
(Pause)  
Everyone: C.C.!!!

_(C.C. walks in to find everyone on top of each other)  
C.C.: Well, what do we have here?  
Lelouch: Don't even think that.  
C.C.: Me? Why, I would never.  
Jordan: C.C., Pretty Green eyes bumped heads with me!  
C.C.: (Untangling the cape) Like a bull??  
Ashleigh: No, more like an accident in random chaos.  
Jordan: Someone make my head stop hurting already!  
Ashleigh: Mine too…__  
C.C.: Sorry girls, no aspirin. We used the last of it when Lelouch fell down the stairs.  
Ashleigh: But that was fourteen chapters ago!  
Lelouch: My head was hurting then as well…__  
Suzaku: Well, Cecile does have some medicine that I know of laying on her desk.  
Ashleigh: Well don't just stand there!__Jordan: Yeah, go and get it!  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Shove Suzaku out the door)  
(Suzaku sulks/walks all the way to Cecile's office because of the fact that Jordan still had the keys.)  
Suzaku: Here it is. (Grabs a white and blue bottle with the label scratched off) Well, it has no label… but since she does work with Lloyd, this must be aspirin._

(What Suzaku does not realize, is that the bottle has been written on in faded Sharpie. "Anti-Murdering-Lloyd Medication!!")  
Suzaku: (He quickly downs two pills before leaving.) (After walking all the way back, he returns to find everyone else sitting around in pain.) I've got the medicine.  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Look up at him like meerkats before almost tackling him to the ground)  
Jordan: (Pries the bottle from Suzaku's hand and empties a few pills into her hand) Thank god!  
Suzaku: You're welcome… I think…  
Ashleigh: (Takes the bottle from Jordan) Wait… this bottle has no label… Are you sure it's aspirin?  
Suzaku: Of course it is. What else would Cecile use to work with Lloyd?  
Ashleigh: Well… (Grabs two pills) Eh, the things I'm thinking of have never killed anyone. (Tosses the bottle to Lelouch)  
Lelouch: I'm not sure I'm comfortable taking mystery narcotics….  
Suzaku: Don't worry, I've seen Cecile pop those five at a time on Lloyd's really bad days.  
Jordan: Hopefully they work fast…  
Suzaku: I think so… I took some before I left and I feel okay… A little lightheaded though… (He starts to walk towards the couch and almost trips over air)  
Ashleigh: Try borderline dizzy.  
Suzaku: (Laughs strangely loud) Good one!  
Everyone else: (Looks at each other, realizing something) Not again!

_Jordan: Crap, now what are we gonna do?  
Ashleigh: I... I... (Grabs Jordan's shoulders and starts shaking her) I can't go through that again, Jordan! No more Suzaku speaking in the third person! NO MORE!  
Lelouch: No more Suzaku speaking in third person?! What about no more of Suzaku's shounen-ai tendencies!?  
Jordan: Just chill Ash. I mean, we also took the pills… So this time maybe it won't be as bad.  
C.C.: I'm not sure what you guys are talking about, these pills can't be that bad.  
Lelouch: (Looks over at C.C.- chewing some of the pills) C.C.! (Takes them from her)  
Ashleigh: But- but who's going to take care of us now?? We took care of them last time....  
Jordan: Hmm… I got it!  
(Twenty minutes later…)  
(Doorbell rings)  
Lelouch: I'll get it! (He peeks open the door and slowly pops his head out) Who's there??  
Milly: Lelouch, It's Milly, Rivalz, and Kallen. Remember, we spoke to you on the phone… You said it was important and to come over??  
Lelouch: I did?? …Oh yeah! Well, get in here! (Grabs Rivalz and shoves him in the door and onto the couch)  
Rivalz: God Lelouch, what's wrong with you?  
(Jordan and Ashleigh come bounding down the stairs)  
Jordan: KALLEN! (Jumps onto Kallen)  
Ashleigh: MILLY! (Jumps onto Milly)  
Milly: What's the matter with everyone?__  
Ashleigh: Well… remember when we told you about how Suzaku, Kallen and Lelouch all got drunk that one time?  
Kallen: (Looks embarrassed)  
Rivalz: Umm… guys?  
Milly: Yes, I remember hearing about that.  
Jordan: It's about to happen again… only in a different way.  
Kallen: (Shoves Jordan off) A different way?  
Rivalz: Guys??!  
Milly: (Sets Ashleigh on the ground like a toddler and walks over to the bottle of Cecile's pills on the ground) Ah, I see now.  
Kallen: Great, so now we have to baby-sit.  
Rivalz: YOU GUYS!!  
Kallen: What is it Rivalz?!?  
Rivalz: Could you get Lelouch off of me?! He passed out!_

Kallen and Milly: (Drag the unconscious Lelouch off of Rivalz and leave him in the floor.)  
Rivalz: (Sighs in relief) So what were you guys doing upstairs, anyway?  
Jordan: Oh, we were bored…  
Ashleigh: And we just went to- (She's interrupted by Suzaku suddenly bursting into the room, hauling a box of chocolates)  
Suzaku: HEY! You two. (Points at Jordan and Ashleigh) Yeah, you two… WHERE did you get these chocolates?!  
Jordan: (Snatches the box away from him) Don't eat all of them!!  
Ashleigh: Yeah, it's not like we can go and get any more… You know what they say: Do Not Hop Between Fictional Realities Whilst Under the Influence!  
Jordan: (Tempted to eat a chocolate) But it's not like the Gakuen Alice Universe would notice…  
Ashleigh: (Takes the chocolates away from Jordan and gives them to Rivalz) God knows where we'd end up if we went NOW! (Pause) (Snickers) Hey, Suzaku, where would we end up?  
Suzaku: (Taps his chin before raising a finger in the air dramatically) GUATEMALA!  
Rivalz: Hey, these chocolates aren't bad! (Holds the box out to Milly and Kallen) Try one!  
(Kallen, Milly, and for no good reason, C.C. all take a chocolate.)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Seem to have a delayed reaction because they yell after Milly and Kallen have already eaten the chocolates.) WAIT DON'T!!  
Kallen: I think you're a bit late…  
Milly: Why shouldn't we have eaten them?  
Jordan: They're Gakuen Alice Chocolates!  
Rivalz: And that means…?  
Ashleigh: God knows what the side effects will be! It was an assorted box!! (Pause) (Snickers) Hey, Suzaku, what would the side effects be?  
Suzaku: (Goes through the same motions as before…) SENSE OF IMPENDING DOOM!  
Kallen: Fascinating… Now what would the REAL side effects be?  
Rivalz: (Suddenly stands and approaches Kallen) Kallen. Have I ever told you how well endowed you are?  
Kallen: (Stumbling over her words- shocked out of her ever-loving mind!) Wh-what!?!  
Milly: RIVALZ! (Yanks him away from Kallen by the collar) What are you doing!?  
Ashleigh: (With that sense of impending doom…) (Hides behind Jordan) It's starting!!  
Kallen: (Slaps Rivalz across the face) What's the matter with you!?!  
Milly: (Steps in) Don't you hurt my Rivalz like that!  
Jordan: Whoa… This is all backwards!  
Suzaku: (Laughs and pumps his fist) Chick-fight!!

_(C.C. drapes an arm over Suzaku)  
C.C.: You shouldn't be looking at other girls, love.  
(Lelouch wakes up and stands)  
Kallen: Lelouch! (Jumps into his arms)  
Lelouch: Whoa... (Dazedly falls over again)  
Ashleigh: So... I'm guessing it was...  
Jordan: Love chocolate?  
Ashleigh: Mmh, very.  
Jordan: How do we make it stop? Rivalz and Milly are starting to scare me...  
(They look over to Milly throwing Rivalz on the couch and mounting him like a lion.)  
Ashleigh: Uhm... Give them some of the pills! Chill them out!  
Jordan: And Skittles!  
(Both Ash and Jordan run to get the pills and skittles and shove them down everyone throats)  
(Milly is now hanging upside down on the couch.)  
(Suzaku is now on the "invisible" phone "talking" to the Emperor.)  
(Lelouch is still holding Kallen up in the air while she plays on a GameBoy)  
(Rivalz is running around the clubhouse thinking he's an airplane. Noises and everything.)  
(Jordan now thinks she is the actual Lancelot.)  
(Ashleigh now thinks she is the actual Zero.)  
Milly: Wow... The world can be viewed from so many different directions...  
Rivalz: Yeah, it's a great view from up in an airplane! (Now at the top of the staircase)  
Lelouch: You guys are freaking me out! (Drops Kallen flat on her ass and runs upstairs to hide in a closet.)  
Suzaku: (Talking like a hippie) No, no, Charles, man! No, they SOOO can't hear us, man. Yeah... We're TOTALLY gonna kick Zero's ass, man!  
Ashleigh: (Takes "phone" away from Suzaku) NEVER!! You shalt never defeat me! (Dramatic hand gesture) For I am Zero! (Slams down the "phone," and laughs an evil laugh that sounds scarily like the real one's...)  
Jordan: (Pulls out a Nerf gun and fires at Ash) Pow! VROOM...!!! (...Attempts to make noises like the Lancelot..._)

Suzaku: (Climbs onto Jordan's back and points forward) Lancelot... LAUNCH!  
Ashleigh: ... Damn! (Looks around frantically) WHERE IS IT!?!  
Rivalz: (Buzzing around upstairs) Where is what?  
Milly: (Gazing lovingly at Rivalz) Your sanity?  
Ashleigh: (Waves her hand at Milly) No, no! I gave up looking for that ages ago! I mean my disguise! I'm completely exposed!  
Jordan: (Continues making mechanical noises and struggles to charge towards Ashleigh with Suzaku on her back)  
Ashleigh: (Runs upstairs) Curses! Foiled again!  
Kallen: (Catches herself watching Suzaku- who is abandoning the "Lancelot" and running up the stairs after "Zero.")  
Rivalz: (Eyes Kallen from his perch upstairs) Target acquired.  
Suzaku: (Aims Jordan's Nerf gun at Ashleigh) Now I've got you!  
Ashleigh: (Holds up the cape) Hahaha! I don't think so! (Throws it on and motions for C.C) C.C.!  
C.C.: (Stands in between them, sounding unenthusiastic) Stop... Don 't...  
Suzaku: (Pauses- staring at C.C.'s hair.) Wow...  
Ashleigh: (Tries to flail her arms into a pose but steps on one end of the cape and trips herself.)  
Suzaku: (Reaches for C.C.'s green hair) It's so... Can I touch it...?  
C.C.: (Backs up) What? Don't start saying strange things…  
(She turns and accidentally bumps into Rivalz)  
Rivalz: (Falls) Oof...  
Milly: (Stands up) Rivalz! (Runs up the stairs) Are you alright!?  
C.C.: (Grabs Suzaku's Nerf gun and aims it at Milly) Back off b-  
Jordan: -Watch your mouth!-  
C.C.: He's mine!  
Ashleigh: (Wraps herself up in the cape) Wide... open... spaces...

_Jordan: (Suddenly runs upstairs) This looks like a time for… BATTLE CHESS!!  
(Jordan and Ash grab a chessboard and hand Suzaku all the pieces.)  
Suzaku: (Somehow knows how to play) Ready... Aim... Fire! (Throws a pawn at them)  
Ashleigh: (Holds up the board. The pawn 'ping!'s off.) Ha! Missile blocked!  
Jordan: Prepare for second target!  
Suzaku: You might have dodged that one but get ready! You'll never escape my Black King!  
Lelouch: (Pops open the closet door ever so slightly) No!!  
Jordan: Not... not the...  
Ashleigh: BLACK KING! Take cover!  
(Both slide into the closet with Lelouch and slam the door.)_

(They hear all of the chess pieces pelt the door on the other side.)  
Lelouch: What's going on out there!!?  
Ashleigh: I don't know anymore!  
Jordan: Last thing I remember... Milly had C.C. in a headlock...  
Ashleigh: And Suzaku was braiding her hair or something... then he started throwing chess pieces at us!  
Jordan: Braiding whose hair? Milly or C.C.?  
Ashleigh: C.C.  
Lelouch; Everyone's loosing their minds! Nothing makes sense anymore!  
Jordan: Oh, yeah... and-  
(A loud boom is heard)  
Lelouch: What's going on!?  
(From behind the door, they hear everyone yelling)  
Suzaku: (Muffled by the door) Do you feel lucky, PUNK!?  
Ashleigh: ... I feel safer in here...  
Jordan: (Nods)

_Ashleigh: ... But we've got to do something!  
Jordan: Yeah, but what's the something we've got to do?  
(Both girls look at __Lelouch__ and look at each other then shove him out of the closet.)  
Jordan and Ash: DO SOMETHING!  
Lelouch: Uh- um....  
(Everyone stops to stare at him)  
Lelouch: (Whispering to the girls) I don't know what to say!  
Jordan: Here read off of this!  
(Ashleigh hands him a piece of paper.)  
Lelouch: I Lelouch Vi Britannia command you all to... Dance?  
Suzaku: (Ignoring him) Hey, this closet is pretty cool, man.  
Milly: (Following Suzaku) Yeah, just add a disco ball!  
Kallen: Maybe a few Lava-Lamps?  
Rivalz: You mean like these? (Magically has a disco ball and lava-lamps beside him with a fluffy pillow.)  
(They all enter the closet except Lelouch, and C.C.- who has mysteriously disappeared.)__  
Lelouch: Dance?? Why would everyone dance?? Hey, wait a minute! That was my closet first!  
(Lelouch scrambles into the closet)  
Jordan: It's a little crowded in here…__  
Suzaku: Hey, man, that just means less room to share the love and more love to go around, man!  
Ashleigh: That doesn't make any sense!  
Rivalz: Hey, look what I found! (Holds out the box of Gakuen Alice Chocolates)  
Jordan and Ash: NO!!  
(Everyone then punches Rivalz and takes a piece of the chocolate except Jordan, Ash, Lulu and Suzaku. (Because the girls have blocked him in.))  
Suzaku: Guys, let me through! I want some!  
(At this point everyone who ate a piece turns to look at Suzaku. They all get little hearts in their eyes.)  
Milly: (With her eyes in slits) My, my Suzaku… I never noticed how… how…  
Kallen: (Also with her eyes in slits) Gorgeous his green eyes are…  
Rivalz: (Sighs) Yeah.  
Jordan: Ash, I feel that we should move now...  
Ashleigh: Yep…  
(Both girls run into a corner of the closet.)  
Milly: (Pushes Rivalz) So what?? Suzaku prefers girls anyway!  
Kallen: Yeah, he's not like you Rivalz! (Points)  
__Rivalz: Hey! Lelouch and I are so fine we could turn him!  
Lelouch: Don't drag me into this!  
Suzaku: Wait a minute, now! We need to share the love!  
Jordan: (Giggles)  
Suzaku: There's plenty of Suzaku to go around!  
Ashleigh: (Giggles)  
Suzaku: Now you may all come to the Emperor of Love…  
Jordan and Ash: (Burst out laughing)  
(But the people surround Suzaku and he looks like he's really enjoying it.)_

Ashleigh: (Slowly stops laughing) Okay, this is starting to seem very familiar…  
Jordan: Uh-huh… but the closet isn't safe anymore! And they're blocking the door!  
Ashleigh: (Fiddles with the cape nervously) You don't have to remind me!  
(They look around the closet before hiding behind Lelouch and some coats.)  
Lelouch: You two aren't the only ones that want out of here, you know!  
Ashleigh: What else are we supposed to do!? Let them maul us!?  
Jordan: Well… well… Hey! Lulu, do you still have the bottle of Cecile's meds that you took from C.C.?  
Lelouch: (Pulls the bottle from his pocket) Yes… why?  
Jordan: What do you think!?  
Lelouch: Oh, no! You're not going to make this any worse!  
Jordan: Not for THEM! For US! Ash is about to have a freaking panic attack!  
Lelouch: How would nullifying our senses help the situation?!  
Ashleigh: (Gripping a coat so hard her knuckles turn white.) Can we decide on something please?  
Jordan: (Swipes the bottle) Decided! (She passes out medicine)  
(A few minutes later…)  
(Everyone in the closet sits in a circle singing Kumbaya.)  
(The door suddenly opens and everyone stops.)  
C.C.: (Sighs) What are you kids doing!?  
Ashleigh: C….C.? Is that you?  
Jordan: (Gasps) WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HAIR!?!

_(C.C is standing there in a business suit, briefcase, brown hair in a bun, and spectacles.)  
C.C.: My name is not C.C. anymore. It's Margaret. And I would like to thank you two. Those pills helped me become normal again.  
Lelouch: So, if they made you normal why did it make these two more psychotic??  
(Looks over at Jordan flexing her hand trying to bite at it every time it opens, and Ashleigh whispering "secret things" into the cape.)  
C.C.: I couldn't possibly tell you why. I'll have the boys at the office check into it. (Pulls out a cellphone and starts dialing.)  
Suzaku: Whoa... Isn't that the chick that had the awesome green hair?  
Milly: Yeah... it is!  
Suzaku: Dude! What happened?? Her green hair was so much more... funky, man...  
Jordan: (Finally bites her hand) I don't like this anymore!!  
Ashleigh: Me either!!  
(Both cling to Lelouch)  
Jordan and Ash: Make it stop!  
Lelouch: Hey! I... I... I don't know what to do!!  
(Lelouch starts freaking out with the girls.)  
C.C.: Alright. The boys at the office have a solution. Come on, I have the company limo waiting for me outside.  
(They all follow C.C. to a big and shiny office building.)_

('Margaret' enters the building chatting on her cellphone.)  
(Ashleigh, Jordan, and Lelouch follow her practically leaning on each other and looking around frantically.)  
(Suzaku follows behind them with Milly on one arm, Kallen on the other, and Rivalz close behind him looking uncomfortable.)  
Rivalz: (Gets stuck in the revolving door)  
Suzaku: (Sends Milly and Kallen to help him)  
C.C. / Margaret: (Turns to face them) Alright everyone. This is just an elevator. I want you to remain calm...  
(Everyone enters the elevator)  
C.C. / Margaret: (Presses a button) Now we just have to get to the fifty-fourth floor...  
Jordan and Ashleigh: What!?!  
Kallen: Don't worry. Even if you manage to fall...  
Milly: Suzaku will surely save you!  
Suzaku: (Watching a piece of lint floating in the air) (Snaps out of it) Huh, what?  
(The elevator dings and the doors open to show a big laboratory.)

_C.C./ Margaret: Alright everyone, line up along the wall.  
(They listen)  
C.C./ Margaret: Soak 'em boys!  
(About twelve men dressed in white lab coats run in carrying Super Soakers.)  
(They start to hose everyone down.)  
(In all the confusion, Suzaku ends up pulling Margaret into the spray.)  
Ashleigh: (Choking) What is this stuff?  
Jordan: It tastes sweet...  
A Familiar Voice: It's Grape Kool-Aid... It reverses the effect.  
(Everyone looks over at C.C., who is back to normal)  
(C.C. drapes her arms around Lelouch from exhaustion.)  
C.C: I never… EVER want to be that serious in my lifetime ever again.  
Jordan and Ash: C.C.!_

Lelouch: Your lifetime? Then you'll never be that serious... ever!  
C.C.: Precisely.  
Jordan: (Bounces) Yay! You're back to normal! (Tackles her and accidentally knocks off her "normal hair.")  
Kallen: (Picks it up) Is... this a wig?  
C.C.: (Smoothes out her hair) Of course.  
Milly: But... I thought that hair was a wig! (Points at C.C.'s green hair)  
Ashleigh: Nope, that's natural.  
Rivalz: (Collapses) Man, I'm exhausted...  
Lelouch: I would have rather dealt with the headache instead of the hell we just went through...  
Suzaku: (Rubs his eyes) No wonder Cecile can stand Lloyd so long...  
(One of the guys in lab coats squirts Suzaku again)  
Suzaku: Hey!  
Scientist: (Grins beneath his face-shield) That's what you get for talking bad about me, Kururugi!  
Jordan and Ashleigh: ... Lloyd??  
Lloyd: (Pulls off the shield) Of course! Who else would hire a girl with Lime Green hair?  
C.C.: (Still using Lelouch as a support) Lloyd. I'd like to be let go. I hope you understand.  
Lloyd: Of course, of course... we'll just have to find a replacement for you.  
Milly: Lloyd... What's going on? Why are you here? Do you know what's going on?  
Lloyd: Don't worry yourself with it Honey Bunches! Now Suzaku! Take everyone back to the academy in the Lancelot! (Tosses him the key)  
Jordan: (Checking her pockets) Hey, how did you get those back!? Uh, I mean... Yay... A ride in the Lancelot...!!  
(Suzaku hauls everyone back to Ashford. Kallen, Milly, and Rivalz leave to wash off the Kool-Aid.)  
Ashleigh: (Walks into the clubhouse and picks up the discarded pill bottle.) Here they are... The little demons...  
Lelouch: (Grabs the bottle) Get rid of them.  
C.C.: Gladly. (Takes the medicine and tosses it into the fireplace.)  
Jordan: When did we get a fireplace?  
Suzaku: I'm sorry guys... I didn't know that Cecile was taking... something like that!  
Ashleigh: It's alright, I guess... but next time, just go to the pharmacy down the street...  
Lelouch: Why didn't you think of that to start with?  
C.C.: Why didn't you?  
Suzaku: Maybe the headaches were messing with our logic...  
(Suddenly, Cecile bursts into the clubhouse.)  
Cecile: Suzaku!! Lloyd said that he saw you take my bottle of... aspirin. Do you still have it?!  
Suzaku: Sorry, Ms. Cecile. We just threw them away. We had a... rather bad experience with them.  
Cecile: NO!! (Paces) Oh god, oh god... What am I going to do now!?  
Jordan: (Backs up) Go to the pharmacy?  
Cecile: (Pause) (Puts on a wicked grin) Do you think the gun store is having a sale? (She bolts out of the room.)  
Suzaku: (Panicking and chasing her) Wait!! Ms. Cecile!! Don't!!

Owari!!

XxX

**Author's Notes- **Man, I love to break the fourth wall! And I have actually played 'Battle Chess.' It is quite fun. Don't go grabbing random bottles of medication either, children! You saw Cecile! And 'we' obviously didn't have fun with it. I'm still trying to figure out who my favourite character was this chapter…

For reference: One: If you do not know what a 'Meerkat' is: Check Google. Two: 'Shounen-ai' (A term I added into Jordan's script) means 'Boys-Love' and is a genre of anime and manga that is far less explicit than what you'd see in yaoi. Three: If you do not know what the 'Fourth Wall' is: Check Wikipedia.

_**Author's Notes- **__Ok, so, you all know Ash has The Amazing Cape of Zero's, or at least something close to it... and now I have THE LANCE-A-BEAR! Hahaha!_

_Look!  
i182(dot)photobucket(dot)com(slash)albums(slash)x241(slash)BubbleGumOfLondon(slash)001(dash)1(dot)jpg_

**Oh, not that blasted colour-it-yourself bear,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter: **Pending. (Summary: Well, I have an idea for it, I just haven't gone over it with Jordan yet. We collaborate, you know!)  
(Also, I was planning on adding my own little skit, 'Rolo's Corner,' similar to the ending of last chapter, but it didn't fit in. Maybe next time!)


	18. It's a Mad House!

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or The Lion King… or Fruit by the Foot… or Nintendo… or FLOW… or Shakira… or the Godzilla Movies… or Bugs Bunny… or Sega… or Wikipedia… or Pizza Hut… or PacMan… or Kool-Aid…**

**Author's Notes-** Happy Valentine's Day! Although, I hate this wretched holiday… We didn't take so long this time, and this is, by far, the longest chapter we've ever had!! With a Valentine's Day Special at the end!

_**Author's Notes**__- Ah, slumber parties… The start of all the craziness!_

xXx

_At the Clubhouse…_

_(It's a bright, sunny, summer day- around noon- when a certain someone notices another certain someone sneaking out of the Clubhouse…)  
Jordan: (Singing) Oh Pretty Green Eyes!!  
(Suzaku stops dead in his tracks.)  
Jordan: Where ya' goin' Suzy??  
Suzaku: Well, um… I was going to spend the night at Lloyd's.  
Ashleigh: (Pops up from behind Jordan) Why?  
Suzaku: (Jumps back) Bwah! How did you-?  
Ashleigh: Pretty Green Eyes, you're not going to have fun without us are you?  
Suzaku: No, no! It's just that I need some peace for a while…  
Jordan: Fine. Come on Ash.  
(Both girls storm back inside.)  
Ashleigh: Jordan, we're not seriously going to give up that easily, are we?  
Jordan: Of course not!__  
Ashleigh: Then how are we getting there?_

(Later that night…)

_(At Lloyd's!)  
Suzaku: (Sitting around in his hakama pants practicing Kendo with his shinai. –See Author's Notes!-) Lloyd, do you hear something? I think it's coming from the chimney…  
Lloyd: What? I don't have anything in the chimney.  
(At this point Lelouch and Kallen come falling down the chimney.)__  
Suzaku: (Jumps back again) What are you guys doing here?  
Lelouch: (Dusting himself off) Good question…  
Lloyd: How interesting! I never knew my chimney was big enough to fit people! (Sticking his head up the chimney to inspect it.)  
(Ashleigh and Jordan come tumbling down the chimney with everyone's luggage and fall right on top of Lloyd.)  
Lloyd: (Muffled) Ouuuch…  
Jordan: Sorry dude!  
Ashleigh: Suzaku… Who exactly did we land on?  
Suzaku: Lloyd.  
Jordan: (Gasps) You mean Lloyd Asplund? The creator of the Lancelot?!?  
Suzaku: (Nods slowly)  
Jordan: (Looks down at Lloyd) Your my hero!!!  
Lloyd: (Says something incomprehensible.)  
Suzaku: How did you get here!?  
Lelouch: Who else but Rivalz?  
Suzaku: How did you find the house!?  
Kallen: Milly, of course._

Suzaku: (Sighs) It's no use getting them to leave either, Lloyd. Once they're here, they stay.  
(Jordan has dug Lloyd out from under the luggage and is now hugging him.)  
Lloyd: (Laughs uneasily) Your sort of hurting me, deary.  
Kallen: So now what are we going to do…?  
Ashleigh: I dunno… Introductions?  
Suzaku: Oh, right. Lloyd, these are my… friends.  
Ashleigh: (Sarcastically) Don't force yourself.  
Suzaku: Anyway, this is Kallen, Ashleigh, Lelouch and-  
Jordan: (Now forcing Lloyd to dance with her around the room) And I'm Jordan!  
Lloyd: Suzaku, your friends are a little… Oh, how should I put this? Strange?  
Suzaku: Tell me something I don't know.  
Lelouch: Why am I always grouped together with these people?  
Ashleigh: Fine, not strange. Crazy. There, you fit into that category.  
Jordan: (Suddenly turns away from Lloyd) Okay, I'm hungry now! (Runs towards the bags and begins tearing through them)  
Kallen: (Backs away a bit) What are you looking for…?  
Jordan: (Pulls out a small tub of cake icing) This!  
Lloyd: Crazy does seem to fit all of you pretty well…  
Suzaku: (Facepalm) You don't know that half of it.  
Jordan: Lloyd, do you have any spoons??  
Lloyd: In the kitchen, of course.  
Jordan: (Goes to the kitchen and pulls open a drawer) Lalala… here! (Pulls out five spoons- one for each person.)  
(She takes a big spoonful of icing and licks it)  
Jordan: Hmn… I'll need something to drink too. Maybe Lloyd has something! (She replaces the icing lid and walks over to the refrigerator. She opens it and the icing falls out of her hands.) OH MY SUZAKU!!  
Suzaku: (Runs in) What? What is it? What's wrong? (Sees Jordan starting blankly into the fridge- he looks too.) Oh my self…  
Everyone Besides Lloyd: (Comes into the kitchen) What's going on?  
Kallen: What is all of that!?  
Lelouch: It looks like…  
Jordan: Look at all of this pudding!!

_Ashleigh: Oh! Now I get Rakshata's nickname!  
Lloyd: (Sliding in front of the door to close it.) Oops! You weren't supposed to see that…  
Lelouch: Why do you need that much pudding?  
Lloyd: Well, it's complicated, you see... (Lloyd goes into this long rant on how when he was young, his mother fed him pudding. Along with other explicit details in his scandalous pudding adventures as he grew up.) So, as you see, it's only natural this is my favorite food! (He turns to Kallen who is staring blankly at the refrigerator because she zoned out.) Oh, would you like some Kallen?  
Kallen: (Snaps out of it- yelling) I don't want any of your damn pudding!  
Lloyd: No need to be so rash.  
Jordan: Ok, so now I'm really hungry.  
Ashleigh: Hey, Suzy can we order a pizza?  
Suzaku: I guess so… Wait, why do you keep asking me? This is Lloyd's house!  
Ashleigh: Great! Lulu, we leave it in your hands! (Tosses him a phone)  
(The rest go into the living room…)  
Lelouch: Great…  
(Later, the doorbell rings…)  
Suzaku: I'll get it!  
(… And he opens the door to find...)  
Suzaku: C.C.??  
(… C.C.! Dressed in a Pizza Hut uniform and carrying a pizza.)  
C.C.: You left me._

Jordan: (Tackles C.C.) Yay! C.C's here!  
Ashleigh: Looks like she's finally landed her dream job, as well.  
Suzaku: Come inside already… I think you scared off her co-worker.  
(A car with the Pizza Hut Logo on top is seen speeding off- the tires screaming.)  
Jordan: (Grabs the pizza box) Great, I'm starving! (Opens it) Heeey!! Wait a minute! (Looks at C.C.)  
Kallen and Ashleigh: (Look into the box as well) I saw this coming.  
Lelouch: (Looks) (Facepalm) You just couldn't resist could you?  
C.C.: I don't know what any of you are talking about.  
Jordan: There are two slices of pizza missing!  
Suzaku: How did you manage to even get that job?  
C.C.: (Waves her hand at him) Long story. And there are only slices missing because it's a Pac-Man Pizza.  
Kallen: A Pac-Man Pizza?  
C.C.: Yes. You know, like the video game? Oh, you kids are probably too young to remember…  
Jordan and Ashleigh: We remember~!  
Lelouch: That's a sorry cover up for you hitting traffic on the way here.  
C.C.: Are you calling me a liar?  
Lelouch: That's exactly what I'm saying.  
Lloyd: (Walks into the room) C.C? Is that you?  
C.C.: Oh, Lloyd… This is your house?  
Lloyd: Of course! How have you been? I haven't seen you since the Grape Kool-Aid Incident!  
All Other Characters: (Shudder)  
Ashleigh: Didn't we agree not to talk about that ever again?  
Suzaku: Yes. We did.

_(After eating the pizza…)  
Kallen: Ok, I'm stuffed.  
Jordan: Yeah, now I need to work this pizza off…. Hey Ash, wanna race around the house?  
Ashleigh: Sure. (Runs into the kitchen and grabs some flashlights) Lets go!  
(They all line up outside at a corner of the house.)  
Lloyd: Ok, Ok. Here's the course: 3 times around the house, and the first to land on the sofa wins! Ready… Set… GO!  
(They all round the corner once, jump a bush and into the backyard.)  
(Lelouch, mad that he was left behind, decides to cheat a little. So he hides in the bushes and by the time Suzaku comes back around for his second lap, Lelouch trips him and he falls into the pond. He runs for cover.)  
(Jordan and Ashleigh now come around the corner.)  
Ashleigh: Hey, Jordan, stop a minute!  
Jordan: But we need to keep up with __Pretty Green Eyes__!  
Ashleigh: There's something coming up out of the water! (Points)  
Jordan: What? (She turns around to see a muck-and-seaweed-covered Suzaku slowly rising out of the water.)  
Both Girls: GODZILLA!!  
(Both run even faster)_

Suzaku: (Tries to shake off the slime) Wait! It's just me! (He runs after them)  
Ashleigh and Jordan: (Keep running)  
Lloyd: (Watches what appears to be a camouflaged Suzaku chasing a terrified Jordan and Ashleigh.) Hmn… Kururugi didn't strike me as someone with a cruel sense of humor.  
Kallen: (Running, is suddenly passed by the other two runners and a green monster) What the-? (So disoriented she trips over her own feet) What was that thing!?!  
Jordan: Now you know why I'm afraid of the dark!!  
Ashleigh: Have you seen Pretty Green Eyes, Jordan!?  
Jordan: No… (Gasps) Maybe Godzilla got him!!  
Suzaku: Wait, wait! No! It's me! Listen to me!  
C.C.: (Sitting on the roof) This is getting old quickly.  
Lelouch: (Agreeing with C.C., somehow manages to trip Suzaku again.)  
Suzaku: (Face-first into the ground) Oof!  
Ashleigh: Quick! Let's toss him back in Tokyo Bay!  
Jordan: (Grabs Suzaku's arm but quickly jerks her hand back) Ew… It's all slimy…  
Suzaku: (Grabs Jordan)  
Jordan: (Screams)  
Suzaku: For the last time! I'm not Godzilla!!  
Ashleigh: Then... how did you manage to get that stuff all over you?  
Suzaku: I'm not sure… I think I tripped over something…  
Kallen: (Runs up) Oh, Suzaku that was YOU? I thought it was… I don't know… a monster or something…  
Jordan: We thought he was Godzilla.  
Kallen: But doesn't Godzilla destroy Tokyo, fight Pterodactyls, and live under Tokyo Bay?  
Ashleigh: Yes, but I'm sure Suzy can manage all of that. Right, Suzy?  
Suzaku: No… and stop calling me that!  
Jordan: Fine, then do something amazing and Godzilla… -y… Anything, God, common!  
Kallen: Yeah, I haven't seen you do anything worth them calling you God yet…  
Suzaku: (Has had enough) What do you want me to do!? Dress in drag and do the hula!?!  
Everyone: (Turns to look at him)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: … YES!!

_(Lloyd and __Lelouch__, amused to see this, drag him upstairs to change his clothes while Jordan and Ashleigh throw the clothes or somewhat clothes through the door.)_  
(Note: I'm not going to do anything to the above sentence because… well, do I really need a reason anymore?)_  
(__Suzaku__ comes back dressed in a grass skirt, coconut top, lei, and a pretty purple flower in his hair.)  
Suzaku: And how is this supposed to prove I'm godly?  
Ashleigh: It'll prove you can shake your hips without Jordan having to show you.  
Jordan: Now hula!  
(C.C. pulls a boom box out from behind her and starts playing Shakria.)  
Suzaku: Wait- this isn't the hula!  
Lloyd: Now, now, Suzy. You must learn to go with what you've got!__  
Suzaku: (Mortified) (Slowly starts moving his hips back and fourth…)  
Kallen: (Laughing) Instead of him fighting the Black Knights, from now on they should just stick him in front of them to distract them!  
Lelouch: (Snickering) Yes, I'm sure Zero would stop fighting for a few minutes to watch this.  
Suzaku: Can I stop now!?  
(Jordan and Ashleigh both collapse on the couch from laughing.)  
Jordan: Yeah, yeah… Suzaku, you can stop now…  
Suzaku: Where do you keep getting these things anyway? (Points to the hula skirt)  
Ashleigh: That's from Lloyd.  
C.C.: Lloyd… why did you have a hula skirt?  
Lloyd: Well, you remember those scandalous pudding stories… (Goes into another long story) …and, well, the Pineapple King seemed to enjoy it.  
Kallen: (Shakes her head and screams) Enough with the pudding already!_

Ashleigh and Jordan: (Have wrapped Suzaku up like a mummy with Fruit by the Foot.)  
Jordan: I'm glad we didn't pay attention.  
Suzaku: That was… interesting, Lloyd. By the way, what are you two doing?  
C.C.: So now that we've ran around the house and dressed Suzaku in drag, what are we going to do now?  
Kallen: I don't know… See if Suzaku can turn water into wine?  
Suzaku: I've already tried… The answer is no…  
Ashleigh: Overthrow the government?  
Jordan: Save that for later!

_Kallen: Speaking of overthrowing the government… Where did Lelouch go?  
C.C.: I saw him sneaking upstairs a while ago.  
Jordan: Ugh, why does he always sneak out on our sleepovers!?  
Ashleigh: Spoilsport.  
(They all go up stairs and split up looking for Lelouch.)  
__Suzaku__: I found him guys! He's in Arthur's room.  
(They all peer in to see Lelouch collapsed on a couch with a book over his face.)  
Ashleigh: Wait… The cat has his own room!!?  
Suzaku: Yep.  
Ashleigh: … and it has a bed AND couch in it!?  
Suzaku: He likes the space.  
Jordan: Great, now how to wake him up?_

Ashleigh: You'd think that after the beach incident he'd learn his lesson.  
C.C.: Apparently not.  
Suzaku: (Laughing) Oh, yeah! I remember that!  
Jordan: Well, we don't have a swarm of seagulls this time… so what?  
Ashleigh: (Evil smile) I have an idea!  
(Later…)  
Kallen: (Whispering) Man, he's a deep sleeper!  
Ashleigh: Only on certain occasions.  
Jordan: Shh! You two are going to wake him up! (Finishes doing her part of the plan) (Relaxes) There… done…  
Ashleigh: Good. Ready, C.C?  
C.C.: (Places a stool on the floor next to Lelouch's head and puts a stereo/boom box on it.)  
Suzaku: (Backs up with his ears covered) You realize how angry he's going to be, right?  
Ashleigh: Of course. We've taken the proper precautions and we've done this before. Don't you remember?  
Kallen: So let's do it already!  
Jordan: (Presses the button on the stereo to turn it on)  
(The stereo makes some noise for a moment before blaring at full volume: JIBUN WOOO~!!)  
Lelouch: (Practically jumps out of his skin and lands on the floor) Gya!!  
Jordan: (Turns the stereo off and pulls out her earplugs) That was fun!  
Lelouch: (Lying dazed on the floor) … but… the graham crackers…  
Ashleigh: Graham crackers?  
Suzaku: Ugh, I don't like graham crackers…  
C.C.: I don't think he's noticed the other part yet…  
Kallen: (Shushes her)  
Lelouch: (Stands up with his hand on his face) What the hell was that!?!  
Jordan: You still haven't learned to not fall asleep at the wrong time, Lulu-Chan.  
Ashleigh: That, and we were bored.  
Lelouch: (Sighs) Wait… What the-?  
Kallen: (To C.C.) He's noticed now.  
Lelouch: (Tries to pull his hand off of his face) What the hell did you do now!?  
C.C.: You're a deep sleeper at times.  
Ashleigh: … and we were bored.  
Jordan: (Pulls out a tube of super glue) So we glued your hand to your face in an odd position! It's not like it wouldn't be there sooner or later.  
Ashleigh: Don't forget the red bird we had Suzaku draw on his left eyelid…

_Lelouch: (Now trying to pull off his hand with his other hand.) How do you expect me to… (Pulls Jordan, Ash, Kallen, and C.C. off to the side) How do you expect me to wear my mask with this!?  
Ashleigh: I guess the Black Knights aren't attacking until that glue comes off.  
Jordan: Hey Suzaku! Guess what? You get a two-week vacation!  
Lelouch: What do you mean two weeks!?  
Kallen: Hey Lloyd, what else is there to do around here?  
Lloyd: Well we could go play on the go-karts.  
Ashleigh: You have go-karts?  
Jordan: And you didn't tell us before?  
Lloyd: Why, yes.  
Both Girls: Why the hell not!?  
Suzaku: Might as well show them now.  
(They all go down to the basement after chiseling off some glue from Lelouch's face so now his hand is free but there's some skin missing.)  
C.C.: Lloyd, do all of these buttons do what I think they do? (Points to the buttons on the go-karts.)  
Lloyd: If you mean the buttons that work the go-karts like they were in Mario Kart then yes!  
Jordan: You mean I can throw turtles at people?  
Ashleigh: Can I be Yoshi!?  
Lloyd: Of course, of course. I'll set the teams. Jordan and Ashleigh. Lelouch and C.C. Suzaku and Kallen._

(Everyone lines up in tiny plastic go-karts by the side of the house.)  
Lloyd: Okay everyone, same course as before! Oh, and this time, try not to fall into the koi pond, eh Kururugi?  
Suzaku: (Glares)  
Ashleigh: Prepare to see defeat!  
Kallen: What makes you so confident?  
Ashleigh: Jordan and I grew up on Nintendo 64!  
Jordan: And I love throwing Turtle Shells at people!  
C.C.: (Grips her "steering wheel") Lelouch, I don't want to beat them… I want to embarrass them.  
Lelouch: … yeah, whatever.  
Lloyd: Ready… Go!  
(The go-karts speed off- Jordan makes it to Turn 1 first. (No R2 reference here!) The Song 'Party Join Us' plays in the background for some reason.)  
Jordan: (Goes through a Weapon Checkpoint!) Yay a banana! (Hits a button and her go-kart gains a tail of banana peels.)  
Kallen: (Manages to come by one of Jordan's banana peels- she spins out into a bush.) (Hits the steering wheel) Dammit!  
Suzaku: (Passing by) Common, Kallen! We're losing! (Weapon Checkpoint!) Hmn… I wonder what this does… (Presses a button)  
(All of the other players are suddenly struck by lightning.)  
Ashleigh: (Staring into space) He really is God…  
(The effect eventually wears off)  
Kallen: (Out for revenge- hits a jump and a Weapon Checkpoint!) Now I've got you… (Button)  
Jordan: (Drifting through the turns singing along to the music) Party, party… Join us, join us… Party, par- (She notices a target on her back) Noo!!  
(A green shell hits Jordan and she flips a few times. Kallen rides by laughing.)  
C.C.: (Hits her first Weapon Checkpoint!) Ah… (Hits a button)  
(A red turtle shell flies out of her go-kart and heads for the next person in front of her… Lelouch.)  
Lelouch: (Takes a sharp curve and avoids it.) What are you doing!? (He accidentally hits a Weapon Checkpoint!) … Hm. (Presses a button)  
(The super-rare spiky blue turtle shell flies out and tears through the course… all to hit the person in first place.)  
Suzaku: (Hit with the blue turtle shell) What the-? (Goes flying off of the course) Gaah!!  
Lelouch: … That was lucky.  
A Voice from Nowhere: How on earth did you manage to get that one!?  
Lelouch: (Looks around- sees nothing.)  
Jordan: (Coming up from behind) Ash, where'd you go??  
Ashleigh: (Suddenly appears driving beside Lelouch- he jumps.) I'm right here! My Weapon Checkpoint was invisibility!  
Jordan: (Weapon Checkpoint!) Yay the star!! (Presses a button and starts flashing all sorts of colours. She gains speed and comes up behind Lelouch, spinning him out.)  
C.C.: (Drives by) I have to do everything, don't I?

_(As they reach the Finish Line, C.C. is the first through the gate but unfortunately Lelouch is last. So Kallen and Suzaku won because Jordan was distracted by the balloon on the back of her Kart and ran off the track.)  
Ashleigh: Of course we all lost to the two strongest people… You're just lucky we weren't playing Sonic!!  
C.C.: At least you didn't get stuck with the weakling.  
Lelouch: (Just now pulling up in his kart.) Hey!__  
Ashleigh: True, Jordan does have good moves, until she gets distracted.  
Suzaku: Moves? (Goes up to Jordan) Show me your moves!  
Jordan: (Yells) Falcon Kick! (Kicks Suzaku in the shin)  
Lloyd: Yes, well… (Yawns) I think I'll be going to sleep, so feel free to wander and enjoy yourselves.  
(All the young people head back upstairs to talk...)  
Suzaku: (Holds up a Skittle) Hey, you guys… How to they get the little 'S' on the Skittles?  
Ashleigh: Oh, I'm sure they use a little needle and run it through a machine…  
Lelouch: I beg to differ.  
(Ash and Lulu get into a huge argument over this.)  
Jordan: (Finally pushing them aside) Look, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure this out! Although… Go fetch Lloyd!  
Suzaku: Come on, I'll show you where his room is.  
(They all go up to Lloyd's room and peer into it.)  
Kallen: Umm, why does Lloyd sleep with his screwdriver and the blueprints to a Knightmare Frame?_

Suzaku: (Walks in and pokes Lloyd once) Hey, Lloyd… (Poke) I have a question for you.  
Lloyd: (Mumbles something. He says "naughty" and "sakuradite" in the same sentence, but the rest is mush. No one wants to know.)  
Suzaku: How do they put the tiny 'S' on the Skittles?  
Lloyd: (Not really awake) … ehm… lins…  
Jordan: Huh??  
Suzaku: Say that again?  
Lloyd: (A little more annoyed) … ose… amg… ens…  
Kallen: (Sighs) Could you speak clearly?  
Ashleigh: (Kicks the bed) Say it right!! I want to know the answer so I can prove him wrong! (Points at Lelouch)  
Lloyd: (Suddenly) (He swings his screwdriver around like a weapon) Those damn gremlins!!  
Suzaku: Gremlins?  
Jordan: What's a gremlin?  
C.C.: (Shrugs)  
Ashleigh: Is this some kind of failing attempt at a Bugs Bunny reference?  
Lelouch: Probably.  
Lloyd: (Swings the screwdriver around again) Always… messing up my Knightmares! Those gremlins!!  
C.C.: I don't think we're going to get a straight answer out of him.  
Jordan: Well that only leaves us one choice.  
Kallen: Make the two arguers play Roshambo to decide who's right?  
Suzaku: What is… Rah… Sham… Bow?  
Ashleigh: No, no! Not Rock, Paper, Scissors!  
Jordan: Wikipedia!  
(Later… Suzaku quickly uses Lloyd's computer.)  
Suzaku: (Types) Here it is! Huh. It says here that they stamp it on with a high-speed roller…  
C.C.: So they were both wrong.  
Jordan: Does it say what it's stamped on with??  
Suzaku: (Scrolling) Umm… no, they don't, actually.  
Kallen: That's strange… Wikipedia usually has everything.  
Jordan: Tell me about it!  
Ashleigh: I think it's just sugar…  
Suzaku: Let's not start this again, alright?

_Jordan: Hey Pretty Green Eyes, where are all of us going to sleep tonight?  
Suzaku: Well… We could all have our own rooms.  
C.C.: Really?  
Lelouch: I suppose, this place is big enough for it.  
Suzaku: Yeah, just go find a room.  
(They all go to find rooms, but come back to find Suzaku a few minutes later.)  
Suzaku: (Wakes up) (Sleepily) Huh? (He looks around to see Lelouch, C.C., Jordan, Ashleigh, and Kallen all surrounding his bed.)  
Jordan: Pretty Preen Eyes… we can't get to sleep.  
Suzaku: Why not?  
Ashleigh: All of those Knightmare Frames...  
Suzaku: Lelouch, you too?  
Lelouch: (A little paranoid.) Yeah, well… People I can handle, but Knightmares… When I look them in the eye they just don't want to cooperate.  
Suzaku: C.C.? Kallen?  
Kallen: When I tried kicking them apart they just put themselves back together.  
C.C.: It really is unsettling.  
Suzaku: Fine. I guess… you can all stay in here…  
Jordan: Thank you Suzy! (Pushes Suzaku over in the bed.)  
Ashleigh: Yeah, thanks. (Pushes Suzaku over even more.)  
C.C.: Suzaku, this is very nice of you. (Pushes Suzaku over even more...)  
Kallen: (Relaxes) Ah, no robots! (Shoves Suzaku completely off the bed.)  
Suzaku: (Hits the floor) Hey! Damn-! What-? … How did I end up the floor??  
Lelouch: I usually ignore it… You'll get used to it._

(The next morning…)

(Everyone wakes up to the sounds of making breakfast!)  
Lloyd: (Walks into his kitchen) Wha?  
Jordan: (Grinning while holding a pan of muffins) Good morning, Lloyd!  
Lloyd: What are you two doing in here?  
Ashleigh: (Flips the pancakes) Isn't it obvious? We're making breakfast, of course.  
Jordan: Yep! (Hands him a newspaper, spoon, and a plate of purin.) Here's yours!  
Ashleigh: Do you like Orange Juice or Coffee?  
Lloyd: (Doesn't know what to think) Ah… coffee's fine… (Sits down and enjoys his purin.)  
Suzaku: (Walks in yawning) What's going on in here?  
Ashleigh: (Sighs) Does no one know what making breakfast looks like!?  
Jordan: (Puts a bowl of eggs, a plate of bacon, the muffins, the pancakes, the sausage, and the fruit all on the big table which Lloyd sits at.) Ohayo~! Pretty Green Eyes!  
Suzaku: (Stands in awe at all of the food) … Ohayo…  
Kallen: (Stumbles in half-awake) (Sees the food) Holy! Did you guys make all of this??  
Jordan: Yep! And good morning!  
Lelouch: (Walks in and doesn't say a word. He points to the food and looks questioningly at Suzaku.)  
Suzaku: (Points to Jordan and Ashleigh) They made it.  
Lloyd: (Sips his coffee) I take it these two are morning people…  
Everyone else: Of course not!  
Ashleigh: Do you know how much coffee we've had??  
Jordan: (Bounces up and down) Uh-huh!  
C.C.: (Drags herself into the kitchen) That doesn't smell like pizza.  
Kallen: (Takes a bite out of some toast) Of course she'd say that.  
Ashleigh: Don't worry, C.C. We made you a special breakfast.  
Jordan: (Hands her a Breakfast Pizza.)  
(A Breakfast Pizza is just like a normal pizza but topped with sausage and/or bacon instead of pepperoni.)  
C.C.: I suppose I forgive you, then.  
Suzaku: (Has a plate of food) I didn't know you two could cook.  
Ashleigh: There's a lot of things you don't know.  
Lelouch: (Almost chokes on a strawberry)  
Jordan: Don't worry about it… Let's just eat!

(Later…)

C.C.: Goodbye Lloyd, we've had a wonderful time.  
Suzaku: Yeah, sorry about everyone just sort of… crashing…  
Lloyd: (Waves his hand at him) Don't worry about it, Suzaku! You know what they say, the more the merrier!  
Lelouch: Still, I think it's about time we left.  
Kallen: (Points behind her) Um, guys?  
(She's pointing towards Jordan and Ashleigh, who are clinging to Lloyd saying, "We don't wanna go!")  
Suzaku: Common, we can't stay here forever!  
Lloyd: It's true, girls, you'd better go back. Suzaku, why don't you just take everyone back in the Lancelot? (Tosses him the key)  
Suzaku: Sure.  
Jordan: (Lets go of Lloyd) Lancelot!! (Runs out of the door)  
Kallen: Well, that solves one problem…  
C.C.: Does she not remember that the cape is back at the academy?  
Ashleigh: No, I have one in my… (Looks around to see who has her bag) … What are you doing!?  
Lelouch: (Unzipping the bag and looking through it. He pulls out the cape) So this is where it went.  
Ashleigh: (Chases him out of the house) You!! Give that back!!  
Suzaku: (Sighs) All of this happens too often…  
Lloyd: (Takes them all to the door) I'm sure it does.  
C.C.: You'll have to come and see us at the academy sometime, Lloyd.  
Lloyd: (Laughs) Don't count on it.  
(He slams the door on them.)

Owari!

XxX

**Author's Notes-** Okay, this chapter was extremely long!! We hope you enjoyed reading it as much as we did writing it. (At least, I do.) I really do love Mario Kart and Sonic… you have no idea. And now to explain the things I need to:

Hakama- The long pants worn under the kimono.  
Shinai- A wooden sword used whilst training in Kendo.  
Roshambo- (Explained a few lines down from when it was mentioned) Rock, Paper, Scissors.  
Ohayo- (If you didn't know already…) Good Morning!  
Purin- Google it. I don't have to tell you everything, right? It's a type of pudding.  
Party Join Us- The Ending Song of Shin-Chan! Even though I hate that show...

_**Author's Notes-**__ Ash and I have actually raced around the house! We have a video of it, but you can't see anything 'cause it was after midnight on New Years…_

_This is what you can here out of all the giggling:  
Jordan: (With a yellow light, I also have a hat on my head.)  
Ashleigh (White light)_  
_Karen: Go!  
(Giggling)  
(Later… the white light suddenly slides down the screen.)  
Jordan: Did she just fall?  
Karen: Yep!  
Ashleigh: … Get back here!!  
Jordan: Nooooo!__  
(We run away) (Heavy breathing…) (We come back)  
Karen: Two laps too many?  
Jordan: Yes.  
Ashleigh: … So that's what I tripped over…  
Jordan: I win!!  
Ashleigh: I tripped over a brick… halfway through.__  
(Back inside)  
Emily: Who won this time? (This was our second time doing this. Ash won the first time cause of the __Christmas__ tress.)  
Karen: She did (Referring to Jordan.)  
Jordan: Yeah, 'cause I didn't stop to look at the __Christmas Trees.__  
(She had light-up Christmas Trees outside that were just too pretty to pass by!)_

_There's an alternate ending! Assuming you wont take my first. Hope everyone had a Happy V-day! I, personally, had too much Cheesecake…_

**I tripped over a brick… In my own backyard… and my Yoshi shirt too!,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Special Anecdote! **

The Suzaku x Everyone pairing is not over yet! Especially for Valentine's Day!

Suzaku x The Girl that Marks the Wall…  
(Note: This is set during R2… Let's just say the Geass kicked in again (?)…)  
Suzaku: (Running late for class… Trying to hurry, he rounds a corner too fast and bashes into someone.) Ow… Oh, I'm really sorry. You're not hurt are you?  
Girl: (Looks up with red eyes) Huh? Oh… (Looking around) Where did it go?? I have to have it… I have to…  
Suzaku: (Unsure of what's going on at first) What are you looking for?  
Girl: (Finds her stick of chalk) Found it! (Stands up and puts and X on the wall. She giggles creepily like always.)  
Suzaku: (Glances over the immense number of X's on the wall) Why do you keep marking that wall??  
Girl: (Snaps out of the Geass, her eyes are… blue (?).) Huh? What are you talking about? (Drops the chalk) Not again…  
Suzaku: What?  
Girl: (Brings her hands to her face) Again! Every day… At just about the same time every day… It never fails…  
Suzaku: You mark the wall every day?? Why?  
Girl: What? I- I don't mark the wall! At least… I don't remember doing it… For almost a year, I wake up standing in front of this wall… with no idea how I even got here…  
Suzaku: So, you don't remember marking the wall? (The girl shakes her head and Suzaku finally get it.) (Thinking) Is it… geass? No, why would he make her do something so pointless as to mark a wall every day? Then again…  
Girl: I've even starting seeing a psychiatrist about it. I'm so paranoid. I can't trust myself to be alone anymore… I just… I could go out and kill someone and just block it out, ya know??  
Suzaku: (Looks at her, shocked) No, no… You won't do that, I'm sure. Even… Even I've ended up in places with no recollection. (Thinking) That's right. I've also been subjected to doing things against my own will.  
Girl: … Really? You, a Knight of the Round?  
Suzaku: (Smiles) Of course. A lot of people have.  
Girl: (Blushes the slightest bit)  
Random student: (Let's say its… uh… Milly!) Milly: Suzaku!! Where are you?? Class started five minutes ago!!  
Suzaku: (Snaps out of it) Oh, coming, Madame President! Sorry, I have to go… Bye.  
Girl: Bye…  
(And from that day forth, Suzaku gained one stalker.) (LEVEL UP!)  
Owari!

**AN: **Okay… I tried to make it a little funny… but I think it just turned out to be cute/sappy. Take it anyway you want! Suzaku's Angst is incredibly easy to write. Rolo's Corner will be in the next chapter, I promise!

**True End**


	19. Anecdote Chapter

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or the Looney Toons… or Happy Feet… or That Song by That Guy… or the Knights of the Round Table… or Hinamizawa Syndrome…**

**Author's Notes-** Okay! We'll update! We'll update! Just make the harassing e-mails stop!! I'm being threatened by a Yakuza! Ahh!!

(Jordan and I worked on the top section together so the font doesn't change. There are a few exceptions. If it wasn't obvious, this is sadly a filler chapter.)

_**Author's Notes**__- Sorry for the late update but my computer crashed and now no internet... And we might not update for a while unless we get more reviews!_

xXx

_**Cliff-Diving**_

We polled some people, asking them: If you jumped/were pushed off of a cliff, what would be your Famous Last Words? No one would answer… so we did it for them.

**C.C**- (See scene below…)  
Lelouch: (Bored, sees C.C. standing on the edge of a cliff. So he pushes her off for funsies.)  
C.C.: You know I'll just come back right….?? (Splash)  
Lelouch: (Watches the splash settle into the sea) (Turns around and C.C. is standing right in front of him.) Gah!  
C.C.: (Grins) I told you I'd come back. (Pushes him off)****

Suzaku- (Looks over the edge of the cliff and suddenly turns away, pacing back and forth) Ahh, no, I can't do this! I can't do this! … (Takes a deep breath) Alright! I can do this! (Looks… turns away again) No I can't! Uhm, it's okay, I just have to trick myself! (Goes to the edge of the cliff) Hey look at that! (Looks) What? (Falls) AHHHH!!!_ / (Stops mid-air like a Looney Toon) You forget! I can defy the laws of gravity!!_

**Lelouch**- (After being pushed off the cliff in retribution by C.C…) You'll burn for this, witch!!!!! (Splash)  
**Kallen**- This is too anti-climactic…_ / Maybe if I take off all of my clothes I can make a parachute…!_  
**Shirley**- (Girlish scream)  
**Milly**- But I haven't achieved world domination yet!!  
**Rivalz**- This is for you Milly!  
**Nina**- This is for you Table!  
**Nunnally**- [It pains me to say this, but…] Suzaku, could you close that window, please? It's getting a bit drafty…  
**Ohgi**- No!! My hair!!!  
**Villeta Nu**- Great, now I'll get stuck mid-air with Ohgi for seven weeks again…  
**Jeremiah**- This is for you Lady Marianne! Let us drink orange juice in the afterlife!  
**Clovis**- (Girlish scream)  
**Cornelia**- (Sticks her sword into the side of the cliff on the way down and saves herself)  
**Euphemia**- (Claps her hands) Hurray!!  
**V.V.**- (His hair gets caught in a tree branch and stops him)  
**Schneizel**- This is NOT fabulous!  
**Lloyd**- (Laughs) At least it's better than Cecile's cooking!  
**Rolo**- NOO!! Brother, save me!! Save me!! Please, save me- … Is he LAUGHING!? (Splash)  
**Tohdoh**- No! My eyebrows!  
**Anya**- (Splat!) Recorded.  
**Gino**- Haha! This falling stuff is great! Commoners really know how to have an adrenaline rush!  
**Guilford**- PRIIINCEEESSS!!!!!  
**Arthur**- Meow! (But I haven't achieved world domination yet!!)

_**Spin 'N Speak**_

From Britannian Toys Inc. comes a brand new innovation of learning! Simply pull the lever and the arrow spins! Whatever character the arrow was previously on will say their 'Catchphrase' for you! ("The [Blank] says…!")

**C.C**- But why is the pizza gone?  
**Suzaku**- SUZAKU KICK!!  
**Lelouch**- OBLITERATE BRITANNIA~!  
**Kallen**- Argh, these clothes are so inhibiting!  
**Shirley**- PERV!  
**Milly**- Ahahahahahackcoughcough!!  
**Rivalz**- What light through yonder window breaks… It is the East, and Milly is the Sun!  
**Nina**- Princess Euphemia, I need your goodness…!  
**Nunnally**- ME-YOW!!  
**Villeta Nu**- But I got someone nice…  
**Jeremiah**- Behind from back!?!  
**Clovis**- (Sings God Save the Queen)  
**Cornelia**- Join us for your welcome soirée… Care for a dance? / _Piss off!_  
**Euphemia**- Don't be such a tool, Suzaku.  
**Charles**- It's ME!! (Voice cracks)  
**V.V.**- OH YEEEAAAHH!???  
**Schneizel**- FI-YA! ["Fire," long story…]  
**Lloyd**- (Girlish laugh) You spin be right round, baby, right round, like a record, baby, right round, round, round!  
**Rolo**- (Sings dramatically 'We are Brothers Forever' by that guy from American Idol) [Who even watches AI anymore? Not like I ever did, but…]  
**Tohdoh**- LONG LIVE JAPAN!!  
**Rakshata**- Ohohoho! [The Rakshata Laugh?]  
**Anya- **Tag. You're dead.  
**Gino-** We're Knights of the Round Table! We dance when'ere we're able! (The Knights of the Round Table Song. Look it up. Now!)  
**Arthur-** Arthur BITE!!

_**Character Ice Cream Flavors**_

Each character has their own designed and flavored Ice Cream! Though, there tend to be some side-effects…

**C.C.**-  
Colour: Lime  
Flavor: Habanero (Yes, it really exists)  
Side Effect: When you eat enough tubs your voice turns monotone and you earn a C.C. Plushie. (Eternal youth is rare, but possible)

**Suzaku**-  
Colour: Emerald Green  
Flavor: Blood and Teeth (You'll see why)  
Effect: Whenever you open it Spinzaku comes and kicks you in the face. Hence, the flavor.

**Lelouch**-  
Colour: Purple with a red Geass sigil in the middle  
Flavor: Geass-Berry  
Effect: After the first bite, you're compelled to finish the entire tub of ice cream.

**Kallen**-  
Colour: Fire Red  
Flavor: Cherry  
Effect: The ice cream gives you an impeccable urge to take a shower.

**Shirley**-  
Colour: Yellow-Orange  
Flavor: Orange-Pineapple Sherbet  
Effect: You start hallucinating and stalking. (Stomach cramps happen rarely)

**Milly**-  
Colour: Gold  
Flavor: Lemon  
Effect: Breast growth and loss of your sense of volume.

**Rivalz**-  
Colour: Blue  
Flavor: Superman Ice Cream  
Effect: If you buy enough tubs you qualify to win a scooter!

**Nina**-  
Colour: Gray  
Flavor: Sherbet  
Effect: Insanity and OCD.

**Nunnally**-  
Colour: Lavender  
Flavor: Cotton Candy  
Effect: As the flavor says, it tastes like happy!

**Ohgi**-  
Colour: Burgundy  
Flavor: Raspberry  
Effect: Disloyalty

**Villeta Nu**-  
Colour: Silver  
Flavor: Blueberry  
Effect: Your hair styles itself in strange ways

**Jeramiah**-  
Colour: Orange  
Flavor: Orange  
Effect: Inexplicable LOYALTY!

**Cornelia**-  
Colour: Purple  
Flavor: Mixed Berry  
Effect: Sudden pugnacious attitude

**Euphemia**-  
Colour: Pink  
Flavor: Bubble Gum  
Effect: Genocide

**Charles**-  
Colour: Cream  
Flavor: Apples and Cinnamon  
Effect: You're tricked into believing that you're eating oatmeal

**V.V**.-  
Colour: Pale Yellow  
Flavor: Banana  
Effect: Stealing the catch phrases (i.e. OH YEAAHH!?)

**Schneizel**-  
Colour: Royal Blue  
Flavor: Jägermeister  
Effect: Extreme FABULOUSness

**Lloyd**-  
Colour: Turquoise  
Flavor: Sakuradite  
Effect: Flamboyant-ness

**Cecile**-  
Colour: Navy  
Flavor: Wasabi and Peanut Butter  
Effect: Total loss of all culinary abilities

**Rolo**-  
Colour: Magenta  
Flavor: Cranberry  
Effect: Hinamizawa Syndrome

**Tohdoh**-  
Colour: Pale Green  
Flavor: Green Tea  
Effect: Incredible eyebrows

**Rakshata**-  
Colour: Deep Red  
Flavor: Ginger (Yes, it exists too)  
Effect: Narcolepsy

**Anya**-  
Colour: Light Pink  
Flavor: Marshmallow Swirl  
Effect: Memory loss

**Gino**-  
Colour: Green with a pale green Dollar Sign in the center  
Flavor: Money  
Effect: The ability to Screw the Rules! (You have money)

**Guilford-**  
Colour: Deep Brown  
Flavor: Pomegranate  
Effect: Chivalry

**Arthur-**  
Colour: Gray with a black spot  
Flavor: Fudge Brownie  
Effect: You start to bite people (… To steal their powers…)

XxX

_**Nunnally's Day out**_

_(__Lelouch__ and Nunnally are out on the town so Nunnally can get some fresh air.)  
Nunnally: Thanks __big brother__ for taking me with you while you go shopping!  
Lelouch: No problem, Nunnally just wait right here while I go pick up some strawberries for you.  
Nunnally: Okay.  
(Lelouch walks away)  
(Meanwhile...)  
Random Terrorist #1: (Dressed in normal clothes) Man… I hate these clothes. I like my (cough) other outfit (cough) better.  
Random Terrorist #2: Yeah, but what was with those random girls giving out new uniforms?  
Random Terrorist #1: (Turns around to face Random Terrorist #2) No clue man, but- (Not looking where he's going, bumps into Nunnally.) What the?  
(The force of the impact causes her to roll down a hill…)  
Nunnally: Big brother, are you running somewhere?  
(Nunnally speeds down __the hill__)  
Lelouch: Nunnally I- Hey! Wh-where's Nunnally!? (Grabs Random Terrorist #1 by the shoulders) What did you do!?!  
Random Terrorist #1: Oh, you mean the girl in the wheelchair? I accidentally bumped her towards that hill…. (Points)  
Lelouch: And you didn't think to chase after her!?  
Random Terrorist #1: Well I…  
Lelouch: I don't have time for this!  
(Lelouch takes off down the hill to find Nunnally.)  
(He spots her halfway down the hill.)  
Lelouch: Nunnally!!  
Nunnally: Big brother?  
(Right as Lelouch almost catches her he sees two big men up in a skyscraper have just dropped a piano.)  
Lelouch: Nunnally! Watch out!  
Nunnally: Look out for what?  
(SPLAT!)  
Lelouch: (So terrified that his legs stop working mid-run and he trips over his own feet)  
(All the dust from where the piano dropped is clears.)  
Nunnally: Lelouch, are you alright?  
(Lelouch stands upright to find Nunnally safely at the __bottom of the hill__ with… Suzaku!)  
Suzaku: Lelouch, what's been going on? Just letting Nunnally go off by herself, you should know better than-  
Lelouch: I know, I know. Just… thanks…  
Suzaku: For what?  
Nunnally: I had fun today big brother, can we do this again soon?  
Lelouch: (Groans)_

_**Lloyd, Rakshata, and Schneizel go to a Bar**_

_(Takes place in the past!)__**  
**__Rakshata: Oh-hoho! Come along, boys! You'll enjoy this!  
Lloyd: Well, when in Rome!  
Schneizel: I could have sworn we were in Japan…  
(Later…)  
Rakshata: This is the best bar around!  
(All three enter the bar and sit down)  
(After a few drinks, guys surround Rakshata.)  
Rakshata: Hohoho! Of course, you can butter my toast anytime! (Talking to Random Drunk Guy #1.)  
Lloyd: (Talking to Schneizel) Well, this just isn't fair! How come she gets all the attention!?  
Schneizel: It must be how she only has one button on her shirt that's fastened. They're just waiting for it to fail.  
(After an hour or two…)  
Lloyd: I've had it! (Downs a drink) I want attention too!  
Schneizel: (In a booming voice) Me too! (He stands on his barstool, all fabulous.) __Ladies and gentlemen,__ I am… __Schneizel El Britannia__!  
(CRICKETS)  
Schneizel: … Long live Japan!  
(People flock to him)  
Group: OUR FEARLESS LEADER!  
Lloyd: (Slumps over the bar.) Oh sure, its always the lying prince or the drunk gal who get all of the attention!_

_**Rolo's Corner 1**_

(Student Council Meeting!)  
Rivalz: (Bursts through the door wearing his motorcycle helmet) Hey guys, guess what! I have awesome news!  
Lelouch: (Without looking up from his book) This can't be good…  
Shirley: What are you so excited about, Rivalz?  
Rivalz: I just got a new job!  
(Everyone freezes in shock)  
Suzaku: A job? Really?  
Rivalz: Why is it so hard to believe?  
Suzaku: Oh, well, no reason, I just…  
Milly: What kind of job is it?  
Rivalz: A delivery boy!  
Shirley: Delivery?  
Lelouch: But you can't do any heavy lifting.  
Rivalz: No, no, not Package Delivery!  
Voice from Nowhere: Pizza Delivery?  
Lelouch: (Throws something at the air duct and tries to act nonchalant)  
Milly: Did you guys hear something?  
Rivalz: I'm delivering Chinese Food! It's a great gig, man. I get to wear the fancy silk shirt with the funny symbols all over it, and I get to drive my own scooter as long as I put their decal on it!  
Shirley: Congratulations, then.  
Rivalz: There's just one thing…  
Suzaku: What?  
Rivalz: I just need someone to… wear this panda costume! (Pulls up a large panda costume)  
(The entire room becomes empty like a cartoon. Puffs of smoke remain where the people used to be. The swivel chair Lelouch was sitting in is spinning around rapidly.)  
Rivalz: (Sighs) Common, you guys! (Turns to leave and runs into Rolo)  
Rolo: Oh, uh… Where is everyone?  
Rivalz: (Grins) You're perfect! (Grabs Rolo by the arm and drags him off)  
Rolo: Wha-?  
(Later…)  
(Doorbell rings)  
Gino: (Opens the door) All right! (Calls back into the house) Hey, Anya! The Chinese is here!  
Rivalz: (Hands Gino some Take-Out boxes) Here's your order, sir! And also… (Pause) (He clears his throat expectantly)  
Rolo: (In the panda suit) Oh, right… (Slowly starts to do a dance)  
Gino: (Laughs) Aw, man! I'm going to order from this place again!  
Rolo: (Activates Geass) (He then takes Gino's food and dumps it on his head and kicks Rivalz in the groin while taking off the panda suit and walking away in his boxers) (Deactivates Geass)  
Gino: (Stops laughing) Hot, hot!!! Ahh!!  
Rivalz: (Falls into the fetal position, whimpering)  
Anya: (In the back of the room, holding up her mini-blog thing, she smirks at the video she just shot of Rolo) Recorded.

_**Antagonist Arthur**_ (Idea Credit: Adame-Senpai)

(Code Geass R1 Alternate Ending) (Suzaku and Lelouch go to the Britannian Consulate for the final showdown!)  
(They burst through the doors to the Emperor's Chambers to find V.V. and Charles… kneeling on either side of the throne like knights.)  
Suzaku: What the-?  
Arthur: (Sitting on the throne in a king's robe) Meow!  
Lelouch: Arthur? What?  
Suzaku: What's the meaning of this!?  
Arthur: Meow…  
Suzaku: What do you mean you planed all of this from the beginning?  
Arthur: Meooow!!  
Lelouch: What do you mean turning Suzaku and I against each other had been your plot from the start!?  
Arthur: Meow.  
Suzaku: And you had Lady Marianne killed and Britannia invade Japan for your plan?!  
Arthur: Meow, meow!!  
Lelouch: You say this is just the starting point??  
Suzaku: And you won't stop until you've reached entire World Annihilation?!  
Lelouch: And until the world accepts it's fate you'll continue using Charles as your public face!?  
Arthur: Meow…  
Lelouch: He's a mad man! A mad man!!  
Suzaku: Arthur. Please, answer my question.  
Arthur: Meow.  
Suzaku: You suppose? As if you're not obligated to it! Why did you use us!? Use Japan… the entire world! They're all just pawns in your sick game!  
Arthur: Meow, meow… Meow, meow-meow… Meow.  
Lelouch: All means necessary…?  
Suzaku: Arthur… I would expect this kind of thing from Lelouch… but not you…  
Arthur: Meow?  
Suzaku: (Pulls out a gun and aims it at Arthur) I won't let you manipulate the world to your pleasure!  
Arthur: MEOW!!  
(As Suzaku fires, Charles suddenly steps in and takes the bullet)  
Suzaku and Lelouch: (Recoil in horror)  
Arthur: Meow!  
Charles: As long as it's to fulfill the prophecy, your highness… This world… will fall… (Dies)  
Arthur: Meoooooooowwww!!!  
V.V.: (Says quiet farewells)  
Arthur: (Stalks towards Suzaku) Meow, meow, meow-meow-meow!  
Suzaku: What do you mean you can never forgive me? How could I ever forgive you! I gave you a place to live; I gave you food!  
Lelouch: He's mad, I tell you, mad!  
Arthur: Meow…  
Suzaku: Arthur!  
(Arthur pounces towards Suzaku to bite him, but when his teeth sink in, Suzaku jolts up in his bed.)  
Suzaku: (Takes a deep breath) Whoa… what a crazy dream… Hold on, how did we even understand what he was saying?

Owari!

xXx

**Author's Notes- **I apologize as well for the lack of updates, it's been one hell of a month. (Blizzards/Heat Waves, Jordan's SATs, Theatre Production, Birthday Party, Me getting sick for the first time in over a year… All on consecutive weekends.) You guys get the picture.

But seriously though, we try. Life can just be hectic. And if you guys are good little reviewers we tend to gain more initiative. Plus, this filler chapter helped us gather our bearings, so to speak, and we've got some more chapter ideas ready to be written! I have a new Suzaku x Everyone skit that I was going to add but I'll probably add it next chapter.

_**Author's Notes-**__ Sorry I don't have more to say but I'm having to text this stuff so I leave you with these few words: "Always butter someone's toast!"_

**The things I come up with,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter:** Undecided (Summary: There are many things to choose from…)


	20. Future Plot Holes

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Volvo… or Nyquil…**

**Author's Notes-** Jordan seems compelled to let the world know what kind of car I drive, but I'm not going to question it. Also, this chapter is extremely random, seriously. With more plot holes than Swiss cheese! Thanks to all of the people that gave us the initiative to write this chapter! (You know who you are)

Important Note!: Adame-Senpai pretty much wrote his own scene, I'm just typing it up from memory. And I kept my reaction to it the same as well.

_**Author's Notes**__- My life is now complete! Thanks to the almighty Ash, I now have a CHEESE-KUN! It was given to me on my birthday! Yay!! I may now die happily, but I will not: for the fanfic must go on!  
_

xXx

_(One day- ooh say around 3 in the afternoon- Suzaku is stalking around the Clubhouse as if he's a ninja.)  
__Lelouch__: (Walks up behind him) What are you doing?  
Suzaku: BWAH! My God, Lelouch you scared me.  
Lelouch: (Crosses his arms) I'm waiting for an answer.  
Suzaku: Well… Have you ever noticed that about once every week Jordan and Ashleigh disappear for a while?  
Lelouch: (Gets a happy-psychotic look) Ah yes, I like to call that my happy hour.  
Suzaku: … And you never wonder where they go?  
Lelouch: Nope.  
Suzaku: Well I do. So I'm trying to follow them.  
(Jordan and Ashleigh casually walk by as if nothing is going on and walk into a shed.)  
Suzaku: Come on! (He grabs Lelouch.)  
Lelouch: Hey wait!  
(Kallen and C.C. see Suzaku dragging Lelouch across the lawn and decide to follow.)  
C.C.: What's going on? (Grabs Lelouch's shoulder)  
Suzaku: Shh! They'll hear you.  
Kallen: They?  
(All four appear by the door of the shed to see another random door standing right in the middle of it.)  
(Jordan and Ashleigh walk through the door. The four other characters follow.)  
(They find themselves in a Rainbow Place that seems to be spinning!)  
Ashleigh: What the heck are you guys doing here!?  
Suzaku: You're keeping secrets, and I wanna know what they are!  
Jordan: But… but YOU CAN'T FOLLOW US!  
Kallen, Lelouch, Suzaku, C.C.: Why not?_

Ashleigh: Because this is the link to OUR world! It takes us to our universe!  
(The spinning starts to slow…)  
Kallen: And that's bad?  
Lelouch: I always assumed you two were from another dimension, but really.  
C.C.: (Staring at all the colours, reminiscent of C's World.)  
Suzaku: So if all it does it take us to a different universe, what's so horrible about it?  
Jordan: BECAUSE!  
Ashleigh: Because our world is strictly reality!  
Suzaku: … How strict…?  
Jordan: VERY strict. There aren't even any Knightmare Frames!  
Ashleigh: Or Britannia!  
Kallen: This world is starting to sound nice…  
(The spinning slows even more)  
Lelouch: How can all of these things effect us?  
Jordan: Well for starters… You might be…  
(The spinning stops)  
(Everyone is suddenly standing in pitch black)  
Jordan: (Screams)  
Ashleigh: Hold on, hold on! I'll get the lights!  
Jordan: Thank you…!  
(House lights up! Everyone's standing center stage in an auditorium.)  
(Suzaku, Lelouch, and Kallen have seemed to have reverted back to a younger age…)  
Jordan: (Stares) For starters… You might be…  
Ashleigh: Nine…  
C.C.: (Exactly the same) (Looks at the children standing around her and laughs)

_Jordan: Oh great, what are we gonna do now?  
Ashleigh: … Adame?  
Lelouch: Wait! My clothes don't fit!  
Kallen: Mine too, but I guess I could go naked. (Starts to undress)  
Jordan: Sorry Kallen, can't do that here. Too many pedophiles.  
Ashleigh: Yeah, you might not get raped in your world, but here you will.__  
Suzaku: I missed being this age... I was more flexible. (Does three spin-kicks across the stage)  
Jordan: Great, now how do we explain this to Gloria?  
Ashleigh: Lets just get them some clothes first…  
C.C.: I'm going to enjoy this.  
Lelouch: C.C., carry me!  
Suzaku: (Facepalm) Such a helpless child.  
(They arrive at Wal-Mart and buy clothes, but not without a few awkward glances from people.)  
(In Ashleigh's Volvo!)  
(Jordan is blowing bubbles out of the window while they come back and hit Lelouch in the face.)  
Lelouch: Can you stop that!? I am a prince of Britannia!  
Ashleigh: Sorry Lulu, Britannia doesn't exist here.  
C.C.: Literally.  
Kallen: Where are we going??  
Ashleigh: To Adame!  
Jordan: He'll have some kind of idea of what to do…_

(Cut to: Adame's House!)  
Adame: (Sitting in front of the TV, ironically watching a documentary on the bombing of Hiroshima.) Well, I do feel a bit sorry for what happened to that country… but at least Japanese Culture isn't being shoved down our throats.  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Burst in) Hi Adame-Senpai!  
Adame: And now we have a problem…  
Jordan: We thought we'd introduce you to our friends!  
Adame: I've already met them, haven't I?  
Ashleigh: We like to be thorough.  
Jordan: (Introduces everyone)  
Suzaku: What'cha watching on TV?  
Adame: (Scrambles to turn the TV off) Oh, nothing! So…  
Kallen: That looked like nuclear fallout…  
Adame: Uh, so, um… (Desperate to change the subject) So, you're the cape-kid huh? I've heard a bit about you.  
Lelouch: You have?  
Adame: Yes, with the blind and cripple sister right? Dude, have you ever glued doorknobs to the wall and watched what happens? It's hilarious!  
Everyone: WHAT!?  
Adame: (Holds up his hands defensively) Ah! Uhm… Magic Cards?  
Ashleigh: (Hits Adame)  
Adame: Ow, Ashleigh!  
Jordan: We're leaving now, bye!  
Suzaku: (Steps on Adame's foot as he leaves)  
Adame: You'll pay for this Sir Spins-A-Lot!!

_Jordan: (Slams the door of the Volvo) What a horrible person!!  
Ashleigh: Ugh, maybe Emily will have something to do…  
(TO EMILY'S HOUSE!)  
Emily: (Opens the door) Uhh…?  
Jordan: Emily, we'd like you to meet…  
(All the kids and C.C. come in the door)  
Ashleigh: Well, I don't think we need introductions anymore.  
(Emily just keeps staring)  
Lelouch: Is she alright?  
Jordan: There's no telling.  
Suzaku: (Waves a hand in front of her eyes)  
Ashleigh: (Yells) EMILY!!  
Emily: (Points to Kallen) HER BOOBS REALLY ARE BIGGER THAN MINE!  
Kallen: (Shocked) WHAT!?  
C.C.: (Sniffs the air) It smells of smoked ham in here…  
__Jordan: Emily, she's nine!!  
Ashleigh: And yet she speaks the truth.  
Kallen: Nine and a HALF! (Realizes what she just said) Uh, nevermind…  
Emily: (Walks over to Kallen and picks her up like a doll.) Mine.  
C.C.: Hmm... They do have the same color hair…  
Suzaku: Am I allowed to kick her too?  
Everyone: No!_

Kallen: (Squirms) Wait, where are you taking me??  
Emily: (Pats her head) So cute. (Whisks her away to another room of the maze-house)  
Everyone: (Watches them go…)  
Suzaku: So… what now?  
Ashleigh: I'm… not exactly… sure…  
C.C.: (Snickers) Seems like Kallen has now become a living doll.  
Jordan: What's she going to do, keep her in her pocket?  
Suzaku: Mmh… I'm bored now. Can we leave? It smells a little strange here…  
C.C.: The smoked ham scent?  
Ashleigh: We can't leave without Kallen, she doesn't belong in this universe…  
Lelouch: Ugh, so bothersome…  
Suzaku: You really don't care about anyone but yourself do you?  
Lelouch: Be quiet. You're so noisy.  
C.C.: … This seems…. Familiar…  
Suzaku: Don't tell me to be quiet, you selfish Britt!  
Jordan: (Bursts out laughing)  
Lelouch: So annoying. Why don't you use some of that spare energy outside!  
Suzaku: Do you want me to hit you?  
Ashleigh: I think… they're regressing…  
Jordan: Huh?  
Ashleigh: Regressing back to the age they've turned into…  
Jordan: Are you serious!?  
C.C.: Have a look for yourself.  
(When they turn their attention back to the children they see Suzaku sitting on top of a disgruntled and squirming Lelouch.)  
Lelouch: Get off of me you Neanderthal!  
Suzaku: (Grinning) Haha! No chance!  
Lelouch: Lousy jock…  
Suzaku: Don't blame me because you're weak.  
Emily: (From a few rooms away) OW! SHE BIT ME!  
Kallen: (Runs back in) Hahaha!  
Ashleigh and Jordan: This… could be a problem…

_Jordan: We have to get them back!  
(Jordan drags Suzaku, Ashleigh drags Lelouch and C.C. is forced to grab Kallen.)  
Emily: (Yelling out of the door) That's right you better run! I only like you for your hair and boobs!  
Ashleigh: Now what!?  
C.C.: Lets see, we're in the year 2009, correct?  
Lelouch: Well of course, we are nine years old.  
Suzaku: Hey! You should respect your elders!  
Kallen: Stupid boys…  
C.C.: Ok, I know where to go. Take a left here and a right at the next stop light.  
(After a few minutes they see a 'WELCOME TO CALIFORNIA' sign.)  
Jordan: How did we get here that fast!?  
Ashleigh: C.C.?  
C.C.: Oh look I found Rivalz as a child!  
(They all look out the window to see a cubby eight-year-old working on his big wheel.)  
Lelouch: C.C., where exactly are you taking us?  
C.C.: To see Lloyd.  
(At this time they pull up to a lavish five-story mansion that is obviously his parents' house.)  
(A young, almost teenage Lloyd steps out. His hair is shaggy and his lab coat is tie-dye colored.)  
Teen Lloyd: Well, well, C.C., it's been a while. And what do we have here?  
__Suzaku: Kururugi__ Suzaku, sir.  
Lelouch: __Lelouch Vi Britannia__.  
Kallen: Yeah, I'm Kouzuki Kallen.  
Ashleigh: We've already met.  
Jordan: SAME HERE! Oh great and mighty creator of the Lancelot!  
Lloyd: Lancelot… I like that name._

C.C.: You see Lloyd, we seem to have stepped into another dimension…  
Ashleigh: Speaking of which, how are you and Rivalz here?  
Lloyd: Don't you know? Minor characters exist in all possible realms!  
Ashleigh: Hmn… so… Aha, I have it!  
Suzaku: Have what?  
C.C.: Hold on just a second. Lloyd, you wouldn't happen to have any anti-aging cream, would you?  
Lloyd: (Laughs) You must be joking, C.C.!  
Jordan: Figures.  
Kallen: I'm BORED! Can we do something else!  
Ashleigh: No! We have to find some way to keep you guys from regressing until we can go back! Or you might be stuck like this forever!  
Suzaku: I don't think I'd mind too much…  
Kallen: But then I can't fly my Guren!!  
Ashleigh: Lloyd, would you have any idea where we might find…  
(BOOM!!)  
Lloyd: (Turns back into the house) What happened now!?!  
Rakshata: (Stumbles out with a layer of soot on her lab coat) (Cough) Oh, I told him it wouldn't work.  
Jordan: Told who?  
Schneizel: (Walks out, as dusty as Rakshata) It wouldn't have happened if she would've double-checked our calculations.  
Ashleigh: Just the guy I needed to see! The minor character Schneizel el Britannia!  
Suzaku: (Cocks his head to the side)  
Lelouch: (Tries to inconspicuously back away)  
Jordan: Why did you need to see Schneizel?  
Schneizel: I'm sorry, do I know you? You might be confusing me with someone else, for my last name is Rodriguez.  
Ashleigh: Ha, really? What's your middle name, Maurice?  
Schneizel: Why, yes. How did you know?  
Ashleigh: … That's not important right now. So… what exactly were you trying to do?  
Jordan: (Crosses her fingers) Build a giant robot, build a giant robot, build a giant robot…!!  
Rakshata: We're trying to create alternative fuel!  
Jordan: Dang it!!

_Ashleigh: Well, this is all wonderful information but we still have a little problem. (Points to Suzaku pulling at Lelouch's hair)  
Lloyd: I believe that pun was intended? (Bends down to Kallen's face)  
Kallen: (Snarls like a dog)  
Lloyd: Right, then Schneizel, I was wondering if your aging potion was ready yet?  
Schneizel: Well, it only lasts about an hour or two but… (Reaches in Rakshata's poof hair and pulls out a tiny little blue bottle) Here you go. (Hands it to C.C.)  
Rakshata: I do wish you would stop hiding things in there…  
C.C.: I forgot there was a hiding place in there. Maybe that's where my pizza from last week went.  
Ashleigh: (Drizzles the potion on them.) Okay, so we only have an hour lets get going!  
Jordan: (Being dragged away) But- but… my LANCELOT!  
Schneizel: Lancelot, huh? I like the sound of that…  
(In the Volvo!)  
Ashleigh: I say we go shopping and show them what reality is like.  
Suzaku: Lelouch went missing!  
Kallen: Tattle-tail!  
C.C.: I didn't even notice…  
Ashleigh: No one ever notices…!  
Jordan: Come on, let's go back and look for him…  
(Back in Lloyd's house)  
Suzaku: We lost Lelouch!  
Lloyd: Oh, its you again.  
C.C.: The scrawny boy with purple eyes. Where is he?  
Lloyd: Ah, I'm not sure, did you check Rakshata's hair?_

Jordan: (Searching the poof) Nope, not here!  
Kallen: (Pops out from under the couch) He's not here either!  
Suzaku: (Looks inside a cookie jar) No. (Opens a closet) No. (Runs outside and pops the trunk of the car) No…  
Ashleigh: This is like a game of 'Where's Waldo?' gone bad…  
Schneizel: We had better find him soon, lest the anti-aging potion kicks in.  
Kallen: Haha, that'd be funny!  
Jordan: Wait, what happens when it kicks in?  
Rakshata: My guess is he'll spontaneously return to his usual age.  
Suzaku: (Laughs) I want to see that!  
Ashleigh: Quick, Jordan, go get everyone's clothes out of the car so nothing explicit happens.  
Kallen: Aw, more clothes??  
Lloyd: You were the little girl in your kindergarten class that always pulled her dress over her head, weren't you?  
Schneizel: What age are we aiming for?  
Jordan: 18!  
Rakshata: Nine years? Schneizel dear, have you ever experimented with that much of an age gap?  
Schneizel: No I haven't.  
Lloyd: (Giggles) I hope there aren't any adverse affects!  
Jordan: (Comes back with an armful of clothes and throws them at the kids) Here you go! Now we need to find Lulu!  
Ashleigh: Spread and Search!  
(Meanwhile…)  
(The still chibi Lulu somehow managed to make his way back to the AudiGlorium.)  
Lelouch: (Mumbling to himself) Lets see… it was passed the lighthouse… then that Mount Rushmore monument…  
(Big Ben goes off) [Yeah, we're jumping continental boarders. You have no idea where we're coming from now, do you?]  
(He quickly runs to the lone door on the stage and goes through it. He ends up back in the shed outside the Ashford Clubhouse.)  
Lelouch: (Looks around) Good. Normalcy…  
(After getting used to the universal rules, he searches through the shed)  
Lelouch: (Pulls out a Zero costume) (Sighs) One of them must've put this in here… Oh well, it'll have to do…  
(Back with the search party…)  
Suzaku: (Pops out of a bush) Not here either!  
Kallen: (Walks out of the garage with some wire, a rubber duck, and an apple.) He's not in there.  
Lloyd: My, that boy has quite a knack for hiding!

_(After a few minutes… Chibi Zero- minus the mask- walks in.)  
Ashleigh: (Gasp) The cape!  
Jordan: Man… That thing shrunk.  
Lelouch: That's it! I, Lelouch Vi-__  
Ashleigh: (Picks up Chibi Zero like a doll.) Mine.  
Jordan: Well, at least it's not Emily this time…  
Ashleigh: We're going home! Now!  
(Everyone leaves)  
(They go past a couple of cacti, a __giant ball of yarn__…)  
Suzaku: Arthur would like that.  
(... A lake, a few trees… Oh look, a camel!)  
(Finally they get back to the AudiGlorium.)  
Ashleigh: (Tosses Lelouch through the door) Fix my cape, now!  
C.C.: Just when it starts to get interesting… (Walks through the door)  
Jordan: (Looks up) __Suzaku Kururugi__! Get off of the skywalk!  
Suzaku: Aw man!  
Kallen: (Huff) Boys…  
(They go through the door and all tumble to the ground at __Ashford__ as their 18 year old selves.)  
Rivalz: (Opens the door to the shed) Man, where have you guys been all day? Madame Prez has been looking for you!  
Kallen: Rivalz, did your mother ever send you to fat camp?  
Rivalz: What!? No I- ...I mean, umm...._

Jordan: (Laughing) That's so mean, Kallen!  
Ashleigh: And yet, you keep laughing.  
Lelouch: Forget about it, Rival. What does the Prez want?  
Rivalz: Well, she- hey, wait a minute. Why are you wearing-?  
Jordan: Don't worry about it, bye! (Slams the door)  
C.C.: That was awfully close.  
Ashleigh: Tell me about it… But wait, why hasn't Suzaku said anything?  
Suzaku: (With everyone staring at him) What? You think I don't know who Zero is? I've known for a while- I just don't care anymore!  
Kallen: Well, this is new…  
Lelouch: And awkward.  
Ashleigh: Argh, forget it! I can't take all of these plot holes anymore!  
Jordan: But I likey the plot holes…  
Ashleigh: No! We can't risk the universe falling apart again. These plot holes are so massive you could drive a Mack Truck through them!  
Kallen: Am I the only one who has no idea what they're talking about?  
Lelouch and Suzaku: (Shake their heads no)  
C.C.: (Not even paying attention. She decides to leave.)  
Jordan: But- but…  
Ashleigh: I know you want to use some of what we've done later, but there are some things even we can't get away with.  
Jordan: You mean like the rain in chapter-  
Ashleigh: (Covers Jordan's mouth) If they don't notice: It didn't happen!  
Suzaku: Would you two mind explaining what it is you're talking about!?  
Jordan: Not if we don't have to!  
Lelouch: Why wouldn't you have to?  
Ashleigh: Because of this!  
(Jordan and Ashleigh pull out two bottles of Nyquil and a panel with a red button on it)  
Kallen: No… No! Anything but that!  
Suzaku: And I thought Lelouch was cruel, but you two…  
Jordan: Hey, don't blame me, she came up with this system.  
Ashleigh: Because it's the most effective.  
Kallen: There has to be another way…  
Jordan: Not without Geass there isn't.  
Ashleigh: And neither of us can or want to do that, so…  
Jordan: Nighty-night!  
(After a short struggle- the three main characters black out. All of their memories of what happened are gone/warped beyond comprehension.)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Press the giant RESET button)

Owari!!

XxX

**Author's Notes- **I tried to fill in the plot holes the best I could but with Jordan poking holes every three seconds I pretty much ended up running with it. With summer sneaking up on us again, we'll have much more spare time for writing. Not to get anyone's hopes up, because I don't think we'll be updating once a day like we used to.

_**Author's Notes- **__E-mail me if you want to see my Cheese-Kun!_

**She almost cried when I gave that to her,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter:** Where's Lulu? (Summary: Yes, we noticed a long while ago that he disappears in almost every chapter for some entirely unexplored reason. Now we'll completely utilize our reoccurring plot device for all it's worth!)

Also…

**Suzaku x Everyone Extra!  
**_3)_ _Return of the Love-Chocolates_


	21. Where's Lulu?

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Punch Buggies… or Sonic… or Chik'Fil'A… or WalMart… or 30 Days of Night… or Sonic the Hedgehog… or Pizza Hut…**

**Author's Notes-** In case it wasn't obvious enough, Jordan and I decided to skip the month of June for our update in order to update on the anniversary of this story's publication onto FanFiction. And so, it's been an entire year with this. We've had too much fun writing and I'm hoping you guys have had too much fun reading whatever our warped minds spit out onto Microsoft Word. Thanks for sticking with us!

_**Author's Notes- **__Cheese-Kun is still alive!! And Happy Anniversary to us! Thanks to all the readers and reviewers. Specially the ones who contact us… I get bored easily. So, its summer which means lots of caffeine!! Randomness! Yay!!_

xXx

In the Punch Buggy…

Jordan: (Trying to drink an iced coffee whilst driving a straight drive.)  
Ashleigh: (Flipping through a book)  
Jordan: Hey, Ash, something's bugging me…  
Ashleigh: Hmn?  
Jordan: Have you noticed how lately Lulu has been… Uh…  
Ashleigh: Disappearing?  
Jordan: Well, I was going to say "poof-ing" but yes.  
Ashleigh: It has gotten more frequent than usual.  
Jordan: We know all of his secrets so where the hell could he be going??  
Ashleigh: Who knows? Maybe he has a complex.  
Jordan: Uh huh?  
(They arrive back at the Clubhouse!)  
Jordan: (Bursts in) We're back from Sonic!!  
Suzaku: (Walks into the room) Oh, that's where you went?  
Ashleigh: Yep. Say, Suzy-  
Suzaku: Stop calling me that.  
Ashleigh: Oh, right. Anyway, Suzy-  
Suzaku: (Cringes)  
Ashleigh: -we were wondering if you've noticed something about Lelouch.  
Suzaku: You mean how he keeps vanishing off of the face of the planet?  
Jordan: Exactly! You noticed too! Hasn't it been happening more often??  
Suzaku: I suppose you're right… I mean, I have my military duties so I have a reason, but he-  
Ashleigh: Precisely! That's why we need to stage an intervention.  
Jordan: Intervention?  
Suzaku: (Holds up his hands) He's probably just gambling. We don't need to-  
Ashleigh: All the more reason to have one! Don't you think so, Jordan?  
Jordan: If we do this, can I tie him up?  
Ashleigh: (Waves her hand at her, not really listening) Yeah, sure, whatever you want.  
Jordan: (Jumps) Score!  
Suzaku: Fine, fine… Whatever. So, where is he?  
Ashleigh and Jordan: (Look at Suzaku) You mean he's not with you?  
Suzaku: … I thought he was with you!  
Jordan: (Puts her face in her hands) Great!

_(Nunnally wheels in)  
Nunnally: What's going on in here?  
__Suzaku__: Nunnally, do you know where Lelouch is?  
Nunnally: No... __Big Brother__ just tells me he'll see me later tonight, and that he's going out.  
Ashleigh: So he doesn't even tell Nunnally, huh?  
Jordan: It's gonna be like some big Hide and Seek game, isn't it?  
Ashleigh: Exactly.  
Jordan: I'll call Rivalz…  
Suzaku: I'll inform the Prez…__  
Ashleigh: I'll get the Gurren Pilot…_

_(… After everyone is rounded up…)  
Milly: Alright! The name of the game is: Find Lelouch: Dead or Alive!  
Rivalz: Uh, Prez? I think we want him alive.__  
Milly: Right, well Rivalz and I will search the Gambling Casinos. Suzaku and Kallen, since you two are the toughest, you can search the streets!__  
Suzaku and Kallen: (Both thinking) Knightmares.  
Milly: Jordan and Ashleigh, you search all the local __hangouts__. Lets GO!  
(Everyone splits up)  
Jordan: Hey Ash?  
Ashleigh: Yeah?  
Jordan: What are the local hangouts?  
Ashleigh: I guess the places other students hang out.  
Jordan: So… Coffee Shops?  
Ashleigh: Let's go with that!_

_(Meanwhile…)_

_Kallen: How did we get stuck together?  
Suzaku: Don't ask me… Though this would be much easier if I could use the Lancelot…__  
Kallen: Yeah! And I could use my- …  
Suzaku: (Stares)  
Kallen: … Car!  
Suzaku: Right… I'm going to see if I can find Lloyd, so you'll be alright on your own?  
Kallen: Yeah, yeah, just go.__  
(Later…)  
Kallen: (Speeding down the street in the Gurren) Oh, yeah. This is much better.  
Suzaku: (In the Lancelot) Let's see… Where would Lelouch keep disappearing to? (Does a spin kick through a building)  
Kallen: SUZAKU!!!  
Suzaku: What!?_

(Meanwhile…)

(Milly and Rivalz enter a big, swanky casino downtown)  
Rivalz: Man, this place is massive!  
Milly: You're right. But I'm surprised you and Lelouch haven't been here before.  
Rivalz: Nah, they must've just built it.  
(Suddenly, a huge burly man in a suit walks up to Milly)  
Suit: (Looks Milly up and down) Mhm… I see. Listen, I'd like to ask you about… an occupation.  
Milly: Really?  
Suit: Yes, and I'm sure you'd be perfect for it. I have many people that work for me in this here casino, but I think I've got a position opening up. Whad'ya say?  
Milly: Well, it really sounds interesting…  
Rivalz: Hey, wait a minute! (Stands between Milly and Suit) Just what're you up to?  
Milly: Rival, what are you doing?  
Rivalz: Common, Prez! He's trying to make you one of those Bunny Waitresses! I've been in enough casinos to know these guys!  
Suit: I'd like you let you know that it's very dignified employment. All of my girls hold their heads high in life!  
Rivalz: Yeah, I bet it's not the only thing they hold-  
Milly: Rivalz, really! (Turns to Suit) Thanks, but no thanks. I'm still in school.  
Suit: Well that's too bad. (Reaches in his pocket and gives Milly a business card) But you know how to reach me if you change your mind.  
Rivalz: (After Suit walks away) Prez, you're not really going to be a Bunny Girl, are ya?  
Milly: Of course not. Not even if it was part of an elaborate plan to kidnap one of our friends and restore all of the important information that was wiped from their memory!  
Rivalz: Huh?

(Meanwhile…)

Kallen: (Sneezes)

(Meanwhile again…)

Jordan: (Walks out of another café) They haven't seen him either…  
Ashleigh: You know, Jordy, where we should check isn't the local hangouts.  
Jordan: Really. Since when does Lulu "hangout" anywhere!?  
Ashleigh: Exactly. We really need to look…  
Jordan: Oh! I got it! The Black Knights!  
Ashleigh: Precisely.

_(At the BK- no, not Burger King!!- Headquarters)  
Jordan: Hey Ash, you know how Batman had the Batcave, and Superman had that crystal-snow-cave thingy?  
Ashleigh: Yeah?  
Jordan: The Black Knights need something like that.  
Ashleigh: Cookie Cake Layer maybe? We'll look into it after we find Le… (Random Terrorist #1 walks by) ZERO!  
Random Terrorist #1: Zero? Have you seen him? Ohgi was trying to contact him.  
Jordan: Nope. He's playing Hide and Go Seek.  
Ohgi: Hide and Go Seek? What? At a time like this? By the way, who are you two?  
Ashleigh: … Zero's right hand women.  
Ohgi: Huh? I thought that was C.C. (Points to the green-haired girl staring up at a __Knightmare Frame__.)  
Jordan: C.C.! (Runs and tackles her)  
C.C.: What are you two doing here?  
Ashleigh: __Lelouch__ disappeared.  
C.C.: (Sighs) Again?  
Jordan: Exactly! We have everyone looking for him but he's nowhere to be found!  
Ashleigh: Any ideas?  
C.C.: Mmh… Did you check the Library?  
Ashleigh: Actually, we haven't checked any quiet places.  
Jordan: (Nods) That would probably be a good idea.__  
Ashleigh: (Grabs Jordan and starts walking out) Maybe a mattress shop....  
__  
(Meanwhile…)_

_Kallen: Damn allergies... Well he's nowhere on these rooftops…__  
Suzaku: (Does another spin kicks through a building.) Lelouch? Are you in there?  
__  
(To the others!)_

_Rivalz: Prez, we've been to five gambling hotels, and you have twenty business cards from those sleazy businessmen!  
Milly: Well it's not my fault.  
Rivalz: Maybe if you put on a sweater…  
Milly: And cover these assets!? Never! It's easier to get information about Lelouch's whereabouts this way._

Rivalz: You're only thinking of your friends.  
Milly: Of course! What if Lulu's in mortal danger? What ever would we do then??  
Rivalz: Common, Prez! Don't talk like that!  
Milly: He could be in the ghettos, at the mercy of some terrorist faction that loathes Britannians!  
Rivalz: Prez!  
Milly: And they'd kill him without any hesitation! Or worse, if they find out that he's actually a-  
Rivalz: (Shakes Milly) Prez cut it out! You're talking about our friend here!  
Milly: (Composes herself) Yes, you're right… I'm sorry. I just…  
Rivalz: It's okay. Lelouch can take care of himself.  
Milly: Of course, Rivalz. Now… (Suddenly chipper) Let's go find him! (Drags Rivalz down the sidewalk)

(Meanwhile… with Suzaku and Kallen…)

Kallen: (Muttering to herself) Who is he asking? The rubble!? (Over the Gurren's loudspeaker) Hey you! Stop destroying everything!  
Suzaku: Huh? I'm just trying to find someone!  
Kallen: So what? Is the settlement collateral damage?  
Suzaku: You're the Black Knight Ace, aren't you? What are you doing here?  
Kallen: I'm uh-… Looking for a lost comrade!  
Suzaku: Well… so am I! So just stay out of my way and I won't have to deal with you!  
Kallen: Is that supposed to be a threat? But whatever, I've got more important things to do!  
Suzaku: Like that comrade?  
Kallen: (Red-faced) Wha-? What did you say!?  
Suzaku: Oh, nothing. (Spinkicks though another building. A group of people stands in terror inside.) Don't mind me, I'm just looking for someone! … Not here either!  
Kallen: I should kill him for that…

(… With Jordan and Ashleigh…)

Jordan: (Walks into the Library) This place is huge!  
Ashleigh: (Looks around) A Labyrinth of Fiction!  
Jordan: Okay, we might loose each other in this place… So make sure you're cellphone is turned-  
Ashleigh: (Already gone)  
Jordan: - on… Darns it!  
Librarian: Shh!  
Jordan: (Whispers) Sorry!

_Jordan: Let's see here... If I were Lulu where would I be in a library? Of course! The Boring Section. (Looks around her at the two hundred-something book shelves) Great, now where is the Boring Section?  
(Off on her own, Ashleigh found a staircase.)  
Ashleigh: Looks interesting enough. (She climbs up to the top.)  
(At the top of the staircase is a bunch of books only with shiny covers!)  
Ashleigh: Hmm? I need to bring Jordan here…_

_(To Rivalz and Milly's story!)_

_Milly: Oh, that's it! I give up! We've been to a hundred of these places and still haven't found him!  
Rivalz: One hundred and twenty-three to be exact.  
Milly: I'm calling everyone and telling them to meet us somewhere. We'll think of a new plan._

_(Meanwhile...)_

_Kallen: (Phone goes off) Look, I don't have time to argue with you __Suzaku Kururugi__.  
Suzaku: (Phone buzzes) Well I'm glad to hear that because I have important business elsewhere. (Goes off his intercom thingy) Hello? Yes, ok Madame President. I'll call Jordan and Ashleigh._

_(To the Library!)_

_Ashleigh: Hmm, now I need to find Jordan…  
(A rock song starts playing really loud)  
Random Library Person: SHHHHH!!  
Jordan: Sorry! I forgot to turn down the volume!  
Ashleigh: (Yelling from the next storey) Jordan! Look up here!!  
Jordan: Oh hey Ash!  
Ashleigh: What!?  
Jordan: HEY!!!  
Ashleigh: Come up here and look at the shiny covers on these books!  
Jordan: SHINY!!!! (Runs up the stairs) Oh my Pretty Green Eyes! (Squeals)  
Everyone In the Library: SHHHHH!!  
Jordan and Ashleigh: Sorry…  
Ashleigh: Who called your phone by the way?  
Jordan: Oh yeah! Pretty Green Eyes!  
(They call him back)_

(Now outside the library)  
Jordan: Okay, Pretty Green Eyes! We're at the library right now but we'll be there soon! (Hangs up) Everyone's giving up and meeting at Chik'Fil'A to regroup!  
Ashleigh: (On her cellphone) Mhm, Chik'Fil'A, sounds good.  
Jordan: Who are you calling?  
Ashleigh: I'm calling Lelouch like any logical person would. We are searching the city for him, are we not?  
Jordan: (Falls over like she's in an anime!) Why didn't anyone else think of that!?  
Ashleigh: (Sighs and hangs up) Probably because they knew it was useless. He has his phone turned off like usual.  
Jordan: Oh, well. We tried. Now let's go! Jordan hungry!

(At Chik'Fil'A…)

Rivalz: (Slams his drink down) This is serious, guys!  
Jordan: (Eating)  
Ashleigh: (Drinking)  
Kallen: (Kicking Suzaku under the table)  
Suzaku: (Trying to figure out who keeps kicking him)  
Milly: (Just not paying attention)  
Rivalz: Guys! Focus!  
Milly: Just face it, Rival. When Lelouch doesn't want to be found, he makes sure he won't be!  
Ashleigh: All the better to spoil it for him.  
Jordan: (Nods) Here, here!  
Suzaku: True, but we've looked everywhere!  
Kallen: Yeah, I can't think of anywhere else to look!  
Rivalz: Maybe we should just go back to the Academy.  
Milly: After all of this wasted effort…  
Ashleigh: Wait, we haven't really looked everywhere.  
Suzaku: Everywhere that's worth looking.  
Ashleigh: But what we've done is look where we'd expect to find him… and Milly did say that when he didn't want to be found, he wouldn't be.  
Jordan: I get it! We look where we wouldn't think he'd be- because that's where he'd hide!  
Kallen: It makes sense. Knowing him he'd do something manipulative like that.  
Milly: I like it!  
Rivalz: Right, but where exactly are we looking now?  
Suzaku: Probably somewhere with a lot of people, like a mall, or even a restaurant.  
Ashleigh: Or WalMart!  
Kallen: What about somewhere completely deserted? Like a park or an abandoned building?  
Milly: Alright guys, we have a new plan! Let's all split up on our own this time so we'll cover more ground! Keep your phones handy for communication!  
Rivalz: Let's go!  
Jordan: Hold on! I haven't finished my sandwich!

_(After Jordan has eaten her meal and everyone looks around the city again…)  
Rivalz: Wait… Why are we back at __Ashford__!?  
Ashleigh: Because Lelouch told Nunnally he was "going out."  
Suzaku: So, he tricked us to think he was out while he's really hiding here somewhere?  
Jordan: Very good, __Pretty Green Eyes__!  
Milly: Great! Rivalz and I will check the classrooms and around campus. Suzaku and __Kallen,__ check the Gym, Auditorium, and offices. Ashleigh and Jordan, check the Clubhouse.  
(Both Jordan and Ashleigh salute her and run away)  
Milly: Right, come on Rivalz!_

(Suzaku and Kallen decide to check the Library first.)

Kallen: Jordan and Ashleigh already checked the Public Library, right?  
Suzaku: Yeah, and they didn't find anything.  
(They weave through a few bookcases before spotting three female students sitting at a table.)  
Suzaku: Why don't we ask them?  
Kallen: Worth a shot, I guess.  
Suzaku: (Walks up to them) Hi, by any chance, have any of you seen Lelouch around?  
Random Girl #1: (Whips her head around to face him) Lelouch is missing??  
Random Girls #2 and 3: Wha-!?  
Suzaku: Well, yes, sort of…  
Random Girl #3: Wait, you're Suzaku right?  
Suzaku: Yeah…  
Random Girl#2: (Looks at Random Girl #3) Who cares about that? Lulu is missing!  
Kallen: (Holds up her hands defensively) It's not like he's missing, really. It's just that we can't find him.  
Random Girl #1: Well, he hasn't been here. If he had-  
Random Girl #2: If he had we'd all be unconscious!  
Suzaku: … Huh?  
Kallen: (Thinking) Ugh…  
Random Girl #1: (Pulls out a handkerchief) If you manage to find him please tell us…  
Kallen: Yeah, right. Like we'd-  
Suzaku: You'll be the first to know.  
Random Girl #3: (Staring at Suzaku) Thank you so much. That's so nice of you.  
Random Girls #1 and 2: (Look at Random Girl #3 like she's insane)  
Suzaku: (Starts feeling uncomfortable) Uh… Sure… Right! I- ah…  
Kallen: (Drags Suzaku out of the Library) We'll be leaving now!

(Later…)

_(Jordan and Ashleigh are out looking in the garden near the Clubhouse.)  
Random Girl #2: Hey, look over there. (Points to Jordan and Ash)  
Random Girl #1: Aren't they the ones who are always following __Lelouch__ and Suzaku around?  
Random Girl #3: Following? My Suzaku!?  
Random Girls #1 and 2: My??  
Random Girl #3: I mean umm... Hey! You girls in the garden!  
Ashleigh: Are they talking to us?  
Jordan: One way to find out. (Yells back) What!?  
Random Girl #1: (Walks over) We heard Lelouch went missing.  
Ashleigh: Very good. You're up to date on your gossiping skills.  
Jordan: (Nods)  
Random Girl #2: Well if you do find him be sure to tell us first.  
Jordan: Why would we do-?  
Ashleigh: (Elbows her in the side) We'll tell you first… if you do us a favor.  
Random Girl #1: And that would be?  
(Ashleigh walks over and whispers something in her ear.)  
Random Girl #1: … Deal.__  
Jordan: (Trying to distract them) Hey, there goes Pretty Green Eyes!  
Random Girl #2: Who?  
Ashleigh: Suzaku.  
Random Girl #3: Where!? (Runs around the corner)  
(The other Random Girls follow)  
Jordan: Ash, we're not really going to tell them are we?  
Ashleigh: Of course not._

Jordan: Good. I thought you were serious for a second.  
Ashleigh: Well, you know what they say: If you say "gullible" really slowly, it sounds like 'green beans'.  
Jordan: Really? (Pauses)  
Ashleigh: Well?  
Jordan: … Hey, that's not funny!

(Meanwhile…)

(Milly and Rivalz walk down the hallway of the school building)  
Rivalz: Prez, I don't think I can do much more walking…  
Milly: Oh, common Rival! Stick it out! Exercise is good for you!  
(A random teacher suddenly walks out of a classroom ahead of them)  
Rivalz: Hey! (Runs up to the teacher) Hi Sir, I was just wondering if you've seen Lelouch around.  
Random Teacher: (Glances at his clipboard) No, I don't think so. (Flips through some papers) He had a remedial class today, but as per usual didn't show up… and neither did you, Mr. Cardemonde. (Points at Rivalz with his pen)  
Rivalz: Ah, hey! Look at the time! I've gotta run, see you in class! (Runs back to Milly) Man, that was close…  
Milly: It's all the class you two miss, I swear.  
(They continue down the hall)  
Random Girl #3: (Suddenly rounds the corner at the end of the hall) Hey! She lied! Suzaku's not here at all!  
Random Girls #1 and 2: (Come up behind her, panting) Well, of course he's not… We just saw him on the other side of the school…  
Milly: Do you three need something?  
Random Girl #2: Oh, don't mind us!  
Random Girl #1: You two wouldn't happen to be looking for Lelouch too, would you?  
Rivalz: How do you guys know about it?  
Random Girl #2: From the wind… (She receives a few looks) … I mean, four other people are looking for him all over the school.  
Milly: You must've run into the other search parties.  
Random Girl #1: Yes, so if you guys find him, don't forget to tell us first!  
Rivalz: Why do we have to tell you when we find him?  
Random Girl #3: Because Suzaku promised us that he would.  
Random Girl #2: And the other parties have already agreed to it.  
Milly: They have?  
Random Girl #1: Yes, so you're obligated to it!  
Milly: Really… Hey, look, it's Suzaku! (Points)  
Random Girl #3: Where!? (Runs off)  
Random Girls #1 and 2: (Sigh and follow)  
Rivalz: Man… Madame Prez, why don't I have a legion of fangirls that want to know my every move?  
Milly: (Laughs and pats him on the back) Oh, Rival! That's because you're a loser!  
Rivalz: (Slumps his shoulders) Too honest, Prez… Too honest.

_(Meanwhile…)_

_Jordan: That's it! I give up!  
Ashleigh: What about your dream of tying him up?  
Jordan: I'm way too lazy for this.  
__Milly: (Walks up, sighing) I'm guessing you didn't find him either?  
Jordan: Nope.  
Kallen: (Walks around the corner with Suzaku) Neither did we…  
Rivalz: Now what?  
(…Silence…)  
Ashleigh: Hey Pretty Green Eyes… What are you staring at?__  
Suzaku: Huh? (Looks back at Ash) Oh, I just thought I saw something in that window there. (Points)  
Rivalz: Hey, isn't that window…  
Milly: You don't think?  
Jordan: He wouldn't!!  
Kallen: He would.  
Ashleigh: (Laughs hysterically) Of course!  
(They all run into the clubhouse and to Lelouch's room.)  
(They open the door to see Lelouch opening said window, probably thinking of slipping out.)  
Milly: Hold it right there!!  
(Kallen and Suzaku run and grab each of his arms.)  
Lelouch: Damn.  
Jordan: You were in here sleeping the whole time weren't you!?  
Lelouch: And reading.  
Ashleigh: Don't give her a smart-ass remark. (Hit's him in the side.)  
Lelouch: Hey! What was that for?!  
Ashleigh: For tricking us!__  
Rivalz: Really, Lelouch. You even lied to Nunnally.  
Nunnally: (Suddenly right outside the door) Not really. (Giggles) Brother told me to tell all of you that. I'm sorry for lying to you.__  
Lelouch: You did well, Nunnally.  
Suzaku: Even Nunnally was in on this!?  
Ashleigh: You owe me a whole day of my life back!  
Jordan: So every time you disappear you come up to your room?  
Lelouch: Pretty much.  
__Milly: Such a blunt answer... Come on downstairs, guys… I need celebratory tea.__  
Kallen: What are we celebrating?  
Milly: Because we achieved our goal! Finding Lelouch: Dead or Alive!  
Lelouch: Dead or Alive!?  
(Everyone heads downstairs except for Ashleigh, who had to make a phone call to the Random Girls)  
(After a while Ash comes downstairs while everyone's enjoying their drinks.)  
Jordan: (Sipping coffee) So Ashleigh…  
Ashleigh: Hum?  
Jordan: What exactly did you tell those three girls to do?_

Ashleigh: Oh… nothing…  
Suzaku: What three girls?  
Jordan: The Lulu Fangirls!  
Lelouch: (Coughs) What!?  
Kallen: (Waves a spoon at Jordan) Yeah! I know who you're talking about.  
Milly: Well, there was that one that was infatuated with Suzaku.  
Suzaku: (Tries to sink into his chair) Could we please move on to another topic…  
Rivalz: Common, man. At least you have fangirls!  
Jordan: But Ash made a deal with them and I want to know what it was!  
Ashleigh: (Evil smile) Oh, you know… I figured that I should get something out of this adventure too.  
Jordan: That doesn't answer my question!  
Ashleigh: You'll just have to wait.  
Kallen: Wait for what exactly?  
Ashleigh: For entertainment.  
Rivalz: That doesn't sound good.  
Jordan: Oh, forget it. I'll find out eventually.  
Ashleigh: Right. And speaking of things that don't sound good: I need to call Shirley. Just a minute! (Leaves)  
Milly: What could Shirley possibly have to do with this?  
Kallen: (Shrugs)

(Later that night… at some random harbor…)

Random Girl #2: Ugh, where is she? And why do we have to be in this dump!  
Random Girl #1: (Looks at her watch) She's a little late… Are you sure this is the right place?  
Random Girl #3: (Holds up a slip of paper) It's the right place. This is where she told us to meet her…  
Random Girl #2: Well, she needs to hold up her end of the deal!  
(Thud)  
Random Girl #3: (Screams) What was that!? What was that!?  
Random Girl #1: Who's there??  
(Shirley walks out of the darkness)  
Random Girl #2: Oh, it's just you… Say, aren't you part of the student council?  
Shirley: Yes, I am, but… (Turns around) Is this really alright?  
(The Random Girls hear nothing but Shirley reacts as if she's heard a response.)  
Shirley: Well, alright then…  
Random Girl #3: What are you up to…?  
Shirley: Don't worry. (Grabs Random Girl #3's wrist) It'll only hurt for a moment.  
Random Girl #1: You're weird… Sounding like a rapist…  
Shirley: (Suddenly bites into Random Girl #3's wrist)  
Random Girls #1 and 2: (Scream)  
(As Random Girl #3 falls to the ground Shirley lunges after Random Girl #2 with a crazy look in her eyes.)

(Meanwhile…)

Jordan and Ashleigh: (Munch on popcorn on top of a storage container)  
Ashleigh: Oh! That was nice! Right to the jugular!  
Jordan: Thank you for this.  
Kallen: (Covers her eyes) This is worse than 30 Days of Night!  
Jordan: Too bad we can't tell anyone else about this…  
Lelouch: How did you manage to lure them down here, anyway?  
Ashleigh: I promised them your cellphone number, of course.  
Lelouch: You what!?  
Ashleigh: Don't worry. They're obviously not going to call anyone anymore.  
Kallen: You do have a point… (Cringes) Oh, Shirley, at least kill her swiftly!  
Jordan: (Laughs)

_Ashleigh: Ah, why do I get such satisfaction out of this?  
Kallen: Probably because your such a devious person.  
Jordan: Hey, I'd take that as a compliment.  
Lelouch: Come on, it's pretty late. Let's get back.  
Shirley: (Calling from below) But… What about the bodies?  
Lelouch: I'll have Tamaki take care of it.  
(Tamaki walks up and Lelouch slips on his Zero helmet fast.)  
Tamaki: WHAT!? I don't wanna touch those bodies! Come on Zero, I thought we were __best buds!__  
Zero: Tamaki. What did I tell you your official title in the Black Knights was?  
Tamaki: … Interior Custodial Minister…  
Zero: Right. Now dispose of the bodies! (Dramatic hand motion)  
Tamaki: Man…! (Wanders off)  
Kallen: (Snickers)  
Jordan: (Rolling on the ground from laughing)  
Ashleigh: (Holding her side from the pain of laughter) Oh Suzaku... Thank you for that Lulu. Remind me later that I owe you a free one.  
Lelouch: A free what?  
Ashleigh: One of these! (She runs and grabs the cape right off his back and runs for it.)  
Lelouch: Hey! (Runs after her)  
Jordan: That reminds me…_

_(The next day… Back at Clubhouse…)_

_Suzaku: (Reading a magazine on the couch) Hey Ashleigh, where did Jordan go?  
Ashleigh: (Playing Sonic the Hedgehog on the computer she stole from Adame-Senpai in the Zero Cape she stole from Lulu.) Check your pockets.  
Suzaku: What? (Reaches into his pockets) Hey! Where is-?! (Stands up) The __Lancelot__!  
Lelouch: (Sipping tea) You should have known better.  
Jordan: (In the Lancelot) (Taps on the clubhouse roof) I bet you can't catch me, __Pretty Green Eyes__!  
Suzaku: Oh yeah?! (Runs out and after her… and manages to keep up with the Lancelot.)  
Lelouch: Now then, Ashleigh if you would please hand over the cape. (Holds his hand out)  
Ashleigh: Yeah, right. (Jumps up and runs for it again)  
Lelouch: You'll pay for this! (Grabs random object. -Let's call it a bat-)  
(After a while of chasing they all collapse in the middle of the courtyard from exhaustion.)  
Suzaku: Hey, doesn't this feel familiar?  
Jordan: Just a little…  
Ashleigh: Wait a minute, what's today?  
Lelouch: The __fifth of July__. Why?  
Jordan: Oh Suzaku! We've been here for one whole year!  
Suzaku: Has it really been a year?  
Lelouch: So it seems.  
Ashleigh: Wow, a year with the cape.  
Suzaku: Lots of memories...  
__Jordan: And plenty more to come. Come on Suzy! I'm taking the Lancelot to Pizza Hut! C.C.!  
Suzaku: I told you not to call me that!  
(The Green Haired Witch pops up and climbs into the Lancelot along with the other two.)  
Ashleigh: (Takes a deep breath) Ah, here we go again! (Runs into the Clubhouse)  
Lelocuh: (Running after) Give me back the cape!!_

Owari!!

XxX

**Author's Notes-** I hope no one has forgotten about Shirley's situation… If you have, then I suggest looking at Chapter Seven. (Even just the title.) So, this is our One-Year Post! It's a pretty lengthy chapter at that.

_**Author's Notes-**__ I had fun writing the end… So many memories. I want cookie cake now... Anyways, here's to one more year of Britannia Did it! … And now I want tacos._

**Can we really keep this up for another year, I wonder, I wonder?,**

_**-Destiny**_

**As Promised: Suzaku x Everyone Extra!  
**Episode 3(?): Return of the Love Chocolates!

(One day in the Clubhouse…)  
Suzaku: (Wandering around, bored) Man, I have nothing to do today. (He goes upstairs) But no one's around!  
(He paces around a few times…)  
Suzaku: That's it. (Heads towards a closet) Maybe I can find a deck of cards or a board game or a football or… something!  
(He opens the hallway closet and a wave of miscellaneous crap topples over him)  
Suzaku: (Squirms out from under the pile) Sheesh, you think with all the space here, they'd have a tidy closet! (Spots something) Hmn? What's this?  
(He holds up a tiny red box. The contents rattle when he shakes it.)  
Suzaku: (Opens the box) Whoa! Why is there a box of chocolates in a place like this? Though I feel like I've seen this box somewhere before…  
(Throwing caution to the wind: he decides to eat a piece of the chocolate.)  
Suzaku: Hey, this isn't that bad. I wonder why they were in the closet? (Pops another piece) I'm starting to feel a bit lightheaded, though…  
(He puts the box down and stumbles down the hallway, opening the first door he comes to, he peers inside.)  
Suzaku: Is there someone in here? (Catches sight of something and hoods his eyes) Hmn… (He slowly slips inside…)

(Later…)

(Everyone returns to the clubhouse and they're now searching for Suzaku.)  
Jordan: No, no! I've checked that room already.  
Ashleigh: He's got to be in here, I promise.  
Lelouch: (Talking to Jordan) Are you sure? I don't remember checking there.  
Jordan: Yes! Listen to me!  
Lelouch: Why on earth would I do that?  
Ashleigh: Hey! Listen to **me** okay!?  
Jordan: (Whips around) Hai!  
Nunnally: Have you found Suzaku yet?  
Lelouch: Not yet, Nunnally. But we think we're close.  
Ashleigh: Think? Bah, we know! I'm telling you he's right- (She reaches for the door) In- (She opens the door) Here!  
(The door opens to reveal… Suzaku pressing the side of his face onto a full-length mirror that's mounted on the wall.)  
Suzaku: (Mumbling) No, **you** have the greenest eyes! (Chuckle)  
(The sound of someone clearing their throat)  
Suzaku: (Freezes and turns to the door)  
Jordan: (Staring with her eyes wide open)  
Lelouch: (Blinks)  
Ashleigh: (Narrows her eyes) Suzaku… I'm afraid to ask, but… What exactly is it you're doing?  
Jordan: (Still staring) A mirror, obviously!  
Suzaku: … It's not what you think! (Suddenly runs out of the room)  
Lelouch: … and now that image is forever burned into my retinas.  
Jordan: (Smacks her forehead a few times) Forget! Forget! Forget!  
Ashleigh: And the winner of the Most Disturbing Award goes to…!  
Nunnally: Would someone mind explaining it to me? Did something happen?  
Ashleigh: Suzaku was about to run it up the mango tree.  
Jordan: (Shrieks a little)  
Nunnally: Huh? What do you mean? What mango tree?  
Lelouch: It's nothing, Nunnally. Don't worry about it. Just… forget it.  
Jordan: I wish I could.

END

**A/N-** And that's all I have. It turned out a bit longer than I anticipated but what can you do? (For the record: Hai equals Yes.)  
Suzaku x Himself. Hmn? How many saw it coming?

**Until next update! Reviews are greatly appreciated! Sometimes the reviews make us laugh. Time for a little role-reversal!**


	22. Halloween Spectacular

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Soulja Boy… or Superman… or Skittles (Again)… or Danny Phantom…**

**Author's Notes- **I realize how long it's been and I do feel bad about it, but for once it isn't my fault! But anyway, if we can get away with a Christmas Chapter in July then we can get away with a Halloween Chapter in August. So… deal.

_**Author's Notes- **__Okay, sorry for the late update… This time it was my fault. My laziness has almost reached a new level…._

xXx

_Lelouch: (Standing near an abandoned building in the Ashford Schoolyard.) Come on, Suzaku… Where is he? (Looks at his watch) I'm gonna be la-  
(A ghostly white hand suddenly reaches out and covers his mouth and pulls him behind the abandon building.)  
(Lelouch looks up to see what looks like the ghost of an old samurai.)  
Lelouch: (Girlish Scream)  
Samurai Ghost: (Laughing) I really scared you, huh!?  
Lelouch: … Suzaku?  
Suzaku: (Removes the mask) I figured if I could scare you. I'd be able to scare Ash and Jordan.  
Lelouch: (Taking the mask into his hands) Where did you even get this?  
Suzaku: The Halloween store downtown.  
Lelouch: There's a store dedicated to Halloween?  
Suzaku: Yeah, it opens up every year around __Halloween__.  
Lelouch: It's almost Halloween?  
Suzaku: Oh me! You forgot? (Grabs his wrist) Come on, we've got to get you a costume!  
Lelouch: Suzaku! I, Uh- …already have a costume!  
Suzaku: (Stops. Thinks. Ponders. Gets an idea.) Oh right! The Zero thing? Man, you've been planning this for a long time.  
Lelouch: You have no idea._

Later…

(The two of them return to the Clubhouse at dusk.)  
Lelouch: You know the plan, right?  
Suzaku: (Fixing his costume) I'll be waiting at the rear. (He walks around the Clubhouse.)  
(Lelouch walks through the front door of the building to just C.C. standing there)  
Lelouch: C.C! What are you doing? What would you have done if someone besides me had opened the door?  
C.C.: I'd let you handle it.  
Lelouch: Of course you would've… Anyway, where are the other two?  
C.C.: (Shrugs) I haven't seen them.  
Lelouch: Did they leave?  
C.C.: (Shrugs again) I haven't heard anything.  
Lelouch: You're a lot of help.

Meanwhile…

(The two girls are in the older rooms of the Clubhouse.)  
Ashleigh: You know the plan, right?  
Jordan: (Fixing her costume) I'll be waiting in the kitchen. (She starts to walk out of the room)  
Ashleigh: Remember to make sure you're not seen by anyone- except maybe C.C… It's not like she'll tip anyone off.  
Jordan: Right! Oh, you're wig's crooked… (Fixes Ashleigh's wig)  
(They silently head downstairs)

_Suzaku: (Holds walkie-talkie up to his mouth.) Hey Lelouch, any sign of them?  
Lelouch: (With his walkie-talkie) No, not yet…  
(Somewhere else…)  
Jordan: (Walking around a corner with her cell phone in hand.) Man, where are they!?  
Ashleigh: (Walking around a different corner her with cell phone also in hand.) No clue; just keep quiet.  
(As all of this is going on they don't realize that Suzaku and Jordan are walking around the same corner in different directions. The same goes for Ash and Lelouch.)  
Suzaku: (Freezes) WHAT THE-!?  
Jordan: GHOST!!!  
Lelouch: (Screams)  
Ashleigh: What a loser.  
Jordan: Ashleigh!!! (Runs around the next two corners and bumps into Lelouch.)  
Lelouch: (Turns around to see Jordan laying on the floor and screams... again.)  
Suzaku: (Walks closer)  
Jordan: (Jumps up and clings to Ashleigh.)  
Ashleigh: Jordan, its just Suzaku.  
Suzaku: You can tell?  
Ashleigh: Just a little obvious there, Suzy.  
Lelouch: (Bends down to get a better look at Ashleigh's costume.) What's the meaning of this? Why are you dressed exactly like me!?  
Jordan: If you see your doppelganger then you'll die!  
Suzaku: So… you're planning to kill us? And why did Jordan have to dress up like me!?  
Ashleigh: Because you two are the closest in personality, and she wanted to wear the white Lancelot Suit.  
Jordan: It's very comfortable. (Does some ballet moves)  
Lelouch: And the killing us part?  
Ashleigh: Well, we weren't really planning on killing you... More like scaring you into thinking your death was fast approaching.  
Suzaku: (Picks Jordan's wig off of the floor) This thing is pretty realistic…  
C.C.: (Walks in, eating pizza.) Interesting… but I don't think I can handle two Lelouch 's.  
Suzaku: C.C., are you not scared of my costume either?  
Lelouch: Of course not. The only thing that would scare her is if we ran out of pizza.  
C.C.: (Gets an evil look on her face) Don't even say such a thing.  
Jordan: Wait, we have pizza? (Runs down stairs)_

Ashleigh: (Following) Jordan, we ALWAYS have pizza.  
Lelouch: Wait! (Plucks the wig off of her head) Take off that ridiculous costume first!  
(When everyone comes down into the kitchen, Milly suddenly jumps out wearing the cat costume she wore for the Cat Festival.)  
Milly: Happy Halloween everyone!  
Suzaku: (Still wearing his costume, jumps)  
Jordan: But it's not Halloween yet.  
Rivalz: (Walks in carrying a box of decorations) Yeah, but that won't stop the Pres!  
Milly: Right! Halloween is this weekend, so we have a lot of planning to do!  
Lelouch: Planning for what, exactly?  
Milly: Why, the Halloween Party of course!  
Ashleigh: Good, now I don't have to throw one.  
Jordan: But… It will be a costume party, right?  
Rivalz: Well, yeah.  
Jordan: Pimpin'!  
Ashleigh: Did you just say-?  
Rivalz: Hey, by the way, why are you two wearing-?  
Suzaku: It's a long story.  
Lelouch: And not a very interesting one.  
Milly: Anywho, we need to plan a big event for this party. Any suggestions?  
Lelouch: As long as it doesn't include the Cross-Dressing Festival. I'm completely against that.  
Suzaku: (Slowly lowers his hand) Damn, you just ruined my idea.  
Rivalz: How about a costume contest?  
Milly: Yes, I like the sound of that… but everyone's costume will be different, right? How are we supposed to grade that?  
Ashleigh: We can have everyone dress as the same thing. For the contest at least.  
Jordan: Oh! Oh! Let's dress up like the Lancelot!  
Rivalz: I think you and Suzaku have a bit of an edge on that…  
Lelouch: Besides, you don't dress up as a Knightmare for Halloween.  
Suzaku: Mmh, too many clichés.  
Jordan: Uhm… Let's dress up like Zero!  
Lelouch: What?  
Milly: Hey! I kind of like that idea! That outfit is very detailed, and will be pretty hard to recreate…  
Suzaku: Are you sure we should be dressing up as a terrorist?

_Ashleigh: Oh, don't be such a stick in the mud, Pretty Green Eyes!  
Milly: Alright! Let's spread the word!  
Jordan: Milly, I think if we do this, maybe we should just keep it inside the council.  
__Lelouch__: For once I agree with her.  
Milly: (All sad now) Fine… I'll just tell the council then…_

_That weekend…_

_Jordan: Why do we have to be the judges? I wanted to participate in the contest too!  
Ashleigh: Because I have a plan. Just go along with what I say.  
Jordan: Okay.  
Ashleigh: (Bust through the student council room doors.) Everyone line up!  
(Several Zeros scatter and fall into place.)  
Jordan: Ash, I can't tell who's who... Well, except Arthur.  
Arthur: (In his little Zero cape) Meow!  
Ashleigh: That's the point, so we don't play favorites.  
Jordan: Awww! Who's a cute kitty!? (Picks up Arthur and pets him) Can he win?  
Ashleigh: No! Hmm… We might need some help deciding…_

Jordan: I know! Everyone- (Dramatic arm movement) Pose!  
(The many Zeros look at one another confusedly before striking a pose. Only a few pose like the actual Zero. Most are in ridiculous positions like Disco, famous statues, and one even started the Soulja Boy before getting hit.)  
Ashleigh: Okay, let's see now…. Normal positions please. (They comply) Well, these three obviously have boobs.  
Jordan: (Facepalm) That's not supposed to matter! It's the costume that matters!  
Ashleigh: Yeah, I know. I can tell which one's Nunnally but I wasn't going to take points away for what she can't help.  
Jordan: (Nods) Yes, and her outfit is extremely well made.  
Zero in Chair: Thank you! Sayoko really did most of the work on it, since I can't see what Zero's costume looks like.  
Ashleigh: Hmn… This one doesn't have a collar. You fail.  
Jordan: Sheesh Ash, aren't you being a little brutal?  
Ashleigh: There's no collar, Jordan. No! Collar!  
Jordan: Alright, alright! (Examines the Zeroes) Hey, isn't there one more person than there should be?  
(The Zeroes look at each other again. Everyone's eventually staring at the one trying to figure out how to eat pizza through the mask.)  
Jordan: C.C.!  
Zero with Pizza: What? Oh- I mean: (Very, very bad impersonation of Lelouch) What do you want!?  
Ashleigh: Just forget it, Jordan. It's not a big deal.  
Jordan: But- but… She's hiding that glorious hair!  
Ashleigh: Yeah… I need to examine the capes. You! (Points to random Zero) Swing your arm out like this: (Flails her arm into a pose)  
Random Zero #1: (Pause) (Flails his/her arm into a pose)  
Random Zero #2: (It becomes obvious that this one is Kallen) (Another bad Zero impersonation, with fitting hand movements) C.C! Your meddling is getting in the way! What have I told you about that fixation on pizza!?  
Zero with Pizza: Oh, come off it you imposter.  
Jordan: Okay… I think this has gone on long enough…  
Ashleigh: You're right. Which one do you think captured Zero's image the best?  
Jordan: Arthur, of course.  
Ashleigh Seriously.  
Jordan: (Sigh) Fiiiine!

_Ashleigh: I say the second one from the left wins. Check out the angles on that cape! What about you Jordan?  
Jordan: Yeah, sure why not? It's all the right colors.  
Rivalz: (Takes off his helmet) Yes!! I win!  
Lelouch: (Takes off the helmet too) What!? How is that possible? Mine is- … so realistic!  
__Ashleigh: Exactly. It's too good. Too much detail. You're bombarding us!  
Rivalz: You took this waaay too seriously, man.  
Suzaku: (Playing with his cape collar, then randomly does a spin kick to see what the cape would do.) Come on Lelouch, be a good sport.  
Shirley: Can I change into my real costume now?  
Nina: What are you dressing as Shirley?  
Shirley: I'm dressing as a vampire!  
Jordan: Ha. Who says she's just dressing?  
__Ashleigh: (Jabs Jordan in the stomach with her elbow.)  
Nina: What do you mean by-  
__Lelouch__: So everyone is getting into their actual costumes?__  
Milly: Yep! What is everyone dressing as this year? Lulu?  
Lelouch: … This is my costume.  
Ashleigh: Ha, I'm going to be Danny Phantom! Though I suppose it's really Dani Phantom…  
Suzaku: (A little too excited) I'm dressing as a samurai!  
Rivalz: I was thinking about being Superman! Then I can rescue a __damsel in distress__. (Winks at Milly, but of course she's oblivious.)  
Nina: I'm just wearing a schoolgirl outfit… I wanted to be Princess Euphemia but I couldn't get enough money together…  
Jordan: (Mutters) That and I would've had to hit you in the face with a car… (Louder) I want to be a Skittle Princess!  
Lelouch: Should have seen that one coming.  
C.C.: I'm going to be a witch, of course.  
Ashleigh: That one too.__  
Kallen: I found a nurse costume from sometime ago. I guess I'll wear that.  
Nunnally: Sayoko and I put together a fairy costume.  
Suzaku: What about you Milly?  
Milly: I'm just going to wear my prince costume from the Cross-Dressing Festival again!  
(After they all get dressed, they go walking around the academy.)  
Jordan: Ashleigh!! (Practically has a heart attack)  
Ashleigh: What!?  
Jordan: Did… Did… Did you see the guy dressed up as the Lancelot!?!  
Suzaku: Really? Where?  
Kallen: Tell me when you see a Gurren impersonator. Then I'll be interested.  
C.C.: Well I don't see a Gurren impersonator, but I do see someone dressed suspiciously like Kallen... or perhaps someone that looks like her?__  
Rivalz: Hey, there's another Zero costume!  
(They all look to see the Zero and Kallen-the-Black-Knight impersonators on a stage.)_

Zero Imposter: (This one actually does a decent impression) (Blah, blah… Something about liberation, society, and many big words the crowd doesn't understand.)  
Kallen Imposter: (In an over-dramatized girlie voice) Oh, no! Look out, Commander Zero! It's the Lancelot!  
Zero Imposter: (Whips around) The Lancelot? Here?! Of all places!?  
Kallen Imposter: Oh, what will we do Commander Zero? Quick! We need a miracle! It's coming this way!  
(Beat)  
Kallen Imposter: Um… I SAID: It's coming this way!!  
(Long pause)  
Zero Imposter: (Fidgets on the stage) (Whispers) Where is he??  
Kallen Imposter: (Shrugs) (Whispers) He knows that's his cue!  
Suzaku: What's going on? I want to see the Lancelot! (Points the toy sword in the air defiantly)  
Ashleigh: I believe someone's missed their cue… Hate it when that happens.  
Shirley: Maybe it's just a dramatic pause?  
Kallen: Okay, I do NOT sound like that!  
C.C.: Sure you do.  
Kallen: What did you say?  
Lelouch: Nor do you say "Commander Zero."  
Milly: (Sighs) This is why the Theater Club's budget was reduced this year.  
Suzaku: Now I know how Jordan feels: (Shouts to the stage) Where's the Lancelot!?!  
Kallen Imposter: (Whispers to the Zero Imposter again) Quick! End the scene!  
Zero Imposter: (Whispers) How am I supposed to do that!? (Stage voice) Um…  
Kallen Imposter: (Points) Look! The Lancelot is firing angrily at us! If we don't retreat now we'll be killed! (Runs off Stage Right)  
Zero Imposter: Wait! (Stands motionless) Uhm… yeah. (Walks off Stage Right) +  
Lelouch: (Facepalm)  
Rivalz: Wow… that was… weak.  
Ashleigh: Yikes.  
Suzaku: Man, they're not going to show the Lancelot??  
Kallen: I suppose not.  
Ashleigh: Speaking of which, where's Jordan?  
(Everyone else shrugs. They eventually find her near backstage.)  
Jordan: (Clinging to the Lancelot Imposter's back) Lancelot: LAUNCH!  
Lancelot Imposter: What the-? Get off of me!

_Milly: Jordan, you interrupted the performance… Oh well!  
Rivalz: Madame Pres, I don't think that was the end. Look! (He points to the stage where the Zero __Imposter__ takes his place __center stage__.)  
Zero Imposter: At last! After the long battle I, Zero, have finally defeated Britannia!  
__Lelouch__: (Look a little interested now) I like where this is going.  
Zero Imposter: You may praise me now.  
Ashleigh: (Whispering to Jordan.) I think they got the ego part __right on target__.  
__Black Knight Imposters__ & Japanese People Imposters: All Hail Zero! All Hail Zero!  
__Kallen__: (Suddenly runs onstage and shoves the Zero Imposter off the apron.) Screw that! __**I**__ was the one who defeated the Lancelot! All Hail Kallen!__  
Kallen Imposter: (Pause) … (Shrugs) Alright.  
Audience: (Silent)_

Suzaku: Kallen? What are you doing?  
Kallen: Uhm… Oh, forget it. All Hail Kallen!!  
Cast: (Minus Zero Imposter) All Hail Kallen! All Hail Kallen! ….  
Zero Imposter: (His makeshift mask fell off when Kallen pushed him off the stage.) (He looks up to Lelouch glowering down at him)  
Lelouch: You're a disgrace to the uniform. (Turns and walks away)  
Suzaku: (On the stage- trying to break up C.C and Kallen, who have started arguing.)  
C.C.: (Being withheld by Suzaku) Why would anyone serve under someone like you?  
Kallen: Why don't you be quiet. You don't even have a place on the hierarchy!  
Suzaku: I have no idea what's going on but, please, we're making a scene!  
Ashleigh: When are we not making a scene? (Points to Jordan, who has tackled the Lancelot Imposter yet again.)  
Milly, Rivalz, and Shirley: (Just stand watching in the audience)

Later…

Shirley: (Bursts into the Student Council room) I'll go get the band-aids!  
Milly: (Helping Kallen into a chair) Wow, that got nasty very quickly.  
Rivalz: I'll say… That leap was almost inhuman.  
Kallen: (Holding a handkerchief to her bleeding hand) How was I supposed to know that she would bite me like that!?  
Suzaku: Did you see the look in her eyes? It was primal instinct or something.  
Jordan: (Holding onto C.C's left arm) Pft, more like witchcraft.  
Ashleigh: (Holding onto C.C's right arm) Now I understand why she was in that straightjacket for so long.  
Lelouch: (Holding onto C.C's shoulders) (He simply nods)  
C.C.: (Struggling) Common! I know I can take her! No one's had the gall to stand up to me like that in years!!  
Suzaku: I can see why.  
C.C.: (Barring her teeth)  
Kallen: (Flat look) Your fighting style is childish.  
Ashleigh: Hey, it's effective.  
Shirley: That's true… (Placing a band-aid) Wow! That's a deep gash!  
Jordan: It's like when Arthur bites Suzaku.  
Suzaku: (Winces) No, I think that's much worse.

_Milly: Speaking of Arthur… I was wondering, do any of you know the tale of the Frog Prince?  
(All shake their heads no.)  
__Milly: Well the tale goes, if a princess was to kiss the magical frog then he would turn into her prince! I bet the same thing would work with Arthur.  
Shirley: (Giggles) Oh Madame Pres, you and your stories.  
__Suzaku__: Right, but who's going to willingly kiss a cat? (Points to an innocent looking Arthur who is playing with his __ball of yarn__.)  
Arthur: (Looks up with big eyes and meows)  
Lelouch: I say you're all being ridiculous.  
Jordan: I vote Shirley!  
Shirley: Huh? Why me?  
Ashleigh: Yeah, Jordan she might drink the cat's blood.  
Jordan: Oh right.  
C.C.: (Wicked smile) I vote we make Kallen do it.  
Kallen: Hell no! Why don't you do it? You Green Haired Bi-  
Milly: Oh, well. I guess we have no choice but to let Rival do it. (Evil Grin)  
Rival: Aw, man!__  
(They all lean in a close circle as Rivalz gives Arthur a slight peck on the nose.)  
(Silence)  
Shirley: Nothing happened.  
__Ashleigh: (Sarcastically) Aw, I was so looking forward to it too.  
Jordan: Of course it didn't work! You need a princess to do it!  
Nunnally: Do you mind if I try?  
Lelouch: Nunnally, are you sure?  
Nunnally: (Laughs) I think it'll be fun, big brother!  
(Once again they all lean in as Nunnally gives Arthur a peck in the nose.)  
(Smoke)  
(Strobe Light)  
(More dramatic effects)  
(The Cat Formerly Known as Arthur now turns into....)  
Everyone: CLOVIS!?_

Clovis: Drat! My cover has been blown!  
Shirley: (Shrieks)  
Nunnally: Is that… Clovis?  
Rivalz: (Jumps) I knew it! I told all of you! He faked his death!  
Suzaku: But I was framed for that!  
Jordan: … Actually, I'm not that shocked.  
Ashleigh: Yeah, me neither.  
Lelouch: But I… he was…. And I…  
Clovis: Do not fear! I will quickly disappear from sight! (Flails his arms in the air with spirit fingers) Away…!!!  
Everyone: …  
Clovis: (Still standing there) … (Darts out of the room)  
Kallen: Well that was… eventful.  
C.C.: (To no one in particular) No wonder you killed him.  
Suzaku: Yeah, I'm not that upset about getting the credit for that now… For a little while at least.  
Clovis: (Suddenly bursts into the room) I've forgotten! You all know too much! I must do away with you! (Starts throwing glitter on them)

Lelouch: (Wakes up screaming)  
(Someone throws an empty box of candy at him.)  
(He looks around to see everyone tossed around the Student Council Room, passed out in random positions and places.)  
Jordan: (Sleeping on a couch with no cushions)  
Ashleigh: (Sleeping on the floor on the cushions of aforementioned couch.)  
C.C.: (Curled in the corner with some pizza and using her Zero costume's cape as a blanket.)  
Kallen: (Sitting at Jordan's feet on the couch with her head in her hand- sleeping)  
Suzaku: (Lying face down on the table)  
Milly: (Sleeping in a chair with her head on a separate desk)  
Nina: (Slumped over the table Suzaku's lying on)  
Shirley: (Using three chairs side-by-side as a makeshift bed)  
Rivalz: (Lying on the floor with a towel over his face)  
Lelouch: (Stands up) What happened? (Walks over to the giant, almost empty punch bowl. The punch smells of alcohol.) … Pres…  
Milly: (Laughs softly in her sleep)  
Lelouch: (Sighs) It must've been a dream then. But where's- (He spots Arthur on his perch, sleeping as well.) Hmn, it was just a dream.  
(After Lelouch leaves the room Arthur wakes up and meows knowingly, licking glitter off of his paws.)

Owari!!

XxX

**Author's Notes-** Again, our absence isn't entirely my fault this time. I'll take a bit of blame because I didn't force Jordan to write, I just yelled at her a bit- and we all know that that doesn't work.

+ This mark is there because in our own Theater class, someone has left the stage like that. On opening night, he forgot his line and cue to exit, so… yeah.

_**Author's Notes-**__ Yeah... We did write a little anecdote during (Trumpets) Ashleigh's B-day party! And thank Suzaku we did not get in a car crash this time… But for some reason, every chapter after her birthday we have to have alcohol in it somewhere.... Interesting...._

**I shall post the anecdote next chapter,**

_**-Destiny**_

Next Chapter: Untitled (Summary: Yes, we actually have a preview this time. The day after the party we were watching daytime TV and tossing around ideas…  
That's all you need to know.)


	23. Cat Fight!

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or the Jerry Springer Show… or Pizza Hut…**

**Author's Notes- **Wow, I'm amazed that we managed to finish this chapter for the month. And I know I've used this excuse before, but in all honesty this month has been _insane_. And I don't see October being any better. At least not until the middle of the month- after the play. Man, I'm getting pretty tired of Robin Hood…

_**Author's Notes- **__Okay sorry it's a __last minute__ update again but enjoy this while we still do it! Because it's __senior year__! Who knows what will happen when we go to college!_

xXx

One day, in the Clubhouse...

(A loud bang and two muffled female voices are heard screaming at each other)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (On another end of the Clubhouse in a corridor) (Wince)  
Jordan: Man, you can still hear them on the other side of the building!  
Ashleigh: Honestly... Have you figured out why they've been arguing so much lately?  
Jordan: (Shakes her head) No clue.  
Ashleigh: They probably don't know either. (Opens a door) ...  
Jordan: (Walks through the door) Lulu? Why are you in here?  
Lelouch: (Sitting in a chair in the abandoned club room) Why do you think?  
Ashleigh: (Nods) Yes, the last time he tried holding C.C back she almost gnawed his hand off.  
Jordan: (Shuts the door) It's not totally quiet here either.  
Lelouch: Unfortunately.  
Ashleigh: Family dysfunction at it's finest.  
Jordan: What's that supposed to mean? They aren't related.  
Ashleigh: I wasn't being literal.... but you just gave me an idea, Jordy.  
Jordan: Oh, no...  
Ashleigh: (Hits her) Have faith in me for once!  
Jordan: Fiiine! But I want to know what the plan is first!  
Ashleigh: (Whispers the plan to Jordan)  
Jordan: Yes!  
Lelouch: (Overhearing) I have no idea what any of that means, so you two are definitely up to no good.  
Jordan: (To Ashleigh) But how are we supposed to do that? You remember what happened last time...  
Ashleigh: We'll just have to find a way to bring the solution here... (Glances at Lelouch) You. You're coming with us.  
Lelouch: Doubt it.  
Ashleigh: No really. We need you for leverage.  
Lelouch: Leverage...?

Later... through the portal in the storage shed...!!

Ashleigh and Jordan: (Walking up to a large building whilst dragging a Chibi Lulu)  
Lelouch: (Struggling) Let go of me! And where are we? Another dimension?  
Jordan: I'd forgotten that we wiped all of their memories.  
Lelouch: Let me go!!

_(Inside the building in a lavish office)  
Ashleigh: Look Jerry. You've just got to come with us.  
Jordan: And bring all your cameramen.  
Jerry Springer: I'm not sure.  
Ashleigh: I promise it will be one of your most fulfilling shows.  
Jordan: And you might also want to bring some of your guards.  
Jerry: Speaking of guards… how did you manage to get past them?__  
Ashleigh: Well....__  
(They all look out the window to see chibi Lulu being chased by the guards. For some odd reason he is able to escape them without using geass.)  
Jerry: Alright, you've convinced me. I'll be ready in 30 minutes._

_Back in the __Code Geass__ realm…_

_Jerry: So how do you plan on getting these girls here? And where is my audience!?  
Ashleigh: Milly is bringing Kallen.  
Jordan: And the Pizza Hut Guy is luring C.C. here.  
Jerry: Pizza Hut?  
Ashleigh: Rivalz and Suzaku are in charge of getting the audience here.  
Jordan: When I called Suzy last time he had around 400 people.  
Jerry: How is he getting all those people here?  
Lelouch: (Back to normal) Never underestimate those two._

_(The next thing they see is the Lancelot rolling over a hill with carts attached to it like a train.)_

Jordan: (Gapes) I didn't know you could do that!  
Ashleigh: (Looks at Lelouch) That thing has a hitch?  
Lelouch: (Shrugs)  
Jerry: Is that… What I think it is…?  
Jordan: Yep! That's High-Quality Giant-Humanoid-Mecha, right there!  
Ashleigh: (Nods) Japanese Engineering.  
Lelouch: But Britannia produced the Lancelot; Schneizel helped design it.  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Look at each other and laugh) You just wouldn't understand, Lulu.  
Jerry: (Yelling at the cameramen) Are you getting this!?  
Suzaku: (Pulls up in the Lancelot and hops out, riding down the single-step ladder thing) Hey, guys! What'd I miss?  
Ashleigh: Nothing yet, Suzy. We just got here.  
Suzaku: I told you to stop calling me that. But anyway, I've got about 500 people here… A lot of them are from the military though.  
Jordan: That doesn't matter. How's Rivalz getting along?  
Suzaku: Don't know.

(Later, Rivalz shows up with around twenty people)  
Rivalz: Man! How did you get all of those people, Suzaku?!  
Suzaku: (Helping the crew set up) (Shrugs) Easy, I stood on the street asking who wanted to see a girl-on-girl fight. After I found pictures of the two of them, it was extremely easy.  
Rivalz: … Dammit! Why didn't I think of that!?  
Milly: (Walks in with Kallen) Helloo everybody! I brought Kallen!  
Kallen: (Looks around, confused) But, Madame President, you said I had to make up time in school in order to pass.  
Milly: (Laughs) Silly, we don't have that kind of policy! All the better to get you down here! (Looks around the Jerry Springer set) Is that a stripper pole??

_Jerry: Well I didn't know what to expect. But from the look of things I'm glad it's part of the set.  
Jordan: Sorry Jerry, the blonde isn't part of the package.  
Jerry: Where's the other girl then?  
Ashleigh: Here she comes.  
(They turn around to see the Pizza Hut Guy on a moped going full speed with a green-haired girl on the back eating a __slice of pizza__.)  
(The Pizza Guy's moped comes to a full, sliding stop at the edge of the stage.)  
Pizza Guy: Alright. I got her here. Now pay me.  
(Ashleigh slips him a fifty-dollar bill- stolen from Lulu- and he speeds off.)  
Jerry: So this is the other woman, huh? (Circling around C.C.) What's with the green hair? I've seen many a trashy hairstyle in my day, but honestly?  
Jordan: Don't you dare diss the hair!  
Ashleigh: Calm down Jordan, before we put you on the show too.  
Kallen: What is she doing here!? (Points to C.C.)  
C.C.: Mmmh, you really are slow. This is a TV set. They're putting us on a TV show. Come along and sit down so we can get it over with.  
Jerry: Alrighty then.  
_

Later...

(The lights come up to C.C. sitting in a chair alone on the stage. The Jerry Springer Theme music plays and the camera zooms in on Jerry, standing amongst the cheering audience.)  
Jerry: Hello and welcome. We have a special show for you today, taking place in (Glances at his index cards) ... Tokyo, Japan!  
Majority of Audience: BOO!!  
Jerry: (Flinches) What? What did I say?  
Milly: (Stands up beside Jerry) The Tokyo Settlement in Area 11.  
Jerry: Well anyway, today's guests have had some tension come between them, and their friends have asked for an intervention to find the root of the problem. First we have C.C. (Walks down to the stage) Now, C.C. your friends say that you and Kallen have been at each other's throats lately.  
C.C.: That's correct.  
Jerry: Do you have any idea why that is?  
C.C.: (Shrugs) Probably jealousy.  
Jerry: Jealousy?  
C.C.: Yes. She seems to have feelings for the person I live with.  
Kallen: (Backstage) WHAT!?!  
Jerry: Oh, so this is a romance tiff?  
C.C.: Most likely.  
Suzaku: (Also backstage) (Leans over to whoever is standing next to him) Who is she talking about?  
Jerry: And how do you feel about this?  
C.C.: It's annoying. That redheaded floozy has got to go.  
Jerry: Well... Let's bring her our, shall we? Here's Kallen!

_(Kallen storms onto stage and starts fighting with C.C.)  
Kallen: Who are you calling a floozy you witch!?  
C.C.: (Dodging almost every punch.) Well if you had your emotions in check and didn't get so worked up over every little thing.  
Kallen: (Does a kick very similar to the Suzaku-Kick.) I don't get worked up!!  
Suzaku: (Stands and points) She stole my move!  
C.C.: See Jerry, here she goes again.  
Jerry: What are they? Ninjas? Just look at how they move!  
Milly: (Walks up on stage and starts tousling Kallen's hair.) Alright… let's all calm down here.  
Kallen: What the…?  
Ashleigh: (Yelling from backstage) Milly get off the stage! You're interrupting the show!  
Jordan: Isn't that usually my job?  
Jerry: Alright girls, let's have a seat and discuss this.  
(Kallen and C.C. sit. Milly goes offstage again.)  
Jerry: So Kallen, what do you think the trouble is?  
Kallen: I'm tired of her attitude. She acts as if nothing bothers her!  
C.C.: Jerry, are we allowed to eat pizza on the set?  
Kallen: See! Listen to her monotone voice! And that pizza obsession!  
Jerry: So I noticed. C.C. what is with that pizza obsession?__  
C.C.: (Eating some pizza Suzaku brought to her) Why should I not indulge in the things I like?  
Kallen: When they'll make you fat.  
C.C.: (Smirks) You'd like that, wouldn't you?  
Jerry: Okay! Now C.C., you mentioned the fighting might be because of an affair?  
C.C.: I told you. I just live with him.  
Kallen: (Glares at C.C) And I'M not in love with him.  
Jerry: Well why don't we bring him out anyway!_

Suzaku: (Backstage) I still don't get it. Bring who out??  
Jordan: (Pokes Lelouch) That's your cue.  
Lelouch: This won't be broadcasted in this realm, will it?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: No, now go! (Shove him onstage)  
Suzaku: Wait, so they were talking about Lelouch?  
Lelouch: (Walking onstage) C.C, why don't you stop this nonsense already?  
C.C.: Whatever are you talking about?  
Lelouch: You know exactly what I mean.  
Kallen: (Crosses her arms) Really. This is ridiculous and I'm sick of it.  
C.C.: (To Kallen) I don't see why you get so heated. You hardly talked to him before you found out that he was-  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Somehow manage to get to the sound booth bleep out the end of her sentence.)  
Kallen: It's because you're telling lies!  
Jerry: So you don't...?  
Kallen: NO!  
Lelouch: C.C. Stop instigating already. You know the real reason.  
C.C.: (Sniffles) (Think Moe-Amnesia-C.C.) Why would you gang up against me like this? Yes, I do know the real reason, but I... I just...  
(Backstage)  
Suzaku: That's a face I've never seen her put on before.  
Jordan: What... is she... doing...  
Milly: Looks like she's... acting?  
Ashleigh: (Laughs) She's twirling Lelouch and Kallen like marionettes!  
(Onstage)  
Jerry: It's alright, C.C. This is why we're here, to bring it all out in the open.  
C.C.: Oh, Jerry. You're right. I just- want him all to myself.  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Backstage) Wait- what?  
C.C.: And I suppose I argue with Kallen because, well, I don't know.  
Kallen: Seriously? Jerry, you can't believe this!  
C.C.: (To Lelouch) Well, the two of you spend much more time together, what with the-  
(Bleep) (Courtesy of Ashleigh and Jordan)  
C.C: - and everything. And she's your most trusted ace, isn't she? You must be closer than I thought...  
Kallen and Lelouch: What!?  
Lelouch: (Facepalm) C.C. You're making a fool of yourself. Now drop the act and let's go.  
C.C.: But... How could you say that?

_C.C.: … After you let me spend countless nights in your bed…  
Jerry: Wait. You were taking advantage of this young girl??  
Lelouch: It- It's not what you think! Don't say things that can be taken out of context! I found her on the street and took her in! And how does she repay me? By stealing my credit card and ordering pounds upon pounds of pizza!  
Jerry: C.C. is this true?  
C.C.: (Back to normal) Fine. I admit it....  
Ashleigh: Wow, talk about a mood swing.  
C.C.: I'm... a pizza addict.  
Audience:(Gasp)  
Jordan: (Falls to her knees.) NOOO!!  
Ashleigh: (Kicks her) Jordan you already knew that!  
Jordan: (Getting back up) Oh right.  
Jerry: Well we're almost out of time, so here's what were going to do: C.C., we're sending you to Pizzaholics Anonymous. Kallen, were sending you to __anger management classes__. And Lelouch, maybe you should be a man and not let these women push you around!  
Milly: You tell him Jerry!_

Jerry: And so we go to commercial. We'll be right back!  
(The theme music plays and the audience cheers)  
Lelouch: (To C.C.) Lucky for me this isn't going to be aired here. You just have to say strange things like that, don't you?  
C.C.: What? It was the truth.  
Lelouch: But only half of the truth.  
C.C.: So what? It's not my fault you have a lost soul like me living in your room.  
Lelouch: Then whose fault is it then?  
Kallen: (Talking to Jerry across the stage) ANGER MANAGEMENT?? Who says I need anger management!?! I'm perfectly fine!  
Jerry: (Holds up his hands) That's not for you to decide.  
C.C.: (To Kallen) Take a look at yourself- you're letting your emotions get out of control again.  
Kallen: (Deadpan) Coming from a helpless girl in love.  
C.C.: You have no idea what real love feels like.  
Kallen: And I suppose you do, witch?  
Ashleigh: (In the sound booth) (Hits the button that plays the wrestling/boxing/fighting bell)  
Jordan: Ash!  
Ashleigh: What?  
(Some guards come in and set up a bunch of chairs on the stage for everyone to sit in.)  
(Kallen, C.C., Lelouch, Suzaku, Milly, Jordan, and Ashleigh sit on the stage)  
Jerry: Time for the audience comments.  
(Theme music plays again with the audience cheering)  
Jerry: Welcome back! And now we go to the audience. (Goes into the crowd to a guy raising his hand up)  
Random Audience Member #1: Okay, this is for the, uh, angry chick with the red hair. Why don't you make the show interesting and get some Jerry Beads?  
Kallen: Jerry Beads?  
Ashleigh: (Whispers) Like Mardi gras. Show your assets; get some beads.  
Kallen: (Blush) What!? No!!  
Audience in Unison: Aw….  
Jerry: (Goes to the next audience member)

_Audience Member #2: (Female) This is for the boy with the dark hair: You're a __good looking guy__, why do you let these girls push you around?  
Ashleigh: Pft, simple: He's a pansy.  
Lelouch: Hey!  
Suzaku: Well Lelouch… it is true.  
Audience Member #2: Well if you ever get tired of it- (Makes the "call me" hand gesture and winks) –anytime, sweetcakes.  
Jerry: Okay… Next question. (To the next person)  
Audience Member #3: Question for the girl with the short brown hair:  
Ashleigh: (Looks up) Yes?  
Audience Member #3: Who are you?  
Ashleigh: Oh, Jordan and I live with these people, all in one big house. Kind of like Love Hina without the love.  
Audience Member #3: How do you stand them?  
Lelouch: It's more like how do WE stand THEM.  
Jordan: Simple. Lots of Skittles.  
Audience Member #3: What does Skittles have to do with anything?  
Suzaku: Next question please!_

Jerry: (Walks to the next audience member… who happens to be Shirley)  
Milly: Shirley? What are you doing in the audience?  
Shirley: A better question is where was I when all of this was going on! (Points in the direction of Kallen and C.C)  
C.C.: (Grins) Silly girl. None of this was real. Well, except Kallen's overreactions, that is.  
Kallen: Yes Shirley, it was all a fake, including all of C.C's emotions. (Glare)  
C.C.: (Smirk) Don't forget Kallen's fake chest.  
Audience: Oooohh!!  
Jordan: (Falls out of her chair laughing)  
Suzaku: Whoa! I think we just crossed a line here!  
Kallen: (Turning as red as her hair) WHAT!?!  
Ashleigh: Jerry, I believe it would be best to end the show now…  
Jerry: You're probably right. (Goes to his corner of the stage) First, I'd like to thank all of you for coming onto the show today. In life you'll have many friends, some will fade away, while others will stick it out to life's bitter ends. But if you notice that you have a friend who doesn't make reaching those ends worth it, then they may not be a friend at all. Until next time: Take care of yourselves, and each other.  
(Theme music plays and audience cheers)  
Kallen: (Still sitting red-faced, staring angrily at C.C., who stares back blankly.)  
Suzaku: Kallen… Are you alright?  
Jerry: Well this was a very interesting show to say the least…  
Lelouch: (Puts his face in his hands) That's putting it mildly.  
Milly and Suzaku: (Pick up Kallen by her shoulders and ankles while she remains like a statue.) (They haul her away)  
C.C.: (To Lelouch) Where's your credit card? I need celebratory pizza.

_Jerry: (Turns to shake hands with Ashleigh and Jordan) Thank you for the opportunity. We hope to hear from you guys again and let us know how everything is going.  
(Both Nod)  
(After Jerry and all his crew are gone and the audience has been returned… Back at the Clubhouse!)  
Suzaku: Wow C.C. Who knew you could act like that? Or trash talk like that?  
Milly: Something's been bothering me though. Where did that TV-show-host and camera crew come from? I've never heard of him before.  
Ashleigh: Oh Milly, don't you know by now not to question the things we do.  
Jordan: Plus you don't want to know. It would just scare you._

Milly: Yes, you're probably right.  
Lelouch: Believe me. For once, they are right.  
Suzaku: It's funny, I feel like I know where he came from, but I've never heard of him either…  
Jordan: (Waves her hand) It's probably just your imagination.  
(Everyone walks into the Student Council room)  
Nunnally: (Listening to the TV) Welcome back, everyone.  
Lelouch: Hey, Nunnally. We're back.  
Suzaku: What's on the TV?  
Nunnally: Oh, just a show I thought sounded interesting, so I kept in on that channel.  
Milly: It looks kind of familiar too…  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Trying to silently laugh hysterically in the background)  
Kallen: (Crashing back to Earth) Oh, no. Nunnally don't tell me that's-!  
Nunnally: Whenever they come back from commercial they play music and everyone's chanting, it sounds like a nice program.  
C.C.: I'm sorry, Nunnally but this show isn't very nice at all.  
Nunnally: Really? Oh well, I like when the audience chants.  
Lelouch: (To Suzaku) I thought he said that it wouldn't be broadcasted here.  
Suzaku: (Shrugs)  
Nunnally: (Quietly chanting to herself with the audience on TV) Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

Owari!!

XxX

**Author's Notes- **For some strange reason, whenever I write a fanfiction with a friend like this there is always a chapter with the Jerry Springer Show. As for the ending: I thought Nunnally chanting "Jerry! Jerry!" was the cutest thing on the planet- so I had to do it.

_**Author's Notes-**_ _So just in case I don't say it enough: … Skittles...Oh and review!! It gives us encouragement to write. It let's us know you care! Also, it reminds us we need to write.... So review!_

**Until next month,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter:** Disappearing Act (Summary: Yet again, people vanish. But who does remains to be seen…. That's kind of an oxymoron, isn't it?)

Special Anecdote:

**Britannian ****Family Reunion**

(The Reunion takes place in a huge yard/garden.)  
(Lelouch and Schneizel are playing chess)  
Lelouch: That's it. I'm sick of this. (Stands up and attempts to use geass on Schneizel) I order you to forfeit.  
Schneizel: (Stares blankly) (Suddenly lunges towards him and bites him)  
Lelouch: (Shaking his arm- trying to get Schneizel off) Get him off! Get him off!  
Euphemia: (With a water gun) Hit him in the face!  
Clovis: (Swoons into the pool)  
Cornelia: (Watching from a golf cart) ... (Floors it)  
Nunnally: (Sitting at the table. She tugs on Odysseus's sleeve) What's going on?  
Odysseus: (Cutting his steak) Your brothers are idiots.  
Emperor Quaker Oats: (Continues eating; thinking) This is why I love these family functions.  
Marianne: (Eating as well) Now, now, boys. Don't be so rowdy.

END

**A/N:** Please… don't ask how this came about… It had something to do with atheists biting people… I don't know. Just… don't ask. It's stupid. Let's leave it at that, shall we?


	24. Vanishing Act

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Robin Hood… This is probably the shortest disclaimer we've ever had…!**

**Author's Notes- **Yeah, yeah, I know. Don't remind me. I had a cold/the flu at the beginning of the month, you know? But that's what I get for carving Jack-o-Lanterns in 40 degree weather in a tank-top. Haha!

But anyway, we're trying to backtrack in our writing style, because I know I'm getting more and more disappointed in us… This should resemble earlier chapters.

_**Author's Notes- **__Sorry we're late. Please don't be mad at us. I'll give you cookies._

xXx

_It's late in the morning at the Clubhouse… All is peaceful and quiet..._

_Lelouch: (Thinking) Wait... It's not supposed to be this quiet!  
Suzaku: Hey Lelouch… What's going on around here?  
Lelouch: So you noticed the lack of commotion too?  
C.C.: (Walks in with pizza in hand.) My Pizza is cold.  
Lelouch: Well then you shouldn't have slept in so late.  
C.C.: In my defense, Jordan and Ashleigh usually wake me up by now.  
Suzaku: Where are they anyways!?!_

C.C.: (Nibbles the pizza) Beats me. They left the pizza box open.  
Lelouch: Of course that's all you're worried about.  
Suzaku: I get the feeling that they're… planning something.  
Lelouch: Don't even joke about something like that. If they were, there's no telling what would happen.  
Suzaku: I know. That's why it's a bad feeling…  
C.C.: I mean, it's not even cold! It's lukewarm! I wouldn't have a problem with cold pizza, in fact, it's very good. But-  
Lelouch: C.C.! To the problem at hand, if you don't mind. Now Suzaku, are your keys missing?

_(Suzaku reaches in his left pocket and gets a worried look on his face. Then he reaches in the right pocket and pulls out his keys.)  
Suzaku: This really doesn't make any sense!  
Lelouch: I guess I should call everyone and see if anyone has seen them…  
(Lelouch picks up the phone and dials for Milly first)  
Milly: Lelouch, I don't know why you're calling me at a time like this but-  
Lelouch: Yes, Yes, Madame President. I know it's time for your Polo Practice, but I was just wondering if you've seen Jordan or Ashleigh around?  
Milly: Marco! (Giggles) Sorry Lelouch, I haven't.  
Lelouch: Alright then, thanks. (He hangs up and then dials for Shirley)_

C.C.: I'm guessing she had no idea.  
Suzaku: Probably not… The Pres usually plays Polo around this time…  
C.C.: (Nods and walks upstairs)  
Lelouch: (Hangs up and dials again) Hey Rival, I- What? … Are you at it already? … No, if he's doing that then- … Not as bizarre as you think. …  
Suzaku: (A mix of worried and appalled) ???  
Lelouch: No, not that one. The other one. … What do you mean that's what he wants?  
Suzaku: (Getting closer to appalled) !!  
Lelouch: Look, just move the knight to- Wait, wait! Rival, I don't have time to coach you at chess now! (Hangs up)  
Suzaku: (Breathes a sigh of relief) Did you even ask him if he knew anything?  
Lelouch: No. I doubt it anyway.  
C.C.: (Coming back downstairs) Lelouch, there's something you should know.  
Lelouch: What? Did you microwave that slice of pizza you've been complaining about all morning?  
C.C.: No, I went to ask Nunnally if she knew where the two of them went. She didn't, but after checking your room I noticed that-  
Lelouch: The cape is gone, isn't it?  
Suzaku: Now that's actually kind of normal…

_Lelouch: Alright Suzaku, you stay here and keep lookout. C.C., come with me. We're going to look for them.  
(After Lelouch and C.C. leave the Clubhouse Suzaku makes a call to Lloyd...)  
C.C.: Where are we going?  
Lelouch: Going to call reinforcements.  
C.C.: Oh Lelouch, you can't always count on the Black Knights to do your dirty work.  
Lelouch: Just come on!  
(Forgetting that he has two copies of the Zero outfit, hooks up the intercom system and reads the announcement over the speakers at Black Knight HQ.)  
Zero: Attention. Two soldiers have gone missing. I believe we can all guess which ones. If you have any information about the two rogues, report it to Ohgi or C.C.._

_(Back at the Clubhouse…)  
Suzaku: Hey Lloyd. Thanks for bringing me all these supplies.  
Lloyd: No problem, Kururugi. Just remember you owe me one for now.  
(Lloyd looks around at all the supplies.)  
Lloyd: Should I ask what all this is for? (Looks over to see Suzaku with a serious face and a taser in one hand.) Perhaps not…_

(Meanwhile…)

C.C.: (Returning to the Clubhouse…) What a wasted trip.  
Lelouch: Well, do you have any suggestions? That was the best lead we had.  
C.C.: The fact that the cape was missing doesn't mean that they would go to the Black Knights. The Black Knights might not be the brightest crayons in the box, but I'm willing to guess that even Tamaki would notice if Zero had breasts.  
Lelouch: (Facepalm) Always a big help, C.C.

(Back at the Clubhouse…)

(C.C. and Lelouch walk into the main room of the clubhouse, where Lloyd and Suzaku are.)  
Suzaku: (Pointing the taser at Lloyd) Just hold still, Lloyd! I've always wanted to try one of these!  
Lloyd: (Backing away) Ahaha, Suzaku, I don't think that's a very good idea…  
Suzaku: What?  
Lelouch: Suzaku… what exactly are you doing?  
Suzaku: Oh, uhm… (Glances at the taser gun) Just bluffing, Lloyd! Why would you think that I'd taser you? (Laughs uneasily)  
Lloyd: Right… Well, I should be going now! (Runs out the door)  
C.C.: (Waves)  
Suzaku: I'm planning a stakeout! The taser is just… precautionary…  
Lelouch: Right…

_(Milly and Rivalz walk through the door.)  
Lelouch: (Attacked by the door) Ow! Hey!  
Milly: Sorry Lulu, maybe you shouldn't stand in front of the door.  
Rivalz: (Looks around the room) Suzaku, Suzaku! What is all of this?  
Lelouch: Ashleigh and Jordan are still missing.  
Milly: And the artillery is for…?  
Suzaku: In case they plan an attack!  
C.C.: Well, just look at who we're talking about.  
Milly: I guess I could send out a search party for them.  
Lelouch: Madame Pres, I don't think we need to bother the police with this matter.  
C.C.: (Mumbles) You just don't want the police coming to search and find out that you're Zero.  
Lelouch: (Elbows C.C. in the ribcage) Since everyone else is here, I might as well call Kallen and see if she knows anything…._

(Meanwhile…)

Kallen: (Walking down the street, her phone rings) (Coughing, sounding sickly) Yes? This is Kallen.  
Lelouch: Kallen, we have a situation that-  
Kallen: (Normally) Oh, Lelouch it's just you. Please tell me there's something with the… organization that needs to be done because I've got a lot of anger to vent.  
Lelouch: What are you-?  
Kallen: I mean, I was just walking down the street and saw two Britannian girls mistreating this eleven woman who was minding her own business! I wanted to turn around and tell those bi-  
Lelouch: Kallen! I don't have time for this. No one can find Ashleigh and Jordan, and I need to know if-  
Kallen: Hold on. People are vanishing again? Are they being spirited away by Suzaku or something?  
Lelouch: There's no telling.  
Kallen: What's with people suddenly disappearing for completely incoherent reasons? This isn't an anime! (Looks at the "camera")  
Lelouch: Regardless, you should come join us before the Pres sends the entire school on another chase.  
Kallen: (Still staring at the "camera") Ever have the feeling you're being watched?  
Lelouch: (Sighs and hangs up)

_(After an hour or two Kallen finally shows up.)  
Kallen: (Walking in the door) You know Lelouch, I'm staring to get tired of- ...Why does Suzaku have a taser? And what is all this!?  
Suzaku: What? Can I not simply play with a taser?  
Milly: It's precautionary.  
Lelouch: Yes, yes we've already gone over this.  
Rivalz: So… where are we all sleeping tonight?  
C.C.: Well, the last time all of us slept in here, we had a gigantic fort.  
Milly: And where was I!? Lulu, I'm ashamed that you would exclude me from such activities.  
Lelouch: Well, I wasn't exactly a co-conspirator on that.  
C.C.: Why did the girl with Mattress-Space have to disappear?  
Milly: Mattress-Space? I think I have something like that... (Pulls a full bed out her "Mallet-Space".)  
Kallen: (Gawks) (Curls up on the bed) Do you have any more of these?__  
Milly: Just two more… So, Kallen and Rivalz can share a bed… Suzaku and Lelouch can share one… And I guess C.C. and I will share one.  
Kallen: Why do Rivalz and I have to share one!?__  
Milly: Well Kallen, we're fairly positive that Rivalz is too afraid of you to try anything.  
Kallen: (Looks frightened)  
Lelouch: Alright, we'll work in shifts. At least one person has to be awake at any time during the night. Otherwise this stakeout is just a slumber party.  
Suzaku: (Throws a pillow at Lelouch's face) Yeah right, like we're gonna listen to you._

(Later… when everyone is lying down to sleep…)

Suzaku: (Turns off the lights using a remote control)  
Kallen: (Tries to sleep) Oh, this is so awkward…  
Rivalz: That reminds me, Pres, are you planning on going to prom this year?  
Milly: Oh, I don't know… It is my senior year after all…  
Rivalz: What about you Lelouch?  
Lelouch: (Scoffs) No.  
Rivalz: But why? It's high school tradition. You have to go.  
Lelouch: Exactly who says I have to dress up for a single night of formalities?  
Suzaku: It's not that big of a deal.  
Rivalz: Listen Lelouch, you are going. I'm going to make sure of it. And I'm going to take lots of pictures!  
Lelouch: Doubt it.  
Rivalz: I got it! I'll take a picture of him in an embarrassing position in his sleep and blackmail him.  
Milly: Saying your plans aloud is never a good idea, Rival.  
(A few minutes later, Rivalz tries to stealthily crawl around the bed Suzaku and Lelouch are sharing with his cellphone-camera drawn.)  
Kallen: (When Rivalz is about to leap up and take the picture) Hey, where'd Rivalz go?  
Suzaku: (Trying to cover) Oh, I think he went to the bathroom.  
Rivalz: (Leaps)  
Lelouch: (Sees it coming a mile away) (Shoves a pillow in the way of the camera)  
Rivalz: Man! I was so close!! (Goes back to his place) If someone wouldn't have ruined it. (Pokes Kallen)  
Kallen: (Lightly punches Rivalz in the stomach) Shut up, I want to sleep.  
Lelouch: (In the dark, blindly throws the remote Suzaku had in the general direction of Rivalz.)  
Rivalz: (Hit in the face with the remote) Agh!!

_(The next morning…)  
__Rivalz: (With a big square mark on his face.) Man Lelouch, that really hurt last night.  
C.C.: (Walking by) That's what she said.  
Lelouch: (To C.C.) Let's not start that again.  
Kallen: I wonder if Ashleigh and Jordan ever showed up.  
Suzaku: Hey, did we ever check that shed with the lone door on the inside?  
C.C.: That would have made sense wouldn't it?  
Lelouch: (Facepalm)  
(They all run to the shed.)  
Milly: Oh look here's a convenient log that tells when the door was last used.__  
(The rest stare blankly at her.)  
Rivalz: Wow, that is convenient.  
Lelouch: It says it was last used... At five a.m. this morning…  
Kallen: (Shocked) Oh god, that means…!  
Suzaku: They're back!!  
Milly: Back to headquarters!  
(The rest stare blankly at her again.)  
Milly: What are you waiting for? RUN! RUN! RUN!  
(They all listen to her and dart back to the Clubhouse.)  
(Everyone runs into the Clubhouse living room and collapse on the floor.)  
Jordan: (Walks in with pizza in one hand and Cheese-kun in the other) Hey guys! What's everyone out of breath for?  
(They all scream and jump behind the bags of sand and the couch. C.C. takes a slice of Jordan's pizza and examines her makeshift Cheese-kun.)  
Rivalz: (Whispers) Do you think we're safe?  
Ashleigh: (Looks over the bags of sand) What is everyone doing down here?  
(They all scream again and jump up.)_

Rivalz: Don't hurt us!!  
Jordan: (Stares) Huh?  
Ashleigh: I'm not sure what's going on… but I'm liking the fear thing.  
Kallen: Whatever it is you're plotting it won't work!  
Ashleigh: … (Turns to Jordan) I don't get it.  
Jordan: (Shrugs) Maybe they think you're still the Evil Prince John.  
Milly: Evil Prince John?  
Jordan: Yeah, that was her character in the play, don't you remember? Robin Hood?  
Ashleigh: You did tell them about it, didn't you, Merry Man?  
Jordan: Well, yeah! (Reaching into her pocket for her cellphone) I know I sent Suzy a text just yesterday-  
Suzaku: She's got a weapon! (Leaps over the sand bags and tackles Jordan)  
Ashleigh: (Stares) Suzaku, what the hell?  
Jordan: (Squirming) There's no way you're getting that plastic sword from us now!  
Lelouch: (Coming out of the shock) Wait, so you mean to tell us that the entire time, you were playing tyrant, and you were… whatever a Merry Man is supposed to do?  
Jordan: (Pushes Suzaku) Yep! Common Lulu, have you never heard of Robin Hood and his Merry Men?  
Ashleigh: Jordan, Robin Hood might not exist in this universe.  
Jordan: Bummer.

_Ashleigh: Oh, right that reminds me... (Pulls the cape from her Mattress-Space) I believe this is yours, Lulu. I needed it for the play, you know?  
__Kallen: So you were off acting in a play?  
Jordan: Yep! Oh, and __Pretty Green Eyes__...  
Suzaku: Yes?  
Jordan: GET OFF OF ME! (Hits him with Cheese-kun)  
C.C.: Hey! That's not a weapon!  
Lelouch: That's it!  
(All stare at him)  
Lelouch: I'm getting out of here! Nunnally, pack your things! Were going on vacation!  
Jordan: Vacation?  
Ashleigh: Then we're going too!  
Jordan: Where to, Lulu?  
Lelouch: No! You're not coming!  
C.C.: I've always wanted to vacation in the mountains…  
Suzaku: Especially during winter when you can ski!  
Ashleigh: It's settled then. We vacation in the mountains!__  
Lelouch: (Exasperated) (Storms up the stairs)  
Jordan: (Starts packing her bag)  
Ashleigh: Jordan... Not now!_

Owari!!

XxX

_**Author's Notes- **__So, that part where everyone is all sleeping in the beds... actually happened between our friends Kelli, Emily and us.  
_

_And once again please don't be mad. Were having to deal with this (Bad Word) in our theater class, and all of our energy is going to destroying her life. So if anyone wants to help kill her and make our lives a little easier please do!_

**Author's Notes-** Jordan's Author's Notes get to go first because what I say makes more sense this way.

Regarding what Jordan's ranting about, she's afraid of me, and I yelled at her this week so I should be okay for a few more days, haha. And the sleepover fiasco happened on Mischief Night (the night before Halloween), and that explains it. It does.

**I threw the remote!,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Next Chapter:** Untitled (Summary: This is pointless because I have an idea but I haven't collaborated with Jordan yet…)


	25. Winter Blunderland

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… Alright, I stand corrected: This is the shortest disclaimer we've ever had…**

**Author's Notes- **In accordance to the unprecedented snowfall Jordan and I's place has received, and also that it's December, this chapter will have a special theme! Amazing, considering it doesn't snow here that often…

_**Author's Notes- **__So I hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas! Also, consider this our late Christmas Present to you.... If you don't celebrate Christmas: I'm sorry, and hope you had a Happy "Insert Holiday here!" ........ (Smiley Face)_

xXx

Early in the morning at the Clubhouse…

Beep! Beep! Beep! (Alarm Clock)  
(Jordan reaches her hands out of a pile of covers to chuck the alarm clock at the wall. She slowly sits up.)  
Jordan: (Yawns) Man, it's bright outside this morning. (Goes over to the window and moves the curtains. When she looks outside she's suddenly completely awake.) (Gasps) Oh my Suzaku!!

Meanwhile…

Ashleigh: (Curled up in a little ball in her bed)  
Jordan: (Suddenly bursts into the room and leaps onto her) Ash!! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!  
Ashleigh: (Jolted awake with her accent) What the bloody hell are you doing!?!  
Jordan: Look outside! Go look! Now!  
Ashleigh: (Trying to kick her away) No! Just let me bloody sleep!  
Jordan: Nope! Sorry! (Drags her out of bed and to the window)  
Ashleigh: Remind me to kick your arse when I wake up comp- (When she looks out the window her accent disappears) Holy Suzaku!! When did this happen!?!  
Jordan: Last night, obviously! I just text the Pres and she said that classes were canceled!  
Ashleigh: Well, since you've already woken me up- what are we waiting for!?  
(The two split up to wake everyone else)

Jordan: (Bursts into Lelouch's room and shakes C.C. awake) C.C.! C.C. common!  
C.C.: What-?  
Jordan: (Drags her out of the room) Common! We're going to make Cheese-Kun sculptures!  
C.C.: Uh, okay?  
Lelouch: (Woken up from all of the commotion) What just happened?  
Meanwhile…  
Ashleigh: (Beats on Suzaku's door) Hey, Suzy! Come out here! You'll never believe it!  
Suzaku: (Opens the door) (Sleepily) … What is it? Do you know what time it is?  
Ashleigh: It's amazing! I know it's December and all, but it's so hot outside the clouds melted!  
Suzaku: What!? (Runs downstairs and outside to jump in a giant pile of white powder… Note that he's in his Pjs: A T-shirt and shorts.)  
Ashleigh: (Follows him down the stairs and collapses in laughter by the door.)  
Jordan: (Runs downstairs) Ash, what did you do!?  
Suzaku: (Walks back inside, covered in snow, shivering) That's not funny.  
(At this point, Jordan dies laughing too)

_Lelouch: (Walking downstairs) You should have known better, Suzaku.  
Suzaku: Just shut up and get me something warm!  
(At that moment the two turn around to see Jordan and Ashleigh riding a sled down the staircase in full-on snow gear.)  
Suzaku: (Running to get out of their way) How did they change that fast!?  
Lelouch: (So stunned by this, just stands there and practically gets run over by them.)  
C.C.: A good question but better still: Where did they get a sled?  
Milly: (Peaks through the door) Lelouch, what are you doing lying on the ground? Get up and go get dressed!  
Lelouch: (Going back up the stairs) I'll murder them.  
Suzaku: (Looks out the window to see Jordan and Ashleigh hooking up a tube to the back of Rivalz's scooter.) I've got to try this.  
(Suzaku and C.C. go upstairs and get dressed too.)  
Meanwhile, outside…  
Ashleigh: No way am I getting on that tube!  
Jordan: Come on Ash! I'm not driving this time and it's snow, not water! It's not like tubing on the lake!  
Ashleigh: Yeah well, you know what I always say: "Tubing opens up the gates of hell." And I don't want to risk melting the snow. (Shoves Rivalz aside) I'm driving.  
(After C.C., Suzaku, and Lelouch all get downstairs…)  
C.C.: Lelouch, why is snow white?_

Lelouch: (Without missing a beat) Because it's forgotten what colour it's supposed to be.  
C.C.: (Pause) But…  
Suzaku: Is that some kind of inside joke?  
Lelouch: This is the third time she's asked me that.  
C.C: (Pouts, then goes to build a snowman)  
Suzaku: Anyway, where did they go on Rivalz's scooter? I wanted to ride on the-  
Jordan: (Riding on the tube, hits a jump and flies off of the tube and towards Suzaku) Look out Pretty Green Eyes!!  
Suzaku: Holy me! (Tries to scramble out of the way but both he and Jordan go into the snow- making a 'Pouf!' noise.)  
Jordan: (Pops out of the snow) That was epic!  
Lelouch: Is Suzaku under there somewhere?  
Jordan: I dunno, lemme see. (Reaches under the snow) (Pulls up a disoriented and snow-covered Suzaku) Found him!  
Suzaku: Hey Lelouch, did you get the license plate number…?  
Lelouch: Maybe next time.  
Ashleigh: (Rides up on the scooter) Holy Suzaku, Jordan! You decked him!  
Jordan: Yeah, maybe we made the snow-ramp too high?  
Ashleigh: Nah. So Suzy, you want a ride?  
Suzaku: (Leaps up) Do you even have to ask!?

_Jordan: Wait! I have an idea to make this better! (Runs off)  
(After a while Jordan reappears with the Lancelot.)  
Ashleigh: Oh, I get it now. (She starts to hook the tube up to the Lancelot.)  
Suzaku__: Fine Jordan, just this once… I will allow this.  
Milly: Mainly because he really wants to ride it.  
Rivalz: Hang on Suzaku, I'm gonna ride with you.  
Ashleigh: Uh oh, that means Jordan's driving.  
C.C.: What's wrong with that?  
Ashleigh: Well, her goal is to throw people off the tube… as violently and as many times as she can.  
Lelouch: Yeah, I'm going to enjoy watching this. (Sits in a lawn chair with a cup of hot chocolate.)  
Milly: (Pulls a video camera out from her Mallet Space.)  
Ashleigh: (Starts to build a penguin out of snow…)  
Jordan: (Over the Lancelot's intercom system) You guys ready?  
Suzaku & Rivalz: Yes!  
Jordan: Hang on!  
(Jordan throws it into 2nd gear- so they start off doing about 25 mph)  
Suzaku: Aw, I thought it would be more fun than this.  
Rivalz: (Thinking) This is a nice, leisurely pace…  
Jordan: (Thinking) Okay, now time to make them cry. Hmm… Oh! I remember this button! (She presses the shiny, red hyper-speed button from chapter one.)  
Rivalz: OH SHI-  
Suzaku: Yeah!!  
(The tube flies up into the air, does a full 360 and lands back on the ground.)  
(Amazingly, both Rivalz and Suzaku are still hanging on.)  
Milly: Did you see that!?! I'm calling Kallen! (Calls Kallen)  
Ashleigh: (Looks up from a pile of snow) Maybe I should start building them snow-gravestones.  
(Jordan- irritated that it didn't throw at least one of them off- takes a very sharp curve.)  
(The tube flips to its side in the air. Suzaku, being the heavier one, weighs it down on his side, causing Rivalz to go flying through the air and into a tree. When he hits the trunk of the tree he's thrown back to the ground on his butt.)_

Suzaku: (Dies laughing) (He moves to the center of the tube so he doesn't fall off)  
Jordan: (Looks back to just Suzaku on the tube) Yes!! Now time to get serious!  
(The Lancelot rushes by the group again. Rivalz is still sitting dazedly by the tree.)  
Ashleigh: (Places a headstone made of snow beside Rivalz)  
Rivalz: Hey, that's not funny!  
Milly: (Makes a snow-angel)  
C.C.: (Puts a snow-hat on top of a snow-blob) Finished.  
Lelouch: And what is that supposed to be?  
C.C.: It's Cheese-Kun. Do you need glasses?  
Ashleigh: Probably, but C.C., I think he needs a face.  
C.C.: (Gets up to find a suitable face)  
Meanwhile…  
Jordan: (Whips the Lancelot a certain way so the tube goes hurdling towards the snow-ramp)  
Suzaku: (Holds on for dear life)  
(When Jordan looks back to see if Suzaku's fallen off yet, she sees him riding on the tube, which is now completely sideways, mid-air.)  
Jordan: (Starts doing doughnuts) I'm going to throw you off if it's the last thing I do!!  
Meanwhile again…  
Kallen: (Walks up to the group) What have I missed?  
Milly: Well, Rivalz was just thrown into a tree, and Jordan is still trying to throw Suzaku.  
Ashleigh: (Still making snow sculptures) He's being very tenacious about it.  
C.C.: Quite literally. (Places a few twigs on the Snow-Cheese-Kun)  
Kallen: Wow, sorry I missed Rivalz being hurdled into a tree.  
Ashleigh: (Examines her snow sculpture) Hmm… Finished!  
Lelouch: (Turns around) And what will yours be? Some sort of- (Pause) Is that Suzaku?  
Ashleigh: I call it a Snow-zaku, but yes.

_Milly: And where is the sculpture of me? I'm more important than Suzaku!  
Rivalz: (Perks up) I'll make it Madam Pres! (Salutes and gets to work) You can count on me!  
(Meanwhile…)  
Jordan: Let's see how you deal with this!  
(She turns the Lancelot around in a physics-defying U-Turn so the tube is completely yanked out from under Suzaku. He falls face first into the snow.)  
Suzaku: That's not fair!!  
Ashleigh: Hey Jordan! We decided to have a snowball fight!  
Jordan: (Jumps out of the Lancelot) Whose team am I on?  
Milly: Jordan and Suzaku will be on my team.  
Lelouch: So I have Kallen and Ashleigh on mine?  
Kallen: Wait. What about Rivalz?  
Ashleigh: He said something about finishing his statue...  
Jordan: Who cares! Now to build our forts!!  
(After a while…)  
Kallen: Good, good… Lelouch, pat down that wall some more.  
Ashleigh: Hmn, I wonder how the other team's fort is looking…  
Kallen: Not sure.  
Lelouch: Knowing them, it can't be any worse than our four-walled fort.  
Kallen: Are you making fun of my plans!?  
Lelouch: It doesn't have a ceiling.  
Ashleigh: Yeah, well… I'm just gonna go check out the other fort.  
(She walks around the other side of the Clubhouse to find a three-story snow castle!)  
(Suzaku is standing on the outside patting down the wall.)  
Suzaku: (Spots her) Jordan! Ashleigh's here!  
Jordan: (On the ramparts) Well hurry and get inside before she hits you with a __snowball, smarty__!  
(Suzaku runs around the castle a good two times before...)  
Suzaku: Jordan, didn't I tell you to build a door?!  
Jordan: Oh right…Hang on. (She disappears behind the wall.)  
(A drawbridge lowers)  
Ashleigh: That's it! I'm changing sides!_

Suzaku: (Scrambles inside and closes the drawbridge)  
Jordan: (Reappears back on the ramparts) No way! You can't change sides now! It's too late!  
Ashleigh: Jordan, if you expect me to make you a Cheese-Chan for your birthday, you WILL lower this door.  
Jordan: (Dives behind the wall again) Okie dokie!  
(The drawbridge lowers)  
Meanwhile…  
Kallen: Man, she really is taking a while, huh?  
Lelouch: Something tells me we've lost a teammate.  
Kallen: No, she wouldn't do that… Would she?  
Rivalz: (Suddenly pops up) Hey guys! I finished my snow-sculpture of the Pres!  
(He shows them what looks like thin, but somehow heavier at the top, snowman wearing a blonde wig.)  
Rivalz: Eh? Eh? What do you think?  
Lelouch: (Speechless)  
Kallen: … Don't quit your day job, Rivalz….  
(Suddenly, a huge cannonball-sized snowball hurdles down from the sky. It explodes in a cloud of snow- also destroying Rivalz's "statue".)  
Rivalz: (Thrown to the ground) What the heck was that!?!  
Kallen: To the shelter! (Dives into the fort, then looks at Lelouch, who just stands there.) What are you doing?!  
Lelouch: (Points up) There's no ceiling.  
Meanwhile…  
Milly: (Piling snow together to make the snow-cannonballs)  
Suzaku: (Loading the snow-cannonballs into a snow-cannon)  
Jordan: (Firing the snow-cannon)  
Ashleigh: I WILL figure out how this is even possible! I will! But for right now, we should just go with it.  
Jordan: Hey, that's what I'm doing.

_(On the other side…)  
Lelouch: What the hell are they using, a cannon?!  
Kallen: Just keep throwing! I'll be back in a minute! (Runs off)  
(A minute later...)  
(Kallen shows up with the Guren.)  
Lelouch: Now that's plenty power.  
(Kallen picks up a __snowball__ with the Guren and fires.)__(Giant snowball falls!!)  
Ashleigh: No Fair!  
Jordan: Yeah! We should be able to use the Lancelot!  
Milly: Stop whining and keep firing! (Yelling from her throne made of ice)  
Suzaku: When did she have time to make that?  
Jordan: __Pretty Green Eyes__ look out!  
(A snowball suddenly comes roaring in through the open window and slams right into the side of Suzaku's face.)  
Suzaku: Oww…!!_

Jordan: You okay, Pretty Green Eyes?  
Ashleigh: Jordan, if he can take riding on the tube with you driving like a maniac, he can take anything.  
Suzaku: That's it. Now it's personal.  
(A few moments later)  
Suzaku: (Rides up in the Lancelot) Alright! You two! (Points at Jordan and Ashleigh) Start stuffing snow into the Hadron Cannon!!  
Jordan: (Salutes and gets to work) Hai-Hai, Pretty Green Eyes!  
Ashleigh: But wouldn't the Hadron Cannon… melt… the snow when you fire?  
Suzaku: (Pause) We have a cannon made out of snow. A freaking CANNON. Made out of SNOW. Do you really need to ask?!  
Ashleigh: Yeah, you're right. (Gathers the snow)  
(Meanwhile…)  
Kallen: (Busy creating giant snowballs and throwing them over the Clubhouse in the Guren)  
Rivalz: (Cowering)  
Lelouch: (Just sitting there)  
Kallen: (Throws another snowball) You know, Lelouch, you could help a little!  
Lelouch: You seem to have a good handle on it.  
Kallen: (Mutters something and makes another snowball- accidentally scooping up Rivalz and packing him into the projectile.)  
Lelouch: Ah, Kallen- (Kallen tosses the snowball) … Oh, forget it.

_(On the other side….)  
Ashleigh: Hey… do you guys hear something?  
Milly: No I- (Looks up) Incoming Rivalz in a __snowball__!  
(They all look out the window to see a giant snowball with little blue hairs and two feet hanging out of it.)  
(Unfortunately, Kallen's aim wasn't the best, so the snowball slams right into the wall, next to the window.)  
Jordan: Whew, at least he didn't hit any of us.  
Suzaku: Poor Rivalz. He keeps getting hurt today.  
Milly: Maybe we should let him in. He'll be safe in here.  
Ashleigh: (Grabs some rope) Time to capture the enemy!  
(On the other side….)  
Kallen: Hey Lelouch, where did Rivalz go?  
Lelouch: Oh, you crammed him into one of the last __snowballs__ you threw.  
Kallen: What!?  
Lelouch: Yeah, sent him right to the other side. (Makes a swooping motion with his arm)  
Milly: (With a loudspeaker) Attention Kallen and Lelouch: We have captured your teammate! Give up now and you may have him back alive!  
Suzaku: Alive?  
Jordan: Does that mean we're gonna kill him if they don't give up?  
Ashleigh: I think that might be a little harsh… even for Rivalz._

Rivalz: (Explaining his sculpture to Milly) … and it was so realistic, Pres. You would've loved it. But a snowball…  
Milly: (Pats Rivalz's shoulder) I know Rival, I know.  
Rivalz: So guys… when are you going to untie me?  
Ashleigh: Eh, probably never.  
Jordan: Yeah, that sounds about right.  
Suzaku: It's taking them a while to respond isn't it?  
Kallen: (Over her loudspeaker) Uh… you guys remember that Rivalz isn't our teammate, right?  
Milly: (Pause) (Loudspeaker) So, whose team is he on?  
Kallen: (Loudspeaker!) No one's… he just… wasn't on a team…  
Rivalz: Yeah, I was working on my sculpture of Madame President.  
Milly and her team: (Pause)  
(Meanwhile, with the other team…)  
Lelouch: Good thing you threw Rivalz then, instead of me.  
Kallen: Yeah well… If you start helping a little more then maybe I won't have to.  
(A giant snowball suddenly comes hurdling towards the two. They take cover.)  
Kallen: We ruined their negotiations so they attack!?  
Lelouch: Seems like it.  
(When the snow settles…)  
Rivalz: (Pops out of the snow-rubble) Hey guys! How's it goin'?

_Kallen: Damn, they sent him back.  
Lelouch: Now what?  
(Suddenly they hear a faint whistling sound…)  
(It gets louder….)  
Lelouch: What is that?  
(It gets even louder... Then: Boom!!)  
(The other team threw a snowball so huge it took down two of the fort's walls.)  
Kallen: What the hell!?  
Lelouch: (Says something from under the snow he's buried in.)  
Kallen: What?  
Lelouch: (Pops out of the snow) Kill them. All of them. Now!  
Kallen: Lelouch. They knocked down two of our walls! We only had four!  
Lelouch: … Call the Black Knights!  
Kallen: Well alright... (Dials Ohgi) Ohgi, it's Kallen. Zero has a mission for you... Yes, I know there's about eight inches of snow... Okay then. Forget it. (Hangs up)  
Lelouch: Well?  
Kallen: Ohgi says there's too much snow. No one can move.  
Lelouch: Damn, I never get used to surrendering.  
Kallen: Here, this should help. (Hands him a small white flag.)_

Lelouch: (Examines it) You carry these around with you?  
Kallen: (Pulls a giant white flag from her Mallet-Space- that she just recently discovered.) Just in case. You have to be prepared, you know!  
(Meanwhile…)  
Suzaku: (Jumps up and down) Look! They're waving a white flag! We won!  
Jordan: (Acts like she's waving a flag) Basa-basa! Basa-basa!  
Milly: Alright! Time to go reap the spoils of war!  
(Everyone leaves the castle and runs to the other side of the Clubhouse. They find the remnants of the enemy fort deserted.)  
Suzaku: (Lifts up a slab of snow) Where'd they go?  
Jordan: Oh, no! Not again! Lulu's used his powers of disappearing to take Kallen with him!  
Ashleigh: Don't forget Rivalz.  
Jordan: Who?  
Milly: Ha! That's nothing! We found out about his hiding place about four chapters ago, didn't we?  
Suzaku: (Points) To the Clubhouse!  
Milly: Hey, that's my line!  
(Everyone runs inside. No one's around.)  
Jordan: What?! But this is where he goes when he disappears!  
Ashleigh: Well, it is a bit obvious, don't you think?  
Milly: (Nods) Too obvious…  
Suzaku: (Points) Back outside!  
Jordan: Yeah right! Too cold out there. Jordan need food first.  
(She walks to the kitchen. Lelouch, Rivalz, Kallen, and Nunnally are sitting at the table with hot cocoa. Jordan doesn't notice.)  
Nunnally: Hello there.  
Jordan: (Waves) Hi Nunnally!  
Nunnally: Would you like some cocoa?  
Jordan: Sure! (She sits down with them and takes a sip of her cocoa before….) Holy! What are you guys doing here!?  
Kallen: Took a while for you to notice.  
Ashleigh: (Suddenly standing in the doorway) Well, when Jordan gets hungry the only thing on her mind is food.  
Jordan: (Nods) This is chapter twenty-five. Surely we've established this by now?

_C.C.: I'm surprised that with how much she eats she's not three hundred pounds by now.  
Ashleigh: You're one to talk. It's from all the dancing she does.  
Jordan: Which I need to practice... Milly is there a pond anywhere around here?  
Milly: No, but we do have the outdoor pool…  
Jordan: Perfect! Everyone get some skates! We're going ice-skating!  
Suzaku: (Jumps up) Alright!  
Ashleigh: Should we trust him attaching blades to his feet? What with that dangerous spin-kick of his?  
Lelouch: Probably not.  
C.C.: You just don't want to go because you can't skate.  
Kallen: Oh, we're definitely going now!  
Rivalz: B-but I can't ice-skate… Why don't you just go without me?__  
Milly: Okay then!  
(They all grab some skates from… somewhere and head out to the pool- that is now iced over.)  
(Of course everyone gets out on the ice except for Lelouch.)_

Jordan: (Does a bunch of twirls and other spinny stuff) What's the matter Lulu?  
Lelouch: It's nothing.  
Suzaku: (Spinning in circles) Common, Lelouch. It's not that difficult.  
C.C.: (Doing figure-eights) It probably is for him.  
Suzaku: And you have all of us to teach you if you don't know how.  
Kallen: Yeah, get on the ice. I want to see you fall and bust your-  
Suzaku: (Cuts her off) Don't say that, then he'll never try.  
Ashleigh: I dunno... I'm with Kallen on this one. I'd love to see that.  
Milly: Me three!  
Lelouch: (Sighs) (Casually skates across the pool to the other side) I said it was nothing. As you can see, I can skate perfectly fine.  
Suzaku: Then what's the problem?  
Lelouch: (Thinks for a moment, then skates straight over to Suzaku and shoves him- knocking him off of his feet.)  
Suzaku: (Falls towards the side of the pool where the ice is a slightly different colour…. And falls right through it.)  
Jordan: … Oh.  
Everyone: (Gets off of the ice as fast as possible)  
Suzaku: (Splashes back to the surface) Hey! Isn't anyone g-going t-to help me!?

Later… At the Clubhouse…

(Everyone's sitting in the main room in front of a roaring fire.)  
Suzaku: (Sitting on the couch in front of the fireplace, wrapped up in five blankets and shivering.)  
Milly: (Walks in with a steaming mug) Here's some cocoa for you, Suzaku.  
Suzaku: Th-th-thanks… M-Madam… P-Pr-President.  
Kallen: (On the couch with Suzaku) I still don't see why you couldn't have just told him.  
Milly: Really, Lelouch. What were you thinking?  
Lelouch: (Shrugs) Who knows?  
Suzaku: S-seriously! I could've d-died!  
Jordan: (Waves her hand at him) Nah! You're God, remember?  
Ashleigh: And even I've got to give Lulu kudos for acting on such a brutal, spur-of-the-moment impulse.  
Jordan: Besides, it wasn't that bad.  
Suzaku: You had to f-fish me out w-with a g-g-garden hose attached to R-R-Rivalz's s-sc-scooter!  
Ashleigh: We couldn't find a life preserver! What can ya do?  
Nunnally: Well, at least you're alright now.  
Suzaku: I g-guess. Achoo! (Sneeze, obviously) Dammit, now I've got a cold. Thanks a bunch, Lelouch.  
Lelouch: No problem.  
Ashleigh: Hmn… I do believe I've found a setup for the next chapter, Jordan!  
Jordan: Leave that for later. This one's too long! End it now.

Owari!!

XxX

**Author's Notes-** Sure, sure. I know this is terribly late and everything, but what can you expect? It's the Holidays! And as Jordan said, consider this a belated present from the two of us. By the way, we came up with the snow-castle bit whilst taking a break from Christmas Shopping at Chik-Fil-A!

But anyway, as a subtle, subtle reference to my recent Hetalia obsession- that's spread to Jordan, among others- in this chapter she says, "Basa-basa!" which is Japanese onomatopoeia for, "Flap-flap." A.k.a.: The sound of waving a flag!

_**Author's Notes-** Yeah.... Not much to say here... Have a Happy New Year! See you in 2010! Let's see if I can catch Ash falling again this New Year's Party!_

**Hahaha don't count on it,**

_**-Destiny**_

Next Chapter: You just saw it!


	26. Sneezaku

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Nyquil… or Skittles...  
**

**Author's Notes- **I believe that Jordan and I can hold equal blame for our absence… but maybe I have a little more? My Ethernet cable decided to stop working mid-January, and we've taken longer than usual just to write the freaking thing. Not to mention the rapid-fire blizzards! But what can you do? I can't speak for Jordan, but I've been busy…. watching the Olympics… and other stuff… Yep.

_**Author's Notes- **__Not really sure what to say here except sorry we've been lazy again… It has become a really bad habit of ours._

xXx

_(2 'o clock… in the morning…)_

_(Suzaku is up and about. Stumbling from door to door. Slamming into walls and falling over chairs and tables.)  
Ashleigh: AHH! This is worse than the snoring Chihuahua!  
(Jordan walks in the door)  
Jordan: Ash, I think I heard something…  
Ashleigh: Well you haven't gone crazy, because I know I hear something!  
(They walk out into the hallway)  
Jordan: Ashleigh!  
Ashleigh: What?  
Jordan: I see a figure over there! (She points to a silhouette by the window.)  
Ashleigh: (Mumbling while walking over to the window) Don't you criminals know anything!? Never stand near a window where I can push you out of it!!  
Lelouch: Hey! Hey! It's me!  
Jordan: Lulu! Did the noise wake you up too?  
Ashleigh: Man, and I came this close to getting rid of him!  
C.C.: (Pops out from behind the curtains.) That's a very difficult task to accomplish.  
Lelouch: I think the noise was coming from downstairs.  
Ashleigh: Then why don't you go check it out?  
Lelouch: Well, it's not like I'm afraid or anything. I just don't want to waste time on it.  
Jordan: Come on Lulu! Go check it out! (She gently shoves him down the stairs.)  
(When Lelouch lands at the bottom the kitchen light turns on.)  
Lelouch: Who… Who's there?  
(A loud coughing and a slight sneeze come from the kitchen.)  
C.C.: Well who is it?  
Lelouch: I'm not sure, but the intruder has a cold.  
Ashleigh: That's it! I'm losing important sleep here!  
(Ashleigh storms down the stairs and bursts into the kitchen.)  
Ashleigh: Calm down, everyone. It's just Suzaku._

Jordan: Jeez, Pretty Green Eyes! You almost gave me a heart attack!  
Lelouch: What are you doing down here anyway?  
Suzaku: (Has a blanket draped over his shoulders) Oh I was… looking for some… ACHOO!! (Loud sneeze!!)  
Ashleigh: Aiyah! Give us a little bit of a warning!  
Suzaku: (Sniffles)  
C.C.: It seems he has a cold.  
Lelouch: And now everyone has a firm grasp of the obvious.  
Jordan: Aw, poor Pretty Green Eyes… (Pats his head)  
Suzaku: Thanks Jordan…. But please don't do that, my head hurts…  
Jordan: Alrighty. Say Ash, I think this means we get to use some more home remedies.  
Ashleigh: My exact thoughts as well, Jordan!  
Suzaku: Whoa, Whoa! Hold on! You mean like that time with the skunk smell?!  
Ashleigh: Yep.  
Suzaku: That wasn't treatment- it was torture! (Cough) There's no way I'm going to- (Goes into a coughing fit)  
Ashleigh: Hmn… I don't hear any signs of protest… Do you, Jordan?  
Jordan: Nope!  
Lelouch: And that's good enough for you.  
Jordan: Hey, it's not exactly like the skunk incident. This time we actually know what we're talking about.  
Suzaku: You mean you- (Cough) Did all of that stuff- (Coughcough) Without knowing what you were doing!?  
Ashleigh: Well, there's nothing we can do about it now.  
Suzaku: No. Lelouch, you can't let them do this to me!  
Lelouch: (Shrug) I'd intervene… if only I didn't find the last round of experiments so entertaining.  
Suzaku: But I-!  
Jordan: Okay! Lulu, C.C.! We're going to need lots and lots of Chicken Noodle Soup!  
Lelouch: You realize it's two in the morning, don't you-?  
C.C.: Condensed?  
Jordan: Uh… Sure.  
(C.C. goes off in search of soup)

_Jordan: (Goes to the stove and starts boiling water) Now was it "feed a cold and starve a fever"...or the other way around?  
Ashleigh: I have no idea. Does anyone else know?  
Lelouch: Does he even have a fever?  
Ashleigh: I guess we'll have to check that too.  
Jordan: Alright, who's got a thermometer?  
(Crickets)  
Lelouch: … I'll call the president.  
C.C.: (Carrying in grocery bags full of soup) What, does she keep a random stockpile of thermometers at her house?  
Lelouch: No... but she can get into the Nurse's Office and get what we need.  
Suzaku: (Half asleep on the table) Didn't anyone notice (cough) That C.C. walked in (sneeze) carrying chicken soup?  
(A few moments later…)  
Milly: Hello! Is anyone here? Why is it so dark?  
Kallen: They're in the kitchen, I can see the light on. But seriously Madame Pres, calling me so early in the morning to help you steal from the Nurse?  
Milly: It's not stealing, it's for a good cause! Now put on your mask, you don't wanna get sick as well!  
(Milly dresses up in doctors mask and gloves)  
Jordan: Milly… isn't that a bit extreme?  
Milly: Not at all. In fact, I brought gloves and masks for everyone!_

Jordan: (Suits up!)  
Ashleigh: Eh… Just a mask for me. I don't plan on touching him.  
Lelouch: (Rolls his eyes) It's just a simple cold.  
C.C.: (Rolls a comically gigantic-sized can of Chicken Noodle Soup through the door) Why don't you just make Suzaku wear the mask?  
Suzaku: (Sneezes)  
Ashleigh: Good idea…  
Jordan: But I have to take his temperature first! (Shoves a thermometer in Suzaku's mouth)  
Suzaku: (Makes choking sounds)  
Jordan: Now, now, Pretty Green Eyes, no talking!  
Kallen: (Rummaging through the Medicine Cabinet) Do you guys have any cold medicine?  
Lelouch: I'm not sure. We might have some Nyquil somewhere in there.  
Suzaku: (Shakes his head no; terrified) (Muffled something)  
Jordan: (Whacks him in the back of the head) I said no talking! (A few seconds later…) Okay done!  
(She takes the thermometer out and reads it)  
Jordan: (Laughs)  
C.C.: What's so funny?  
Jordan: This isn't a thermometer.  
Ashleigh: (Facepalm) Fantastic. (Puts one hand on Suzaku's forehead and the other on hers)  
Suzaku: (Shivers) You're hands are cold!  
Jordan: She's a cold-blooded monster!  
Ashleigh: Seems like you have a fever, Suzy.

_Kallen: Jordan, what exactly did you use if it wasn't a thermometer?  
Jordan: It was one of those swab things you use to check for strep throat.  
Milly: I'll take that. (Grabs swab off table) You can never be to sure. I'll be going to the chemistry room now!  
Ashleigh: Alright C.C., now I'm gonna need a huge tub.  
Lelouch: What's it for?  
Ashleigh: You'll see. Kallen, get me a ladder and meet me in the backyard with the tub. Jordan, look after Suzaku.  
Jordan: Alrighty. Come on __Pretty Green Eyes__, time to get your bathing suit on!  
Kallen: Shouldn't he stay wrapped up?  
Jordan: Not for the home cure I'm trying! Taking a nice hot bath in green tea!  
Ashleigh: Hey! You're not wasting all my tea!  
Jordan: Fine! I'll just use honey.  
(Jordan drags him upstairs while the rest get to work.)  
(About one honey bath, three cold rags to the head, and a needle to draw blood [Milly again] later… Jordan leads Suzaku outside for Ashleigh's home remedy.)  
(They walk outside to see a pool-sized bowl full of chicken noodle soup.)  
Suzaku: Great. What is that?  
Ashleigh: You're going to bathe in this.  
Lelouch: And you're going to enjoy it too! Do you know how long it took me to warm this up with just a blow dryer!?_

Ashleigh: Well, how else were you going to do it? Do you have a giant stove anywhere? Didn't think so.  
Suzaku: Can I at least eat it?  
Jordan: No I don't think that's a good idea… It's "Starve a cold, drown a fever" … Right?  
Kallen: I thought it was "Stave a cold, drown the flu."  
Milly: Oh, those are just old wives' tales!  
Lelouch: It's "Starve a fever, drown a cold," and I don't think we should be relying on medieval expertise for this.  
C.C.: Why do you know that?  
Ashleigh: Whatever. Just get in the damn soup.  
Suzaku: (Sneeze) You don't have to tell me twice.  
(He gets in the soup)  
Suzaku: Does anyone have a giant spoon?  
Kallen: You're enjoying this way too much.  
Suzaku: (Shrug) Must be the fever.

_(After 30 minutes or so…)  
Suzaku: Hey guys… This is getting kind of cold… (Sneeze)  
Kallen: I think I might have a better idea... Jordan, get me some chocolate packets. (She runs in the house.)  
Ashleigh: Wow, now Kallen is plotting with us?  
(When Kallen and Jordan return they all take Suzaku into the house.)  
(Okay, mostly the girls make Lelouch carry/drag Suzaku into the house.)  
Lelouch: No way am I carrying him up the stairs!  
Jordan: Come on, Lulu!  
Ashleigh: Be a man!  
Lelouch: I am a man!  
Kallen: (Snicker)  
Lelouch: Fine. (He lugs Suzaku up into the bathroom and throws him in a tub full of scalding hot chocolate.)  
Suzaku: (Yelps and jumps out of the tub.) Hot! Hot!!  
Ashleigh: Well, duh.  
Jordan: Just get in __Pretty Green Eyes.__ It will warm you up.  
Milly: (Bursts in the door) So as it turns out, you don't have strep throat. ...What smells like hot chocolate?  
Kallen: Suzaku's remedy bath number three.  
Milly: (Takes a cup out of nowhere and dips it in the bath.) (Takes a sip) Not bad. Needs some nutmeg._

Kallen: So, get in!  
Suzaku: (Ponders a moment…) Wait! (Runs downstairs and returns with a crazy-straw) Perfect.  
(He gets in the chocolate)  
Suzaku: How long are you going to leave me in here?  
Jordan: Mmm…. I say for twenty minutes at least.  
Lelouch: Hold on a second: If he's able to run downstairs for a straw, why did I have to drag him up here in the first place!?  
Kallen: Uh…  
C.C.: (Walking by the bathroom door) We wanted to see if you could do it.  
Jordan: Works for me!  
Ashleigh: Alright Suzy, you stay here and marinate a bit. I've got another idea.  
Suzaku: (Look up from his crazy-straw) Does it involve submerging me in any random household liquids?  
Ashleigh: Nope.  
Suzaku: (Thumbs-up) Then I'm for it.  
Kallen: You might regret saying that…  
(Thirty minutes later…)  
Ashleigh: (Returns with a steaming teacup and hands it to him) Here you go!  
Suzaku: (Examines it) What is it…?  
Ashleigh: Tea. I made a whole batch! So there's more if you want it.  
Kallen: What kind of tea?  
Ashleigh: Russian Tea.  
Jordan: (Pause) … HOW Russian?  
Ashleigh: About half a bottle of vodka's worth of… Russian… (Suddenly grabs the cup from him and downs it) … Now that you mention it…  
Jordan: Right. No vodka for Pretty Green Eyes.  
Lelouch: Did we ever learn that the hard way.  
Ashleigh: (Going back downstairs) I'll just go make a LESS Russian batch…  
Jordan: Try Russian FREE!!

_(After Ashleigh makes a new batch of tea, Suzaku is out of the coco bath and all bundled up…)  
(Jordan makes a phone call)  
Jordan: Uh huh... Honey and mint tea leaves with a teaspoon of alcohol… and eucalyptus? Got it. Thanks Momma Donna!  
Ashleigh: Let me guess. Vapor Rub?  
Jordan: Yep. We have to rub it over him.  
Kallen: Milly, I think we'll need more of those gloves…  
Lelouch: You can count me out of this experiment.  
Ashleigh: No way Lelouch, you have to get us some kind of steam room.  
Milly: Why not just use the teachers' spa room.  
Jordan: Teachers have a spa room?  
Kallen: Wow.  
Ashleigh: Why are they in class teaching then? I'd be spending my time in there.  
(They make the vapor and drag Suzaku to the Teacher's Spa Room.)  
(They peak into the room to find massage tables, massaging oils, sauna, fruit juice bar, and hot tub.)  
Milly: I'm running the fruit juice bar!  
Lelouch: Good I want a pineapple smoothie. (He lies down on a huge comfy couch.)  
Jordan: Will you get your butt up! We have to put this junk on Suzaku! (She puts down the bucket she's carrying.)  
(They all rub the vapor on Suzaku and shove him in the sauna.)  
Ashleigh: How long is he supposed to be in there?  
Jordan: Until the vapor melts off him?  
Kallen: Well, that should take a while… Milly, banana smoothie over here!  
(After an hour or two...)  
(Suzaku bursts out of the sauna.)  
Suzaku: Jesus, it's hot in there! ... What are you guys doing?  
(He looks around to see everyone lounging around drinking smoothies.)  
Milly: Oops, it seams we forgot about him._

Suzaku: How could you forget about me?! And where's my smoothie!?!  
Ashleigh: Look on the bright side, Suzy. At least you got a taste of Finnish culture!  
Suzaku: Yeah, but-!  
Jordan: And I bet you lost at least ten pounds in there!  
Suzaku: Maybe, but still-!  
Milly: What kind of smoothie do you want, Suzaku?  
Suzaku: … Mango….  
Milly: (Makes Suzaku's smoothie) Here ya go!  
Suzaku: Thanks… (Sits on the couch)  
Lelouch: You have to learn when to just give up.  
Suzaku: Really.  
Kallen: (Downing her smoothie) You sound a lot better, Suzaku. Like you've cleared up.  
Suzaku: Now that you mention it, I do feel a little better…  
Ashleigh: I guess our remedies actually worked this time?  
Kallen: (Still guzzling her smoothie) For once… (Pause)  
Milly: What's the matter, Kallen?  
Kallen: … Brain… Freeze…  
Lelouch: Speaking of brain freeze, has anyone seen C.C.?  
Jordan: Nope. I haven't seen her for a while.  
Lelouch: Well, that's not good…  
Suzaku: What's not good about it?  
Lelouch: She's probably casting a curse or some other kind of black magic on you by now.  
Jordan and Ashleigh: Ooh, cool.  
Suzaku: You can't be serious!  
Lelouch: Knowing her… (Suddenly gets the ice bucket from the smoothie bar dumped on his head)  
C.C.: (Holding the bucket and a slice of pizza) I went for pizza, you fool. I'm not a mage.  
Ashleigh: Aw, and I wanted to see C.C. throw holy water on Suzaku screaming "Be gone, Demon!"  
Jordan: But that would kind of be an oxymoron, wouldn't it?

_Suzaku: (Sneezes) Damn!  
Milly: Well, that was only temporary...  
Ashleigh: Great, now he'll just have to do that 20 times a day and he'll be alright.  
Kallen: I don't think we have that much vapor rub.  
Jordan: Alright, hang on and let me make another phone call.  
(45 minutes later…)  
Jordan: Yes Grandma, I love you too. No..... Yes... Yes... I don't take looney-pills like you... No.... Thank you.... Grandma! Ugh, Yeah, yeah I got it: Mix onion juice with grandpa's hot sauce… Thank you. (Hangs up)  
Lelouch: Let me guess, I'm in charge of the onions?  
Ashleigh: No way! I get those. I'm frying them up and eating some fajitas! Suzaku can have the rest.  
Jordan: Good thing I keep Grandpa's special hot sauce in my purse…  
Ashleigh: Why does that not surprise me?  
(Jordan and Ashleigh make the special remedy and serve it in a bowl.)  
Suzaku: (Coughs and gags) This smells horrible!  
C.C.: Just plug your nose and eat it.  
Milly: Here! (She takes a clothespin and clamps his nose shut.)  
Suzaku: Baut theess haurts…  
Ashleigh: Open wide! (She shoves his mouth full of the onions and hot sauce.)  
Jordan: Grandma said this should clear your nose right up!  
Suzaku: Weill, ah cein't tiell…  
(Kallen takes the plug off his nose.)  
Suzaku: (Breathes in) Hey, that does feel much better… but (Coughs!) … I still have that symptom._

Kallen: And I bet that hot sauce didn't help it either.  
Suzaku: Now that you mention it: My tongue is melting. Does anyone have a drink?  
Jordan: (Pours some sauce into the fajitas Ashleigh made) Aw common, it's not that spicy! Besides, spicy is good!  
Ashleigh: (Nods)  
Milly: (Pulls another smoothie out of nowhere and gives it to Suzaku) Well, it's not very good for a sore throat…  
C.C.: (Tastes the hot sauce) (Looks wide-eyed at Jordan) Do you have anymore of this?  
Suzaku: (With his smoothie) Eh, I'll forgive them for clearing my sinuses… (Coughing fit)  
Nunnally: (Enters the room half-way through Suzaku's coughing fit) Suzaku! Is that you doing all that coughing?  
Lelouch: Yeah, Nunnally. It seems Suzaku's caught a cold.  
Kallen: And we've been up since, like two in the morning treating him!  
Milly: We've gotten rid of his sneezing and sniffling, and his fever, but he's still got that stubborn cough.  
Suzaku: (Coughs) (For emphasis!)  
Jordan: Do you have any idea's Nunnally?  
Nunnally: (Ponders a moment) Ah, I know just the thing! Wait here. (She exits the room)  
Suzaku: (Sighs in relief) Since it's Nunnally, I don't have to be afraid…  
C.C.: Watch it be something simple that no one thought of.  
Ashleigh: Don't even think that!  
(A few minutes later…)  
Nunnally: (Returns with a bowl full of ice cream) Here you go, Suzaku!  
Suzaku: (Takes it) Ice cream?  
Nunnally: Cinnamon ice cream!  
Suzaku: (Tries the ice cream) Hey, it's not bad. And you're right my throat feels much better with this!  
Jordan: (Smacks her forehead) Does that count as simple? I'm mad now.  
Ashleigh: I don't know if I'm upset about that, or the fact that we had cinnamon ice cream and I didn't know about it…  
Jordan: Well anyway… Hooray! We've saved Suzaku's life!  
Suzaku: I wasn't going to die!

Owari!!

XxX

**Author's Notes-** It took me forever to figure out how to end this chapter, but I just ended up slashing off a few lines and leaving it.

_**Author's Notes- **Mmm… Hot sauce… Sorry, just woke up and writing this… little hungry…_

**No comment,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Extra:**

Suzaku: (Walking down a generic path…)  
(He looks around… there's no one. He casually pulls out a bag of Skittles and opens it)  
Jordan: (Suddenly comes flying out of a nearby tree and tackles him to the ground. Wailing on him with a golf club)  
Suzaku: (Curls into the fetal position, screaming) Okay! Okay! You can have my Skittles!! Just leave me alone!!!  
Jordan: (Grabs the Skittles and runs)

End.

**Author's Notes- **This skit is courtesy of a very humourous story involving Jordan's boyfriend and a girl from his school. I can't remember if she was mentally ill, or mentally disabled…. But either way, it was hilarious.

**Next Chapter:** Untitled (Summary. Jordan and Ashleigh's true motives are finally revealed??)


	27. Unbearable Us

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Despicable Me… or IHOP...**

**Author's Notes**- …I'm not saying anything….

_**Author's Notes-**__ Thank you 'Laughing Quite Hard Person' for you suggestion: I will take it into consideration for future things... Oh, and thank you Ashleigh for my 18th birthday present! I now have a CHEESE-CHAN!_

xXx

One day… in the Clubhouse…

Lelouch: (Searching under the bed, pulls out the satchel he keeps the cape in and looks into it.) … C.C! (Nothing) C.C.? (Looks around) Where has that girl gone off to now?  
(He stands and goes to the door. When he opens it, C.C. is standing right on the other side with Cheese-Kun and Cheese-Chan under her arm.)  
Lelouch: (Jumps back) Ah! What are you doing!  
C.C.: (Shrugs) Nothing. What do you want?  
Lelouch: (Spots the Cheeses) … First: What is that, and where did you get it?  
C.C.: Oh, this? It's Cheese-Chan. Cheese-Kun's wife. He needed a companion. I finally got enough rewards points for it.  
Lelouch: (Facepalm) Of course…  
C.C.: Is that all?  
Lelouch: No, that's not what I wanted to ask you… I'm heading out for business with the Black Knights, but…  
C.C.: 'But' what? Spit it out.  
Lelouch: You seem awfully agitated.  
C.C.: There's a hot pizza downstairs with my name on it, and if- (Suddenly starts yelling) -Suzaku takes even _one slice _of it I will _personally_ see to his end!  
(A big crash comes from downstairs)  
Lelouch: Right… Anyway, I'm leaving, but nothing is missing. All of the costume is where it should be.  
C.C.: (Sighs) And that bothers you? Something is going right and it bothers you?  
Lelouch: Well usually _those two_ will steal it before a meeting.  
C.C.: I see. That is odd.  
Lelouch: … You have nothing else to say, do you?  
C.C.: (Walks away) Nope.

_Meanwhile, outside the Clubhouse…_

_Jordan: Ash, how are we going to sneak all these things in? (Points to about 3,000 little yellow mumbling things.)  
Ashleigh: Minions. Call them minions.  
Jordan: Okay… how are we going to sneak the minions in?  
Ashleigh: Mmmhh… I suppose I could get a shuttle bus of some sort or maybe a- Quick here comes C.C.! Minions, hide!  
(All the little minions freeze and hide behind various things outside... except the one little retarded one.)  
Jordan: Ashleigh! This one won't hide! He keeps running into my leg!  
Ashleigh: Pick him up and hide him in your coat!  
(Jordan hides him the best she can, but there's still a little bit of yellow poking out.)  
C.C.: (Walks up) What are you doing?  
Ashleigh: Nothing.  
C.C.: Well, Lelouch was looking for the both of you. He's being a bit paranoid. By the way, have you seen Suzaku? There seems to be a pepperoni missing from a slice of my pizza.  
Jordan: Ummm, nope. Can't say I have.  
Ashleigh: Me either.  
C.C.: Hmm... Jordan, is that a little Cheese-Kun under your coat?  
Jordan: Uhhh... maybe?  
Ashleigh: YES! That's exactly what it is!  
C.C.: Interesting. I didn't know they made those. It seems I need to make a call to Stan and complain about this.  
Lelouch: (Suddenly walks into the conversation) So you're on a first-name basis with the pizza guy?  
C.C.: It's important to make a conection with the man who handles your pizza._  
Ashleigh: I could _so_ drive that line into the gutter._  
Lelouch: Right. Jordan. Ashleigh. Hurry up, we're going to be late. (He walks away)  
Ashleigh: … Did he just invite us to a Black Knights Meeting?  
Jordan: You're right, C.C. He is acting strange._

(Jordan and Ashleigh scurry to catch up, with the minions following oh-so discretely behind them.)  
Jordan: (Puts her hand on Lelouch's forehead) Are you feeling okay?  
Lelouch: (Pushes her away) Do you mind? Yes, I feel fine.  
Jordan: Hm, I'm not buying it.  
Ashleigh: Seriously, since when do we get to accompany you without a fight?  
Lelouch: It's unavoidable, isn't it? I don't feel like wasting energy on it anymore.  
Ashleigh: Yeah, but I didn't expect you to buckle this quickly…  
Jordan: Oh well, it'll be much easier to carry out our plans this way!  
Ashleigh: (Shoves Jordan off the sidewalk) Way to be subtle, Jordy.  
Jordan: (As she stumbles off the sidewalk, she tries to avoid stepping on a minion, who is screaming, and lands in a bush.)  
The Bush: Argh! Oh, that hurt…  
Jordan: (Looks around excitedly) A Pirate Bush! Awesome!  
Ashleigh: (Facepalm) Jordan, get up.  
(When she does, Suzaku crawls out of the bush)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: Suzaku!  
Lelouch: What were you doing in there?  
Suzaku: (Looks over his shoulder) C.C. isn't around, is she?  
Ashleigh: No, but she was looking for you.  
Suzaku: I know. (Shudder) I stole a pepperoni from that pizza she ordered.  
Jordan: Are you suicidal?  
Suzaku: No more than usual, but I just couldn't resist! She can't be _that_ dangerous, can she?  
Ashleigh: Well…  
Jordan: Um…  
Lelouch: (Walks away) He's a dead man.  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Follow)  
Suzaku: (Panics) What? Wait! You have to help me!  
(He starts to follow as well, but stops and stares at the wave of yellow minions following the three instead. They mutter gibberish to him and laugh.)  
Suzaku: (Blinks) Okay then.

_(At the secret meeting place of the Black Knights!)  
Ashleigh: Alright, Jordan… Now who do we replace first?  
Jordan: Tamaki.  
Ashleigh: Good thinking! Now go fetch one of the minions!  
(At the secret hiding place of the minions!)  
Jordan: I wonder which one she wants... Mmhh, I'll just take the one with the nice blaster-gun here.  
(She picks up a tiny little yellow figure with one eye, goggles, and overalls.)  
(Meanwhile…)  
Ashleigh: Hey Tamaki!  
Tamaki: What is it!  
Ashleigh: Zero said he wants his super-best friend and whatnot to come and have a drink with him.  
Tamaki__: Now that's the kind of treatment and brave Knight like me deserves! Where is he?  
Ashleigh: (Trying not to gag from what Tamaki just said.) In that huge metal box over in the corner.  
(As Tamaki enters the huge box, Ashleigh shoves him in and locks it.)  
Tamaki: (Muffled) Hey! Why's it dark in here! Where's Zero!  
C.C.: (Walks up) Pathetic little thing, isn't he?  
(Jordan walks in with the minion under her coat again.)  
Jordan: Ash! I got one!  
Ashleigh: (Points to C.C., trying to get Jordan to shut up.)  
C.C.: I don't care to know what's going on. You got rid of Tamaki and that's enough. I have more important things to attend to.  
Ashleigh: That reminds me, we found Suzaku hiding in a bush earlier. What's that about?_

C.C.: Just a little bit of karma.  
Ashleigh: You know, on second thought, don't tell me.  
Jordan: Just don't kill him, okay? He's kind of a main character…  
C.C.: If you insist… (Walks away)  
Tamaki: (Still muffled by the box) I can hear you out there! (Bang-bang) Let me out!  
Jordan: (Kicks the box) Shut up!  
Ashleigh: Okay, now for the plan!  
Jordan: Right! (Grabs the minion from her coat and puts him on the ground)  
Minion: (Speaks gibberish) (Laughs and accidentally fires the blaster gun)  
(Huge explosion)  
Ashleigh: (Stares at the smoke) Jordan, you just had to bring Dave, didn't you?  
Jordan: (Laughs and picks up 'Dave') I like you!  
(The rest of the BK come running in)  
Ohgi: What on earth was that!  
Ashleigh: Hmn, though I guess it ended up going in our favor.  
Jordan: (Points) Get them!  
(Jordan, Ashleigh, and the rest of the minions throw the remaining BK into metal shipping containers like Tamaki.)  
Jordan: Perfect! We're done. (Looks to the minions) Good work, team!  
The Minions: (Cheer)  
Ashleigh: I like them a lot better. They're more fun.  
Jordan: (Nods) Now to Phase Two!  
(Later… )  
(Zero finally enters the meeting only to be greeted by a mass of hyperactive yellow minions!)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Sitting in the back, waving like mad)  
Zero: What are these things!

_Ashleigh: Your new Black Knights!  
Zero__: But they aren't threatening at all! How do you expect me to obliterate Britannia if I have to work with these… things! Ashleigh! Why is the one next to you wearing a cape!  
Ashleigh: I thought he would look spiffy in it.  
Jordan: (Holds up a minion) See, I put this one in a bunny suit! Isn't he cute?  
Zero: Black Knights are not supposed to be cute! What did you do with everyone!  
Ashleigh: Can't tell you.  
Zero: C.C.!  
Jordan: She's still out hunting Suzaku.  
Zero: (Sighs) Fine… Let's go see if they can even destroy things.  
All the minions: YAY!_

Jordan: Oh can they destroy things…  
Ashleigh: Seriously, did you not notice the big smoldering hole in the wall? (Points)  
Zero: You mean you two didn't do that?  
Jordan: (Facepalm) We're much more sophisticated than that! I mean, we've replaced your entire army!  
Ashleigh: With cartoon characters, no less. (Gets an idea) Oh, Jordan! Next week we replace them all with Poke'Mon!  
Jordan: (Promptly begins to freak out)  
Zero: Wait, wait. What on earth is a Poke'Mon? I don't even know what these things are yet! (Points to a group of minions climbing on each other's shoulders to open the door for him.)  
Jordan: They're minions. What else do you need to know? They can do all sorts of cool things!  
Ashleigh: Yeah, just watch this! (Snatches up a minion, cracks his back and shakes him up.)  
Minion: (While being shaken, says panicked gibberish) (Then he starts glowing!)  
(She sets him down and all the other minions crowd around him)  
Other Minions: Whoa…  
Jordan: (Jumps up and down) I didn't know you could do that! Awesome!  
Ashleigh: Unfortunately, it only works once. You can stick them in the freezer if you want!  
Zero: And when exactly is that going to be necessary?  
Ashleigh: Well when you put a glow stick in the freezer is glows longer, so-  
Zero: Not that. I mean under what circumstances will I need them to glow!  
Jordan: (Shrugs, hugging the glowing minion) I dunno. You're the one that comes up with all the crazy scenarios. You tell us.  
The Minions: (Look to each other and nod. "Uh-huh"s and "Yeah"s are said.)

_(At that moment, one of the little minions comes ramming through a wall in the Guren.)  
All the Minions: (Stare in awe) Oooooooohhhhh…  
Ashleigh: Jerry! That's not how you use that thing!  
Zero: Hey! He could have ruined that Knightmare Frame!  
Jordan: At least it wasn't the Lancelot.  
C.C.: (Enters the room) So this is what you two were up too. (Picks up one of the minions.) They're cute.  
Zero: You would...  
C.C.: What was that?  
Jordan: Lulu's in trouble!  
Zero: Nothing.  
C.C.: Anyway, I still can't find Suzaku.  
Ashleigh: Looks like those Ninja Skills of his are setting in.  
C.C.: Yes well, I still have a few tricks of my own. (As she leaves) Oh, and don't let them near the Gawain. … Or my Pizza.  
Ashleigh: Don't worry, they only like IHOP.  
All the Minions: Pancakes!  
Jordan: That reminds me: I'm hungry. Is the meeting over yet?  
Zero: Not until you replace all the original Black Knights!  
Ashleigh: Come on! They proved they can destroy stuff!  
Kallen: (Runs in) What's going on here!  
Ashleigh: Damn! I knew we missed someone!  
Kallen: Where is everyone? And what are these things?  
Zero: Kallen! Thank heaven your here!  
Jordan: (Whispers) Do we throw her in with the others?_

Ashleigh: Hmm… I dunno. It depends on her reaction.  
Kallen: (Shaking some Minions off of her leg) Zero, what's going on? Where's Ohgi and the others?  
Zero: That can easily be explained… (Turns to Jordan and Ashleigh)  
Kallen: Ah. I completely understand.  
Ashleigh: Look at it this way: You can use the minions in an attack, but only once. The Britannians will be stuck wondering what's charging towards them, instead of retaliating.  
Kallen: … That actually makes sense.  
Zero: Can these things even fight in an organized manner! All I've seen so far is a few rouges destroying the walls!  
Jordan: Can they organize? (Turns to the Minions) Alright, team!  
(The Minions perk up)  
Jordan: Just like we practiced! And… Go!  
(The Minions suddenly break off into groups- The smallest group starts singing a cappella, the next dances to the tune in unison, and another scatters in all directions until one of them runs towards Jordan with the keys to the Lancelot.)  
Jordan: Perfect!  
Zero: … Do I even have to say anything at this point?  
Ashleigh: When did you teach them to do that!  
Jordan: (Whilst twirling the keys) Yesterday.  
Suzaku: (Suddenly bursts into the room) Hey, those are my keys! (Pause) Kallen? Zero?  
The other four: Suzaku?  
C.C.: (Calmly appears in another door) There you are.  
Suzaku: Would you look at the time! (As he dashes off he screams:) See you at the Clubhouse!  
C.C.: (Trots after him, sighing) He's only making it harder on himself…  
(Pause)  
Ashleigh: Well that was entertaining. (Goes back to Jordan) Exactly why did you teach them that trick?  
Jordan: (Shrugs) 'Cause I wanted to. Oh, you wanna see another one? I taught this one to make cookies for me!

_Zero: We don't have time for that!  
Ashleigh: Common! These things are indestructible!  
Jordan: Yeah, want me to hit this one with a hammer? (Holds up Paul, the Minion)  
Minion Paul: (In that voice) What? No!  
(As she sets him back down three other Minions run in with a giant mallet and slam it down on Paul's head. Eventually Paul bounces back into shape, just like a squeaky toy.)  
Minion Paul: Ohh… (Laugh) I'm okay!  
(Meanwhile… in the shipping crate box all the Black Knights are being held in...)  
(Bang! Bang!)  
Tamaki: Do you guys really think ramming me into the wall will work?  
Random Terrorist #1: Of course!  
Random Terrorist #2: And if not, we end up getting rid of you. So it's win-win!  
Tamaki: Hey!  
Random Terrorist #1: Alright go again in 3... 2...  
All Knights: 1!  
(They are able to break through the wall with Tamaki's thick head.)  
(They all go charging into the room where Ashleigh, Jordan, Kallen, Zero, and all the Minions are.)  
Random Terrorist #1: What are these things?  
Zero: Britannians! Kill them now!  
Random Terrorist #2: But… they're cute...  
Zero: (Sighs)  
Jordan: That's right! They're not Britannians! They're... uh…  
Ashleigh: Your new pets!  
All Knights: Pets?  
Jordan: Yes! They like to destroy things too!  
Random Terrorist #1: Well I do like this one with the blaster ray…_

Tamaki: And I do like to destroy things!  
Jordan: Then it's settled! Everyone gets to take a Minion home with them!  
(The Black Knights cheer)  
Zero: Well, I suppose that fixed everything…  
Jordan: (Hugs Paul) I'm gonna miss you!  
Ashleigh: Maybe you could-  
Zero: No!  
Jordan: But-  
Zero: No!  
Ashleigh: (Shrugs) Preemptive strike. I can't argue with it.  
Jordan: Aw…

Later… At the Clubhouse…

Jordan: That was the best meeting ever!  
Ashleigh: If you say so. You realize we're going to have to think of something to tell Gru. Since his Minion Army is now gone.  
Jordan: Eh, worry about it later!  
Lelouch: (Sighs)  
Jordan: What's wrong with you?  
Lelouch: (Glare) There's something about you two that makes one feel suicidal.  
Ashleigh and Jordan: (Grab his arms) Don't do it, Lulu!  
Lelouch: (Shakes them off) Get off of me!  
C.C.: (Walks into the room) Looks like you all had an eventful time.  
Ashleigh: Very much so, and that reminds me: Did you ever find Suzaku?  
C.C.: Oh yes, and don't worry, he's in a better place now.  
Jordan: What? You didn't kill him did you? You said you wouldn't kill him!  
C.C.: No, no I didn't kill him. I simply issued divine punishment.  
Ashleigh: And that's not ominous at all. But whatever, as long as he's not dead… It's almost sunrise: time to go to bed.  
(Everyone else agrees and goes to their respective bedrooms, except C.C. who stands in the center of the room and looks up.)  
(Suzaku is hanging by his ankles, upside-down from the ceiling. He's wrapped in C.C.'s straightjacket with duct tape over his mouth. When he tries to shout for help it's just quiet mush.)  
C.C.: (Smirks) God, huh? (Laugh) Lets see your mighty spin-kick help you now. (As Suzaku squirms, trying to get free, she calmly goes over to the door and switches off the lights.)

Owari!

XxX

**Author's Notes- **Well then, it's been a while, hasn't it? I hope this chapter was kind of, maybe, worth the wait. I thought it was decent…

Alright, I know you guys are probably furious at us, but you have to understand where we're coming from. Or rather, where we're going.

_**Author's Notes- **__I hope you guys enjoyed... Well, both of us are going to college in a few weeks, so please don't be mad- but I'm not sure how well we can keep this up. Not saying this is the end, but it will not update as much._

**After we get used to the transition, maybe,**

_**-Destiny**_


	28. Blood Rush

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Family Guy… or Kool-Aid… or Facebook… or Pizza Hut…**

**Author's Notes**- Ah… I don't even want to go into it…. Blah…. Oh, and this chapter really isn't just a poor excuse for us to use our favourite plot again. The idea in the beginning came first, and the rest just fit perfectly into place…

_**Author's Notes-**__Okay, yes it took forever. Hopefully this will make up for it. Enjoy it, because there's no telling when the next one will come out!_

xXx

_Six months later…_

_(Jordan and Ashleigh walk through the front door.)  
Ashleigh: Jordan, do feel like something is… wrong?  
Jordan: Nope. Everything's perfect in my world! (Jingles the keys to the Lancelot inside her pockets.)  
Ashleigh: I feel like I'm really forgetting something important. Wait, why do you still have the keys to the Lancelot?  
Jordan: Suzaku hasn't come looking for them yet!  
(Both girls stop and stare at each other. A noise comes from above and they look up to see Suzaku still hanging from the ceiling.)  
Ashleigh: Hold on Suzy, we'll get you down!  
(They cut him down and his head bounces off the floor like a ball.)  
Jordan: That's not normal… but it was cool.  
Ashleigh: I bet it's from where we left him upside down for so long… all the blood rushed to his head.  
Jordan: Sorry we left you hanging from the ceiling for six months, Suzaku!  
Suzaku: (Mumbling) Well, that was rather unorthodox, don't you think?  
Jordan: Huh?  
Suzaku: If the two of you have such lax attention spans, as to which you can no longer remember me dangling haphazardly from the chandelier, perhaps it would be best if you were no longer the main characters of this fictional story of a world that's fictional in itself.  
Jordan: … Huh?  
Suzaku: (Facepalm)  
Ashleigh: Hold on a minute. Suzaku, is that you?  
Suzaku: Of course it's me, who else shares this countenance?  
Ashleigh: But you're… intelligent.  
Suzaku: That is correct Ashleigh. For being suspended in an inverted fashion for so long, all the blood has indeed rushed to my brain. Thus, the over-oxidization of my brain cells caused me to gain a wider insight and higher intellectual capabilities. And I'm afraid that now, I am even smarter than Lelouch! (Maniacal laugh)  
Ashleigh: Well, to be fair, that's not a very large accomplishment.  
Jordan: (Backs away) Maybe we should leave that straight jacket on him…  
Suzaku: Unfortunately, that is not possible. For now that I am so much smarter than you, I know how to escape from them.  
(There is a click and then Suzaku pops out of the jacket.)  
Ashleigh: Oh great…  
Suzaku: And I also happen to know that Jordan has my keys in her pocket.  
(He takes the keys out of Jordan's pockets while she's standing motionless, because she's so stunned.)_

(Suzaku then flees the room)  
Ashleigh: Well this is definitely… not good.  
Jordan: What are we gonna do now? Lulu's gonna kill us!  
Ashleigh: Ha, like he could. Lelouch is not the one I'm worried about at the moment.  
Jordan: Who was the one that put Suzaku up there anyway? C.C.?  
Ashleigh: I believe so… But we'll worry about that later. We need to make sure that Suzaku doesn't go wreak havoc on everyone!  
Lelouch: (Suddenly behind them, looks at them suspiciously) Why is Suzaku wreaking havoc?  
(The two turn around, but say nothing.)  
Lelouch: What did you do?  
Ashleigh: Well, you see… It's a long story, but…  
Jordan: (Collapses on the ground and grabs Lelouch's leg) Oh Lulu it's horrible! We forgot about Suzaku! He was hanging from the ceiling and all the blood rushed to his head and now he's really, really smart!  
Lelouch: (Tries to shake her off) What?  
Ashleigh: And here I was going to let him down easy…  
Lelouch: But wait, when Jordan says "really, really smart" what is that equivalent to? It doesn't mean anything to me.  
Jordan: Hey! What's that supposed to mean!  
Ashleigh: Apparently, Suzaku believes that he carries the intelligence to rival you. And if that's true… (Shudder)  
Lelouch: Damn, he could ruin everything. Even more so than usual!  
Jordan: How can we dumb him down again? Hit him with something heavy?  
Ashleigh: I like that idea. (Grabs her baseball bat)  
Lelouch: I suppose it's worth trying…  
Jordan: I'll call more people! (Grabs her phone and dials Kallen) Hey, Kallen! Wanna hit Suzaku over the head with us?  
Kallen: Do I! (She sprints over)

Later…

_Jordan: Wait… Ash, we can't hit him. He'll probably find a way to dodge the bat...  
Ashleigh: True… But how else are we supposed to make him stupid?  
Kallen: We could make him watch Family Guy.  
Lelouch: That will take too long.  
Ashleigh: And why would we punish ourselves like that?  
Kallen: Then what else is there!  
C.C.: I believed you have "dumbed him down" before.  
Jordan: We did?  
Ashleigh: Of course! The alcohol!  
Lelouch: Oh no...  
Jordan: Yeah, alcohol kills your brain cells, right?  
Kallen: (Shivers) Did someone say alcohol?  
Jordan: But… how do we get it in him without him knowing?  
Ashleigh: Easy!  
Lelouch: How is that easy?  
Ashleigh: We drug him.  
Lelouch: (Sigh) Why do I even bother asking anymore?  
Kallen: Who's going to do it?  
Jordan: We'll need someone who can't be beaten! Someone invincible!  
(Everyone looks to C.C., who is sitting down eating pizza.)_

C.C.: (Sees everyone watching her and sighs) You would all be lost without me, wouldn't you?  
Lelouch: (Rolls his eyes)  
Jordan: Yes, oh great one with the magnificent green hair!  
C.C.: Too bad for you, I refuse to be a part of this.  
Lelouch: You refuse? You realize that this is all your fault, right?  
C.C.: I do. I simply don't care.  
Jordan and Ashleigh: You what!  
Lelouch: (Sighs again) I told you this wouldn't work.  
Ashleigh: Forget it, then! I have an idea!

Later again…

Suzaku: (Doing… something… Plotting to overthrow Britannia, maybe.)  
Ashleigh: (Walks up with a pitcher of Kool-Aid)  
Suzaku: This is suspicious.  
Ashleigh: Suspicious? If you're going to overthrow the government, you think I'm not gonna help?  
Suzaku: … This is true.  
Ashleigh: So, to toast to our camaraderie, and because champagne is disgusting, I brought the ceremonial Kool-Aid!  
Suzaku: Since when is Kool-Aid considered ceremonial?  
Ashleigh: (Pours two glasses) Since just now! (Hands him one) Now drink up!  
Suzaku: I suppose. Since I don't believe you'll be that useless to me.  
Ashleigh: That's the spirit! (They clink glasses and drink)  
Suzaku: This is very… peculiar tasting Kool-Aid….  
Ashleigh: Is it? (Pours him more)  
Suzaku: (Drinks that too) I can't place it… Tell me, what is it? It seems familiar and yet… (He falls over)  
Ashleigh: (Pours herself another glass) Hmpf, wimp.  
(Everyone else runs up)  
Kallen: (Pokes Suzaku) Wow… (Looks to Ashleigh) Why aren't you like him?  
Ashleigh: (Thumbs-up!) I have a high tolerance!  
Jordan: But that was quick… how much vodka is in there?  
Ashleigh: Vodka! That'd take forever! I put gin in this!

_Jordan: I should have figured that….  
Lelouch: Great... Now what happens when he wakes up?  
Ashleigh: Well, for one thing, we are not going back to the Waffle House!  
Kallen: And it wouldn't be a very good idea to take him out in public either…  
Jordan: I got it!  
(Later that day… at the Clubhouse…)  
(A very drunk Suzaku wakes up)  
Suzaku: (Suddenly perks up) Suzaku awake!  
Ashleigh: (Groans) And so it begins…  
Suzaku: (Struggles) Suzaku... can't move?  
Jordan: Nope. After the damage you caused LAST time… we decided to tie you down to a bed THIS time.  
Kallen: And since Lelouch isn't drunk either we decided it was safer for him this way.  
Lelouch: (Shivers at the thought)  
Suzaku: Suzaku wanna move!  
Ashleigh: He sounds like a toddler.  
Suzaku: Suzaku wanna move! Suzaku wanna move!  
Kallen: (Looking out the window) Hey guys, he's causing a bit of a scene… Some of the students are looking up here…  
Lelouch: I can't believe I'm saying this… but untie him. Now, before he causes any more damage! We really don't need any more strange rumors spreading around…  
Suzaku: Suzaku scream!  
Jordan: Alright, cry-baby! Hang on and we'll untie you…_

(As soon as Jordan unties him, Suzaku springs out of the bed and jumps up and down)  
Suzaku: Suzaku free!  
Kallen: Maybe this wasn't the best idea… I don't know if I can take this again…  
Ashleigh: (Holds up the Kool-Aid) Would you like some too?  
Kallen: Uh, that'll be a no.  
Suzaku: (Abruptly sits down on the floor) Suzaku BORED!  
Jordan: (Hands him a colouring book and some crayons) Here Pretty Green Eyes, play with this!  
Suzaku: (Scribbles in the book) Suzaku colour!  
Lelouch: (Facepalm) Well then, I officially opt-out of babysitting duty. I'll be back when he returns to normal. (He turns to leave, but Jordan and Ashleigh stand in the door)  
Jordan: Oh no! I don't think so!  
Ashleigh: If we have to suffer through Suzaku's… state, then so do you!  
Lelouch: On what grounds?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Unison) Because we said so!  
Lelouch: (Attempts to use Geass) Let me pass!  
Ashleigh: (Shakes her head) Sorry!  
Jordan: But that doesn't work on us anymore!  
Ashleigh: Don't you remember?  
Lelouch: I've already used it on you… (They nod)  
Suzaku: (Holds up his finished colouring and shows it to Kallen and C.C.) Suzaku finished!  
Kallen: Uh, yes… Very good!  
C.C.: (Pats him on the head)  
Suzaku: (Grins) Suzaku proud!

_Suzaku: Suzaku need tape!  
Ashleigh: What for?  
Suzaku: Suzaku hang masterpiece on refrigerator. (He runs downstairs)  
Jordan: Maybe we should follow him... I don't think he's safe alone- in this condition...  
Lelouch: Hold on, now that you brought it up... Since you two put him in this state, then you get to baby-sit him!  
Kallen: Well, you get to help too!  
Lelouch: Says who?  
Kallen: Says me! (She pulls a bottle of vodka out of her bra and pours it down Lelouch's throat.)  
Ashleigh: Kallen! He has to go to the Black Knights today!  
Jordan: … And HOW did you fit that in your shirt!  
Suzaku: Suzaku return! And with cookies too!  
Jordan: Not now Suzaku, we're having a bit of an issue with Lelouch…  
Suzaku: Lelouch look fine to Suzaku.  
Ashleigh: He's passed-out on the floor!  
Kallen: Damn, all my vodka is gone…  
Ashleigh: I think you drowned him in it!  
Suzaku: Suzaku know how to wake Lelouch up! (He takes Lelouch up in his arms and speeds out the door.)  
C.C.: (Crashes back to Earth) I can see things got interesting after I stopped listening... (She walks over to the window.) And it is about to become even more interesting.  
Ashleigh: What are you talking about? (She looks out the window too) Suzaku, no!  
(Outside at the pool... In January…)  
Suzaku: Suzaku Jump! (Suzaku leaps into the pool with Lelouch in his arms.)  
Jordan: (Walks out of the room) I'll get the towels...  
Lelouch: (Jolted awake- freaks.) Cold! (He starts flipping out and holding Suzaku under the water.)  
Suzaku: (Makes a gurgling noise…) _(He's actually saying "Suzaku drown!")_  
Ashleigh: (She finds the net that is usually used to gather leaves from the pool and fishes both of them out with it.)  
Jordan: (Wraps the towel around them.)  
Suzaku: Suzaku dry!_

Lelouch: (Coughing and shivering) What the hell was that!  
Jordan: Amazing, that's what it was.  
Ashleigh: I was going to say revenge. Don't you remember two chapters ago, when you pushed Suzaku into a frozen pool?  
Lelouch: That's hardly any consolation.  
Suzaku: (Squirms) Suzaku COLD!  
Jordan: Then you shouldn't have jumped into the pool in January, dummy! You caught a cold last time!  
Ashleigh: Come on, let's go inside…  
(Jordan and Ashleigh escort the two inside. Once they shut the door, Suzaku bolts into the next room.)  
Jordan: Um…. Where is he going?  
Lelouch: (Nursing a headache) There's no telling…  
Kallen: (At the top of the stairs with C.C.) Hey! Why are you still the same? After stealing all of my vodka, I order you to be affected by it!  
Lelouch: (Quirks an eyebrow at her) Sounds to me like you're the one who's been drinking.  
C.C.: (Stares off) Does anyone else smell smoke?  
Ashleigh: Oh lord….  
Jordan: (Runs off) Pretty Green Eyes!  
(They find Suzaku in the kitchen, standing in front of an open oven. The towel he'd been using is lying across the wires, smoking.)  
Jordan: What do you think you're doing!  
Suzaku: Suzaku warming!  
Ashleigh: (Turns off the oven) More like "Suzaku burn the clubhouse down!"  
Suzaku: But… but… Suzaku want…  
Jordan: Just go upstairs and get a blanket or something!  
Suzaku: (Goes) Suzaku search!  
Ashleigh: (Sighs) I'd forgotten how annoying this was…  
Lelouch: As I said before, this was your idea, so you two need to deal with it.  
Ashleigh: Well then, when he starts coming onto you, don't come crying to us!  
Lelouch: (Starts to say "What?" but is interrupted by a flying Suzaku tackling him)  
Suzaku: Suzaku return! (Holds up a large fluffy blanket) With warmth!

_Lelouch: Suzaku, if you don't get off of me, I will be forced to hurt you.  
C.C.: (Snickers) Like you could ever hurt him.  
Suzaku: Suzaku do wrong?  
Jordan: No Suzy... Lelouch is just being a meany-pants.  
Ashleigh: Yeah Lelouch would never willingly show anyone his feelings.  
Suzaku: But Suzaku want!  
Kallen: Woah. Someone has a complex.  
Suzaku: (Starts beating on Lelouch) Show Suzaku feeling! Show Suzaku!  
Lelouch: (Tries to defend) Someone make him stop!  
Ashleigh: But you have to show him feeling, Lulu.  
Lelouch: How? (Says things like "Ow!" and "That hurts!")  
Jordan: Uh…. Hug him!  
Lelouch: Do- ow…- What?  
C.C.: (Walks off) Let me go get my camera first...  
Kallen: Yes! You have to hug him!  
Suzaku: Suzaku hug! (Keeps slapping Lelouch while whining.)  
Lelouch: (After a long… long… pause) Fine!  
(He grabs Suzaku's hands and hugs him- only slightly.)  
Suzaku: Suzaku happy! (He grabs Lelouch and holds him reeeaally tightly.)  
Lelouch: He's cutting off my circulation…_

C.C.: (Snaps a picture) This is so going on my Facebook.  
Jordan: …. You have a Facebook?  
Lelouch: (Shoves Suzaku away)  
Suzaku: Suzaku stumble!  
Lelouch: You wouldn't dare!  
C.C.: Wouldn't I?  
Suzaku: Suzaku verb!  
Kallen: Now you're just baiting her…  
Suzaku: (Trying to get C.C.'s attention) Suzaku strike pose! (Strikes po- oh, never mind.)  
C.C.: (Takes a picture) How nice.  
(This continues for a while, until…)  
C.C.: Ah, my batteries are dead.  
Suzaku: Suzaku disappoint….  
Jordan: (Groans) Belly hungry! Jordan need food.  
Ashleigh: Oh god, it's contagious!  
C.C.: Pizza?  
Lelouch and Kallen: NO!  
Jordan: Sure.  
C.C.: (Calls Pizza Hut) Now, who's going to get it?  
Suzaku: (Leaps up) Suzaku retrieve! (He grabs the keys to the Lancelot and dashes out the door.)  
Jordan: Um… should he really be drinking and driving?  
Ashleigh: … Probably not…. Kallen?  
Kallen: (Sighs) I'll go get the Guren…

_Jordan: I swear if Suzaku wrecks the Lancelot I'm going to kill him!  
Ashleigh: I think we're already on the verge of giving him alcohol poisoning…  
(Somewhere downtown, there goes a pizza guy on a moped with three pizzas on the back.)  
Suzaku: (Peeps out from behind the corner of a building) Suzaku stalk!  
(Back at the Clubhouse...)  
C.C.: I hope Suzaku hurries back; I'm starving.  
Lelouch: Yes well, I'm afraid I must go prepare to meet with the Black Knights.  
Ashleigh: (Smirks) Good luck with that.  
(Lelouch takes his leave…)  
Jordan: Why did you smirk?  
C.C.: Do you really need to ask?  
(At this time Ashleigh pulls the cape out of her Mallet Space and places it on her shoulders.)  
Jordan: I guess not.  
(Back downtown…)  
(The pizza delivery guy stops and takes one of the pizzas off the back of his scooter...)  
Suzaku: (Pops out from behind another building.) Suzaku prowl….  
(He then does some sort of ninja move that only Suzaku can do, grabs the remaining pizzas and bolts.)  
Suzaku: Suzaku steal!  
Pizza Delivery Guy: Hey! You have to pay for those!  
(Kallen then comes flying by in the Guren.)  
Kallen: Sorry about him! (Throws a few dollars out of the window to pay the man.)_

(Suzaku returns with the pizzas and Kallen is following behind him, exhausted.)  
Suzaku: Suzaku return!  
Kallen: (Falls to the floor)  
Ashleigh: What happened to you?  
Kallen: He kept getting lost…  
Jordan: Then why didn't you lead him back?  
Kallen: Every time I got near him he'd scream "Suzaku attack!"  
C.C.: (Takes the pizzas from Suzaku) Very nice. (Opens the box and makes a face) I didn't order this…  
Kallen: That's because he just stole some pizzas off the guy's moped… he probably couldn't remember where the restaurant was…  
C.C.: But… (Holds up a slice of the pizza) Anchovies?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: EEWWW!  
Lelouch: I didn't think anyone really ate those… Isn't it just urban legend?  
Suzaku: Anchovies? SUZAKU DISGUSTED! (He grabs the pizzas and runs back out the door) Suzaku complain!  
Kallen: (Sighs)  
(Suzaku jumps in the Lancelot with the pizzas and makes his way downtown to the local Pizza Hut. He uses the hadron cannon to launch the grotesque pizzas through the restaurant windows.)  
Suzaku: Suzaku raaaage!  
(Meanwhile, Jordan, Ashleigh and C.C. cheer him on from the parking lot.)  
Ashleigh: This is awesome.  
Jordan: (Nods) But maybe we should leave soon…. In case the police show up.  
Ashleigh: Good idea.  
C.C.: (Cheering Suzaku on) Yes! How dare they defile my pizza with something so horrible!

_Ashleigh: C.C., the cops are going to come after Suzaku for defacing public property and possibly vandalism…  
C.C.: Right. Let's go.  
(The girls leave and now Suzaku is drunk and on his own.)  
(The cops show up...)  
Cop 1: Excuse me sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to come with us.  
Suzaku: (Stumbles out of the Lancelot) Suzaku no understand.  
Cop 2: You're under arrest for defacing public property, stealing, and being drunk in public.  
Suzaku: Suzaku in public?  
Cop 1: Yes sir.  
Suzaku: Suzaku… drunk?  
Cop 1: It seems that way.  
Suzaku: Suzaku insulted! Suzaku never do such a thing!  
Cop 2: Well, we've got equipment that can help us figure that out.  
Suzaku: Suzaku no go!  
Cop 1: Then I'm afraid you're also resisting arrest.  
(They take hold of Suzaku, and because he is so drunk it's not hard for them to take him down.)  
(Downtown they throw him into a cell with a bunch of other males.)  
Random Criminal 1: Hey there, pretty.  
Suzaku: Suzaku no girl!  
Random Criminal 2: That's what we like about you.  
(They circle him)  
Suzaku: Suzaku feel violated..._

Random Criminal 1: C'mere! (He lunges at Suzaku)  
Suzaku: Suzaku PUNCH! (He gets the guy right in the jaw, and he falls back)  
Random Criminal 2: Why you-!  
Suzaku: Suzaku KICK! (Does the infamous Spinzaku!)  
(Random Criminal 1 was getting up just as Suzaku did his spin-kick, and so they were both decked.)  
Lelouch: (Suddenly outside the jail cell) Suzaku.  
Suzaku (Spins around, haha) Lelouch! (Tries to hug him through the bars.)  
Lelouch: (Opens the cell and drags him out) Come on, let's go.  
Suzaku: Lelouch… bail Suzaku out?  
Lelouch: (Smirks) No, Lelouch geass all of the guards into standing in the corner and counting to one million.  
Suzaku: Ohhhh…..  
(Back at the Clubhouse….)  
Suzaku: (Bursts in) Suzaku back! But wonder what happened to the Lancelot?  
Jordan: Don't worry Pretty Green Eyes, I drove it back for you!  
Suzaku: That make Suzaku nervous…  
Kallen: Tell me about it, she was tailgating me the whole way back!  
Jordan: (Sticks her tongue out) It wouldn't happen if you would just drive faster!  
C.C.: I'm just glad you found time to pick up the pizzas as well.  
Ashleigh: Anyway, thanks for busting him out Lulu. It was something only you could do.  
Lelouch: Yes I suppose…  
Suzaku: (Standing around, looking quite bored.) Suzaku bored again. When are we going on wild adventures like usual?  
Kallen: Wild adventures? Your entire drunken LIFE is a wild adventure!  
Jordan: Wait… Suzy, did you just use a pronoun?  
Ashleigh: Oh, god. He's sobering up!

_Lelouch: Great, how do we hide the fact that he was drunkenly arrested for burglary and vandalism?  
C.C.: Allow me... (She takes a frying pan from her Mallet Space and sneaks up behind Suzaku and hits him over the head with it- knocking him out.)  
(Everyone stares)  
C.C.: I've always wanted to do that.  
Jordan: Why do we always allow her to do as she pleases?  
Ashleigh: Because she's a witch. She CAN do whatever she pleases.  
Kallen: Come on, help me carry him up the stairs…  
(Later on that day…)  
(Suzaku is gently waking up from his well-deserved nap…)  
Suzaku: Ouch… Why does my head hurt so much?  
(He carefully goes downstairs…)  
Ashleigh: Glad to see you're awake Suzy.  
Suzaku: What happened?  
Jordan: You hit your head pretty hard on a pole.  
Lelouch: Yeah, you were chasing after Jordan for the keys to the Lancelot when you ran right into it. So blame her.  
Jordan: Hey!  
Suzaku: Well anyway, I'm gonna go take a shower and clean up…  
(The rest go back to whatever they were doing...)  
Ashleigh: Good cover guys.  
(They hear a scream from upstairs.)  
Kallen: That didn't sound good…  
Suzaku: (Running down the stairs with a towel around him.) Why is there a tattoo that says 'Gino' on my ass!  
Jordan: Time to run away!  
(They all bolt for the door with Suzaku trailing behind them.)_

Owari!

XxX

**Author's Notes- **Alright, I admit, this isn't the greatest chapter ever… But it's over three-thousand words so hopefully that makes up for the long wait. Along with Suzaku's…. condition, haha. Aimless writing at its finest!

_**Author's Notes- **__So yeah... Sorry I ended it badly but it's 6:00 here and I have yet to eat dinner… typed up 3 letters and revised a paper... So not my best night. But please forgive me the next ending will be better!_

**Whenever that will be,**

_**-Destiny**_

**Bonus:**Jordan and I, along with some friends of ours, compiled a list of many 'Suzaku-isms' for this chapter. In fact, there were so many of them that we couldn't fit them all in! So as an added bonus, I'll list them for you here. For funsies.

**Suzaku…**  
Explode!  
Went there  
Agree  
Feel odd…  
Scoot  
Hungry  
Breakdance  
Choke  
Exhausted!


	29. InTune and Foiled!

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Vocaloid… or Nintendo… or Okamiden… or Star Wars… or the Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi… or Batman…**

**Author's Notes**- So…. Been a while, hasn't it? There is more explanation below, of course.

xXx

Meanwhile… at the Legion of Doom… Uh- I mean, the Black Knights…

(Everyone is preparing for an altercation with Britannia)  
Lelouch: (Storms into his quarters) Alright, where is it?  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Look up at him innocently) Where is what?  
Lelouch: Don't joke. You know very well what.  
Jordan: (Holds up the Zero helmet) You mean this?  
Lelouch: (Snatches it from her) What did you do to it?  
Ashleigh: Your vocal distorter was malfunctioning, so we fixed it.  
Lelouch: (Sighs) I'm going to hate myself later for believing that, I'm sure. But I don't have time to dispute it with you.  
Jordan: Doesn't that mean that you actually DON'T believe us?  
Lelouch: (Leaves)  
Ashleigh: Oh, he's definitely going to hate himself.  
Jordan: Yeah…. Let's go watch!  
(They follow…)

So…

Random Terrorist #1: Hey Zero, what's the point of all of this?  
Zero: We're GO-ing to… (He stops) WhAt the-?  
Random Terrorist #2: What happened to your voice?  
Zero: Where ARE thEY? WhAt did thEY DO?  
(He storms off again, towards the sound of the giggling.)  
Zero: WhAT is the MEA-ning of thIs?  
Jordan: (Between her laughter) Autotune!  
Ashleigh: (Also dying laughing) Now you appeal to the younger demographic!  
Zero: FIX IT. NAo.  
(That just makes them laugh harder.)

X

**Obligatory Author's Note-** It appears that this fic has _officially_ run out of momentum at last. What with Jordan's utter lack of a good relationship with ANY computer on this planet, and how busy we've become, not to mention how long this has been going, it's no wonder. Personally, I'm surprised it's lasted as long as it has. But I digress. I will attempt to stitch this chapter together in a quick and efficient way- and the next chapter will be totally dedicated to giving this Epic Fic of ours a proper ending. I'll explain a bit more later, but for now…

X

C.C.: (Walks in) Well, if it isn't a rap artist in our midst.  
Lelouch: (Takes off the mask) I don't need scrutiny from a witch. Besides, it's not like I planned this!  
Jordan: But autotune is coooool!  
Ashleigh: Do we really think that?  
Jordan: I'm not sure, but it seemed like a good idea at the time…  
Lelouch: Just how am I supposed to lead the Black Knights against Britannia with the voice of a Vocaloid?  
Ashleigh: It'll definitely be an attention-catcher, that's for sure.  
Jordan: Exactly! Just like Suzy in a hula skirt- it'll be bad attention, but it's distracting anyway!  
C.C.: (Munches on pizza) The hula skirt also sounds like a good idea.  
Lelouch: Not on your life. Hmph, or lack thereof.  
C.C.: (Glare)  
(Someone starts knocking on the door)  
Ohgi: Zero, we need your orders! The Britannians are almost in position!  
Lelouch: (In his 'Zero Voice') Just a moment, Ohgi. (Then, subdued) Fix my vocal distorter. Now. I will not tolerate your meddling any longer!  
Jordan: Maaan, what a party-pooper…  
Ashleigh: (Takes the mask and fiddles with it) I don't know what's more shocking, Lulu actually putting his foot down, or the fact that it took him twenty-nine chapters to do it.  
Lelouch: Regardless, this is serious business. I'll not have my plans ruined because of your jokes.  
(A click comes from the mask.)  
Ashleigh: Here you go.  
Lelouch: (Snatches it away and storms from the room) Is it too much to ask?  
Jordan: Well, that's boring. I guess we should just go back to the Clubhouse…  
Ashleigh: No, let's see what's going to happen here. It may be important. For the future.  
C.C.: You didn't really fix the mask did you?  
Ashleigh: Nope.

Meanwhile…

(Zero finally appears in front of the Black Knights)  
Ohgi: What are your orders, Zero?  
Zero: (Normal voice) The Britannians are in position. Squads C and F, take Route 4 and report to your corresponding checkpoints. Kallen's group, initiate operation Delta. The rest of you, continue with your initial orders and await further instructions!

(The Black Knights mobilize, and meanwhile… so do the girls.)

(Jordan, Ashleigh, and C.C. are lurking in the shadows nearby)  
Ashleigh: (Whips out a little Gameboy-like device)  
Jordan: (Whispers) What is that?  
Ashleigh: (Also whispering) Something wonderful.  
(She takes a stylus and drags it along the screen.)  
Tamaki: Hey, Zero! You sure about this plan? The Britannians have us totally outnumbered!  
Zero: (His voice is suddenly the pitch of a chipmunk's) Of course, Tamaki.  
(There is a pause)  
Tamaki: (Keels over with hysterical laughter) What was that!  
Zero: (Quietly stewing with rage)  
Jordan: (Gasps) AWESOME! (Grabs the device and fiddles with it)  
Zero: (Now his voice is incredibly deep) THOSE GIRLS!  
Tamaki: (Dies of laughter yet again)  
Zero: (Storms around, searching) I'll obliterate them!  
C.C.: (Performs her own fiddling)  
Zero: (Nasally) I know it was you!  
(C.C. fiddles)  
Zero: (Robotic) Show yourselves NOW!  
(C.C. fiddles again)  
Zero: (Darth Vader) Or I will find you and destroy you!  
(He finally catches the sound of laughter—that is NOT coming from Tamaki—and stomps over.)  
Jordan: (Through tears and laughs) Hi Lulu!  
Zero: (Steals the device from C.C., adjusts his voice to normal, and immediately breaks it.)  
Ashleigh: HEY! My DS! How am I supposed to play Okamiden now?  
Zero: You should've thought of that before meddling in my endeavors!  
Ashleigh: But we ALWAYS meddle!  
Jordan: Like we said before Lulu, it's been twenty-nine chapters!  
C.C.: It doesn't seem so long…  
Ashleigh: That's what she said.  
Jordan: NOT AGAIN!  
Zero: ENOUGH!  
(The three go silent, although C.C. does so rather unhappily)  
Zero: I've had it with the two of you! I have half a mind to tie you up and toss you back through that crazy door you came through myself! Then I will subject the door to a wood-chipper! There are some things in which you do NOT meddle, thank you. And this is definitely one of them. Now go back to the clubhouse and stay out of my way.  
(He turns swiftly, his cape flipping, and storms away.)  
Jordan: Wooooow…. I've never seen Lulu so mad.  
Ashleigh: Again, I'm not sure what's more surprising: Lulu finally snapping, or the fact that it took twenty-nine chapters for him to do it!  
C.C.: Meh…. I've seen more terrifying things in my time.  
Ashleigh: I'm sure you have.  
Jordan: LIKE DINOSAURS!  
C.C.: …. Yes, Jordan. Like dinosaurs.  
Jordan: AWESOME.  
Ashleigh: Well, I never thought I'd see the day when we'd actually receive a tongue-lashing from Lelouch. I don't know what to do about this.  
Jordan: Wanna cover all of his stuff at home with aluminum foil?  
Ashleigh: Sounds good.

Later…. At the Clubhouse…

(Lelouch walks into his room to find everything—and I mean EVERYTHING—covered in aluminum foil!)  
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Pop out) SURPRISE!  
Lelouch: What. Is. This.  
Jordan: It's your room. What else would it be?  
Lelouch: (Picks up a covered pen from his desk, which is also covered, of course.) That's not what I meant.  
Ashleigh: Then it's aluminum foil. You're not very observant today, are you?  
Lelouch: Didn't I just instruct you a few hours ago to not meddle in my affairs anymore?  
Ashleigh: Yes, but I don't see how this could ever interfere with what you're planning.  
Jordan: Yep! We can be annoying without meddling! You seem to doubt us.  
Ashleigh: You think you would've learned by now. Look at how many chapters it's been!  
Lelouch: No one ever knows what you two are talking about. I stopped listening ages ago.  
Jordan: Aw, that's mean. Meany-pants!

(The door suddenly opens and Suzaku enters)  
Suzaku: Hey Lelouch, do you think I could borrow- (Stops at the sight of all the foil) …. Awesome.  
Ashleigh: Why, thank you. At least someone appreciates our handiwork.  
Suzaku: Can you do mine next?  
Lelouch: (Facepalm)  
Jordan: (Pulls out some more aluminum foil from her Mallet-Space) Sure thing, Pretty Green Eyes!  
Suzaku: You guys haven't called me that in a while.  
Ashleigh: Do you prefer Suzy?  
Suzaku: NO! No, I was just-  
Jordan: COME ON, SUZY! (Grabs Suzaku and runs out the door)  
Suzaku: Agh!  
Lelouch: (Rummaging through his room, pulls out one of the spare capes. It is covered in aluminum foil. He glances at Ashleigh.)  
Ashleigh: (Shrugs) I didn't think it was possible, but we managed to make the cape even more awesome. About 20% more awesome. (Whips out a roll of foil) We have the technology! (Runs off to join Suzaku and Jordan)

(When she reaches Suzaku's room, Suzaku leaps out from behind the door wearing an aluminum foil suit and wielding a matching sword.)  
Suzaku: A-ha! (Slashes with the sword)  
Ashleigh: (Dodges) Jordan! I thought we were covering his ROOM with the foil, not HIM!  
Jordan: (Currently covering the walls) I couldn't help it, he got into my stash!  
Suzaku: (Runs around the Clubhouse, wreaking havoc. He chases Arthur down one of the hallways.)  
C.C: (Walks out of a room, carrying a slice of pizza)  
Suzaku: (Swings his sword and accidently knocks the pizza from her hands. It falls to the floor.)  
C.C.: (Glares)  
Suzaku: (Freezes in terror) Oh, no. Not again. I'm sorry! (Gets on his hands and knees) I'm sorry, it was an accident! I swear it! I'm so sorry, C.C! Here! (Hands her his credit card) Order all the pizza you want, just spare my life!  
C.C.: ... Just this once. You're lucky I'm feeling generous today. (Walks away)  
Suzaku: Oh, thank me…

…

…

…

The Next Day…

(Ashleigh and Jordan are sitting around in the Clubhouse)  
Ashleigh: You know, Jordan, I have the strangest feeling.  
Jordan: Like... you want some cookie cake?  
Ashleigh: No, more like-  
Jordan: Like you're being watched?  
Ashleigh: No-  
Jordan: Like you're being READ?  
Ashleigh: …. No, like we're not doing anything! It feels like we've been in suspended animation for over a year now!  
Jordan: Now that you mention it… Did we forget to start time again?  
Ashleigh: (Facepalm) You're right! We've been living through the same day over and over again! That's why the story hasn't progressed at all!  
Jordan: But if it's the same day… why are they all different?  
Ashleigh: Because we DO different things, of course. Ugh, this is worse than the Endless Eight…  
Jordan: Well then (Stands up and thrusts her fist into the air) LET'S GO RESTART TIME!  
(The two run off, heading towards the shed behind the Clubhouse. They look behind the 'Inter-dimensional Door' where there is a large lever on the floor.)  
(It takes both of them to pull the lever back to the 'Normal' position.)

(With their task completed, Jordan and Ashleigh return to the Clubhouse, where Suzaku is just leaving.)  
Suzaku: Oh, hey you two.  
Jordan: Hi Pretty Green Eyes! What's up?  
Suzaku: Oh, you know. The usual. I have to go prepare for tomorrow.  
Ashleigh: What's tomorrow?  
Suzaku: How could you forget? It's the ceremony for Princess Euphemia's Special Administrative Zone of Japan! I'll see you later! (Leaves)

Jordan: … Uh, Ash? I think I remember why we stopped time now….  
Ashleigh: Oh-no, Batman…

**Owari!**

XxX

**Author's Notes-** Well, that's that. Granted, I know the last couple of sections aren't necessarily _funny_, but they're my building blocks for the final chapter. I think you guys can see where I'm planning to go with this. Then again, I may decide not to go through with it, as injecting humor into certain parts of the Code Geass plot is looking like a mighty task. Anyhow, I plan on letting the plot actually move through the story—all the way to the end—with us included.

Unless you guys can come up with something better, of course!

I really don't want it to end like this—just hanging there without a word. There has to be a final chapter. Chapter 30! This story of ours was a beautiful co-op of trolling mastery, and you guys are awesome for cheering us on! So, if I could ask for your assistance one last time, it would be greatly appreciated.

How should this story end? I'm placing it in your hands…!

**I await your input and wisdom,**

_**-Destiny**_

Eh... maybe I'll just write the rest of Code Geass as if Suzaku was drunk the entire time... Just kidding! Though that would explain a lot of the stuff he pulled in R2...


	30. Dafuq is a TARDIS?

**Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Doctor Who… or My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic… or Skittles… or How Many of You Actually Read These Crazy Disclaimers we Always Have?... or Jumbotron… or NyQuil… or CodeMENT… or the Time Warp… or Mortal Kombat… **

**Author's Notes**—You know it was only a matter of time for me to make a Doctor Who reference. Maybe I'll throw in some My Little Pony too. Who knows? A brohoof that transcends space and time! Doctor Whooves: to the rescue! Allons-y!

And now that I've successfully confused half of you and lost the respect of the other half, I would like to welcome you to the final chapter of _Britannia Did it!_ Hooray! It's been one wild and crazy ride, my friends… and as you know, all rides must come to an end. I cannot thank all of you enough for the wonderful times you've given Jordan and me. You guys were the gasoline that fueled our craziness, and while Jordan and I may have drifted apart as friends throughout the years, this fanfiction will serve as an inseverable link between us. I don't know if you can imagine the fun and joy we had while writing this story. E-mails were flying constantly; there were late-night conversations that brought the entire room to tears of laughter; at times, our entire circle of friends was involved in constructing a chapter; and the summer in which this fic was born still remains the greatest summer of my life.

So to all of our favourites, alerts, reviewers, and even you lurking readers that have never made contact: Thank you. From the bottom of our Otaku hearts.

Tl;dr—Now let's get on with it! Chapter 30!

P.S. Whatever is not funny in this chapter will be made up for in absolute awesomeness. Or something.

xXx

Midday…. At the SAZ Opening Ceremony…

(People in the crowd are chattering)  
: Will he come?  
: Do you think Zero will show up?  
: What does this mean for the Black Knights?  
: If Zero doesn't agree to this…  
: How will he keep the support of the people?  
Euphemia: (Thinking) Please, Zero…  
Random Guard #1: It's him!  
Random Guard #2: Zero has appeared on a Knightmare!  
(Zero flies in on the Gawain, piloted by C.C., of course. Suzaku looks nervous.)  
Euphemia: (Runs up) Oh, Zero! You really came!  
Zero: Yes, Princess Euphemia li Britannia. I have indeed. But first, I want to have a little discussion with you. Alone.  
Euphemia: Alone? Hmn…. Okay!  
Suzaku: Wait! Your Highness, that's far too dangerous! Please, allow me to accompany you!  
Euphemia: (Smiles) Oh, Suzaku. It'll be alright. Trust me.  
(Euphemia and Zero enter the mobile command center)

Meanwhile… In a dark and cramped space…

Jordan: Ow! Watch it!  
Ashleigh: I can't! It's too dark!  
Jordan: Are you sure this is a good idea? I can't even move!  
Ashleigh: Just a little more…  
Jordan: Just let Euphemia go crazy! No one cares!  
Ashleigh: I care! This single event will turn Suzaku into a complete and total jerk for a year and 20 episodes. He won't be the same anymore. No one will.  
Jordan: (Groans) Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine. But you owe me Skittles. Lots and lots and lots of Skittles!  
Ashleigh: Duly noted. Now hush! We're almost there!  
(The two crawl a bit further until…)  
Lelouch: (Laughs in the distance)  
Jordan: (Whispering) I'd recognize that evil laugh anywhere! We must be close!  
Euphemia: (Also distantly) Did you really think you could ever threaten me into shooting you?  
Lelouch: (Distantly…) Oh, I wouldn't have to. You see, no one can resist and order I give them. I could make you do anything.  
(The two silently crawl a bit more…)  
Euphemia: (Giggles) Anything?  
Lelouch: Yes. Even if I told you to-  
Jordan: -TO PUNCH SUZAKU!  
Lelouch: (Raises an eyebrow) – to punch Suzaku?  
Ashleigh: (Kicks Jordan. Whispering.) That wasn't what we planned!  
Jordan: (Whispers as well.) I panicked!  
Euphemia: (Wide-eyed) What? … Why would I? (Pause) Yes, you're right. I must punch Suzaku. Punch his lights out. He needs it. (Runs out of the room)  
Lelouch: What the-? Wait! Euphie, don't!

(He's about to follow, but then the ceiling buckles and Jordan and Ashleigh land in a heap in front of him.)  
Ashleigh: Damned air ducts aren't made like they used to be…  
Lelouch: (Livid) What. In the world. Are you doing!?  
Jordan: (Hops up) Saving your ass, is what!  
Lelouch: Wha-?  
Ashleigh: You mean you haven't noticed yet? Euphemia just left. That means…  
Lelouch: (Looks at his reflection in the mask) My Geass…  
Ashleigh: Yes. And just _what_ in the hell were you _about_ to tell her to do? To slaughter the Japanese? Come up with more innocent hypotheticals, man! Damn!  
Jordan: (Nods) Mhm-mhm!  
Lelouch: But if I've become like Mao… then that means…  
(They hear chaos erupting outside.)  
Jordan: Ooh! I don't want to miss this!  
(Lelouch replaces his mask and everyone runs outside. They make it out in time to see Euphemia clear her own guards and lay her fist right into the side of Suzaku's face. He goes flying across the stage.)  
(The crowd gasps)  
C.C.: (In the Gawain) Hah. Good on ya.  
Suzaku: (Now sprawled out on the ground, confused and a little embarrassed.) Suzaku… injured… Oh the pain… and hurt…  
Jordan: (Falls over herself laughing)  
Ashleigh: Not gonna lie, I'm kind of impressed. Euphie's got one powerful right hook!  
Zero: … Well, Cornelia _is_ her sister…

Euphemia: (Snaps out of it) Hm? Suzaku, what happened? Why are you lying on the floor?  
Suzaku: (Dizzy) You don't remember? You just… laid me out!  
Euphemia: I don't understand.  
Suzaku: (Springs to his feet) You just punched me! In the face!  
Euphemia: (Blinks… then laughs) I would never!  
Suzaku: Oh yeah? (Points to the Jumbotron that's positioned above the stage. It's showing an action-packed, high-definition instant-replay of the punch. In slow motion!)  
Darlton: (Off to the side with a microphone) And here's the replay… Look at that gorgeous preparation. The young Princess has a full backswing, her arm at a 90-degree angle with her shoulder blades. I haven't seen a hit this fine in a while… And here comes the acceleration. See how she puts her entire body into the forward motion. Her fully clenched fist is sailing through the air with all of her power—but it's controlled power. And finally, the connection. Just watch this! (The crowd cheers as Euphie's fist connects.) A nice, clean strike! The Princess makes full contact with Sir Kururugi's cheek—his cheekbone taking the full brunt of her assault. Watch as the flesh of his cheek begins to conform to the shape of her fist… before launching away! (Suzaku flies off-screen. The crowd cheers again.) Complete surprise, folks! His neck is snapped to the side and his entire body takes on the rest of the force, sending him flying! He gets a good two feet off the ground before finally hitting the stage about five feet from where he started! What a magnificent move by Princess Euphemia! (More cheering from the crowd.)  
Euphemia: … Oh. I suppose I did.  
Suzaku: (Rubs his cheek) There was no need for all the praise, Darlton.  
Darlton: (Thumbs-up!) I calls them as I sees them, Kururugi.  
Suzaku: So I see…  
(The crowd begins to chant Euphemia's name.)

Zero: …. Well, this certainly didn't turn out like I expected it to.  
Ashleigh: Nor I, but it was awesome.  
Jordan: (Clapping) Yay! Pretty Green Eyes took it like a pro!  
Ashleigh: I can see the history books now: "Euphemia li Britannia. The Princess that Punched God."  
Jordan: That's very metal… but I still don't like her.  
Zero: … Just what have you two wrought?  
Ashleigh: I feel like you ask us that every other day, Lulu.  
Zero: As do I. However, I truly mean it this time.  
Jordan: Well, you should be thanking us! If we didn't jump in, Euphemia would have killed a bunch of people by now!  
Ashleigh: This is especially true. And then, of course, to remedy it, you would have to-  
Zero: Okay! I get it! I'm indebted to you… slightly.  
Jordan: (Clings onto one of his arms) Hehehe, saaaay it!  
Zero: Not on your life.  
Ashleigh: (Clings to the other) Come on… Say it!  
Zero: What? Get off of me!  
Both: _Say it!  
_Zero: Ugh. Fine. Thank you.  
Both: Yaaaay! You said it! You said it!  
Zero: But wait. I have a question. How is it that you two knew what was going to happen? I hadn't made the order yet, of course… In fact, I came here today with a completely different plan in mind…  
Jordan: We know!  
Zero: But how? _How_ do you know?  
Ashleigh: Oh, Lulu! You should know better than to expect answers out of us by now!  
Zero: But-  
(The ground suddenly starts rumbling. It lasts for a few moments, then stops.)  
Jordan: Was that… an earthquake?  
Zero: Maybe.  
Ashleigh: That didn't feel like an ordinary earthquake… Jordan, come on! (Leaves)  
Jordan: Okie dokie, Loki! (Follows)  
Zero: … Those two are as suspicious as ever.

(Another "earthquake" starts as Jordan and Ashleigh run out of the stadium.)  
Jordan: Ash, what's going on?  
Ashleigh: I was really hoping this wouldn't happen. We may have made a mistake, Jordy.  
Jordan: Time to break out the NyQuil again?  
Ashleigh: No, I'm afraid that won't work this time. We've screwed up the entirety of time and space.  
Jordan: Hey, new High Score!  
(Ashleigh pulls some strange-looking device from her mattress space.)  
Jordan: What is that? Have you been Universe-Jumping without me?  
Ashleigh: You know what Ten always says— "It's my Timey-Wimey Detector. It goes 'ding' when there's stuff." (The device dings.) Huh. There's stuff.  
Jordan: What stuff?  
Ashleigh: The universe is falling apart.  
Jordan: Ooh, Super High Score! (Pause) Maybe Pretty Green Eyes can help!  
Ashleigh: Well, he _is_ God. Let's go find him!  
(They go off)

In the stadium…

(People are freaking out because of the earthquakes.)  
Random Man: What's going on?  
Random Woman: Has anyone seen my son?  
Random Old Man: What's happening? Are the Americans invading us again!?  
Random Guy: No one ever knows what you're talking about.  
Random Soldier: Everyone stay calm!

(Jordan and Ashleigh run up to Suzaku, who's still on the stage sporting a nasty bruise.)  
Ashleigh: Oh, Suzy~!  
Jordan: (Sees the bruise and laughs)  
Suzaku: Oh no, not you two. I'm busy! (Tries to run away)  
Jordan: (Clings to him) Wait, wait! The entire world hangs in the balance!  
Suzaku: That's what you said last time! Turns out I wore that dress for nothing!  
Darlton: (Overhearing, gives Suzaku a look.)  
Jordan: But we mean it this time!  
Ashleigh: And in our defense, how on earth would you wearing a dress save the world?  
Suzaku: You presented a very convincing argument at the time…  
Ashleigh: Regardless, we are serious this time. We need your God Powers.  
Suzaku: And what's in it for me?  
(Jordan and Ashleigh look at each other, then back to Suzaku.)  
Both: Pizza Bagels.  
Suzaku: LET'S DO IT!

Meanwhile… With the Black Knights…

(Zero finally rejoins the troops.)  
Kallen: Zero! What the hell happened in there?  
Zero: Something… unexpected.  
Ohgi: From what I could see… the Princess just punched her own Knight in the face.  
Kallen: What!  
Tamaki: (Laughing) Yeah, it was _awesome_!  
Zero: Well, Euphemia certainly knows how to win people over…  
Kallen: Sarcasm isn't very becoming of you, Zero.  
Zero: For a pacifist Princess… it was a bizarre move.  
Random Terrorist #1: (Pointing) Hey, look!  
(Everyone looks down into the stadium. A giant tear in the Space-Time Continuum as appeared above the seating area.)  
Random Terrorist #2: What the hell is that?  
Zero: I'm… not sure.

In the Gawain…

C.C.: (Laughs) You and Charles have been trying to bring about the end of time for well over ten years, and yet these girls manage to stumble across it without ever meaning to. Ironic, don't you think?  
(Pause)  
C.C.: (Frown) There's no need to get snippy.  
(Pause)  
C.C.: (Shrugs and starts climbing out of the Gawain) Well, as long as the world is ending, I have no more obligation to anyone. I'm going to get some pizza.  
(Pause)  
C.C.: With Lelouch's credit card, of course. What do you take me for?

In the stadium…

(Jordan, Ashleigh, and Suzaku are still standing on stage when the tear appears.)  
(The wind picks up.)  
Jordan: What the-?  
Suzaku: Whoa! You _are_ serious this time!  
Ashleigh: Only we would be Girls Who Cried Apocalypse…  
Suzaku: (Yelling over all the chaos) So if I get rid of that thing, everything will be fine and normal?  
Ashleigh: (Also yelling) I don't think it's that simple!  
Suzaku: Got it! (Runs off)  
Ashleigh: Wait! Suzy! You can't just Spinzaku all your problems away!  
Jordan: Pretty Green Eyes!  
(Suzaku sprints to the edge of the stage and leaps off. He does a marvelous spin-kick, but as soon as his foot touches the tear he disappears.)  
Ashleigh: … Oh my Suzaku…  
Jordan: What… what happened to Pretty Green Eyes?  
Ashleigh: I think… I think he's… gone.  
Jordan: Now what do we do! ?  
Ashleigh: Lelouch killing Euphemia was a fixed point in time. Since we disrupted it, everything's falling apart.  
Jordan: So, to fix it… we kill Euphemia?  
Ashleigh: 'Fraid so.  
Jordan: (Pulls a bat from her Mallet Space) You don't have to tell me twice!

With the Black Knights…

Kallen: (Gaping) Did… did Suzaku… Did he just-?  
Tamaki: What the hell? What _is_ that thing?!  
Zero: (Watches Jordan produce a bat and gets some idea of what's going on.) Oh no… (He runs out)  
Kallen: (Chases him) Zero, wait! Where are you going?

A few minutes later… In the stadium…

(Jordan and Ashleigh have found Euphemia within the mobile command center.)  
Ashleigh: I'm sorry about this-  
Jordan: I'm not!  
Ashleigh: Hush! But there's really no other way.  
Euphemia: You mean, Suzaku has already-?  
Ashleigh: Yes. He's already gone. And everything else will be gone soon as well.  
Jordan: So we have to fix things!  
(Zero and Kallen suddenly run in.)  
Zero: What are you doing!?  
Euphemia: Zero?  
Jordan: Don't get in the way, we have to do this! (Raises the bat above her head)  
Zero: (Grabs Jordan) I won't let you!  
Jordan: (Squirms) Euphemia has to die! It's the only way! Don't you ruin this for me, Lulu!  
Kallen: What's going on?  
Ashleigh: We saved Euphemia from being killed, but that's caused time and space to fall apart.  
Kallen: … That _would_ happen to you guys.  
Jordan: (Still fighting Zero) But we're trying to fix it! So let me go!  
Zero: And watch you kill Euphie? She's done nothing wrong! She doesn't deserve to die!  
Ashleigh: It's Euphemia's life, or the entire world. You have to choose.  
Euphemia: So, if I die, it will fix everything? Suzaku will come back, and nothing will fall apart? Everything will return to normal?  
Ashleigh: That's the idea.  
Euphemia: … Then I'll do it.  
Zero and Jordan: What?  
Euphemia: If it's for the entire world… I think it's for the best.  
Zero: But Euphie-  
Euphemia: My being alive is what's causing this. Therefore, it's my fault this is happening. I have to take responsibility for that.  
Ashleigh: I'm glad you understand.  
Jordan: Alright! Let's do this! Think happy thoughts!  
Zero: No! Surely there's another way. There has to be another way!  
Jordan: There is no other way!  
Zero: You haven't even considered any alternatives!  
_(Gunshot)  
_(Euphemia falls to the ground, dead.)  
(Everyone looks at Ashleigh, who is holding a gun.)  
Zero: You… what are you doing!?  
Ashleigh: Saving your ass, is what.  
Jordan: (Throws down the bat) Damn it, _I_ wanted to do it!

(Everyone waits for a moment. Nothing happens.)  
Jordan: Something's wrong… Nothing's changing.  
Zero: But you said killing her would fix everything! This means you just killed Euphie for nothing!  
Ashleigh: (Shoots Zero in the leg) Hush up, I'm trying to think.  
Zero: (Crumples to the floor) _What in the world-  
_Kallen: What did you do that for? !  
Ashleigh: The world is ending anyway. I mean, why not?  
Jordan: And if everything was fixed, it would have never happened.  
Ashleigh: Exactly. But it's not. Why is that?  
Jordan: (Shrugs)  
(Another earthquake starts.)  
Jordan: Maybe we were too late?  
Ashleigh: It looks that way. We'll have to go back.  
Jordan: Woo-hoo! Let's do the Time Warp again!  
Kallen: What are you-?  
Ashleigh: Sorry Kallen, gotta go!  
(Jordan and Ashleigh run away.)  
Kallen: …  
Zero: (Clutching his leg) _AH, THAT SMARTS!_

(Ashleigh leads Jordan onto the street outside the stadium. She goes up to a blue British police call box circa the 1960's.)  
Jordan: What the heck is this?  
Ashleigh: It's a TARDIS!  
Jordan: What the hell is a TARDIS?  
Ashleigh: Don't ask questions, just use it! (Opens the door) Come on, it's bigger on the inside!  
(The two board the TARDIS. It is indeed bigger on the inside.)  
Jordan: So we're going back in time to stop ourselves from stopping Lulu from ordering Euphemia to slaughter all the Japanese, right?  
Ashleigh: …... yes.  
Jordan: Okie doke! (Jumps up to the console) How do you drive this thing?  
Ashleigh: (Flips a switch) I have no idea!  
Jordan: My favourite! (Presses random buttons and turns random knobs.)  
(They run around the console pulling levers and whatnot until…)  
_Vworp-vworp! Vworp-vworp!  
_(The light on top of the police box blinks and the entire thing vanishes into thin air.)  
(Jordan and Ashleigh are thrown about the inside the TARDIS as it flies through the Time Vortex.)  
Jordan: Wee! This is fun!  
Ashleigh: And you say you don't like roller coasters…  
_(THUMP!)  
_(The TARDIS has landed.)  
(The two run over and peek their heads out of the door.)

Late at night… in the Clubhouse…

Suzaku: (Sitting in a swivel chair the wrong way, slowly making his way across the room.) Suzaku scoot!  
Jordan: Uh… okay?  
Ashleigh: This can't be right.  
Jordan: (From the other room) Suzy! Where'd you go?  
Suzaku: (Bolts) Suzaku abscond!  
Jordan: Was that me?  
Ashleigh: Paradox! We have to leave! (Flips another switch.)  
(The TARDIS takes off again!)

Midday… Outside the Clubhouse…

(This time they look out the door to see that the TARDIS has landed in a giant pile of snow… and also on top of Rivalz.)  
Rivals: _HELP. ME._  
Ashleigh: Whoopsie!  
(They take off…)

Morning… at the Clubhouse…

(They look outside and find Lelouch silently sneaking away from the rest of the group while no one is looking.)  
Lelouch: (Spots them and their death-glares.) But, weren't you just-?  
Jordan: We're watching you.  
(They shut the door and take off again.)  
Jordan: Ash, don't you think we're going in the wrong direction?  
Ashleigh: I'm trying! This thing is impossible to drive!

Late at night…

(Before they can even open the door, Suzaku, covered in mud and pond scum, slams into it. He falls inside.)  
Jordan: What the-?  
Suzaku: Where did this thing come from?  
Ashleigh: Don't worry about it okay bye! (Shoves him out)  
(They take off.)

Morning… at the Clubhouse…

(There's a knock at the door as soon as they land.)  
Jordan: Not again.  
C.C.: (From outside) Long time no see, Doctor.  
Ashleigh: Wait wait wait _what_? (Bursts open the door) C.C., you know The Doctor? !  
C.C.: Are you really that surprised?  
Ashleigh: Well, no- but- I- …. Ugh, when I get back—we're discussing this!  
C.C.: Sure thing.  
(Ashleigh slams the door and the TARDIS takes off again.)

Late at night yet again…

(The TARDIS has landed in an alleyway outside a familiar looking-bar.)  
(The sound of a fight.)  
Kallen: (Standing, albeit wobbly, above a pile of unconscious thugs) YEAH! Who else wants some? Huh!? Do you? Do you want some of this? You can't _handle _this! (She takes a swig of beer.)  
Ashleigh: Hm. I don't remember this happening.  
Jordan: Me either…  
Suzaku: (Leaning out a window) KALLEN!  
Kallen: What?  
Suzaku: Suzaku is disappoint! Violence bad!  
Kallen: What're you-?  
Suzaku: (Leaps out of aforementioned window) Unless Suzaku involved! (Puts up his fists)  
Kallen: Bro, do you even LIFT? (Swings at him)  
Suzaku: Suzaku battle!  
Ashleigh: Mortal Kombat!  
(They fight)  
Ashleigh: HOW did we miss this?  
Jordan: Get'er, Pretty Green Eyes! Show her your God-Fists!  
Kallen: (Knocks Suzaku in the head) Take that!  
Suzaku: Hah! Suzaku feel no pain! Suzaku invincible! (Does some crazy ninja move)  
Kallen: Oh-no, bro… (She's thrown to the ground.)  
Ashleigh: FINISH HIM!  
Suzaku: (Puts his foot on top of Kallen and pumps his fists in the air) Suzaku victorious!  
Ashleigh: Alright, I've seen enough.  
Jordan: Yay Pretty Green Eyes!  
(They take off once more!)

Evening… Some undisclosed location…

_(Thunk!)  
_Jordan: That landing didn't sound right…  
(They go to the door and look.)  
(Random Terrorist #3 screams from beneath the TARDIS.)  
Jordan: Oops! Sorry! It's not like it'll cut into your screen-time any!  
Ashleigh: Hah!  
Random Terrorist #3: _MY ORGANS!_  
(Another take off!)

One day… outside the Clubhouse…

(Lelouch suddenly appears inside the TARDIS with a bat hoisted above his head.)  
Lelouch: What the-?  
Jordan: Lulu! How did you get in here?  
Lelouch: You materialized around me! And who are you people? What on earth is going on?  
Ashleigh: Jordy… I think we may have gone all the way back to the first chapter!  
Jordan: (Gasps)  
Lelouch: What are you talking about? Answer me!  
Jordan: Shut up, Lulu. We're busy! (Shoves him outside)  
Lelouch: (Continues beating on the door) Hey!  
Ashleigh: Maybe if I turn this knob this way and this switch that way…  
Jordan: Here, let me try! After all, I can drive the Lancelot!  
Ashleigh: I don't think that's how it works.  
Jordan: Well, we've got to do something! (Punches some buttons and spins some wheels. Sparks fly everywhere.) Now we're getting somewhere!  
Ashleigh: Sparks are always a good sign. (Pulls some levers)  
(The TARDIS starts to take off again with Lelouch still pounding on the door. It disappears in front of him and he falls backwards, flabbergasted.)

The morning of the SAZ opening ceremony… Before sunrise… At the Clubhouse…

Jordan: (Looking at a monitor) Looks like we made it!  
Ashleigh: Okay, now we have to fix the future- er, the present- without causing a paradox. No running into ourselves.  
Jordan: (Salutes) Aye-aye captain!  
(They leave the TARDIS to sneak around the Clubhouse. They set several booby-traps, such as: removing and hiding the Lancelot's energy filler; moving Rivalz's scooter somewhere downtown; blocking the doorways of the Clubhouse with couches, tables, and other various pieces of furniture; stealing all the coffee from the kitchen; coating the hallways with syrup; putting Lelouch's hand in a glass of warm water; and covering all the exits with saran wrap.)  
Jordan: I'd like to see us get through all of that! We're way too lazy for that mess!  
Ashleigh: And without coffee, no less.  
Jordan: But what did putting Lulu's hand in water accomplish?  
Ashleigh: I dunno. I thought it'd be funny. Does that prank even work?  
Jordan: (Shrugs)  
Ashleigh: Anyway, let's get back to the present to see if everything's back to normal!  
(They go back to the TARDIS and fly off!)

Midday… at the Stadium…

(The TARDIS lands outside the Stadium. Screaming and gunfire can be heard from the inside.)  
(Jordan and Ashleigh run inside and grimace at all the carnage.)  
Euphemia: (Standing amidst the fleeing Japanese people with a machine gun, smiling creepily. Tears are streaming down her face.)  
Ashleigh: Well, I'd never thought I'd be glad to see a crazy Euphie standing atop a mountain of corpses.  
Jordan: I'm still mad you shot her before I could hit her with my bat!  
Zero: (Comes stumbling into the vomitorium) You… What the hell did you do? !  
Jordan: Whatcha mean, Lulu?  
Zero: I remember… something different happening… and yet, I remember what really happened as well.  
Ashleigh: Two memories of the same event with different outcomes. Hashtag: Time Travel Problems.  
Jordan: Is Pretty Green Eyes okay?  
Zero: I'm not sure… But I have to go. There's something I have to do. (Leaves)  
Jordan: Ash, I don't like this part.  
Ashleigh: Neither do I, but apparently it _has_ to happen. Damn plot device gods.  
Jordan: Now Pretty Green Eyes won't be fun anymore!  
Ashleigh: We'll just have to try harder, I guess. Look on the bright side: The Lancelot can fly now!  
Jordan: True.  
Ashleigh: And by the end of the day tomorrow, Lelouch will have his memory erased.  
Jordan: Why is that a bright side?  
Ashleigh: Because then I get to wear the cape! Hell, I could even become Zero! Wouldn't that be fun?  
Jordan: For a year, anyway.  
Ashleigh: Don't rub it in…  
Jordan: Hmm…. Okay! Sounds good to me! But we'd better get out of here for now. Things are about to get cray-cray.  
Ashleigh: The most cray-cray. Not even the Clubhouse is safe. Better lay low until the heat dies down. Maybe a week. Two, tops.  
Jordan: I'm thinking… Australia?  
Ashleigh: Fine by me!  
Jordan: If only London wasn't a warzone…  
Ashleigh: Beggars can't be choosers, I suppose.  
Jordan: It's all Britannia's fault!  
Ashleigh: Well, duh. After all, if we've learned anything from all of this, it's that Britannia did it! Everything. All the time. Forever.  
(An explosion goes off down the street.)  
Jordan: That's my cue to leave. (Runs off)  
Ashleigh: My thoughts exactly. (Follows)  
(They run to a nearby parking garage and hop onto Rivalz's scooter, driving off into the distance and leaving behind a trail of destruction and Skittles.)

真の終  
_Shin no Owari  
_**True End**

XxX

**Author's Notes—** References. References everywhere.

I apologize if you cannot read the Japanese text above, but it _is_ our final chapter and I just couldn't pass it up. Technically the final character can be read as "shuu" rather than "owari" since it's a shortened version, but I went with the familiar meaning when transliterating. Both words mean "end" anyway. But I digress. That's not what's important here. What _is_ important is that this is The End. The final end. It's kind of sad. Ending this fic is like tying a bow on the wonderful memory that is this story and its creation and life. I'll miss it, but I realize that it's gone on long enough, and I'd rather end it with some dignity than let it trail on forever. I could reference so many movie and video game franchises with that last sentence, but I won't. We've had enough references for one chapter.

Despite all of my meandering thoughts, I want to thank you guys again for sticking with us and encouraging our insanity. We hope you've enjoyed reading this madness as much as we've had writing it. Trolling fictional characters is surprisingly satisfying. I'm sorry that is chapter isn't necessarily "wacky, crazy fun" like they usually are, but I've found that I can't produce that zaniness on my own. Jordan and I come together like some bizarre chemical reaction that results in the most mindless silliness that can only be described as outrageously fun. We're like Lelouch and Suzaku if their main objective was to create happy-spastic-chaos. Regardless, I think this chapter is fun in its own way—and not just because I get all the references!

And for added fun: I actually managed to get ahold of Jordan for this final soirée! Here are her Notes as a farewell message to all of you:

_**Author's Notes— **Hi everyone! I'm sorry to say that this will be the final chapter of Britannia Did It! Yes, yes, I know this is sad but all brilliant things must come to an end. I'm sorry it took this long to finish it but college has made me, shall we put it, less crazy. But let me give a try one more time… (Maybe someone should bring me skittles :) )._

_Writing Britannia Did It! was a highlight of my life. Me and Ash even had plans on selling all our old books with the side notes and original ideas once we made it big—but we've had to live miles apart with mean cruel monsters called professors who make you work till your fingers are numb and you have at least twenty paper cuts. But I ramble. I'm a media studies major right now and I plan on—if I ever make it to where I have a little extra cash and Ash agrees—I want to make this into a movie. Granted it might be 30 years down the road but I will make it!_

_I did not help with this last chapter because I work now when I come home and I keep busy between my insane family and school. But I hope you all enjoy just the same and enjoy my last words. Perhaps in some far-off land we never really stopped and Jordan and Ashleigh are still running around with Lulu and Suzy somewhere... Driving the Lancelot through walls, eating pizza, wearing a cape, snuggling with Cheese-Kun, and just annoying the crap out of Lulu!_

_I've appreciated everything from all of our readers over the years, and if you've stuck with us long enough to read them all: Thank you!_

_Happy Holidays!_

**Sorry for the Wall o' Words here,**

_**-Destiny**_

You guys have all of our thanks and absolute gratitude. Seriously. Stay awesome.  
Love, Ashleigh & Jordan


End file.
